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Filed: Timeline
Posted (edited)

The irony in this whole thread is that the American women on this site disprove the 'gold digger' angle at the very least...petitioning men who will likely not 'hit the ground running' and land some swish job. The American women on this site obviously also prove that we are family minded...at least in the husband/wife sense. If the American women here were interested in money and things over quality and creating a life with one man....well hell, there'd be hardly any AW here petitioning foreign men.

FYI, I'm in my 30's, I have no kids, I take care of myself financially, am physically fit...I lead a very healthy and active lifestyle which includes eating right and working out 5 days a week. I would love to settle down with a man and start a family of our own. I wouldn't run from a man who makes little money...depending on the circs, of course. If he's back in school to better himself or starting out his own biz and has fallen on tough times, I make enough to keep things afloat. Of course, if he's capping out at 18k a year with no hopes of growth because he's lazy/unambitious/uneducated...hell no. But that becomes more about characteristic traits that I find unattractive, and not really to do with money per se.

So don't tell me I'm the only female in America like this, cos that's laughable.

Some of the men here stated things like 'American women expect too much' and in the same breath (or paragraph), list their desires in a partner, some characteristics are in direct contrast to each other. It's never going to happen if you don't 'get real'....you want a woman who basically doesn't have an opinion of her own....Steve, you want a woman who doesn't' care about money at all, yet you're unattracted to strong assertive women. How can a woman not be strong if she is to be a partner to a man who is not financially strong? I infer that you just want a woman who will be happy with what you give her, and nothing more. You don't want an equal partner, you want a woman who will run and hide when the dishwasher blows up. There's this saying 'give a starving man a stale Saltine and he'll think it's the best Ritz he's ever eaten.' Are you a stale Saltine, Steve? Is that why you're afraid of expectations?

I'm personally not offended by your views, because they shout to me a very sad picture...you must have been hellaciously hurt in the past, and for that, I pity you. I hope in this period you find yourself single, you do some soul searching and perhaps some therapy which gets to the bottom of why you are so scared to be with someone who has expectations of you. Sounds to me like you've disappointed some people in your life, and it has really affected you greatly. But don't kid yourself....we all have expectations...some are realistic, some are not. Yours seem a little 'set up for failure' if you ask me, and until you get to to bottom of things, you may very well find yourself on your 6th or 7th visa and still in the same boat you're in now.

'Its not me, it's them'

Best of luck to you!

Edited by Happy Bunny
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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Romania
Timeline
Posted
The irony in this whole thread is that the American women on this site disprove the 'gold digger' angle at the very least...petitioning men who will likely not 'hit the ground running' and land some swish job. The American women on this site obviously also prove that we are family minded...at least in the husband/wife sense. If the American women here were interested in money and things over quality and creating a life with one man....well hell, there'd be hardly any AW here petitioning foreign men.

FYI, I'm in my 30's, I have no kids, I take care of myself financially, am physically fit...I lead a very healthy and active lifestyle which includes eating right and working out 5 days a week. I would love to settle down with a man and start a family of our own. I wouldn't run from a man who makes little money...depending on the circs, of course. If he's back in school to better himself or starting out his own biz and has fallen on tough times, I make enough to keep things afloat. Of course, if he's capping out at 18k a year with no hopes of growth because he's lazy/unambitious/uneducated...hell no. But that becomes more about characteristic traits that I find unattractive, and not really to do with money per se.

So don't tell me I'm the only female in America like this, cos that's laughable.

Some of the men here stated things like 'American women expect too much' and in the same breath (or paragraph), list their desires in a partner, some characteristics are in direct contrast to each other. It's never going to happen if you don't 'get real'....you want a woman who basically doesn't have an opinion of her own....Steve, you want a woman who doesn't' care about money at all, yet you're unattracted to strong assertive women. How can a woman not be strong if she is to be a partner to a man who is not financially strong? I infer that you just want a woman who will be happy with what you give her, and nothing more. You don't want an equal partner, you want a woman who will run and hide when the dishwasher blows up. There's this saying 'give a starving man a stale Saltine and he'll think it's the best Ritz he's ever eaten.' Are you a stale Saltine, Steve? Is that why you're afraid of expectations?

I'm personally not offended by your views, because they shout to me a very sad picture...you must have been hellaciously hurt in the past, and for that, I pity you. I hope in this period you find yourself single, you do some soul searching and perhaps some therapy which gets to the bottom of why you are so scared to be with someone who has expectations of you. Sounds to me like you've disappointed some people in your life, and it has really affected you greatly. But don't kid yourself....we all have expectations...some are realistic, some are not. Yours seem a little 'set up for failure' if you ask me, and until you get to to bottom of things, you may very well find yourself on your 6th or 7th visa and still in the same boat you're in now.

'Its not me, it's them'

Best of luck to you!

best post in all of the thread :thumbs:

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"VJ Timelines are only an estimate, they are not actual approval dates! They only reflect VJ members. VJ Timelines do not include the thousands of applicants who do not use VJ"

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
Timeline
Posted
The irony in this whole thread is that the American women on this site disprove the 'gold digger' angle at the very least...petitioning men who will likely not 'hit the ground running' and land some swish job. The American women on this site obviously also prove that we are family minded...at least in the husband/wife sense. If the American women here were interested in money and things over quality and creating a life with one man....well hell, there'd be hardly any AW here petitioning foreign men.

FYI, I'm in my 30's, I have no kids, I take care of myself financially, am physically fit...I lead a very healthy and active lifestyle which includes eating right and working out 5 days a week. I would love to settle down with a man and start a family of our own. I wouldn't run from a man who makes little money...depending on the circs, of course. If he's back in school to better himself or starting out his own biz and has fallen on tough times, I make enough to keep things afloat. Of course, if he's capping out at 18k a year with no hopes of growth because he's lazy/unambitious/uneducated...hell no. But that becomes more about characteristic traits that I find unattractive, and not really to do with money per se.

So don't tell me I'm the only female in America like this, cos that's laughable.

Some of the men here stated things like 'American women expect too much' and in the same breath (or paragraph), list their desires in a partner, some characteristics are in direct contrast to each other. It's never going to happen if you don't 'get real'....you want a woman who basically doesn't have an opinion of her own....Steve, you want a woman who doesn't' care about money at all, yet you're unattracted to strong assertive women. How can a woman not be strong if she is to be a partner to a man who is not financially strong? I infer that you just want a woman who will be happy with what you give her, and nothing more. You don't want an equal partner, you want a woman who will run and hide when the dishwasher blows up. There's this saying 'give a starving man a stale Saltine and he'll think it's the best Ritz he's ever eaten.' Are you a stale Saltine, Steve? Is that why you're afraid of expectations?

I'm personally not offended by your views, because they shout to me a very sad picture...you must have been hellaciously hurt in the past, and for that, I pity you. I hope in this period you find yourself single, you do some soul searching and perhaps some therapy which gets to the bottom of why you are so scared to be with someone who has expectations of you. Sounds to me like you've disappointed some people in your life, and it has really affected you greatly. But don't kid yourself....we all have expectations...some are realistic, some are not. Yours seem a little 'set up for failure' if you ask me, and until you get to to bottom of things, you may very well find yourself on your 6th or 7th visa and still in the same boat you're in now.

'Its not me, it's them'

Best of luck to you!

best post in all of the thread :thumbs:

not really - she left out the fact that she's hotter than a tin roof in texas in august.

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USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

Posted
How can a woman not be strong if she is to be a partner to a man who is not financially strong? I infer that you just want a woman who will be happy with what you give her, and nothing more. You don't want an equal partner, you want a woman who will run and hide when the dishwasher blows up. There's this saying 'give a starving man a stale Saltine and he'll think it's the best Ritz he's ever eaten.' Are you a stale Saltine, Steve? Is that why you're afraid of expectations?

Isn't that why people like steve choose to seek out partners from developing countries? Many don't really have any idea about how far a dollar goes in the US. Anyone with a job in the US may seem rich in comparison to how they live. (You hear over and over again about how others from developing countries don't realize how hard we work for our apartments paved with gold.)

Y'know...my hubby and I married as students, making less than $10k a year. I certainly loved him then. And I love him now, making $40k a year. (We're young - no kids, no mortgage, no car payments...) I'm not exactly sure how you only make 18k a year. Hubby's degree wasn't very useful but he still manages to make a decent entry-level salary.

Yet I loved him as a starving student and I love him now. It's amazing how you can grow with a person. :D

we met: 07-22-01

engaged: 08-03-06

I-129 sent: 01-07-07

NOA2 approved: 04-02-07

packet 3 sent: 05-31-07

interview date: 06-25-07 - approved!

marriage: 07-23-07

AOS sent: 08-10-07

AOS/EAD/AP NOA1: 09-14-07

AOS approved: 11-19-07

green card received: 11-26-07

lifting of conditions filed: 10-29-09

NOA received: 11-09-09

lifting of conditions approved: 12-11-09

Posted

I still say that Steve isn't ready for grownup women. Looking for women who by their ages and country of origin are disadvantaged indicates that he simply cannot handle it if he's doesn't appear to be some big hero. Unfortunately for him, these young ladies will also grow up and most likely leave him when they establish themselves in the US. Why? Because he's not a big hero. He's a coward and Filipinas are intelligent women and they will see it in no time. They are intelligent, strong women.

So unless one of them happens to fall in love with him and overlook his obvious insecurities and control issues, it simply isn't likely that the marriage would last even though he can provide more than they at first had. At some point they'll be able to provide for themselves and then all of that control goes straight out the window.

As for weight, my husband is overweight. He carries it well and I'm wildly attracted to him. I married him just this way and I'd do it again. So to suggest that American women discard your friend because of his weight is probably making excuses for himself rather than looking into the real reason he's rejected. Further, I wouldnt' be really proud to suggest that your friend's only chance of finding a woman is to find someone so underprivileged that even he looks good by comparison. Are you two buying these women or are you meeting women who will be partners and equals?

You don't have to answer that question because the answer is very obvious. You're buying but you can only afford "cheap" women. Very insulting to Filipina's.

I do find it amusing that Steve claims a lot of American women would marry him. And yet he can't get a disadvantaged kid from a third world country to marry him. Yet it is the American women that are so bad...

There's something very wrong with this picture.

Sent I-130 to VT 25-Oct-2007

I-130 Moved to California 6-August-2008

My petition has been in 3 states (1, twice) in 9 months!

Rec'd by CSC 8/9, touched 8/11, 8/12, 8/15, 8/20, 8/25

Approved Tuesday, 25-August-2008

10 months since we mailed the petition

Rec'd NVC 9/3, Invoice Generated 9/10, DS-3032 emailed 9/11.

Rec'd AOS invoice 9/15, paid online 9/15, Accepted as Paid 9/18, mailed I-864EZ 9/19

IV Invoiced 9/18, paid online 9/19, Accepted as paid 9/22

DS-230 sent 10/2

Case complete @NVC 10/8 - 11 months, 1 week and 6 days

Interview in Montreal December 18, 2008 - scheduled 1 year, 1 week and 3 days after the start of our journey. Takes place 1 year, 1 month, 3 weeks and 2 days after the start...

[X] Passed [ ] Failed Interview

Thursday, April 2, 2009 Activated Visa - 1 year, 5 months, 1 week and 1 day

Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Zambia
Timeline
Posted

Maybe Steve needs to look elsewhere in the Third World, like Vietnam. Some of these brides seem to be able to put up with most anything, as per this current set of postings:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t=0&start=0

Posted
Maybe Steve needs to look elsewhere in the Third World, like Vietnam. Some of these brides seem to be able to put up with most anything, as per this current set of postings:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t=0&start=0

I don't get it. It seems like this thread is just a guy joking around with his wife.

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Filed: Country: China
Timeline
Posted
POLL for the ladies, BE HONEST!!

How many American ladies here would date or marry a man who only made $18K /yr as his career job(not due to being a student or similar circumstance)BE HONEST NOW!! .

I gurantee you, 80% of American ladies will say "NO WAY!" . But 90% of Latin or Asian ladies will say "YES WAY, as long as he works, it doesnt matter how much he makes".

Forget American Ladies. I would not date/marry a man who makes $18K/yr at your age, not because I can't support myself but only because it tells a lot about his ambition and goals in life. I am not American but Asian

indians are not asian.

____________________________________________________________________________

obamasolyndrafleeced-lmao.jpg

Filed: Timeline
Posted
POLL for the ladies, BE HONEST!!

How many American ladies here would date or marry a man who only made $18K /yr as his career job(not due to being a student or similar circumstance)BE HONEST NOW!! .

I gurantee you, 80% of American ladies will say "NO WAY!" . But 90% of Latin or Asian ladies will say "YES WAY, as long as he works, it doesnt matter how much he makes".

Forget American Ladies. I would not date/marry a man who makes $18K/yr at your age, not because I can't support myself but only because it tells a lot about his ambition and goals in life. I am not American but Asian

indians are not asian.

define 'asian' for us.

personally, i'm not a big fan of 'asia' as a continent. seems lazy, something a bunch of old white folk came up with to describe everything west of the urals.

eta: i mean east.

Man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he is.

Filed: Country: China
Timeline
Posted

Forget American Ladies. I would not date/marry a man who makes $18K/yr at your age, not because I can't support myself but only because it tells a lot about his ambition and goals in life. I am not American but Asian

indians are not asian.

define 'asian' for us.

personally, i'm not a big fan of 'asia' as a continent. seems lazy, something a bunch of old white folk came up with to describe everything west of the urals.

eta: i mean east.

india is what the english called "the subcontinent". the native people there are not asian. alta plano chileans are more of an "asian" people than people from india. (yeah, i worked in india, was not impressed, liked chile much better).

india was peopled by a variety of immigrants over the past 30-40,000 years. dravidians came from the mediterranean cultures and settled in the indus valley, negritos came from east africa and have since occupied the andamans and other parts of the southern tip. australoids come over during the ice ages and to this day occupy the eastern and some central parts of the country. aryans entered from persia and fathered the culture that currently occupies the north and west of india. other groups immigrated to india from south eastern europe and the northern middle east and occupy the western states, including gujarat, kamatka, etc. mongols entered the northern parts of what is india today and settled in the mountainous north states, such as manipur, and assam.

you can see the variety of origin in the variety of languages in common use in india. erdu, an aryan language sounding rather like german in spoken form, is used more frequently than anything other than hindi or english, but there are 14 different written languages represented on the national currency, and approximately 25 different spoken languages in common use, varigated principally by state.

so you see, india is an ethnically and culturally disharmonius agglomeration of states, which today writhes vainly in agonising strife in search of social order. many states seek independence, and the central government has barely enough power to keep them together. this explains the economic chaos that exists in india today. this explains why so many indians want to move to America.

____________________________________________________________________________

obamasolyndrafleeced-lmao.jpg

Filed: Country: China
Timeline
Posted

"asian", as a term to describe ethnic heritage, is more difficult to define. modern demographers include chinese, japanese, and koreans in one group of "asians". they include VN, thai, and cambodians in another group of "south east asians". people from the island cultures are described as "pacific islanders", and would include philipines, even though there has been significant chinese influence in the fils.

some people describe ural people as "west asians", and paki's/afghanis as "central asians". this for lack of a better term. this only for convenient geographic differentiation, and not having reference to ethnicity.

____________________________________________________________________________

obamasolyndrafleeced-lmao.jpg

Filed: Other Country: China
Timeline
Posted
"asian", as a term to describe ethnic heritage, is more difficult to define. modern demographers include chinese, japanese, and koreans in one group of "asians". they include VN, thai, and cambodians in another group of "south east asians". people from the island cultures are described as "pacific islanders", and would include philipines, even though there has been significant chinese influence in the fils.

some people describe ural people as "west asians", and paki's/afghanis as "central asians". this for lack of a better term. this only for convenient geographic differentiation, and not having reference to ethnicity.

It would be so much more clear to people if the term "Oriental" were still in favor. I never understood why that went away.

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Posted
It would be so much more clear to people if the term "Oriental" were still in favor. I never understood why that went away.

They say you can only use it now if you're talking about rugs.

Sent I-130 to VT 25-Oct-2007

I-130 Moved to California 6-August-2008

My petition has been in 3 states (1, twice) in 9 months!

Rec'd by CSC 8/9, touched 8/11, 8/12, 8/15, 8/20, 8/25

Approved Tuesday, 25-August-2008

10 months since we mailed the petition

Rec'd NVC 9/3, Invoice Generated 9/10, DS-3032 emailed 9/11.

Rec'd AOS invoice 9/15, paid online 9/15, Accepted as Paid 9/18, mailed I-864EZ 9/19

IV Invoiced 9/18, paid online 9/19, Accepted as paid 9/22

DS-230 sent 10/2

Case complete @NVC 10/8 - 11 months, 1 week and 6 days

Interview in Montreal December 18, 2008 - scheduled 1 year, 1 week and 3 days after the start of our journey. Takes place 1 year, 1 month, 3 weeks and 2 days after the start...

[X] Passed [ ] Failed Interview

Thursday, April 2, 2009 Activated Visa - 1 year, 5 months, 1 week and 1 day

Posted

The poll idea is interesting because the majority of people I know from Chinese and Indian backgrounds, especially, push their children very hard to get educated and to make a good living and they'd be hard pressed to accept a mate who makes $18K at the age of 30 or 40 or whatever.

The kind of person who would say they dont' mind how much you make so long as you work probably doesn't have a lot of hope where they are, so they'll marry you for a ticket out, not for how much you make. Will they stay with you? I think that's a good question to ask. Anyone have any statistics? My guess is that when you are not making enough to really support yourself and her that things will be full of tension and the wife will figure out they can do better elsewhere. Because she can.

Think of the American women who wouldn't marry you as having the good sense to know that you aren't capable of doing better and therefore you're not really good long-term investment material so they just skip the marriage and divorce part of our program.

Considering that I make >4X $18K, I wouldn't marry a guy who only makes $18K because I'd assume they're 22 years old and just starting out and that's too young for me. And if they're in their 30s or 40s, we'd be significantly incompatible because in general (in general, not a sweeping statement), people my age who make considerably less than me likely come from a very different background and this would pose an issue within the relationship. Even an artist who loves their work wouldn't be compatible with me because while I may admire it, I wouldn't want to tie my future to someone whose ability to share the economic load were so limited. Life is freaking hard right now. People are getting laid off left and right. So how is $18K going to pay the mortgage, feed the family, and pay utilities? It won't.

I think American women simply live in a world that judges people by their perception of REALITY. An American perception that hard work and a good job are what it takes to survive. Someone who is coming from abject poverty might judge on opportunity for themself or their children (or potential children). But anyone who spends any time in the US is going to find the same thing -- that $18K ain't worth a whole lot when you can't afford two cars so both of you can work and they can't earn much more because they don't have an education or facility with the language... and then babies come along and childcare? probably not -- too expensive, so she stays home again. Yeah. That $18K is going to be the starting point of a LOT of arguments.

Sent I-130 to VT 25-Oct-2007

I-130 Moved to California 6-August-2008

My petition has been in 3 states (1, twice) in 9 months!

Rec'd by CSC 8/9, touched 8/11, 8/12, 8/15, 8/20, 8/25

Approved Tuesday, 25-August-2008

10 months since we mailed the petition

Rec'd NVC 9/3, Invoice Generated 9/10, DS-3032 emailed 9/11.

Rec'd AOS invoice 9/15, paid online 9/15, Accepted as Paid 9/18, mailed I-864EZ 9/19

IV Invoiced 9/18, paid online 9/19, Accepted as paid 9/22

DS-230 sent 10/2

Case complete @NVC 10/8 - 11 months, 1 week and 6 days

Interview in Montreal December 18, 2008 - scheduled 1 year, 1 week and 3 days after the start of our journey. Takes place 1 year, 1 month, 3 weeks and 2 days after the start...

[X] Passed [ ] Failed Interview

Thursday, April 2, 2009 Activated Visa - 1 year, 5 months, 1 week and 1 day

 
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