Are Americans safe in Morocco?

[sussemadel 16]

Let's support MartiniOlive and not tell her he's using her!!!

Yes, we should support Martiniolive. But is that helping her by reassuring her he isn't using her? Do you even know if he is or not? How about just opening her eyes to the possibilities that maybe she didn't think of (or why would she be posting in various forums about it?) We shouldn't just cheer each other on and forget that a huge amount of people DO get used.

Hanginginthere has been hurt, yes. But it doesn't mean she says those things just because she has been hurt by her husband. She is trying to help in her own way. We all have different personalities. Hanginginthere has experienced a lot, spoken to a lot of people, traveled a lot in MENA, and I think she has a lot of valid things to say.

Look, only martiniolive knows what goes on in her relationship. We can all psychoanalyze it to death but do any of us really know how he said those things and what he meant by them? And if he loves her or if he's using her? Nope.

I think we should all point out possibilities and then tell her to trust her instincts .

I wasn't reassuring her and telling her he wasn't using her. I just don't think it's right to tell someone to get a divorce right away when she doesn't know the full story either. I wasn't psychoanalyzing her relationship. And wasn't trying to insinuate that just because i advised to support her, that we should all assume their relationship is valid. Support to me means not jumping to conclusions though. Give the person advice ...sure, but like you said ONLY when you know really what's going on . I think Martiniolive's original question though was not asking for advice about if she should divorce him or not. She merely wanted to know if Morroco was a safe place to live. All in all though, it's hard to give advice though when we don't know the full story. It wasn't me who was giving quick advice though without knowing all the details.

[morocco4ever 63]

Dear Martiniolive:

It was not wrong of you to post here on the board. I know you say that you were emotional and should've waited until things settled down. However, in that particular moment, you needed to vent your feelings. It is totally understandable. All of us have different opinions on the matter and we just tried to help the best way possible.

As for learning Darija, it would be good to learn just for the fact you are married to a Morrocan. It will help in understanding the culture better and getting closer to his family.

Secondly, Morroco is FULL OF TOURISTS. The three languages used are native (like Darija), French (because of the French controlled Morroco at one time) and English (for all those tourists).

I really don't think Morroco would be such a bad place to live.

You remember my thoughts for you was very very different. All situations are different. Culture shock is a whole hell of alot different than opportunism. I treasure the advice from these boards. You gave me stern and amazing advice when I was in crisis and it wasnt to stay together or coddle him. It was divorce. I think she should give him a chance but pay attention. How someone acts in crisis or things not going their way is pretty indicative of everything else they will do

Experience a huge loss, death, lose all your money and you will figure out real fast where u rank... Leaving after a visa turndown? I am not buying it. I stand behind what I said and I doubt his intentions 200 percent

Kat, just want to point out something. We gave you advise based on solid evidence of your husbands intentions and actions, not on suspicions. What Martini's husband has been accused of here are suspicions, not facts. That is the difference.

As for bringing husbands here, well lets just say I think it is best to never say anything here that you don't want him to read.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

As for bringing husbands here, well lets just say I think it is best to never say anything here that you don't want him to read.

yep. This is a PUBLIC forum, on the internet for goodness sakes

[sussemadel 16]

Honestly, Kat gets upset when Martiniolive's husband came onto the forum, but yet it's kind of like going behind your husband's back when you air out your dirty laundry and don't give them a chance to defend themselves. If her husband did that to her, she'd be blaming all arab men for it

[nunyab 0]

lol you know my husband has an account here and once in a while i will find little notes from my husband to me... and I agree I never post anything I wouldn't want my husband to see. To me it doesn't make sense why would i post something on a public forum and not want my husband to see it???????

Edited November 9, 2008 by Rajaa_Reda