Need urgent suggestion!

[korat2michigan 0]

Today I just heard the shocked news from my friend about her problem. She hardly speaks it out 'til it's at the dead end. Then she opens her mouth!! I hope it's not too late for her to solve all this trouble. Her husband wants to divorce. He refused to sign the paper for AOS to remove conditional 2 yrs GC 'til it's expired at the beginning of this month. He said he will divorce certainly but not now. He wants to send her back home first and then apply for the divorce later after she is away from him for 3 months. He did exactly the same thing with his ex-wife!! He said if she doesn't go back, he will call the police because her GC was expired. She is unemployed and no savings to hire the lawyer. She doesn't want to go back home. Is there any way to help her with this issue??...

After I heard this story, I don't want to find out whose fault it is. Hope neither do u. But I try to find the good solution for her instead.

Thanks for all helpful suggestion!!

Edited November 20, 2008 by korat2michigan

[Oosie 1]

If she looks in the phone book or online for her local Catholic Social Services she shouldbe able to get good legal advice about her immigration problem. This won't help with her husband wanting a divorce, she will need to do that seperately. She needs to be divorced to file to remove conditions by herself and will have to prove she entered the marriage in good faith. She can start now getting together all the papers she can find at home that show there was a good faith marriage. Everything she can find that shows them living as man and wife will be useful to her. She may need to taslk seperatley to a divorcelawyer ormay be able to file for divorce without a lawyer. If she can prove he tried to send her home that might help her prove her case.

The immigration lawyers at Catholic Social Services help anyone, Catholic or not, and they don't charge a lot, I think they may have a sliding scale.

Depending on her state her husband may have to pay her alimony, even if he doesn't he did sign an affidavit of support and he can be held to that. That's clearly why he wants her out of thecountry.

[korat2michigan 0]

Thank you Oosie. I will find out more info about the service you suggested. Now some of my friends and I start to give our hands to her. We talk about money collection to hire the lawyer...and also search for more about the Divorce Law, low cost legal service and safe places for her to stay in case the situation is worst. ( We are willing to offer her a place but not sure if that will be illegal? If not, we will keep thinking about this and make the schedule so she can move around to live with our friends while her divorce process is going.) Her husband cuts her chance to access the internet right now. So we can reach her at mobile only but...maybe no longer..cuz he will not pay the bill. We told one friend who lives not far from her to print out some info so that she can read and know what to do next. Fortunately, there're still some ways out there to solve the problem. But it just starts!!

Edited November 20, 2008 by korat2michigan

[Ngoc-Anh 1]

Thank you Oosie. I will find out more info about the service you suggested. Now some of my friends and I start to give our hands to her. We talk about money collection to hire the lawyer...and also search for more about the Divorce Law, low cost legal service and safe places for her to stay in case the situation is worst. ( We are willing to offer her a place but not sure if that will be illegal? If not, we will keep thinking about this and make the schedule so she can move around to live with our friends while her divorce process is going.) Her husband cuts her chance to access the internet right now. So we can reach her at mobile only but...maybe no longer..cuz he will not pay the bill. We told one friend who lives not far from her to print out some info so that she can read and know what to do next. Fortunately, there're still some ways out there to solve the problem. But it just starts!!

If she can proof that she entered the marriage in good faith, then she can remove the condition on her own without her husband.

Wish her the best of luck!

[MihaelaNYS 10]

1. She should get all the bills (old and recent date), credit cards, bank accounts, or any other document that has both their names on it (or individualy but show the same address) income tax returns, insurance cards, pictures, copies after his passport, birth certificate, diploma anything that would proof a strong close relation between them. Gather all this and put them in a safe place (safe deposit box at the bank).

2. Get a digital voice recorder and try to get him to say what he does, did and why and/or get a friend of hers to talk to him and get this information. The friend can write an affidavit of what he heard and can be used as witness.

3. The Catholic Charities is a good idea to contact a lawyer.

4. Get in touch with a women shelter (for battered women) they have counselors and advocates that help.

Dont need to get a divorce lawyer yet. As long as she stays married to the USC she definitely has writes. She can file or build her case as an abused spouse.

The fact that he uses his status as citizen to control her life and her future is abuse. He should have more respect and consideration for his wife.

In three years of marriage she can become a citizen.

[MihaelaNYS 10]

Even the threat regarding a police arrest should be recorded and documented. Threats, blackmails, insults have no place in a marriage. She needs to prove what he does and acts like. After that should consider hiring a divorce lawyer....

The police will not arrest the wife because the husband says she is an illegal immigrant. First of all, she is his wife.

Further more, she can go to the police and ask them to take her statement. They have to, if requested.

In her statement she will describe her husband's threats and blackmail. This is called documenting the case. The Police will take her statement and give her a copy of it. This will help her proof what happened and especially when (as the document will have the date on it).

Dont be affraid, it is not Police's job to arrest USC`s spouses.

Only if she commits a crime will be arrested. Right now, the criminal is her husband, not her. She needs evidence. Threatening the wife is considered domestic violence.

She can even call the cops on him and have him arrested for making her feel unsafe in her own house. Since they are married, his house is her house too.

She has rights. He cannot just kick her out. He wants her to go/run away because that's the easyest way for him to get read of her.

It will look as if she abandoned him. That's what he wants.

Don't delay getting an immigration attorney.

[korat2michigan 0]

HappyOne, MihaelaNYS,

A bunch of thanks with your suggestions. I will let her know about this too. Luckily she can use the internet from the library sometimes so she can read all these suggestion from her e-mail. Let's see what we can help her. Now I see that we can use the police service...It might be a good idea. Not only shut down the internet modem, he also holds the gun in the house too. I heard that they make agreement to divorce next week. Hope it will OK if he keeps his words to do that.

[MihaelaNYS 10]

,,Now I see that we can use the police service...It might be a good idea. "

- I am an abused (immigrant) spouse, all that I recommended her to do is what I learned from my own experience.

I have a counselor with an organization that helps abused women and also I learned what to do from their advocates and lawyers (that I paid for).

..... I`ve been there, done that. ....

The USC husband played the same triks on me. He did everything he could to chase me out of the house and the next thing I know, he went to the police and reported me missing..... He played he ,,victim,, part. ...

So, if she does what I suggested, she'll manage to turn the situation in her favor and solve it.

,,Not only shut down the internet modem, he also holds the gun in the house too. ''

- good ! the police will ask her if there are any guns in the house when she'll go to give them a statement. She has to describe the picture: she is in danger, isolated, under threats from her husband - the person who swore to take care of her, love her, respect, cherish ..... obviously words dont mean a thing for him. ... so, speaking of wich...

"I heard that they make agreement to divorce next week. Hope it will OK if he keeps his words to do that."

No, don't trust his words. Obviously, he is the enemy; he tried to screw her by not jointly petition for removal of temporary condition on her GC, indangering her future here.

I wouldnt jump to divorce him so quickly!

Get the evidence on abuse first and the priority for her is to get an immigration lawyer because she is/will be put in deportation soon (if her GC expired).

I know is very tough on her, she wants to get away from him because he's making her life miserable. It is time to play smart! As long as she is living with him, if he does anything against her, she can and have to have him arrested. Keep the digital recorder on her at all times but make sure he doesnt know or notice it. Get a cell phone of her own (for emergency cases).

If he gets physically violent with her, call the police, he'll be arrested, press charges, then she will have an order of protection against him. He'll have to move out and stay away from her. Then she can file for divorce and stand a good chance of getting it.

If he really decide to sign a divorce so easy and soon, that's fine, but make sure he will give her an affidavit / letter stating their marriage was for real and things just didnt work out between them and they decided to go their own ways.

Good luck!

[Old Dominion 26]

It seems that it will be OK for one of her friends to offer shelter until all this gets worked out. She is legally in the U.S., can get the conditions removed on her GC because the marriage was already determined to be bona fide, and with the help of Legal Aid or Catholic Charities can get her life up and running again. She can get a job. The local police are never involved in enforcing U.S. immigration laws. Immigration lacks the staff to pursue this kind of deportation.

[MihaelaNYS 10]

"It seems that it will be OK for one of her friends to offer shelter until all this gets worked out. "

- Yes, but only if she chooses to, then she should file for divorce, otherwise she will be at fault dor abandoning her family (husband). In NY is ground for divorce. He can claim abandonment.

"The local police are never involved in enforcing U.S. immigration laws."

- True, the Immigration has its own enforcement squad.... if she didnt do any crime, the local police will help.

" Immigration lacks the staff to pursue this kind of deportation."

- True too, but the point is, if she wants to maintain her legal status, she should play by the rules and proof what happened. It is easy to don't mind/ignore the legal issues and run around freely in this country... but that's what she wants ? To become an illegal alien ?! I think it would be too bad not to put up a fight and get the legal status back on the track.

[korat2michigan 0]

Thanks again for additional info...

I also have questions about this issue if you will kindly suggest me more.

1. If she doesn't have any financial statement to show when she files I 751 with a waiver, will that be a problem??

2. She wants to look for job (but her GC was expired). Should she keep going or wait til the divorce is finalized and get NOA 1 after filing I 751?

3. We talk about her hardship to find a job so one of my friend suggests that we should send her money checks to her bank account. So she can show that she has the income. ...I don't think so. I think her income should be paid for the tax too...from the authorized employers not from us. Am I right??

4. As first we think when she files the divorce , she will move around to stay with friends. It might not be a good idea now if she has to look for a job. As each friends don't live near the others. We never know if she will get a job or not. She has tried n tried n tired before since the GC was valid. In the reality if she stays with only one friend too long, it might make friend and family feel uncomfortable too. We want to help but we also don't want to be like the blind helps the deaf.

Edited November 23, 2008 by korat2michigan

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Shouldn't be an issue at all. The I-864 provided by her US citizen sponsor is still in place.

Is she has no legal status, then she has no ability to work. However, once the I-751 NOA is received it extends her status as a PR, regardless of any expiry date on the green card. She would then be work authorised.

Thanks again for additional info...

I also have questions about this issue if you will kindly suggest me more.

1. If she doesn't have any financial statement to show when she files I 751 with a waiver, will that be a problem??

2. She wants to look for job (but her GC was expired). Should she keep going or wait til the divorce is finalized and get NOA 1 after filing I 751?

3. We talk about her hardship to find a job so one of my friend suggests that we should send her money checks to her bank account. So she can show that she has the income. ...I don't think so. I think her income should be paid for the tax too...from the authorized employers not from us. Am I right??

4. As first we think when she files the divorce , she will move around to stay with friends. It might not be a good idea now if she has to look for a job. As each friends don't live near the others. We never know if she will get a job or not. She has tried n tried n tired before since the GC was valid. In the reality if she stays with only one friend too long, it might make friend and family feel uncomfortable too. We want to help but we also don't want to be like the blind helps the deaf.

[korat2michigan 0]

.......I know is very tough on her, she wants to get away from him because he's making her life miserable. It is time to play smart! As long as she is living with him, if he does anything against her, she can and have to have him arrested. Keep the digital recorder on her at all times but make sure he doesnt know or notice it. Get a cell phone of her own (for emergency cases).

If he gets physically violent with her, call the police, he'll be arrested, press charges, then she will have an order of protection against him. He'll have to move out and stay away from her. Then she can file for divorce and stand a good chance of getting it.

If he really decide to sign a divorce so easy and soon, that's fine, but make sure he will give her an affidavit / letter stating their marriage was for real and things just didnt work out between them and they decided to go their own ways.

Good luck!

MihaelaNYS,

What an affidavit/letter is? It's only the letter we can prepare for him to sign or it's an affidavit form somewhere...

[korat2michigan 0]

Shouldn't be an issue at all. The I-864 provided by her US citizen sponsor is still in place.

Is she has no legal status, then she has no ability to work. However, once the I-751 NOA is received it extends her status as a PR, regardless of any expiry date on the green card. She would then be work authorised.

Thanks diaddie mermaid,

I am not sure if I understand correctly or not "The I-864 provided by her US citizen sponsor is still in place". It means she doesn't need to file it with I 751 because immigration will use his old forms?? Right?

[MihaelaNYS 10]

"What an affidavit/letter is? It's only the letter we can prepare for him to sign or it's an affidavit form somewhere...".

It's his statement (sure, you can write it and have him sign it) about his marriage (for love) and how things just didnt worked out and they agreed to go separate ways.

The point is that whoever reads it to see that it was a true marital relationship, not a deal/business/fraud).