Mahr - What Determines Worth?

[Y's_habibitk 2]

I also understand that you were p*ssed if someone made a comment about your wife. However, carrying it on and on is just unecessary. Bringing your cronies onboard is also uncool IMHO.

It's like watching a mad highschooler get all of his friends, then get a mob mentality going and standing back laughing.

Hopefully everyone can chill out and stop the bashing. Im a little ashamed that some of the women on this board so freely drew out their claws and got to "mobbn" also.

Lisa

For the record, I didn't bring anyone over, nor did I ask them to take up the torch. There was already a topic at Expats about that thread, so I posted about the latest in there as a means to rant and curse and complain. If people felt the desire to come over to VJ and post their feelings about it, that's entirely up to them. I didn't recruit them.

Come on, you know you put up a billboard.

[Staashi 371]

I am trying to explain that I'm not in a situation where the greencard is an issue.

Actually, you are. You put yourself in the greencard issue as soon as you and your husband decided that he wanted to come to the US to live with you. I don't care if he's part of the VWP, he still has to have a greencard to reside in the US. He can travel to the US, hang out with you, but he can't work or earn any type of living.

So now, you're just like everyone else. Welcome to our world of waiting around for NOAs, interviews with DOS and USCIS, welcome to finding out how your life will hang in the balance when it is at the mercy of some immigration bureaucrat who just so happens to be loaded up with a thousand other cases. I'm fortunate that my husband is all done with this and became a USC in July, but I still support all the men and women here who continue to walk the line. And your husband might have brothers who are USCs, but he wouldn't be eligible for an I-130 for about a good 11 years because of the orders of sponsorship. So, welcome to the fight. Your hubby may or may not have needed a greencard for him to stay in the Netherlands and make a little US bootycall, but he sure as hell will need one to maneuver through the good ole US of A. Good luck with that. You're gonna need it.

You're assuming my husband needs to work. But if I say he doesn't need to work, you'll all call me a snob. So I'm not going to justify my position on the greencard issue anymore. He's had the ability to come here 20 years ago when he was a young boy. He chose not to come because he liked Europe better. Yes, we have to wait for the I-130 so that he doesn't have to leave every 90 days. In the mean time, I visit him every other month. While the wait is long and frustrating, I try to see the positive side of things. I focus on the good part of being able to see him often, rather than only the bad part of being away from him.

And you're assuming that the VWP will always be in use, which you never know how things will shake out with that and which countries will be eligible in the future. When he had the chance to come 20 years ago he was a boy, now that he's over 21 years old, things change and his eligibility is based on a family-based visa through you. It's just the way things are.

[Ban Hammer 13,345]

aha, so the "coochie" comment was a comeback.. i thought thats what i remembered. But, being the kind hearted person that i am, ha! i gave the benefit of the doubt.

i would like to point out that as a expert cunning linguist, a golden cootchie is a compliment whereas a rotten cootchie isn't

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

aha, so the "coochie" comment was a comeback.. i thought thats what i remembered. But, being the kind hearted person that i am, ha! i gave the benefit of the doubt.

i would like to point out that as a expert cunning linguist, a golden cootchie is a compliment whereas a rotten cootchie isn't

as in she thinks her member is made of gold

[notime4haterz 0]

Hanginginthere, I posted the picture in jest to all the people that got mad at me because I accepted a mahr and also displayed it and talked about it to those who were bashing me. In my culture we display it on a pretty pillow at the wedding. In our culture it's not considered tacky or vulgar. It's expected to be displayed.

As for the hair, why do you think my hair is bleached? Perhaps you aren't familiar with my background. I'm Circassian and we are fair haired, fair skinned, and sometimes light eyed. Perhaps you thought I was Arab. Alot of people assume that.

As for my looks, I really don't care whether people here think I'm beautiful or not. I already know what my husband thinks, what his family and our people think of my looks. I know how I'm treated walking down the street in Cairo, Istanbul, or in Marrakesh. People can trash me and call me ugly all they want. They can think it, but for every person here that feels that way, there are million others that would disagree.

So I hope you're not too insulted by the picture. It's a personal joke.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

I am trying to explain that I'm not in a situation where the greencard is an issue.

Actually, you are. You put yourself in the greencard issue as soon as you and your husband decided that he wanted to come to the US to live with you. I don't care if he's part of the VWP, he still has to have a greencard to reside in the US. He can travel to the US, hang out with you, but he can't work or earn any type of living.

So now, you're just like everyone else. Welcome to our world of waiting around for NOAs, interviews with DOS and USCIS, welcome to finding out how your life will hang in the balance when it is at the mercy of some immigration bureaucrat who just so happens to be loaded up with a thousand other cases. I'm fortunate that my husband is all done with this and became a USC in July, but I still support all the men and women here who continue to walk the line. And your husband might have brothers who are USCs, but he wouldn't be eligible for an I-130 for about a good 11 years because of the orders of sponsorship. So, welcome to the fight. Your hubby may or may not have needed a greencard for him to stay in the Netherlands and make a little US bootycall, but he sure as hell will need one to maneuver through the good ole US of A. Good luck with that. You're gonna need it.

You're assuming my husband needs to work. But if I say he doesn't need to work, you'll all call me a snob. So I'm not going to justify my position on the greencard issue anymore. He's had the ability to come here 20 years ago when he was a young boy. He chose not to come because he liked Europe better. Yes, we have to wait for the I-130 so that he doesn't have to leave every 90 days. In the mean time, I visit him every other month. While the wait is long and frustrating, I try to see the positive side of things. I focus on the good part of being able to see him often, rather than only the bad part of being away from him.

And you're assuming that the VWP will always be in use, which you never know how things will shake out with that and which countries will be eligible in the future. When he had the chance to come 20 years ago he was a boy, now that he's over 21 years old, things change and his eligibility is based on a family-based visa through you. It's just the way things are.

the euro is way down now....its 1.27..dollars on its way up

[Y's_habibitk 2]

aha, so the "coochie" comment was a comeback.. i thought thats what i remembered. But, being the kind hearted person that i am, ha! i gave the benefit of the doubt.

i would like to point out that as a expert cunning linguist, a golden cootchie is a compliment whereas a rotten cootchie isn't

not in the context it was used, nice try though charles lol

[Amby 490]

Mahr? Bill Mahr?

that's what I first thought when I saw this thread and then I started to read and decided I was wrong and so are you

[Y's_habibitk 2]

Hanginginthere, I posted the picture in jest to all the people that got mad at me because I accepted a mahr and also displayed it and talked about it to those who were bashing me. In my culture we display it on a pretty pillow at the wedding. In our culture it's not considered tacky or vulgar. It's expected to be displayed.

As for the hair, why do you think my hair is bleached? Perhaps you aren't familiar with my background. I'm Circassian and we are fair haired, fair skinned, and sometimes light eyed. Perhaps you thought I was Arab. Alot of people assume that.

As for my looks, I really don't care whether people here think I'm beautiful or not. I already know what my husband thinks, what his family and our people think of my looks. I know how I'm treated walking down the street in Cairo, Istanbul, or in Marrakesh. People can trash me and call me ugly all they want. They can think it, but for every person here that feels that way, there are million others that would disagree.

So I hope you're not too insulted by the picture. It's a personal joke.

and its pretty d*mn funny!

[Ban Hammer 13,345]

aha, so the "coochie" comment was a comeback.. i thought thats what i remembered. But, being the kind hearted person that i am, ha! i gave the benefit of the doubt.

i would like to point out that as a expert cunning linguist, a golden cootchie is a compliment whereas a rotten cootchie isn't

not in the context it was used, nice try though charles lol

no linguistic skills offered to rotten cootchie, but golden ones move to the head of the line

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Hanginginthere, I posted the picture in jest to all the people that got mad at me because I accepted a mahr and also displayed it and talked about it to those who were bashing me. In my culture we display it on a pretty pillow at the wedding. In our culture it's not considered tacky or vulgar. It's expected to be displayed.

As for the hair, why do you think my hair is bleached? Perhaps you aren't familiar with my background. I'm Circassian and we are fair haired, fair skinned, and sometimes light eyed. Perhaps you thought I was Arab. Alot of people assume that.

As for my looks, I really don't care whether people here think I'm beautiful or not. I already know what my husband thinks, what his family and our people think of my looks. I know how I'm treated walking down the street in Cairo, Istanbul, or in Marrakesh. People can trash me and call me ugly all they want. They can think it, but for every person here that feels that way, there are million others that would disagree.

So I hope you're not too insulted by the picture. It's a personal joke.

well i got hit on pregnant overseas....people masturbate to sheep in some villages...i dont consider the streets as a litmus test

you are cute though...i just wouldnt take cat calls as a referendum on looks

[Y's_habibitk 2]

ok, im replying to 184698 posts at once.. im getting overstimmed, i need to go take a break in another forum LOL

[notime4haterz 0]

LOOOOL I think I'm getting tired now...Yeah Charles, I suppose the golden coochie thing can be a compliment. But depends where it's coming from. I also got called Queen...I guess I should take that as a compliment as well.

Darn! I had a pic of me in a crown once, as a joke. I need to find it and replace my gold picture w/a crown picture. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

[notime4haterz 0]

well i got hit on pregnant overseas....people masturbate to sheep in some villages...i dont consider the streets as a litmus test

you are cute though...i just wouldnt take cat calls as a referendum on looks

I don't know quite what to say to this post LOOOOOOOOOOOOL Poor sheep!

Okay, I'm really tired now and I have to wake up at 5am. I think it's time for bed. And here I thought I was gonna jump on here for 5 mins only. LOOOOOOOOOL

[nunyab 0]

LOL... reminds me when i was told about our "marriage contract"...lol, I won't talk about it but it cracks me up everytime