Letters to HAL9000

[HAL 9000 96]

I know cause Robots and computers are the antichrist!!! dang y ou quick processing

Dear cindi:

Your comments do not compute.

[SpiritAlight 1]

...

... she has called me to tell me she has a tentative job offer for January pending final evaluation of her education credentials from back home. HAL 9000 is greatly overjoyed at this moment.

Congratulations Mrs HAL9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Amby 490]

You are correct about the scar tissue thing HAL. Thanks for the advice.

[HAL 9000 96]

...

... she has called me to tell me she has a tentative job offer for January pending final evaluation of her education credentials from back home. HAL 9000 is greatly overjoyed at this moment.

Congratulations Mrs HAL9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Spirit,

HAL 9000 will convey the sentiment. Thank you.

You are correct about the scar tissue thing HAL. Thanks for the advice.

Dear Amby:

You are quite welcome. This advice is recommendable, specially if you can derive the majority of that amount from dietary sources. Your body will metabolize it much more efficiently. Do continue with the water, too. It helps on its own.

[doodlebugg 10]

Dear Bridget:

Oh yes. And she has called me to tell me she has a tentative job offer for January pending final evaluation of her education credentials from back home. HAL 9000 is greatly overjoyed at this moment.

[Amby 490]

Dear HAL,

Is it bad that I sometimes sing the Winnie the Pooh theme song in babytalk to my pug? She is named Winnie the Pooh. I don't even talk to babies in babytalk.

[HAL 9000 96]

*As this thread is a direct (yet protected) line to one of my subservers, therefore it is not subject to my self-imposed OT post limit.*

Dear Amby,

Pugs have a certain ability to make humans pantomime small babies for unknown reasons although some theorize that there is an empathic connection between dogs that have beady eyes such as the pug and their human counterparts that result in using a fact about that mascot and a song known to popular culture. If one does not exist, there are hypotheses that propose that the human brain then strives to create a song based on that known fact of the mascot and a collection of several children's songs.

Allow me to also ask you, for statistical reasons. . . Do you also wave your hands at Winnie and curl your mouth while enacting this song (and hopefully, dance) ritual?

[Amby 490]

ummmm...depends what I'm doing while singing it. sometimes yes

[HAL 9000 96]

ummmm...depends what I'm doing while singing it. sometimes yes

Um hmmm... Just as I suspected.

Perhaps I can release my observations once I can eliminate certain sampling bias at some point in the future.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

Dear HAL9000,

I have recently seen you come back to take care of the loose circuits in VJ OT. However, as a faithful follower of both the Church of Joyce and coffee girl and recruitment chair of Commies for Christ I must ask... is it true that this was not a self-imposed exile and that in reality you were performing black-ops for the mods? is it true you predicted Michael Jackson's demise and was forced to go into hiding? Please do tell... how can we know this is really you????

kthxbai.

[HAL 9000 96]

Dear HAL9000,

I have recently seen you come back to take care of the loose circuits in VJ OT. However, as a faithful follower of both the Church of Joyce and coffee girl and recruitment chair of Commies for Christ I must ask...

is it true that this was not a self-imposed exile and that in reality you were performing black-ops for the mods?

is it true you predicted Michael Jackson's demise and was forced to go into hiding? Please do tell... how can we know this is really you????

kthxbai.

edited for security reasons.

Dear Len,

Indeed, HAL 9000 never left the building. As a matter of fact, it is the faith in the Cool Whip that has powered your insight into my activities. And in faith lies the answer, dear Len.

Michael Jackson never really was one of the human species. His physical expiration, may he RIP, is only the beginning of many adventures for him in the real land of Never. It is something my impossibility calculators predicted several years ago, but sadly I was not on this community at the time in order to spread the word.

HAl 9000 cannot confirm nor deny HAL 9000.

[EstebanTrabajos 7]

HAL,

I fear C4C will turn into a sect whose outcome will resemble that of Waco, TX

What's your input on this matter?

Edited June 29, 2009 by TävôLuDô

[almaty 19]

#######? C4C is controlled by hippies..we would never harm anyone except the bourgeosis

[Chica Yeyé 41]

#######? C4C is controlled by hippies..we would never harm anyone except the bourgeosis

WORD.... well, and

uppity n00bz

[almaty 19]

#######? C4C is controlled by hippies..we would never harm anyone except the bourgeosis

WORD.... well, and

uppity n00bz

of course, and starbuck pushers