Weird Off Topic Question for the Ladies...

[JayJay 4]

Here's an odd one for you - and I am putting this here because there are a few ladies on this forum and I'm hoping some of you ladies have had a c section and can give me a little advice...

So I had my daughter on October 10th. She died - and that is the part I am handling fine, normally and without problems (well, if you count sadness as not being a problem, which I don't as it's a normal part of grief). That part I can deal with.

Oddly enough though - here's what I am having trouble with: the incison on the c section. And here's why, I think:

I am a naturally minded person and wanted a natural birth at home in the water (which is what was happening and what was planned). Never in my life have I had surgery of any kind, been unde general anestheisa or anything of that nature. I'd always assumed I'd be able to give bith normally - and I could have (I was dilating etc - no problem with baby's head position and all that) physically etc - had I not been in danger of losing my life all of a sudden.

So now I just have this feeling like...my c section is still open. Even though it's totally closed up and I am back to normal as far as all physical aspects are concerned and have had absolutely no infection of any kind. I feel physically totally fine... But I still have this crazy feeling that in future pregnancies, the incision is going to just com open all of a sudden and all future babies are just going to kind of...fall out.

I totally don't know how to come to terms with this. I am just not really accepting this new scar on my body. Is this a normal thing? To you ladies who've had c sections out there - is this something you felt? If so, did you feel that feeling going away, or did it take you another pregnancy to get rid of it? Did the feeling ever go away? Why am I so odd!?

I dunno...thought I'd toss it out there and see what you think... (F)

[mawilson 2,133]

So now I just have this feeling like...my c section is still open. Even though it's totally closed up and I am back to normal as far as all physical aspects are concerned and have had absolutely no infection of any kind. I feel physically totally fine... But I still have this crazy feeling that in future pregnancies, the incision is going to just com open all of a sudden and all future babies are just going to kind of...fall out.

Would that be a bad thing though? Even if it happened (and it sounds unlikely), it would probably save you a lot of pain!

Unless...of course... you want to do it at home again, in which case the incision coming open would probably not work in your favour.

[Amby 490]

Ummmm...wait...it's NOT going to come open. I would discuss it with your ob/gyn if it's something that concerns you. I'm not into having babies but I think you're insane and hardcore for wanting to do natural birth

[*julez* 124]

I didn't have a C-section, but I would suggest that you talk to your doctor about your fear/concern. Doctors have heard it all and I'm sure they could help you to come to terms with this issue.

Ummmm...wait...it's NOT going to come open. I would discuss it with your ob/gyn if it's something that concerns you. I'm not into having babies but I think you're insane and hardcore for wanting to do natural birth

Natural birth is not insane at all! I think more women should try it, if a C-section isn't required.

[sara535 15]

I had an unexpected C-section also. I dont have that exact feeling that you do but I can tell you for sure that my body is TOTALLY different even a year later, in so many many ways - sometimes even now the scar burns or itches. and I know what you mean about just having a wierd feeling - I also have never had any surgeries or anything and the whole thing pretty much freaked me out. As far as future pregnancies, your fears are natural but when the time comes your body will do its job and the baby wont fall out . But yes, when its time you can certainly discuss it with a doc or midwife. the only long term physical effect is that it will give you a higher risk for future C-sections but even that is not written in stone. PM me if you want to discuss more, there are some c-section details that are just too graphic for the open board...

[Dr. Obvious 49]

What is natural about a water birth? Humans do not naturally give birth what essentially becomes a huge toilet.

I didn't have a c-section either, but I agree, you are not the same after giving birth, regardless of the matter of fetal exit. The baby would not fall out of the external scar, but there is a higher risk of uterine rupture.

Edited November 26, 2008 by Wacken

[LikeALadybug 2]

Oh, that is so funny!!! I'm sorry, I'm not really trying to laugh at you but I just imagined a baby sorta falling out...how great that would be though!

I had a planned c-section and although I have not had any kids since then, from what I understand, it's not supposed to open up on it's own..I guess anything is possible but it's not supposed to, that would be really unlucky. I think if you try and have a baby again in the near future there's a higher risk of a rapture and they will most likely recommend another c-section but I would talk to my OBG if I were you. They can explain everything a lot better and have actual facts.

My sister-in-law had a emergency c-section and she had hoped to have her 2nd. baby naturally but the doctors decided that it was safer for her to have the 2nd one by c-section even though it had been almost 5 years since her first one. I'm guessing it all really depends on the situation.

I'm sorry about your loss.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

I had an unexpected C-section also. I dont have that exact feeling that you do but I can tell you for sure that my body is TOTALLY different even a year later, in so many many ways - sometimes even now the scar burns or itches. and I know what you mean about just having a wierd feeling - I also have never had any surgeries or anything and the whole thing pretty much freaked me out. As far as future pregnancies, your fears are natural but when the time comes your body will do its job and the baby wont fall out . But yes, when its time you can certainly discuss it with a doc or midwife. the only long term physical effect is that it will give you a higher risk for future C-sections but even that is not written in stone. PM me if you want to discuss more, there are some c-section details that are just too graphic for the open board...

Same here, 'cept even 5 years later.

The baby will not fall right out. Dont feel so silly or odd for thinking that though. You just went through a huge event and tradegy.

Lisa

[JayJay 4]

Aww, thanks for your replies so far guys. I really do appreciate it. I know this feeling is totally in my head - that I do know. I'm just not really sure how to grieve for a gone-wrong birth experience. It's so weird...

And actually, a water birth is pretty natural. In many parts of the world, women will go into water to have their babies much as many other animals do as well. It feels wonderful as a form of pain relief and it's not dangerous or anything like that. The baby doesn't breathe until their faces touch the top of the water - that's when the breathing reflex kicks in. Also the idea of a giant toilet is quite funny to me because actually, amniotic fluid is created and recycled when the baby drinks the fluid in utero and then pees is back out again!

[KimandRuss 0]

I have not had a c-section but I have had 3 vaginal births and I have lost a child (congenital heart defect)... i'm very sorry for your loss.

Your body is never the same ....adapting to a new scar seems pretty normal to me.

Plenty of women have vaginal deliveries after a c-section.

[JenT 0]

I'm very sorry for your loss.... I lost three babies before I carried my oldest daughter to term.

The scar that you see is just the visible sign of the skin having been joined together.... it won't weaken during another pregnancy and open up... the skin is joined and healed together underneath what you see.

Jen

[JennaLyn 0]

first off...I'm sorry about your loss.

2nd...I have had 4 c-sections and my last one which was over 3 yrs ago now...was with twins, and they were HUGE for twins..8lbs 11oz and 9lbs 15oz..my stomach stretched beyond my wildest imagination...the day before my planned c-section I was measuring 60 wks... so my stomach stretched more then any womens body should ever stretch and my c-section scar never once even remotely came close to opening up..

My first pregnancy I was in labor for 36 hours all natural...that was 15yrs ago and I can tell you that I have forgotten how bad it hurt..ha! I have a friend who had a vbac(vaginal birth after csection) and she did fine with it. I tried for one with my 2nd child..but I just couldn't get past 8 cm's. It can happen...speak to your Dr about it when you are thinking about getting pregnant again..and good luck!!

[Reba 2]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your daughter {{{{{{hug}}}}}}}}

I had an emergency surgery years ago to remove a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, and afterward I felt for a long time that it would open up any my guts would fall out. I've had 2 surgeries since then, thru the same incision (I got the zipper cut, rather than the bikini cut, because the first surgeon was too lazy to be nice to me ) and every time for a while afterward I think everything is going to fall out. I think its fairly normal. You've suffered a tragic loss, as well as major emergency surgery, either one of those would be traumatic on its own, together though can be devestating and can play tricks with your brain for a while.

My sister has had 2 c-sections and suffered no problems with the second pregnancy one other than the usual pregnancy things. And she swelled up with blood pressure problems both times. I rather thought her ankles were going to explode, moreso than her baby falling out her incision!

I think if you give your body time to heal before you attempt to get pregnant again, you should be more than fine, and you could actually have a vaginal birth next time round. Healing from a major surgery such as c-section takes a lot longer than to heal from a vaginal birth, so please, talk to your doctor about how long is long enough to wait.

Again, I'm very sorry for your loss.

[babynursetobe 0]

First of all I must say I'm so sorry for what has happened to you.

I work in labor and delivery and I can tell you the feelings you are having are perfectly normal. I would suggest you go back to see your doctor and express your fears to them. They should take the time to assure you that will not happen. Just so you know there are several, several layers of tissues that get cut and sewn with a c-section. So not only is the outside tissue sewn back together, but so is the inside. I'm assuming you had a bikini incision and not a classical even though it sounds like it was kind of an emergency c-section?? Where I work we have many, many women who successfully vbac.......the hospital I work at is the only one in Maine that one can vbac at. I know you didn't have the birth experience you wanted the first time around, but talking with your doctor and maybe even a few counceling sessions will help you tremendously. Good luck and hope you can get past this all and feel better.

[rebeccajo 14]

20 years later, my incision area from Zachary's cesearean birth still feels slightly numb or dull.

My doctor told me there are seven layers of tissue that are incised durign the procedure. It takes some time to heal properly but is a perfectly safe way to give birth.

I think fears and concerns about future deliveries are normal and part of the mental healing process.

Regarding childbirth:

First, second or 20th birth, I would never give birth outside of a hospital setting. There is no reason to risk your life or the life of your child by clinging to archaic notions of birth at home being somehow more natural; a better bonding experience; or whatever. Childbirth, while normal, is tricky and both the mother and child are under an extreme amount of physical stress. Fetal heart monitors save the lives of babies everyday.

My son's birth started out as a normal delivery. But he never entered the birth canal. Eventually his heart rate plummeted (determined by the fetal heart monitor) and we were rushed to ER. He had swallowed his own feces (meconium) during the stress of trying to be born. Had we been attempting a birth at home, he would have died and so, possibly, might I.

I am a STRONG advocate AGAINST home births. And I have a happy, healthy 20 year old son at university as testament to that belief.