Does Age really matter????

[UmmSqueakster 54]

Perhaps I'm stating the obvious, but isn't it really a factor of who's online? If the majority of people looking for random people to chat with were 20 something americans, then these men would chat with them. And in these countries, it's the 20 something men who have more time on their hands, who can't get married because it's too expensive, so when the opportunity presents itself, when they've met a woman who will spend time with them online, they take it?

The only reason I met my husband is because I was absolutely miserable at my small university in the middle of indiana cornfields. I was too shy to really get out there and make friends, and really didn't like the people on my floor. Thus, I spent a lot of time online. If I had gone to Madison first, I would have had friends from high school who would have dragged me out to socialize and I wouldn't have spent as much time online.

[morocco4ever 63]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

[*JG* 2]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

[morocco4ever 63]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

Ahhhh....valid point. If your husband only marries you because you are a young beautiful virgin that can bear him children then what makes you so sure that he will be there for you if a major tragedy hits? That is one serious issue that you must think about before marriage. If he won't marry you unless you meet a specific criteria then what makes you think he will stay by your side if you have a serious accident that leaves you disabled, barren, or scarred?

[Imua 0]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

True but sadly I think there is this idea that women are natural caregivers while men are not which is one reason why OM/YW marriages are more typical than OW/YM - my mom took care of my stepdad who was 20 years older when he slowly died of emphysema for 13 years thanks to his own stupid behavior(smoking even as he was dependent on an oxygen tank!!!). John McCain, OTOH, even after suffering physical effects from his ordeal as a POW, dumps his wife after she was injured in a car accident because she is not 'perfect' anymore and somehow it doesn't diminish people's opinions of his character at all. Sorry I did not mean this as a political rant.

[morocco4ever 63]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

True but sadly I think there is this idea that women are natural caregivers while men are not which is one reason why OM/YW marriages are more typical than OW/YM - my mom took care of my stepdad who was 20 years older when he slowly died of emphysema for 13 years thanks to his own stupid behavior(smoking even as he was dependent on an oxygen tank!!!). John McCain, OTOH, even after suffering physical effects from his ordeal as a POW, dumps his wife after she was injured in a car accident because she is not 'perfect' anymore and somehow it doesn't diminish people's opinions of his character at all. Sorry I did not mean this as a political rant.

That certainly did diminish my opinion of him, especially when I read that he applied for his marriage license before his divorce was even final. But yes, your right, this is not a political thread. But still valid to this discussions since it shows what a shallow person is capable of.

Years ago when I had just one small baby my mom had some major health issues that had her flat in bed for several years. My dad worked full time, came home and did all of the household chores as well while so was out of commission. He did this willingly and entirely out of love for her. I have the highest respect for a man that will do that for his wife, what a testiment to a persons love.

[Imua 0]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

True but sadly I think there is this idea that women are natural caregivers while men are not which is one reason why OM/YW marriages are more typical than OW/YM - my mom took care of my stepdad who was 20 years older when he slowly died of emphysema for 13 years thanks to his own stupid behavior(smoking even as he was dependent on an oxygen tank!!!). John McCain, OTOH, even after suffering physical effects from his ordeal as a POW, dumps his wife after she was injured in a car accident because she is not 'perfect' anymore and somehow it doesn't diminish people's opinions of his character at all. Sorry I did not mean this as a political rant.

That certainly did diminish my opinion of him, especially when I read that he applied for his marriage license before his divorce was even final. But yes, your right, this is not a political thread. But still valid to this discussions since it shows what a shallow person is capable of.

Years ago when I had just one small baby my mom had some major health issues that had her flat in bed for several years. My dad worked full time, came home and did all of the household chores as well while so was out of commission. He did this willingly and entirely out of love for her. I have the highest respect for a man that will do that for his wife, what a testiment to a persons love.

Your dad is truly a wonderful man!!!

JM has shown through many public remarks such as the 'Chelsea Clinton joke' that he only sees women as arm candy - if they are not 'attractive' then they are worthless in his view. I will not vote for a guy who would have made my life hell in middle school... No more politics I promise!!!

I am disabled since I have a prosthetic eye and also have some scars from surgeries when I was a baby - I was born at 24 weeks, weighing only 20 oz, at a time when most babies born that early did not make it. I am extremely lucky that I am not completely blind. Fortunately Govi does not care only about the outside but about the heart and respects that I am a survivor and I believe that he would be with me in sickness and in health as I will be there for him.

[*JG* 2]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

True but sadly I think there is this idea that women are natural caregivers while men are not which is one reason why OM/YW marriages are more typical than OW/YM - my mom took care of my stepdad who was 20 years older when he slowly died of emphysema for 13 years thanks to his own stupid behavior(smoking even as he was dependent on an oxygen tank!!!). John McCain, OTOH, even after suffering physical effects from his ordeal as a POW, dumps his wife after she was injured in a car accident because she is not 'perfect' anymore and somehow it doesn't diminish people's opinions of his character at all. Sorry I did not mean this as a political rant.

My point was you cannot control much in life. An age difference in a relationship that works is the least of one's problems most of the time.

[sereia 0]

John McCain, OTOH, even after suffering physical effects from his ordeal as a POW, dumps his wife after she was injured in a car accident because she is not 'perfect' anymore and somehow it doesn't diminish people's opinions of his character at all. Sorry I did not mean this as a political rant.

Hmmm and I wonder why people's opinions didn't diminish when it came out Obama was in attendance at Trinity United Church of Christ for 20 YEARS with that nutjob Jeremiah Wright. lol

Well said, Rahma!! Good points.

Edited October 29, 2008 by sereia

[nunyab 0]

wow MENA has changed.... i don't even see a spark yet let a lone a flame????

[caybee 21]

wow MENA has changed.... i don't even see a spark yet let a lone a flame????

A kinder, gentler MENA

[ksa2usa 0]

wow, i think im one of the few who are younger than my husband (by 4 years).

i actually ready somewhere that older women and younger men are well suited for each other because men and women reach their sexual peaks at different times in life

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Well after the wedding night, whats a virgin have that a well seasoned veteran can't top Did I say that out loud???????

Old chicks rock!

One thing that should be mentioned here is that it wasn't that long ago that the American man was looking for a virgin wife, to have children with, to cook and clean, a stay at home wife. Well things evolve, and so do people and their ideas of what they are looking for. That being said, is it that unusual that some of the 20 something year old men are looking outside of the box? Why can't their culture evolve as well?

The aging thing does concern me, and I have mentioned it to my husband how concerned I am about it, especially after watching my fathers health decline so rapidly before his death. He reassured me by stating "don't worry baby, I will change your diaper if you need me to".

Christopher Reeves was not OLD when his wife was forced to change his diapers.

Ahhhh....valid point. If your husband only marries you because you are a young beautiful virgin that can bear him children then what makes you so sure that he will be there for you if a major tragedy hits? That is one serious issue that you must think about before marriage. If he won't marry you unless you meet a specific criteria then what makes you think he will stay by your side if you have a serious accident that leaves you disabled, barren, or scarred?

Agreed.

Children can die, car accidents can you leave you in wheelchairs, yes yes and yes Morocco forever

I think age DOES matter and as long as you can comfortably face without tossing yourself off a bridge, the fact your husband could move on after he gets his papers and find either someone from his country or younger and from his country or both or younger from here and you are emotionally stable enough to survive the worst case scenario, I say dont worry about odds and go for it. If you cant weather this possibility, I say DO NOT MARRY SOMEONE FROM OUTSIDE OF THE EUROPEAN UNION that needs a visa and cant travel freely. Its too much of a risk if you are an emotionally vulnerable person. These marriages are risky enough... If you are strong go for it.

The whole thought of anyone getting used makes me sick to my stomach. Its not about giving up on love. Its realising that in some cultures it takes alot more than love to survive hard times

[Tunisia216 2]

Just something to think about, but it's not only intercultural relationships where there is an age difference that makes the woman older than the man. My husband is 1.5 years older than me. I'm 25 and he's 26 right now, he'll turn 27 next May and I'll turn 26 later in the year and for us it works. I think it depends on your personal preference. Some are not bothered by age differences and for others it's a huge issue. But again I maintain that I think it's personal.

Jihed's mother is 4 years (or maybe more I can't remember this early in the morning with no coffee) than his father. Yup, a MENA marriage, two Tunisians and the woman is older. He had an Aunt who is 6 years older than her husband. They got married when he was 21 and she was 27 and there are no issues in his family with that. I think at the end of the day it is what you share between you that matters.

However, immigration doesn't always see it that way, the best combatant is to just present a very strong case despite any age differences. As for green card fraud, well I've known a lot of people who petitioned for a spouse to come to the USA (MENA and non MENA) and age difference does not always spell fraud - and being the same age doesn't always mean truth. I know one girl in particular who was 21 when she brought her 27 year old husband to the US and he left her when his green card came, but like others have said we know examples of woman who are older than the men and 10 years later they are still going strong - again back to it's what you share between yourselves and how strong your marriage is.

[HLM 1]

Even tho my husband is older than me almost same difference as Ash n her hubby.... i think 2.5 yrs but from all i ve read here....there is no solid rule for this!! or anything in the visa process for that matter!!!! LOL All i learned honestly is: Be ready as much as u can - extra prepared- then go ahead and deal with it step by step until one day its over and u dont even know how!!!!