Wife was invited to a co-workers Wedding Shower.

[Sister Fracas 5]

I never had a regular shower because of the wedding being in Engerland, but my co-workers threw a shower for me, and I was TOTALLY overwhelmed by their generosity. I received many nice things and I DO think about the people who gave them to me when I use them.

Never had the need for a baby shower... lol whew!

[jundp 191]

I never see baby showers as a formal "gift grab." Considering friends or family generally organize these events without the direction of the mother or father, how could it be seen as such? Maybe I just come from a very very different area. The parents of the baby would never organize a shower and then tell people what to bring. And it's never expected and in my experience (personally and with friends/family) everyone is always incredibly grateful for the generosity.

*shrugs* guess I just never gave baby showers much thought. Don't see a problem with them at all. If i thought the person was being materialistic, I probably wouldn't attend...

[Dr. Obvious 49]

For the first baby, I might agree with you. For the subsequent ones, I begin to seriously question the necessity. Also in my experience, infants need very little besides clothes, diapers, and maybe a carseat. Everything else is just not all that necessary or you only find the necessity after you have already had the baby, not before. Like maybe you might want a sling, but you should borrow it instead of buying it at first to see if your kid even likes it.

Pretty much everything my daughter had the first year of her life was used besides the Baby Bjoern. In retrospect, we should have gotten that used too. She did not have her own room and slept in the kitchen. Guess what? She's fine despite not having 90% of the ####### you just HAVE TO HAVE to have with an infant. With that in mind, baby showers are not really necessary either. Plus, the games are absolutely embarassing and make me die a little inside.

Edited November 17, 2008 by Wacken

[NickD 203]

Do not take this wrong, please. Was so happy to marry my wife, I wanted a large reception to share my joy with my family and friends. Parents are dead, I footed the bill. And the bills did roll in, especially that bar bill. I totaled the price, but just couldn't help also totaling up the gifts we received, wife said I was terrible, LOL.

No, not terrible, just curious, but from my own wedding reception and others, can only say, do not have a wedding reception for a profit. Don't understand some of these kids going $25,000.00 in debt when they don't even have a bed to sleep on.

When my daughter got married to a doctor that is the son of a doctor, his father wanted to invite over one hundred doctors, we agreed on a compromise as the brides old man is expected to pick up the tab. At 50 bucks a plate or a hundred bucks a couple, average gift was around twenty bucks. That sure wasn't a profit making adventure.

When I am invited, feel obligated to at least cover the cost of the meal plus a couple of extra bucks. I know what it feels like.

Baby showers can be awkward if you bring in a second hand diaper and someone else brings in an 800 buck crib as an example.

[Dr. Obvious 49]

I just don't see the need for extravagant weddings either nor do I feel the need to subsidize someone's dream wedding. Between 1200-1300 euros was spent on my wedding. It lasted three days and people still talk about it as one of the best things they have ever been to. So many things that you are conditioned to believe are necessary just aren't. All marketing.

[DeadPoolX 9]

Wedding showers hold very little practical use today, so it's more of a tradition (much like a bachelor party) than anything else. However, in in the past, a wedding shower originated from the concept of a bride's dowry. If the woman was too poor to effectively provide a dowry to her future husband (because her family lacked the funds or her father refused to give her a dowry as a statement of his disapproval), the woman's friends would "shower her with gifts" to compensate for the lack of a pure monetary dowry.

Obviously, this tradition is old and quite outdated today. But people like to hold on to traditions, whether or not they make much sense in a modern environment.

[Sister Fracas 5]

Baby showers can be awkward if you bring in a second hand diaper and someone else brings in an 800 buck crib as an example.

It sure CAN be awkward if one were to bring a second hand diaper....

[*JG* 2]

In my experience, the thing with wedding showers and baby showers (whether for first, second, third babies) is that it was never up to me. My friends and family planned, prepared, and surprised me with them. I seriously didn't think I needed anything. I didn't register for anything. I didn't expect a shower. It was more for my mother and my family to do this for me then for me to demand some sort of a shower.

[Laura+Tom 2]

I don't think we even have bridal or baby showers in the UK. Just Hen and Stag nights, where you might get some gifts. I used to work on an American base here and was asked if I'd like to go to a baby shower. She had to explain to me what one was.

[Sister Fracas 5]

In my experience, the thing with wedding showers and baby showers (whether for first, second, third babies) is that it was never up to me. My friends and family planned, prepared, and surprised me with them. I seriously didn't think I needed anything. I didn't register for anything. I didn't expect a shower. It was more for my mother and my family to do this for me then for me to demand some sort of a shower.

People want to give couples and expecting mums gifts. I wouldn't want anyone to feel obligated to give something, but if they want to, what's the problem if it makes them happy to think that they have given something either special or greatly needed in the case of baby showers?

[chri'stina 190]

In my experience, the thing with wedding showers and baby showers (whether for first, second, third babies) is that it was never up to me. My friends and family planned, prepared, and surprised me with them. I seriously didn't think I needed anything. I didn't register for anything. I didn't expect a shower. It was more for my mother and my family to do this for me then for me to demand some sort of a shower.

People want to give couples and expecting mums gifts. I wouldn't want anyone to feel obligated to give something, but if they want to, what's the problem if it makes them happy to think that they have given something either special or greatly needed in the case of baby showers?

It's true that a baby shower is greatly appreciated and after having one and the baby, I know what are the better things to give an expecting mom rather than other things.

[Mononoke28 135]

I say, if you want to shower me with something, shower me with $100 bills; Soprano style. Other than that, don't bother.

Diana