Email message

[sweet_peach 0]

Damnit...he wrote me several emails...

I have asked him so many questions but he only says that I should still wait some hours and then he will tell me...=S

He told me that he did not cheat on me so that made me a bit happier but when I asked him if he still loves me and if he still wants me to come he did not answer....he just ignored it.

I have never seen him that selfish...=(

Maybe he is being deployed....

[coria1988 0]

Okay I have talked to him now but he had to go back to work.

He told me that he is hurt and is sorry but he has to figure out what his heart is telling him.

He is so confused and I just have to wait and wait and wait until he tells me if he still loves me or not.

He told me that I was the greatest woman and that he was really sorry and just did not know what is

going on...but I do not either and I just have to wait.

To wait for an answer whether he still loves me or not...= (

[English Muffin 59]

OMG, I'm so sorry.

When were you planning on moving to the US? According to your timeline it looks like you have your visa already.

I hope everything works out ok for you, I really do.

[coria1988 0]

Thank you ; )

I really do hope so too.

It is horrible waiting for an answer....

I should get my visa this week I think.

I planned on going there in January.

[MrsRowe 2]

Aww, i am so sorry.

[KAT&Allie 0]

Hi Coria,

I know you are not going to like me much for what I have to say but I am not at all impressed by his behaviour. Shame on him for putting you through this. OK, fair enough, I can understand being scared of making the right decision and especially now the time for you to be together is approaching fast. But what he should have done is to sort himself out, find the answers he's searching for and then tell you. It is unkind, to put it mildly, of him to keep you hanging on like that. You have feelings too and it must be absolutely devastating to know that he has doubts whether he loves you or not. I so feel for you and can't tell you how sorry I am you are going through this. He can count himself lucky that I don't know him... he needs to learn how to be more considerate and respectful of other people and their feelings. After all, you should be the most important person to him. Even, G-d forbid, it comes to that that he says he's not sure he can go through this with you; he should have been more compassionate about the whole situation. I am sorry but this whole situation is making me so mad and sad at the same time... We can't make somebody love us...

I sincerely hope both of you will learn from this and that this situation will resolve itself for the best. Wishing you the very best.

Okay I have talked to him now but he had to go back to work.

He told me that he is hurt and is sorry but he has to figure out what his heart is telling him.

He is so confused and I just have to wait and wait and wait until he tells me if he still loves me or not.

He told me that I was the greatest woman and that he was really sorry and just did not know what is

going on...but I do not either and I just have to wait.

To wait for an answer whether he still loves me or not...= (

[smiley888 0]

im so sorry to hear that, i know how u feel its hard realy hard... but i guess u should read between the lines.. he sounds breaking up with you and avoiding you now... (been with that) and i thanked God so much i am with my true love now.. God has a reason for that.. But anyways continue praying for the best ok for Godswill.. take care

[SunDrop 59]

he needs to learn how to be more considerate and respectful of other people and their feelings.

He's a soldier. With respect to Coria, soldiers are trained to be unemotional and detached. A good soldier will view anyone who is not a colleague as a civilian. His role is to serve to defend and protect. Not love.

Okay I have talked to him now but he had to go back to work.

He told me that he is hurt and is sorry but he has to figure out what his heart is telling him.

He is so confused and I just have to wait and wait and wait until he tells me if he still loves me or not.

He told me that I was the greatest woman and that he was really sorry and just did not know what is

going on...but I do not either and I just have to wait.

To wait for an answer whether he still loves me or not...= (

It's anguish, no doubt. But it sounds like he's getting cold feet. It doesn't mean that he doesn't love you, but the distance is serving to 'help' the detachment. I'm not sure how "he's hurt".

Why are you waiting until January? How easy is it for you to go and see. It would need to be under the understanding that at the end of the 3 months, you might not marry but you've got to remember if he's active military, he's in an extremely macho environment. There's a lot of pressure to be 'one of the boys' and to 'let loose and live free'. If he's experiencing a lot of peer-pressure to not get married and settle down and why with a foreign girl when there's so many lovely american ones, the distance might be helping him to truly question the 'why are we doing this?'

Only you know him well enough amongst us, but if I were you, I'd do what I could to move my arrival forward and ask for the opportunity to try being together and seeing after 3 months how he feels then.

Hugs, you certainly need them!

Tish

[coria1988 0]

He's a soldier. With respect to Coria, soldiers are trained to be unemotional and detached. A good soldier will view anyone who is not a colleague as a civilian. His role is to serve to defend and protect. Not love.

But he DID LOVE me and I am sure about that!!! Why do you say he does not love just because he is a soldier? =S

Why are you waiting until January? How easy is it for you to go and see. It would need to be under the understanding that at the end of the 3 months, you might not marry but you've got to remember if he's active military, he's in an extremely macho environment. There's a lot of pressure to be 'one of the boys' and to 'let loose and live free'. If he's experiencing a lot of peer-pressure to not get married and settle down and why with a foreign girl when there's so many lovely american ones, the distance might be helping him to truly question the 'why are we doing this?'

I wanted to go there earlier but he says that he would have to save up money and now he just wants to figure out his feelings - by himself unfortunately...

Why do you say that he might want an american girl?

Hmm, well I do not think that....I have felt that he really loved me up to now, but he also said that he would not take another girl if he did not have me no more. I know it all sounds very confusing and it is.

Why would he think now "why are we doing this" when we will receive the visa in a week? Nah, I do not think so...; )

[English Muffin 59]

He's a soldier. With respect to Coria, soldiers are trained to be unemotional and detached. A good soldier will view anyone who is not a colleague as a civilian. His role is to serve to defend and protect. Not love.

I'm sorry but that's cr@p! I was a soldier for eight years but I would never have behaved the way this guy is. I am also a very emotional person (always have been) and have never lost the ability to love. I was a good soldier too!

[Cham 3]

I hope you are doing okay. I just saw this and I am in shock.

I have to agree with one of the posters. I think he is trying to break up with you and does not know how to:(

I hope and pray it is not that, BUT be prepared.

HUGS!

meri

[Gemmie 142]

The thing about not being able to love because he's a soilder isn't accurate at all, in my opinion. Granted, I have no experience as a soilder but I do as a human being, and I also know people that have become soilders. They miss their loved ones more than anything. They don't see their family as just "civilians", they are not robots.

I'm sorry to hear you're going through this.. hopefully soon he'll be straight with you and get his feelings worked out so that you can both either be happy together or accept that it's not going to happen. I wish you the best of luck.

Edited November 17, 2008 by Gemmie

[Ban Hammer 13,491]

He's a soldier. With respect to Coria, soldiers are trained to be unemotional and detached. A good soldier will view anyone who is not a colleague as a civilian. His role is to serve to defend and protect. Not love.

oh come on now. unemotional, detached? i sure musta missed those military taught classes during my 20 year stint.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

He's a soldier. With respect to Coria, soldiers are trained to be unemotional and detached. A good soldier will view anyone who is not a colleague as a civilian. His role is to serve to defend and protect. Not love.

oh come on now. unemotional, detached? i sure musta missed those military taught classes during my 20 year stint.

you obviously did. see? you should NOT love nessa or the baby. Bad army person, bad bad bad

[Ban Hammer 13,491]

He's a soldier. With respect to Coria, soldiers are trained to be unemotional and detached. A good soldier will view anyone who is not a colleague as a civilian. His role is to serve to defend and protect. Not love.

oh come on now. unemotional, detached? i sure musta missed those military taught classes during my 20 year stint.

you obviously did. see? you should NOT love nessa or the baby. Bad army person, bad bad bad

apparently.