delivery poll

[rebeccajo 14]

I've said it before and I'll say it till I die - just don't give birth at home. Do it in the hospital where there are interventions available should the need arise.

My son would have died and likely so would I had I chosen an at-home birth. I won't go into the story here - I've posted it on VJ before. If Nessa has missed it before and wants or needs the info, she can PM me.

As far as drugs go, most hospitals will allow drug-free births if that's what Mom wants.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I've said it before and I'll say it till I die - just don't give birth at home. Do it in the hospital where there are interventions available should the need arise.

My son would have died and likely so would I had I chosen an at-home birth. I won't go into the story here - I've posted it on VJ before. If Nessa has missed it before and wants or needs the info, she can PM me.

As far as drugs go, most hospitals will allow drug-free births if that's what Mom wants.

Good advice. Again, Nessa, a birthing class would really put your mind at ease as it would answer all the questions you might have.

[Dr. Obvious 49]

My point about modern interventions is that in their place they can save lives, the problem is when they are used unecessarily. Baby's are meant to get squeezed and get hormones from the birth. This doesnt mean a women who has a drugs or a ceasar is thought less of, just that natural birth is just that 'natural'. How nature intended and so far we haven't come up with anything better.

Natural birth is a bunch of marketing nonsense.

In nature, 10% of babies died and with them, 1% of all mothers. In nature, women have no true control over their fertility and were doomed to produce children until their uterus fell out of their body (prolapse) or they died. In nature, there is no such thing as ultrasound monitoring, blood pressure checks, or consistent complete nutrition. That is all man-made invention. So, unless you are pregnant and giving birth in a third world hamlet where you have no access to modern medical care, good consistent complete nutrition, no running water or electricity, or access to reliable birth control and have the freedom to use it, it is not 'natural'.

If we are just going to use 'natural' to describe a birth without the benefit of pain medication, why not just call a spade a spade and call it 'painful birthing'. Well, that won't sell many books to privileged, modern western women who have no idea how good they have it.

Where did the idea that it was good to have pain during childbirth, or so called 'natural childbirth' come from? Contrary to the idea that women dreamt it up in response to the twilight sleep births of past, the idea came from a bunch of sexist, racist, classist men and women who believed that there was a shortage of middle to upper class white women having children. They reason they believed this was because they had a quack theory that their level of civilization made them to unfit to give birth. They made up nonsense such as among 'primitive peoples', ie brown people, women understood it was their place to breed until death, accepted it, and because of that, they had quick, painless births. They had to retrain middle to upper class white women to accept their fate as breeders by teaching them that the pain they felt was only a product of their 'situation' (all in their heads, those silly hystericals) and that they could be taught to be like their 'primitive' sisters with X techniques and they would feel no pain once they gave in to the idea of doing nothing but breeding and trusted strongly in God. A certain belief was also thrown it that if women did feel pain, it was only because they deserved it, the fall of man, and all of that, but it *might* be avoidable. Sound crazy? Well, it's true. The founder of the modern natural childbirth movement was a British MALE doctor before and during WWII who believed strongly in eugenics and feared the poor, brown people he thought were going to take over his island. Time to google some good old Dr. Grantley #######-Read.

That is where all the nonsense started. Women demanded pain relief during labor because it hurt, because it hurt, decided to stop having as many children, and this was a response against it. Women either deserve to feel pain or it is all in their pretty little heads. The pain of labor is no different than any other pain of the body and serves little to no purpose, beyond the fact some people feel it is deserved and must be endured, regardless of consequences. Not a very feminist idea, IMO. Over time, the real roots of the movement were swept under the rug and replaced with ideas that birthing was a kind of extreme endurance sport and if you made it through without pain relief, then you deserve some kind of medal of motherhood for doing so. A bunch of benefits with no basis in reality were thought up to justify the decision. For example, show me exactly what hormones these are that the baby supposedly absolutely needs during birth? Where are the studies to prove that there are worse outcomes without them?

[Nessa 23]

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

As for listening to terrible childbirth experiences, I've heard it all. I know it can be simple and it can have complications. I won't be worrying about any of that right now. We'll deal with it when the time comes.

[rebeccajo 14]

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

As for listening to terrible childbirth experiences, I've heard it all. I know it can be simple and it can have complications. I won't be worrying about any of that right now. We'll deal with it when the time comes.

I think this is a very healthy attitude.

A pregnant friend once said some very similar things. Her opinion was this - having a baby is kinda like Christmas. You hope Santa will bring you gifts. What difference does it make whether he comes down the chimney or through the front door? As long as you get presents.

[Nessa 23]

exactly

[chri'stina 190]

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

As for listening to terrible childbirth experiences, I've heard it all. I know it can be simple and it can have complications. I won't be worrying about any of that right now. We'll deal with it when the time comes.

I agree that's the best attitude to have, I tried to have similar. So when I found out I needed a c-section I didn't panic or anything, I was ready for it to happen to arrive to the destination and I trusted the reasoning behind it (it wasn't just like I tried a little and they said ok well, it's c/s time, it was a process that lead up to it). And even though my story wasn't ideal, I don't want others to be scared about it. I mean, it's going to be like nothing you have ever experienced, but women do it every day all over the world and then decide to do it again for the most part. So it can't be all horrifying, right?

[Chica Yeyé 41]

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

I might take the classes. I'm very open when it comes to childbirth. The plan is to the deliver a healthy baby. Of course I'd prefer just to lie in there and have the baby, but if drugs, an epidural is necessary, sure why not, if C-section is necessary, sure why not. It'll be in the hands of the doctors, let's try the most natural way, if something is not working, let's do whatever it takes, I don't mind. I want to arrive to that destination, it doesn't matter which road i take.

As for listening to terrible childbirth experiences, I've heard it all. I know it can be simple and it can have complications. I won't be worrying about any of that right now. We'll deal with it when the time comes.

Nessa, this is a GREAT attitude to have hermana.

[Nessa 23]

I guess i don't panic about c-section because when I was 20 i had a car accident and broke 3 hip bones and the doctor said I should never deliver vaginally. So i've been prepared for it all my life. i told the doctors about it, but they said the original plan is vaginally. I do hope if it';s like that I have no problems later on with my hips.

[rebeccajo 14]

I guess i don't panic about c-section because when I was 20 i had a car accident and broke 3 hip bones and the doctor said I should never deliver vaginally. So i've been prepared for it all my life. i told the doctors about it, but they said the original plan is vaginally. I do hope if it';s like that I have no problems later on with my hips.

Nessa, you mention your broken bones.

I never did exactly know why Zach's birth didn't go 'normally'. All I know is he would not enter the birth canal. I dilated, had contractions (for many hours), the whole nine yards. After we ended up with a c-section, my doctor told me that my 'body just wouldn't work'. He said I didn't cause labor to shut down (I reacted badly to a long labor with no progress - Zach's dad said you never heard such cussing). My doctor said it doesn't matter how the woman reacts emotionally - that the body will take over and do what it is supposed to, no matter how the mind fights it.

Anyway, I've always taken his comment that my 'body wouldn't work' to mean that my bone structure was either too small to deliver vaginally, or that the pelvis didn't open like it's supposed to. I'm sure bones have a lot to do with being able to give birth.

[Nessa 23]

I mentioned to the 3 doctors i saw. all of them said we'll see how it goes. i can;t do anything about it. i have to trust them to decice which is best.

i know for a fact x-ray won't show anything, because when i wqas at the hospital, the x-ray only showed 1 broken bone, and then i went back i dunno why but I went to one of those fancy machine thingy u go inside and it showed 3 bones. so if there's a wayu to see the bones that were damaged back then, that machine would do it.

but i doubt they'll do it, u know, insurance stuff.

and the doctor said i cannot have normal birth because of that, back then.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

just make sure to mention it to the doc's over and over and over again.

[Caladan 19]

Natural birth is a bunch of marketing nonsense.

In nature, 10% of babies died and with them, 1% of all mothers. In nature, women have no true control over their fertility and were doomed to produce children until their uterus fell out of their body (prolapse) or they died. In nature, there is no such thing as ultrasound monitoring, blood pressure checks, or consistent complete nutrition. That is all man-made invention. So, unless you are pregnant and giving birth in a third world hamlet where you have no access to modern medical care, good consistent complete nutrition, no running water or electricity, or access to reliable birth control and have the freedom to use it, it is not 'natural'.

We should be careful here not to confuse "modern midwife-RN supervised home birth" with "back in the caveman days." A good midwife will have access to a portable fetal heart monitor, medications, and will also be trusted to call the hospital if need be. Studies have shown that when the mother is healthy and the pregnancy is generally low-risk, the outcomes between midwife-attended homebirths and hospital births end up the same.

And the rationale isn't "women must suffer", but "I really don't want to have a C-section because I got so much painkillers that labor halted." C-sections are up by 50% in some hospitals. A lot of women don't want to get cut open just because the doctor's worried about getting sued. (There's a fair amount of hippie bullsh*t, too, but that doesn't describe most of the women I know, or their reasons for trying to go without painkillers.)

The only caveats I see is that a lot of those studies use data from Europe, where homebirth is often a lot more common than it is in the U.S. (Without 10% dead babies or moms.) And that to me says midwives there are better integrated with the existing medical structure, such that they have hospitals that they work with, and that suggests that outcomes might vary in the U.S., where the practice is comparatively rarer.

And, of course, the problem is that one can't always predict which births will go badly. Personally, I'd want something attached to the hospital, whether I wanted painkillers or not.

A number of my friends have used birthing centers, which seems to be a good compromise for people that want it. They're attached to hospitals, so if something goes wrong, they can get into surgery. But the birth itself is a lot less medicalized.

Nessa, you seem to have a great attitude. Anyhow, I popped in mostly to report that my friends and mom and aunts were all over the map with their first kid. Practically painless labor under an hour to 36 hours to emergency c-section due to eclampsia. Birthing centers, traditional hospitals, one nearly in the car on the way to the hospital.

[Donna A 4]

i was at the hospital 2 hours 16 minutes when i delivered. i labored all day at home with lower back pain and the feeling i had to poop all day. didnt know it was labor because i was a month early and was my first child. i even went to work and told my friend i have a back ache...she told me to go home before i hurt the baby. i went home. my boss about had a heart attack when he found out i was in labor at work.