Discussing money

[mawilson 2,133]

Really? You saw Mark this weekend?

Platy, cut it out. Seriously.

[Amby 490]

Really? You saw Mark this weekend?

Platy, cut it out. Seriously.

[mawilson 2,133]

Really? You saw Mark this weekend?

Platy, cut it out. Seriously.

All circumstantial evidence points to Platy as the perpetrator of all the rumours about us.

And he fuckin keeps going at it with joke after joke, despite having been asked to stop several times.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

[PlatyPius 5]

Really? You saw Mark this weekend?

Platy, cut it out. Seriously.

All circumstantial evidence points to Platy as the perpetrator of all the rumours about us.

And he fuckin keeps going at it with joke after joke, despite having been asked to stop several times.

What?

This is like the second time I've mentioned anything even close to it.....

I really have no idea what you're talking about. What rumours? The only rumours I know of are the ones that I've HEARD - I haven't started any of them.

[Amby 490]

Really? You saw Mark this weekend?

Platy, cut it out. Seriously.

All circumstantial evidence points to Platy as the perpetrator of all the rumours about us.

And he fuckin keeps going at it with joke after joke, despite having been asked to stop several times.

Oh...

So...if I met Charles without Nessa would we be sleeping together? If I met Steven without Jinky would we be dating? What if I was friends with Rogue and met him without Carol...would I be his biker b*tch? Can't males and females be friends with each other and hang out or whatever without "dating"? Maybe I'm just from a different generation so I don't get it.

To me it's ok to be friends, have some innocent flirtation, and hang with someone of the opposite sex even if you're married. I'm a very open and accepting person and I don't see anything wrong with most things people do. Why care what someone else does unless it directly effects you.

eta: For what it's worth, I don't think it's him

Edited November 26, 2008 by Amby

[natty bumppo 297]

Its cringeworthy to me that there are still people out there who carry around door-step thick wedges of notes when they go out.

I went to breakfast last weekend with my friend and he pulled out this massive wad of cash wrapped in a rubber band to pay the bill. I thought #######? you carry that much cash but you can't afford a wallet or a money clip?

Probably compensating

he has mentioned his ####### is small

Really? You saw Mark this weekend?

It was actually a guy that followed me from LA to London and then to here because he was obsessed with me. He finally gave up and moved to Houston last weekend.

guess that counts me out since I'm not from LA and moved to Houston a few years ago ...

[morocco4ever 63]

Anyone with any brains knows this is nothing but a rumor. I can't see Platy starting anything like this. I can, however, see him teasing over it. I would never take what he says that he seriously is trying to stir Sh!t, just having fun. We all love to tease Amby. She is a great sport, tons of fun, and a real joy to have as a friend. Just blow off the ####### as morons that have nothing better to do than create drama, and realize that intelligent people can see beyond it.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

I also think that money gives certain people a feeling of superiority. Not all people with money, but some. It is THIS that causes people to dislike them, rather than the fact that they have money. People who tell those of the "classes" below them "Well why don't you just invest your money and reap the dividends?" obviously have no clue what it's like for 50% of the population who earn just enough to pay their bills, plan for retirement, and send kids to college; if they're even lucky enough to be able to plan for retirement or college. There simply isn't any money to invest. That fact seems to be lost on a lot of people. The number of people with even a savings account in the US is pretty low, really.

I have to TOTALLY agree. to say that the "other classes" should discuss money so they can LEARN how to invest and reap the benifits is so out of touch!

[SaadBell 0]

I am a poor intern, and even after all my education I will never be filthy rich, unless I marry into money, but with being married already with 5 children, men just are not that interested, I have no idea what that is about.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

GG, if you would just learn how to invest.. you could live on dividends like the rest of america. come on girl..

[Chica Yeyé 41]

GG, if you would just learn how to invest.. you could live on dividends like the rest of america. come on girl..

you ladies rawk

[Sofiyya 1,687]

The one thing clear is that the poor can be very stubborn. People who should have moved yesterday prefer to live in dilapidated areas and blame the system. People who refuse to move with the times and prefer to live like it's 1950. If the millions living in poverty actually worked together they would achieve wonders. They need to learn from the Vietnamese community who are great at working together rather than blaming the system or focusing on their circumstances. Once again learning from others is the key. Get together and clean up your street. Help each other painting and repairing their property. Work with police to get the crooks of their streets. The right attitude along with sharing knowledge and working together is the key.

There are some cultural issues here that should be considered. It isn't just stubborness or stupidity. Many cultures around the world value consensus and respect for group discussion/acceptance of ideas much more than American culture does. We tend to regard independence and individual achievement most highly. In addition there is a cultural resistance in many communities here to any sort of "help" or "guidance" from the community or government. These beliefs and cultural biases run strong and deep here. I agree that not accepting knowledge or help doesn't slow the laying of blame much.

How and whether to discuss money is definitely cultural. I'm only a few generations removed from a time when my ancestors measured wealth by how many animals, wives, children you had, how much fabric you wore, how tan from the sun you were and how much you gave to others. Your economic status and the power it gave you was well known throughout the community, so talking about it wasn't an issue. I have no qualms about money, but when you are among people who think that is crass due to their cultural upbringing, it's all too easy to be perceived as bragging.

In this society, there is no excuse for not taking advantage of wealth building opportunities. The voice in your head that says you can't do it is lying to you, and if your experience causes you to dislike others who have made it, that's your loss, not theirs because you can learn how to manage your career, money and influence better than you think.

The first thing is, you must open your mind to the idea that it can happen for you, set a goal, then seek out resources to guide you to your goal. It may be that you have to spend less time b!tching and whining on Expats or VJ, and divert your time instead to reading a few books on the subject, attending classes, learning to budget, save, and invest while resisting the latest electronic marvel or shiny, new car, but it can be done.

If you think you can't do it, you're right, you can't, but why think that if the opposite is also true? What divides the haves from the have nots in the US is that those who want more are poised to identify and take on opportunities when they find them because they have educated themselves and aren't making excuses. It's not luck that makes good things happen, it's positive ambition coupled with preparation, and those are free to anyone here.

Edited November 26, 2008 by Virtual wife

[Ban Hammer 13,575]

but who is who?

[LikeALadybug 2]

I usually only discuss money with family and close friends in which case I'm very open and so are they. We don't discuss it to brag or really advise each other as we all are in very different fields, I guess we just talk about more out of curiosity than anything. We're a nosy bunch I guess!!!

I wouldn't want to discuss it with strangers though, not so much because its tacky, unless they are bragging, but I just don;t see why they need to know.

I do think it's a little drastic to fire people over discussing salaries, although I can see why the companies don't want you to - it costs them money when half their employees find out they are getting ripped off! In the US though, it's not all about the salary and it can't always be compared. I might make a little less than someone with equal qualifications, but maybe I negotiated myself to more flextime or better benefits. You never really know over here.

But obviously its a personal thing and often cultural too it seems.