How to cancel an application you filed with VSC?

[prince+angel 3]

Lots of good advice here from everyone with genuine concern for your happiness

Hardest things to say - "I love you" & "I'm sorry"

Take deep breaths & maybe a time out then remind eachother of these 2 simple sayings ...

Good Luck to you both

[faryan 4]

Mahitab, did ever, anyone, in yr entire life tell u marriages r easy? long distance marriages r even worse. we all know it. ppl willing to break up isnt surprising to anyone. last time ive got mad i didnt even care to cancell any petition, i was so mad my first interest was to cancel the marriage itself. cut off internet, phone line (realy cut, not stop answering)spent my bday in anger, inspecting myself if there is any emotional change, i miss him more or i am mad more, and all the 5 phases of pain process. i was thinking of him and see red. id see comp and feel like throwing off the window. my husband at first thought is the usual twice a month forever breakup, then he realized is serious, came here to regain territory (aka wife aka me). thing isnt that this convinced me that he loves me. convinced me that all the phone, internet or whatever other comunnication fight or argument is dust in the wind. it just doesnt compare to a face to face discussion. ended up disscusing in bedroom (because even if none of u mentions it, lets face it. we all lack "bedroom" and that gets yr nerves) and i honestly forgot why i was so mad about. we all get frustrated and whos there to take it? the other person involved, aka spouse. even if is not guilty.

so i agree with all the other opinions. give it time. at least to see if u miss him. decisions made in anger r never real, they r impulses. but shouldnt cancel the petition even if u r mad for 2 reasons. if u love him, and u know u r not visiting him because is dangerous, u want him out of there too, no? regardless to the fact u want to spend rest of yr life with him or not. and if u r so hurt that u stopped loving him, then why just cancel the petition? if u get it approved, and he gets there, u have a life time to revenge. (the last one was a joke, ofc)

[faryan 4]

Mahitab, did ever, anyone, in yr entire life tell u marriages r easy? long distance marriages r even worse. we all know it. ppl willing to break up isnt surprising to anyone. last time ive got mad i didnt even care to cancell any petition, i was so mad my first interest was to cancel the marriage itself. cut off internet, phone line (realy cut, not stop answering)spent my bday in anger, inspecting myself if there is any emotional change, i miss him more or i am mad more, and all the 5 phases of pain process. i was thinking of him and see red. id see comp and feel like throwing off the window. my husband at first thought is the usual twice a month forever breakup, then he realized is serious, came here to regain territory (aka wife aka me). thing isnt that this convinced me that he loves me. convinced me that all the phone, internet or whatever other comunnication fight or argument is dust in the wind. it just doesnt compare to a face to face discussion. ended up disscusing in bedroom (because even if none of u mentions it, lets face it. we all lack "bedroom" and that gets yr nerves) and i honestly forgot why i was so mad about. we all get frustrated and whos there to take it? the other person involved, aka spouse. even if is not guilty.

so i agree with all the other opinions. give it time. at least to see if u miss him. decisions made in anger r never real, they r impulses.

[4Lifer 0]

Kentucky woman

She shines with her own kind of light

She looks at you once

And a day thats all wrong looks all right

And I love her

God knows I love her

Kentucky woman

If she get to know you

She goin to own you

Kentucky woman

Check it out babe thats what your man is really thinking![/b]

[Cham 3]

sweetie

at one time or another we all say something harsh to someone and I can bet you, he feels like total dogcrap for it.

I know kai and i have but if you love someone you forgive. Just take a few days to cool off and let him know what he said cut you deep and it hurt. Then say I forgive you and TRULY mean it.

I would hate to see you jump to a rash choice and then it would be to late to fix it

[notime4haterz 0]

convinced me that all the phone, internet or whatever other comunnication fight or argument is dust in the wind. it just doesnt compare to a face to face discussion. ended up disscusing in bedroom (because even if none of u mentions it, lets face it. we all lack "bedroom" and that gets yr nerves) and i honestly forgot why i was so mad about. we all get frustrated and whos there to take it? the other person involved, aka spouse. even if is not guilty.

[Morning Sunshine 0]

Mahitab, did ever, anyone, in yr entire life tell u marriages r easy? long distance marriages r even worse. we all know it. ppl willing to break up isnt surprising to anyone. last time ive got mad i didnt even care to cancell any petition, i was so mad my first interest was to cancel the marriage itself. cut off internet, phone line (realy cut, not stop answering)spent my bday in anger, inspecting myself if there is any emotional change, i miss him more or i am mad more, and all the 5 phases of pain process. i was thinking of him and see red. id see comp and feel like throwing off the window. my husband at first thought is the usual twice a month forever breakup, then he realized is serious, came here to regain territory (aka wife aka me). thing isnt that this convinced me that he loves me. convinced me that all the phone, internet or whatever other comunnication fight or argument is dust in the wind. it just doesnt compare to a face to face discussion. ended up disscusing in bedroom (because even if none of u mentions it, lets face it. we all lack "bedroom" and that gets yr nerves) and i honestly forgot why i was so mad about. we all get frustrated and whos there to take it? the other person involved, aka spouse. even if is not guilty.

so i agree with all the other opinions. give it time. at least to see if u miss him. decisions made in anger r never real, they r impulses. but shouldnt cancel the petition even if u r mad for 2 reasons. if u love him, and u know u r not visiting him because is dangerous, u want him out of there too, no? regardless to the fact u want to spend rest of yr life with him or not. and if u r so hurt that u stopped loving him, then why just cancel the petition? if u get it approved, and he gets there, u have a life time to revenge. (the last one was a joke, ofc)

hehehe...thank you for sharing....needed that to pick me up.....

[Morning Sunshine 0]

hehehe....well also I think he is thinking bad of me. He did not talk to me when hecame online today. I guess he no longer loves me.

[Morning Sunshine 0]

sweetie

at one time or another we all say something harsh to someone and I can bet you, he feels like total dogcrap for it.

I know kai and i have but if you love someone you forgive. Just take a few days to cool off and let him know what he said cut you deep and it hurt. Then say I forgive you and TRULY mean it.

I would hate to see you jump to a rash choice and then it would be to late to fix it

Ok, but he has not contacted me today at all. He said bye forever yesterday. I feel like an idiot because I am mad at him but I still been thinking about him all day. I wonder if he is thinking about me too or if he is just wishing I would disappear from his life.

If worse comes to worse, do I have to go there to get divorced?

Edited December 5, 2008 by ~Dream Love~

[KandD 1]

Im sure he is thinking of you too. He came online hoping you would say something to him first. He is testing you. To see if he can get away with it. Stand your ground girl! In a few days he will be msging you or calling asking why you havent spoke to him.

[cantwait2long 0]

sweetie

at one time or another we all say something harsh to someone and I can bet you, he feels like total dogcrap for it.

I know kai and i have but if you love someone you forgive. Just take a few days to cool off and let him know what he said cut you deep and it hurt. Then say I forgive you and TRULY mean it.

I would hate to see you jump to a rash choice and then it would be to late to fix it

Ok, but he has not contacted me today at all. He said bye forever yesterday. I feel like an idiot because I am mad at him but I still been thinking about him all day. I wonder if he is thinking about me too or if he is just wishing I would disappear from his life.

If worse comes to worse, do I have to go there to get divorced?

Mehtab,

Sometimes in life we have to learn to sit quit andwatch the storm passing away. If your hubby is angry let him be that way but you stay cool. Today is Friday go out for a movie. Treat yourself with something good.

There is light after darkness.

[Morning Sunshine 0]

Im sure he is thinking of you too. He came online hoping you would say something to him first. He is testing you. To see if he can get away with it. Stand your ground girl! In a few days he will be msging you or calling asking why you havent spoke to him.

Yes, he did eventually say he was sorry. But, not a good apology just said "I am sorry". Not sure if I accept it or not-he will have to do better than that. Anyway, he said he loved me and said he wanted a reply. By that he meant he wanted me to say I loved him back. I am not sure what else I should be expecting from him. No need to cancel the petition, I just do not feel right without him in my life. I think we can't go on without each other it would be too hard to be completely apart. My grandpa talked to him and said we both need to "grow up". Maybe grandpa is right. I know we need to communicate alot better. We will see how destiny unfolds Insha'Allah.

M.

Edited December 5, 2008 by ~Dream Love~

[cantwait2long 0]

Yes, he did eventually say he was sorry. But, not a good apology just said "I am sorry". Not sure if I accept it or not-he will have to do better than that. Anyway, he said he loved me and said he wanted a reply. By that he meant he wanted me to say I loved him back. I am not sure what else I should be expecting from him. No need to cancel the petition, I just do not feel right without him in my life. I think we can't go on without each other it would be too hard to be completely apart. My grandpa talked to him and said we both need to "grow up". Maybe grandpa is right. I know we need to communicate alot better. We will see how destiny unfolds Insha'Allah.

M.

Marriges are made in Paradise but husband and wife have to maintenance work.

Good for you. Everyone makes mistake but it is our job to correct it.

[KandD 1]

Im sure he is thinking of you too. He came online hoping you would say something to him first. He is testing you. To see if he can get away with it. Stand your ground girl! In a few days he will be msging you or calling asking why you havent spoke to him.

Yes, he did eventually say he was sorry. But, not a good apology just said "I am sorry". Not sure if I accept it or not-he will have to do better than that. Anyway, he said he loved me and said he wanted a reply. By that he meant he wanted me to say I loved him back. I am not sure what else I should be expecting from him. No need to cancel the petition, I just do not feel right without him in my life. I think we can't go on without each other it would be too hard to be completely apart. My grandpa talked to him and said we both need to "grow up". Maybe grandpa is right. I know we need to communicate alot better. We will see how destiny unfolds Insha'Allah.

M.

Im sure he does love you and he is sorry. But sweetie in a long distance relationship all he has is words. Only you know in ur heart if he is truely sorry. When he is sick or hurt you are the first person he thinks of, then the anger sets in (not towards you but the situation) cuz you cant be there to comfort him, then comes sadness and depression. One thing we always do if we have a misunderstanding is that we never get off the phone or chat upset or mad at one another we talk it out. Yes, I know how hard it is my fiance is from Paki too. It's very stressful being apart not to mention the situation over there is very tense as you already know. You dont know how many times i been told "I want to see you again before I die." or "I hope I will be alive to make it to the US." These words break my heart and I know these feelings are very real for him. I think I would be feeling the same way if I were in his shoes. By reading some of your posts sounds like to me he is wanting your attention and since the total situation is negative right now ( the situtation in Paki, the long wait for immigration, not having you by his side) he is expressing his feelings negatively. Inshallah things will get better. Try to focus on the positive things and your future together, this time will be the hardest thing both of you will have to endure Inshallah. God Bless.

[bhajishah 4]

Go online and put "busy" by your name. Dont answer him for awhile if he says salaam or hi. Pakistani men seem to like to keep thier wives on thier toes. I just go on with my business if something arises. Then when his silent treatment doesnt work and he steps up to grab you or say hi etc.. Say " I love you soo much " however"we need to talk long and hard about this thing between us.. cultural or whatever." "and dont you ever say this to me again understand. You wanna talk about racism, loook how much i get because dont really belong to either world now do I" "walk in my shoes""!.Set the ground rules and what will happen if he violates them agian..Then make up and grow closer in your unique and special union. Salaams cindi