MENA 2008 Spouse Reunion

[nunyab 0]

So if my husband has a SSN and Green card he also needs an EAD???

[Staashi 371]

So if my husband has a SSN and Green card he also needs an EAD???

No, his husband will be allowed to work with the Green Card if he is coming on a CR1 - if it's the K3 than no, he'll need an EAD.

[Martiniolive 0]

I applied for our I130 12-24-07 my husband will be here in 2 hours! Yippie! now he would technically be here last month but we decided he should spend EID with his family first.

[Nothing1234 2]

So if my husband has a SSN and Green card he also needs an EAD???

No. Green Card gives you the status of residence and legal rights to work in United States. EAD is for us k1 and k3 folks

I applied for our I130 12-24-07 my husband will be here in 2 hours! Yippie! now he would technically be here last month but we decided he should spend EID with his family first.

Awesome babes!!! I'm so excited for you!!!

[sereia 0]

Unfortunately I've been there too, Karamella. I'm available by PM anytime to talk. I wonder why sometimes husband's seemingly adjust so well when others struggle so terribly?

[nunyab 0]

So if my husband has a SSN and Green card he also needs an EAD???

No. Green Card gives you the status of residence and legal rights to work in United States. EAD is for us k1 and k3 folks

I applied for our I130 12-24-07 my husband will be here in 2 hours! Yippie! now he would technically be here last month but we decided he should spend EID with his family first.

Awesome babes!!! I'm so excited for you!!!

that worried me for a second thinking there was something I had over looked.

I applied for our I130 12-24-07 my husband will be here in 2 hours! Yippie! now he would technically be here last month but we decided he should spend EID with his family first.

whoooo hooooo I wondered what happend to you two......... thank you for letting us know i am sooo excited for you.

[Nothing1234 2]

Unfortunately I've been there too, Karamella. I'm available by PM anytime to talk. I wonder why sometimes husband's seemingly adjust so well when others struggle so terribly?

Where have you been? I keep leaving you posts but you're ignoring me

I think everyone I have known so far has had some issues with adjustment. It's just not the same here as other countries. No matter what people seem to display. Sometimes people don't always talk/share about the adjustment period. It's really fooking hard. My hubby and I have talked through it and I thank god he is open with his feelings but he's was severly depressed and misssed his friends a WHOLE BUNCH. He knew before coming it was not a rose garden but no matter how much we prepare them (no work, not the same friends, no family, different foods, other cultural things) they just can't know it till they live it.

to you both!!

[nunyab 0]

how do you guys suggest I help my husband????

[sereia 0]

I know I've already told ya this countless times but I'll say it again because I think its very important.

Make sure he gets a job immediately! If he has a professional field and it may take a long time to get a job in it? Get A job, any job in the meantime! He just needs to keep busy. Get a job. Sign up for ESL. Volunteer. Take up hobbies. etc, etc, etc.

[KHPerfectMatch 1]

Unfortunately I've been there too, Karamella. I'm available by PM anytime to talk. I wonder why sometimes husband's seemingly adjust so well when others struggle so terribly?

Thanks for your kind offer.... I think the answer to your question is that everyone is different and certainly personality, expectations, your reason for choosing to immigrate (obviously reasons BESIDES marrying an American), who and what you left behind, and in my opinion one of the BIGGEST factors of all..... AGE. If he was 25 this would be a big adventure with PLENTY of time to make his mark in the USA.... and he wouldn't be leaving behind children, or a successful business.

My husband is almost 48. He didn't want to leave Egypt and when we met I was considering living in Egypt part time until I could retire there. He tried to convince me to "retire" NOW..... because he just didn't want to live here. He has 3 children in Egypt and an 80 year old Mom, and of course a bunch of siblings and nieces and nephews who consider him their FAVORITE UNCLE.

To be honest when I left Egypt last February I was SURE I didn't want to live there full time and I was almost as sure that he might change his mind about coming here. We just discussed tonight how as each of us get older we find HOME more and more appealing. Problem is home isn't the same place for both of us.

I told him how many of my Egyptian friends here tell me they could never live full time in Egypt after living here for 10 or more years, and thought I was INSANE to even consider retiring there. He told me that this may be the case for people who immigrated young, or didn't leave children behind.... or had successful careers here or had children who chose to live here. But he just can't imagine it. (no DUH!)

Having an outgoing personality, alot of faith in God, self -confidence, a flexible attitude, being non-judgemental, being fairly fluent in English, having an adventurous spirit, keeping your expectations low (at least in the beginning) in my husband's case just isn't enough to keep the blues away... but all are qualities that I think would be very helpful for all immigrants.

External/environmental factors that are helpful are having a large ex-pat community in the vicinity, similar climate, access to transporation (either public or a car), a compatible Muslim community (to whatever his religious "leanings" are), good (and easy and cheap) ways to keep in touch with family back home, something to DO!!!! And a stash of $$$ doesn't hurt either!

I think there is really no concrete way to KNOW how someone will handle the move in advance. But there have to be factors that could be predictors... but who's sensible enough to think of THAT when you've been swept off your feet...

Maybe we need to take polls and do a research project...

[sereia 0]

Well my husband is in his 20's and that sure didn't help! LOL

[nunyab 0]

I know I've already told ya this countless times but I'll say it again because I think its very important.

Make sure he gets a job immediately! If he has a professional field and it may take a long time to get a job in it? Get A job, any job in the meantime! He just needs to keep busy. Get a job. Sign up for ESL. Volunteer. Take up hobbies. etc, etc, etc.

wait wait wait..... is this who i think it is in real life????? If it is I have taken your information to heart and have found classes and a possible job within walking distance from the appartment. I worry about the "missing" family part and how to bring him into typical life here. Without depression

[sweet_peach 0]

My Habibi arrived on Oct 17th (actually arrived in ATL at 1am on the 18th due to delays).

I was a long wait to get him here. From the first time I went to Lebanon until he arrived it was about a 1 1/2. I know its still not as long as some people wait and I am very greatful for that.

[Aymsgirl 0]

Karamella...Im just an email away and I can understand your frustrations. My husband basically was here 7 months without work and now he is working but not a permanent job and with kids and a successful law business and at 38 it wasn't easy to leave either. He really hasn't had any luck with real friends here. At first I think people were nosy or curious about him but they do not come around much anymore. I think if he could connect with somebody it would do him some good. We have no Arabs in our hometown but only a few in our surrounding cities so there isn't much ME connection here. He misses his family, children and friends from back home. He is torn, because he has our family here that he loves and we can't leave the US for years to come due to custody agreements. He did get his DL lately and that has given him some independence. But still it's a struggle to see what I know as my MANLY MAN give up some of his dignity for his wife to care for him. It really bothers him. I really do understand what you are going through. I think showing him support and helping to keep him busy and showing your love is really all that you can do. all my prayers and thoughts are with you and I hope that his EAD comes quickly and that he gets a paying job soon!

[KHPerfectMatch 1]

Thanks Tasha, I know you know what I'm going through and H often expresses his hopes that your hubby's life gets easier SOON. He REALLY empathizes with what he's going through! I think they have so much in common with the exception that H doesn't have kids here.... which I think ties him less to this place.....(and maybe me).

It snowed about 4 inches last night... first time he's ever seen snow. He can't wait to get the kids on the computer and show them the yard with the webcam... I just wish so badly that they could visit us here at least for summers. But I know it isn't going to happen so I need to stop dreaming.....

Hugs GF!

K