I'm switching from F-1 to J1 but there's a twist

[Smeagol K 0]

For the past 8 years, I have been a graduate student here in the US (3 yr masters, and 5 for the Phd). I will graduate at the end of this month. I have a few postdoc offers to start next month (Jan 2009) and need some advice.

I know the simplest way would be to leave the country and get a new visa and reenter. However, traveling is not really an option right now.

A) So it looks like I have to file I-539, to change status, and the processing time is 3 months. They want my original I-94, so does this mean I can't leave the country while this is being processed?

B) In the last year, I changed my name from Firstname Middlename Lastname to Firstname Middlename without leaving the country. My embassy in SF just issued me a new passport. My school gave me a new I-20. However, I cannot change my name with social security because my I-94 still carries my old name. I filed form I-102 but it got returned saying I should just talk to Customs and Border control. I went to their office and the woman said she couldn't change it because my (now expired) visa had my old name. I'm not sure if she just pulled that out of her head right there of if that is really the deal (it's very hard to get straight answers from anyone).

So now, I want to know if it would be ok to file a I-539 with my new passport (new name), my J1 paperwork (new name), but with a I-94 in my old name? Will this just lead them to refuse processing the paperwork? Is there someone I can talk to and ask these questions?

Any leads/information you can point me to would be most appreciated. Thanks!