Fiancee wants her family to come to America too....

[Boiler 46,109]

You ask about visitor visa's, nothing to have stopped them trying now, only the application fee at risk, but to state the obvious they are for visiting, there is no suggestion in your posts that they have any intention of returning. It is quite likely he Consulate will see it that way.

I am assuming they are not stupid, that they know the deal, that they are in it for the long run and appreciate that until one of the daughters gets citizenship the Mother is not going anywhere.

[aaron2020 11,651]

I came to the US when I was 3 years old. I grew up in California, and I am a professional living in San Francisco. My girlfriend is a wonder black woman that I met in graduate school.

So how did you end up here? Just helping your VN family members?

Visajourney.com is a wonderful site with all its guides on immigration. However, the guides are static and I have learned more from our fellow posters. I think its great to that people are sharing their immigration experiences. Some stories have been heart-warming and some serve as tales of caution.

I am here to learn, share, and help my family in Vietnam. I have a very typical California upbringing and did not have any meaningful contact with my family in Vietnam of 25 years. After my first trip to Vietnam in 1998, I began to bond with my family there. I learned that my cousins had been denied access to the Vietnamese educational system because of our familial ties to the US military. Over the last ten years, I have been funding the education for my cousins' children. I hope to bring a few of them to the US as foreign student.

In addition, I am helping my father with his petition for the benefit of my brother in Vietnam. A brother that I didn't know that I had until after my first trip to Vietnam.

I also have a cousin here in the US that has applied for immigration visas for the benefit of her siblings. I helped her filled out the I-130s and I am here to learn more about the immigration process so I can provide her with the necessary information.

[nickoftime 0]

The obvious solution would be for you to move to Vietnam.

Then everybody is happy.

Hahaha! That truly made me laugh. But ain't that true?

[JonasMichaels 0]

The obvious solution would be for you to move to Vietnam.

Then everybody is happy.

Hahaha! That truly made me laugh. But ain't that true?

Not really, since the mom's whole point was to get her kids out of a communist country.

[toma1 10]

Not really, since the mom's whole point was to get her kids out of a communist country.

I noticed a BIG difference in VN attitudes between Saigon and Hanoi.

Sure is a beautiful country, though... like the movie A Quiet American.

[Completely 3]

You know... it's sad, but this was something that I was concerned about at one point (but not anymore). However, there are a few things people should know.

First of all, Asian men, especially from Thailand and Philippines, but also Vietnam, etc., that marry a local woman USUALLY help her family if they have the means to do so. You should not immediately suspect that you are being used just because your wife asks you to help her family. That is a normal part of marriage in this area of the world. OF COURSE scams exist, but requests for family support are not an accurate indicator. If you are considering marrying a Thai (and to a lesser extent, anyone from this area of the world) I'd recommend this book, which may help you to bridge the HUGE cultural gap that you are about to experience. http://thailandfever.com/

I can speak to this because I know it is true, but my fiancee DID NOT request me to bring her family over. Her parents are actually quite old (older than mine) and I asked, "if one of your parents dies, we should probably start the visa process ASAP for them in case we need to bring the other one over." But SHE said it wouldn't be necessary because other family members would step in. She's actually a professional, but like most Thai women, she helps to support her parents to the tune of about $300 per month. She wants to continue to do that, but it will take some time for her to be employed here, so I volunteered to pay this amount until she is able to take it over again herself.

By the way, Thailand still has dowries (male pays bride's family) at all levels of society and this is typically only waived if the woman is divorced or has a child. Being asked to pay a dowry is also NOT a bad sign in any way. I wrote the Thailand section about this in Wikipedia if anyone is interested: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride_price

I agree with the OP especially with Toma.. But before I share what i think, let me answer the question of the OP..

You need to wait for your wife to be a US CITIZEN before she can petition her family in the US.

Her family can apply a visit visa, if they can show a strong ties/proof like property or bank account that there is no reason for them to immigrate to the US..

Now with what Toma said, we are being raised as Family oriented person, we take good care of our families by helping them on things, but not all and this does not mean that our husband will take all the responsibilities we have in the Philippines.

Me and my husband have talked in the past before we got married that I will continue working as I have parents who is in late 60's that needs my help. He agreed on this and now we have no issues..

What i think , this is about what you have talk about or agreed about in certain things before getting married... Scammers are all over the world, not only in Asia, so we can not generalize people based on where they came from.

I am proud to say that when I married my husband I already have a good paying job and enough savings to start a family.... I never depended on him financially on whatever things that my family needed, if he offers helps, yes I might accept it, but I told him as long as I am working, we will be helping one another on giving help on both families as much as we can.. But our own family, our kids, will still be the first priority... As he also help his mom and his sister in times of need. It is just he is from the United States, the reason why people think someone marry them for a GC..

Every situation if different,.. PEACE TO EVERYONE.

Edited November 3, 2008 by Completely

[Cham 3]

In the process I have learned a hard lesson about life and love - it is more important who YOU love and not who loves you. It is a risk that way, sure, but no man (or woman for that matter) is ever happy just being loved, they have to really feel the love for the other person first. I love Phuong. Sure, ideal scenario is we both love each other the same - but I am not going to miss out on this experience with her because I am worried she may not love me as much as I love her. I like how I feel around her, and I like it enough to risk that perhaps I will get burned in the end ... I can't control if she will leave me in the future or not, so I must live for the present, and at present, this is as close to true love as I have ever felt.

Jonas

Wow... that's pretty profound... good for you!

"You are what you love, not what loves you back" - Jenny Lewis

If everyone was that unselfish, people would have better relationships... in many cases, once you adopt that attitude, you will find that your spouse will love you more. Sometimes people pressure their loved ones to love them back. You'll never find real love like that.

AMEN TO THAT!!!

Look YOU love her let it be that