Finally we got approved yesterday

[notime4haterz 0]

I'm very sad for you....I had a boss that shared your views...we later found out she could not get pregnant, hence her venomous attitude toward babies as she reached that high risk age. I am not attacking you...just the "can't stand them" comment was a bit nasty...imagine if your mother shared that attitude...you were a baby once.

Please, no need to feel sad for me. My life is fulfilling enough without adding to the world's population!

I'm the type of person that doesn't like noise or mess. I am a neat freak. So crying, drool, and diapers just make me feel nauseated. That's why I don't like being around babies or young children.

I love travelling on a whim and spending on myself and pampering myself. I would not be able to do these things I love if I had children. Thus, my decision not to have any. As for insinuating that I'm infertile or too old to have kids...I have a good 10 years before I become high risk age. My doc has me on birth control, so I'm guessing she thinks I'm very capable of getting pregnant. The women of my family on both sides had many kids. So I don't think I'll be needing Clomid anytime soon.

[sandinista! 1,816]

tmi

i don't think she meant she feels sad about you not experiencing the loveliness of having a baby, but rather yr being the type of person that refers to human infants in a manner most people wouldn't even use to talk about dogs. which is sad. no one cares if, when, where, why, or how you breed.

[Staashi 371]

Actually, Narina...all of this doesn't matter what I make or what you make in a day or whatever. You accepted money from your husband, even if it was a bride price, and it just so happens to be a significant amount that he will have to declare to the CO and later on you both will at his AOS interview. Either one of those interviews is cause for suspicion, as they see that as a transfer of a major amount. Furthermore, you were legally divorced for only 6 months from your husband...which the feds don't go by religious dates, they go by legal dates. To them a 6 month divorce and remarriage is pretty quick. Oh, and one other thing, even though your ex has no legal standing here in the US, you previously applied for his status. Although he gave it up, you were the one who enabled him to have status in the US, thus you have a recorded history with USCIS.

Aside from that, I have dated some very wealthy men in my life, but somehow God led me to my husband. Is he rich...no. But we're rich in love, and that is what this life is all about. Is he amazing...hell yeah. Does he treat me well - you bet your Circasian ### he does. I won't ever say anything about divorce, as one can't predict the future, but I know that we've been to hell and back already...having made it thus far, I think we can handle anything else that is thrown at us and stand up to it TOGETHER! But in the end, I don't have to justify my marriage to you or to anyone else, as we justified it with God and USCIS - who at times seem to be on a level playing field...and so far, even after receiving citizenship he is still with me - guess it must be love. Which is more than I can say for some people.

Oh, and p.s. have you mentioned this whole non-childbearing issue to your hubby??? I bet he's none too pleased about that one, as I've never met one Arab man who says that they don't want children. They all typically want to have at least one, unless he's very immature and is still too young - but that just doesn't jive well with what I know...does his mama know that one? I bet she'd want her 10K and gold back.

[sandinista! 1,816]

i would think the uscis etc, would be in tune to various cultural practices from around the world when it comes to mahr, etc. i seriously doubt narina is the first and only person whose husband has ever provided that amount of cash and gold and then completed the visa process. given their circumstances, it might not raise nearly the amount of attention that it would for different people of different circumstances.

[morocco4ever 63]

And personally, I don't want a baby. Can't stand them. Don't want to have anything to do with them. Most women like babies and that's wonderful for them. Just not my forte!

It's a shame your mother didn't have the same point of view.

alright, let me show you ladies what CO limited power .

No readjudication of petitions

7. In general, an approved petition will be considered by consular officers as prima facie evidence that the requirements for classification - which are examined in the petition process - have been met. Where Congress has placed responsibility and authority with DHS to determine whether the requirements for status which are examined in the petition process have been met, consular officers do not have the authority to question the approval of petitions without specific evidence, generally unavailable to DHS at the time of petition approval, that the beneficiary may not be entitled to status (see 9 FAM 41.53, Note 2, 41.54 Note 3.2-2, 41.55 Note 8, 41.56 Note 10, 41.57 Note 6, and 42.43 Note 2) due to fraud, changes in circumstances or clear error on the part of DHS in approving the petition. Conoffs should not assume that a petition should be revoked simply because they would have reached a different decision if adjudicating the petition. …”

What does that language mean? It means an approved petition is prima facie evidence of eligibility for an immigrant visa, unless a consular officer finds substantial evidence of ineligibility. More importantly, this evidence must have been unknown and unavailable to DHS at the time it approved the petition. That is the nearly the whole game for your client right there, in a few words.

..... OK now we all see that CO can't deney you in an interview for a red flag that was knowing by DHS before they approve your I130 petition.

Mike, I think you are missinterpreting this statement. Yes, they are saying that your petition is prima facie evidence that you are eligible for that specific classification. They have determined that your I-129f/I-130 is approved, and that you are eligible for the K-3/CR1 visa. Note the word eligible, not a guarantee. Now the consulate is the deciding factor if you are eligible for the actual visa. Did you honestly think the this approval is some form of guarantee? The consulate is by far the hardest part of the entire process. They are going to be suspicious of a marriage that quick after your divorce.

One other note, the consulate is absolutely not trying to prove your marriages are valid. They are going to be looking for signs of fraud because that is their true job, to locate fraud. Any signs are going to raise suspicions. No one should feel as if theirs is going to be an easy approval. There is no substitutions for being objective and prepared.

[morocco4ever 63]

I love travelling on a whim and spending on myself and pampering myself.

Do you realize just how selfish and self centered you sound to us with statements such as these? I truly feel sorry for your husband.

[morocco4ever 63]

And personally, I don't want a baby. Can't stand them. Don't want to have anything to do with them. Most women like babies and that's wonderful for them. Just not my forte!

It's a shame your mother didn't have the same point of view.

alright, let me show you ladies what CO limited power .

No readjudication of petitions

7. In general, an approved petition will be considered by consular officers as prima facie evidence that the requirements for classification - which are examined in the petition process - have been met. Where Congress has placed responsibility and authority with DHS to determine whether the requirements for status which are examined in the petition process have been met, consular officers do not have the authority to question the approval of petitions without specific evidence, generally unavailable to DHS at the time of petition approval, that the beneficiary may not be entitled to status (see 9 FAM 41.53, Note 2, 41.54 Note 3.2-2, 41.55 Note 8, 41.56 Note 10, 41.57 Note 6, and 42.43 Note 2) due to fraud, changes in circumstances or clear error on the part of DHS in approving the petition. Conoffs should not assume that a petition should be revoked simply because they would have reached a different decision if adjudicating the petition. …”

What does that language mean? It means an approved petition is prima facie evidence of eligibility for an immigrant visa, unless a consular officer finds substantial evidence of ineligibility. More importantly, this evidence must have been unknown and unavailable to DHS at the time it approved the petition. That is the nearly the whole game for your client right there, in a few words.

..... OK now we all see that CO can't deney you in an interview for a red flag that was knowing by DHS before they approve your I130 petition.

Mike, I think you are missinterpreting this statement. Yes, they are saying that your petition is prima facie evidence that you are eligible for that specific classification. They have determined that your I-129f/I-130 is approved, and that you are eligible for the K-3/CR1 visa. Note the word eligible, not a guarantee. Now the consulate is the deciding factor if you are eligible for the actual visa. Did you honestly think the this approval is some form of guarantee? The consulate is by far the hardest part of the entire process. They are going to be suspicious of a marriage that quick after your divorce.

One other note, the consulate is absolutely not trying to prove your marriages are valid. They are going to be looking for signs of fraud because that is their true job, to locate fraud. Any signs are going to raise suspicions. No one should feel as if theirs is going to be an easy approval. There is no substitutions for being objective and prepared.

Sorry, I meant to say eligible for the category of the K3/CR1 visa.

[sereia 0]

I love travelling on a whim and spending on myself and pampering myself.

Do you realize just how selfish and self centered you sound to us with statements such as these? I truly feel sorry for your husband.

I honestly don't see what's so wrong with that statement. If she realizes she wants to travel and pamper herself and not want kids, more power to her. Not everyone should have children and I actually respect someone who doesn't just do it because of the pressure and then end up neglecting their kid because they want to do things for themselves more than be a mother or father.

I would hope she has already discussed this plan with her husband and he is okay with it to.

[Staashi 371]

And personally, I don't want a baby. Can't stand them. Don't want to have anything to do with them. Most women like babies and that's wonderful for them. Just not my forte!

It's a shame your mother didn't have the same point of view.

alright, let me show you ladies what CO limited power .

No readjudication of petitions

7. In general, an approved petition will be considered by consular officers as prima facie evidence that the requirements for classification - which are examined in the petition process - have been met. Where Congress has placed responsibility and authority with DHS to determine whether the requirements for status which are examined in the petition process have been met, consular officers do not have the authority to question the approval of petitions without specific evidence, generally unavailable to DHS at the time of petition approval, that the beneficiary may not be entitled to status (see 9 FAM 41.53, Note 2, 41.54 Note 3.2-2, 41.55 Note 8, 41.56 Note 10, 41.57 Note 6, and 42.43 Note 2) due to fraud, changes in circumstances or clear error on the part of DHS in approving the petition. Conoffs should not assume that a petition should be revoked simply because they would have reached a different decision if adjudicating the petition. …”

What does that language mean? It means an approved petition is prima facie evidence of eligibility for an immigrant visa, unless a consular officer finds substantial evidence of ineligibility. More importantly, this evidence must have been unknown and unavailable to DHS at the time it approved the petition. That is the nearly the whole game for your client right there, in a few words.

..... OK now we all see that CO can't deney you in an interview for a red flag that was knowing by DHS before they approve your I130 petition.

Mike, I think you are missinterpreting this statement. Yes, they are saying that your petition is prima facie evidence that you are eligible for that specific classification. They have determined that your I-129f/I-130 is approved, and that you are eligible for the K-3/CR1 visa. Note the word eligible, not a guarantee. Now the consulate is the deciding factor if you are eligible for the actual visa. Did you honestly think the this approval is some form of guarantee? The consulate is by far the hardest part of the entire process. They are going to be suspicious of a marriage that quick after your divorce.

One other note, the consulate is absolutely not trying to prove your marriages are valid. They are going to be looking for signs of fraud because that is their true job, to locate fraud. Any signs are going to raise suspicions. No one should feel as if theirs is going to be an easy approval. There is no substitutions for being objective and prepared.

Amen!!! Also, this is a true money-making venture for USCIS/DOS, why do you think every application is in cash, check or money order - cause they want to get paid...I've seen very few I-130s not getting approved, but I've sure heard a hell of a lot of visa denials. But to get denied a visa, one still has to pay their $130 cash. Think about it...what sits outside of any US Embassy on any given day...a Brinks truck. Chew on that.

[Staashi 371]

I love travelling on a whim and spending on myself and pampering myself.

Do you realize just how selfish and self centered you sound to us with statements such as these? I truly feel sorry for your husband.

I honestly don't see what's so wrong with that statement. If she realizes she wants to travel and pamper herself and not want kids, more power to her. Not everyone should have children and I actually respect someone who doesn't just do it because of the pressure and then end up neglecting their kid because they want to do things for themselves more than be a mother or father.

I would hope she has already discussed this plan with her husband and he is okay with it to.

As Goldie Hawn's mother said in Overboard, "But darling, if you have a baby, you won't be the baby anymore."

[morocco4ever 63]

I love travelling on a whim and spending on myself and pampering myself.

Do you realize just how selfish and self centered you sound to us with statements such as these? I truly feel sorry for your husband.

I honestly don't see what's so wrong with that statement. If she realizes she wants to travel and pamper herself and not want kids, more power to her. Not everyone should have children and I actually respect someone who doesn't just do it because of the pressure and then end up neglecting their kid because they want to do things for themselves more than be a mother or father.

I would hope she has already discussed this plan with her husband and he is okay with it to.

My thoughts weren't concerning any possible children, but rather her husband. He is the one that is going to have to ensure that she gets everything she wants. I didn't see much in that statement that included him in any way, just her desire to have everything she wants.

And personally, I don't want a baby. Can't stand them. Don't want to have anything to do with them. Most women like babies and that's wonderful for them. Just not my forte!

It's a shame your mother didn't have the same point of view.

alright, let me show you ladies what CO limited power .

No readjudication of petitions

7. In general, an approved petition will be considered by consular officers as prima facie evidence that the requirements for classification - which are examined in the petition process - have been met. Where Congress has placed responsibility and authority with DHS to determine whether the requirements for status which are examined in the petition process have been met, consular officers do not have the authority to question the approval of petitions without specific evidence, generally unavailable to DHS at the time of petition approval, that the beneficiary may not be entitled to status (see 9 FAM 41.53, Note 2, 41.54 Note 3.2-2, 41.55 Note 8, 41.56 Note 10, 41.57 Note 6, and 42.43 Note 2) due to fraud, changes in circumstances or clear error on the part of DHS in approving the petition. Conoffs should not assume that a petition should be revoked simply because they would have reached a different decision if adjudicating the petition. …”

What does that language mean? It means an approved petition is prima facie evidence of eligibility for an immigrant visa, unless a consular officer finds substantial evidence of ineligibility. More importantly, this evidence must have been unknown and unavailable to DHS at the time it approved the petition. That is the nearly the whole game for your client right there, in a few words.

..... OK now we all see that CO can't deney you in an interview for a red flag that was knowing by DHS before they approve your I130 petition.

Mike, I think you are missinterpreting this statement. Yes, they are saying that your petition is prima facie evidence that you are eligible for that specific classification. They have determined that your I-129f/I-130 is approved, and that you are eligible for the K-3/CR1 visa. Note the word eligible, not a guarantee. Now the consulate is the deciding factor if you are eligible for the actual visa. Did you honestly think the this approval is some form of guarantee? The consulate is by far the hardest part of the entire process. They are going to be suspicious of a marriage that quick after your divorce.

One other note, the consulate is absolutely not trying to prove your marriages are valid. They are going to be looking for signs of fraud because that is their true job, to locate fraud. Any signs are going to raise suspicions. No one should feel as if theirs is going to be an easy approval. There is no substitutions for being objective and prepared.

Amen!!! Also, this is a true money-making venture for USCIS/DOS, why do you think every application is in cash, check or money order - cause they want to get paid...I've seen very few I-130s not getting approved, but I've sure heard a hell of a lot of visa denials. But to get denied a visa, one still has to pay their $130 cash. Think about it...what sits outside of any US Embassy on any given day...a Brinks truck. Chew on that.

Exactly! I am in a comfortable financial situation, and I certainly didn't need dirty money, but they suspected that his sister paid me to marry him. #######, I don't need the money, why would I risk something as serious as fraud for a few thousand dollars? But they suspected it nontheless. It is unwise to assume any one is going to sail through.

[Nothing1234 2]

tmi

i don't think she meant she feels sad about you not experiencing the loveliness of having a baby, but rather yr being the type of person that refers to human infants in a manner most people wouldn't even use to talk about dogs. which is sad. no one cares if, when, where, why, or how you breed.

Exactly.

[notime4haterz 0]

Listen, I think you should all be CO's since you're all so great at accusing everyone who's not your friend, of marriage fraud!

I have ample proof that my marriage is not fraudulent...from the first and second marriage. And for those still hung up on the gold and money...puleeez!!!!! Do you know that my friend who married the Hazrabadi guy (and they got rejected by the CO)...that the CO asked "What was your dowry?" and when my friend said, "Nothing" the CO held it against her husband???? And then said, "It's part of your culture to give a dowry. Why didn't you give her a dowry? Is it because your family doesn't accept her, because she's white?" So the lack of dowry hurt them, didn't help them.

And finally, someone (Shehrezade) understood what I meant. Why have a baby? Because society thinks I should? Because someone else thinks that's what I was created for? NO thank you!

And how many women do you know that really should have never been mothers??? But they have kid after kid because that's what is expected from them...and they make lousy mothers. I know alot in this city!

Yes, I'm all about myself. I gave up the 10 best years of my life taking care of my family and my ex-husband. And I'm tired of taking care of others. My divorce was a divorce from ever having to take care of anyone again! Why tie myself down with an infant that will require, at minimum, 10 years of undivided attention?

And no, selfish is when you DO have kids, and still put yourself first. At least I'm choosing not to have them and put myself first. I'm choosing not to have something that I cannot be 100% dedicated to. THAT is the most mature way to handle it.

My husband has 4 children, grown up now, from his previous marriage. He says, "It's upto you if you want or don't want" when the subject of kids comes up. And to the person who asked about his mom...both his parents are dead. And my husband is 40 years old. I don't think he's too anxious to start up again with waking up at night for crying babies, or changing diapers. He's happy to have me spoil him instead. And I'm secure enough with him that I don't have to have a baby, hoping it will chain him to me. I don't need that at all.

Like I said, to all the women who had kids, that's wonderful! I hope it gives you the fulfillment that you hoped it would. I hope you have your kids for all time to be a source of happiness in your lives. I really do. Cause I'm not a hater! But it's just not something that would make me happy.

Anyway, I'm done justifying my position. If Mike was honest with his first wife and didn't commit fraud, then I congratulate him and wish him better luck on his first marriage. And how do we know? Maybe his first wife is the one that married him for money and then divorced him after he got his status. You're only assuming it was all his fault. 75% of divorces in America are initiated by the wife. If he used the first wife and left her in a bad situation, then I don't have to hate on him because God will take care of everything and it will come back on him.

THE END

[notime4haterz 0]

i would think the uscis etc, would be in tune to various cultural practices from around the world when it comes to mahr, etc. i seriously doubt narina is the first and only person whose husband has ever provided that amount of cash and gold and then completed the visa process. given their circumstances, it might not raise nearly the amount of attention that it would for different people of different circumstances.

Thank you

I honestly don't see what's so wrong with that statement. If she realizes she wants to travel and pamper herself and not want kids, more power to her. Not everyone should have children and I actually respect someone who doesn't just do it because of the pressure and then end up neglecting their kid because they want to do things for themselves more than be a mother or father.

I would hope she has already discussed this plan with her husband and he is okay with it to.

Thank you

I guess we're both "immature and selfish" because we take great pleasure in pleasing and spoiling each other. Focusing our undivided attention on each other, and loving only each other. And how terrible of us to want to travel the world together and experience life together! Smells fraudulent, indeed!

Edited November 23, 2008 by narina77

[Nothing1234 2]

Again, not my point. I'm very happy you have chosen to not have children. Enjoy traveling.