Obligation

[diadromous mermaid 36]

I am probably going to face some discontent with this thread, but I just feel it is necessary to dispell the myth that a USC can simply withdraw his or her obligation made to USCIS under the Affidavit of Support.

Granted, there are legitimate circumstances when the US citizen might be privileged to withdraw sponsorship for an alien, which I am happy to articulate if desired, but what is it with the plethora of posts, recently, and most particularly in this forum, where a US citizen spouse headed for divorce not only asks, but feels that he or she should withdraw the Affidavit of Support for an estranged spouse that has chosen to divorce or has found another love interest?

Surely, before signing the Affidavit of Support in the first place, the US citizen must have realised that it is in place for a purpose, and it is an obligation made that is, for all intents and purposes, irrevocable.

It's surprising to me to see how little an obligation means to many.

[redbarn 0]

I am probably going to face some discontent with this thread, but I just feel it is necessary to dispell the myth that a USC can simply withdraw his or her obligation made to USCIS under the Affidavit of Support.

Granted, there are legitimate circumstances when the US citizen might be privileged to withdraw sponsorship for an alien, which I am happy to articulate if desired, but what is it with the plethora of posts, recently, and most particularly in this forum, where a US citizen spouse headed for divorce not only asks, but feels that he or she should withdraw the Affidavit of Support for an estranged spouse that has chosen to divorce or has found another love interest?

Surely, before signing the Affidavit of Support in the first place, the US citizen must have realised that it is in place for a purpose, and it is an obligation made that is, for all intents and purposes, irrevocable.

It's surprising to me to see how little an obligation means to many.

I don't consider the obligation a small thing at all! I clearly stated to my fiance what it meant to me financially, emotionally and responsibilty wise. I discussed it with him on numerous occassions. I do understand that responsibilty fully. But I took that responsibilty with the full belief that I would have a husband who believed in WE not HE. I thought I was marring a person to build a future with. Rather I just got royally f..... And even then understanding my financial resposibilty I consitued to talk and assist him with his fiances WHILE he is living with the person who he cheated on me with. Yes you read that correctly! Why because I have a 10 year obligation. But I was taken for a ride. When person is sponcered to come to the US and the they are abused by their spouse they can still apply for citizenship. Well in my case I was taken, I tried everything in my marriage and then in divorce to help this slim then he moves past the one who he is living with an marries another. Where does my govt help me? I have to prove now that is was fraud and hope that he doesn't get approved for a 10 years green card and pray that my responsible might end in only a year.

[redbarn 0]

I forgot to mention that prior to our marriage and during he only earned a few thousand dollars since we had to wait for the EAD to come through. And as he got a decent job that is when I kicked him out. I was unable to do it prior as he wouldn't of been able to afford to support himself. I went through over 20+ thousand dollars (health insurance, car, car insurance, clothes, bills, cell phone, international calls to family, spending money etc) on this guy with paying his expenses.

[JenT 0]

There doesn't seem to be any justice, redbarn, in your case and in others where the USC was deceived. If you consider the USCIS's point of view, the intent of the I-864 is to prevent the non-USC from becoming a burden on the government (unemployment, medicare, etc). So the burden is on us, as USCs, to do everything we can to ensure that the marriage is entered into in good faith.

I know you are angry and bitter... you have every right to be. We all sign this paperwork and we all take a chance. Unfortunately, some of us get screwed.

I'm very sorry for the loss of your husband and your dream of a life with him.

Jen

[Nagishkaw 510]

There doesn't seem to be any justice, redbarn, in your case and in others where the USC was deceived. If you consider the USCIS's point of view, the intent of the I-864 is to prevent the non-USC from becoming a burden on the government (unemployment, medicare, etc). So the burden is on us, as USCs, to do everything we can to ensure that the marriage is entered into in good faith.

I know you are angry and bitter... you have every right to be. We all sign this paperwork and we all take a chance. Unfortunately, some of us get screwed.

I'm very sorry for the loss of your husband and your dream of a life with him.

Jen

This is an excellent topic, DM. Also, another great post, JenT.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

redbarn,

Please don't misunderstand this line of discourse to mean that I don't share your views on how pathetic it is for someone to deceive another. But my point in this thread is focused on the US citizen's obligation to our government to make certain that the alien of his or her choice does not become a burden.

Marriages fail everyday. Marriages between citizens; marriages between aliens, and marriages between citizens and the alien they sponsored. Now aside from clear fraud cases, what triggers a USC to decide that because one obligation (that of fidelity and an exclusive and enduring commitment, as in marriage) made by an alien to a USC has been breached, it is ok for the USC spouse to breach another obligation made to his or her country?

I am probably going to face some discontent with this thread, but I just feel it is necessary to dispell the myth that a USC can simply withdraw his or her obligation made to USCIS under the Affidavit of Support.

Granted, there are legitimate circumstances when the US citizen might be privileged to withdraw sponsorship for an alien, which I am happy to articulate if desired, but what is it with the plethora of posts, recently, and most particularly in this forum, where a US citizen spouse headed for divorce not only asks, but feels that he or she should withdraw the Affidavit of Support for an estranged spouse that has chosen to divorce or has found another love interest?

Surely, before signing the Affidavit of Support in the first place, the US citizen must have realised that it is in place for a purpose, and it is an obligation made that is, for all intents and purposes, irrevocable.

It's surprising to me to see how little an obligation means to many.

I don't consider the obligation a small thing at all! I clearly stated to my fiance what it meant to me financially, emotionally and responsibilty wise. I discussed it with him on numerous occassions. I do understand that responsibilty fully. But I took that responsibilty with the full belief that I would have a husband who believed in WE not HE. I thought I was marring a person to build a future with. Rather I just got royally f..... And even then understanding my financial resposibilty I consitued to talk and assist him with his fiances WHILE he is living with the person who he cheated on me with. Yes you read that correctly! Why because I have a 10 year obligation. But I was taken for a ride. When person is sponcered to come to the US and the they are abused by their spouse they can still apply for citizenship. Well in my case I was taken, I tried everything in my marriage and then in divorce to help this slim then he moves past the one who he is living with an marries another. Where does my govt help me? I have to prove now that is was fraud and hope that he doesn't get approved for a 10 years green card and pray that my responsible might end in only a year.

[redbarn 0]

redbarn,

Please don't misunderstand this line of discourse to mean that I don't share your views on how pathetic it is for someone to deceive another. But my point in this thread is focused on the US citizen's obligation to our government to make certain that the alien of his or her choice does not become a burden.

Marriages fail everyday. Marriages between citizens; marriages between aliens, and marriages between citizens and the alien they sponsored. Now aside from clear fraud cases, what triggers a USC to decide that because one obligation (that of fidelity and an exclusive and enduring commitment, as in marriage) made by an alien to a USC has been breached, it is ok for the USC spouse to breach another obligation made to his or her country?

I hear what you are saying and I get why it was put in placed. So lots of arrangements aren't made for hey I'll pay you 10K to marry me and then we can both walk away after we get divorced. But in my case/our case I have tried everything that is feasible while maintaining functioning. I even took over paying his bills for him to get him back to ground zero. But he burnt me so bad that I can't do anything anymore to help as that would truely hurt me. So I need to call a spade a spade and decide if I want to report him and in doing so possibly eleviate or get rid of the 10 year obligation but in doing so choose to go through hell. To do nothing can cost me thousands with this guy and to report him may emotionally drain me to a point of no return. I understand that he shouldn't become a burden but should it be such a burden to myself that I have to question weather it is worth the emotional drain to report it and attempt to prove my case (of which there certainly is more then I shared). I truely don't know what to do. Has anyone out there reported a case of fraud and been successful??

[diadromous mermaid 36]

redbarn,

Please don't misunderstand this line of discourse to mean that I don't share your views on how pathetic it is for someone to deceive another. But my point in this thread is focused on the US citizen's obligation to our government to make certain that the alien of his or her choice does not become a burden.

Marriages fail everyday. Marriages between citizens; marriages between aliens, and marriages between citizens and the alien they sponsored. Now aside from clear fraud cases, what triggers a USC to decide that because one obligation (that of fidelity and an exclusive and enduring commitment, as in marriage) made by an alien to a USC has been breached, it is ok for the USC spouse to breach another obligation made to his or her country?

I hear what you are saying and I get why it was put in placed. So lots of arrangements aren't made for hey I'll pay you 10K to marry me and then we can both walk away after we get divorced. But in my case/our case I have tried everything that is feasible while maintaining functioning. I even took over paying his bills for him to get him back to ground zero. But he burnt me so bad that I can't do anything anymore to help as that would truely hurt me. So I need to call a spade a spade and decide if I want to report him and in doing so possibly eleviate or get rid of the 10 year obligation but in doing so choose to go through hell. To do nothing can cost me thousands with this guy and to report him may emotionally drain me to a point of no return. I understand that he shouldn't become a burden but should it be such a burden to myself that I have to question weather it is worth the emotional drain to report it and attempt to prove my case (of which there certainly is more then I shared). I truely don't know what to do. Has anyone out there reported a case of fraud and been successful??

Yes.

[morocco4ever 63]

I knew exactly what the I-864 was about, and I have to admit it was a hard one to sign. I have become very tainted with love in the past, and to actually open up and trust a man enough to sign this was not exactly easy.

I remember reading once that someone was able to break the contract, but I don't remember the circumstances. I feel bad for anyone that is mislead in believing that breaking this contract can be easily done by divorce.

One person stated that if he/she remarries that this will break the contract. Is that true????? I didn't think even that would do it.

[rebeccajo 14]

I knew exactly what the I-864 was about, and I have to admit it was a hard one to sign. I have become very tainted with love in the past, and to actually open up and trust a man enough to sign this was not exactly easy.

I remember reading once that someone was able to break the contract, but I don't remember the circumstances. I feel bad for anyone that is mislead in believing that breaking this contract can be easily done by divorce.

One person stated that if he/she remarries that this will break the contract. Is that true????? I didn't think even that would do it.

No, that's false.

[*JG* 2]

It is not 10 years....it's 40 working quarters. Combine yours with theirs and it's really 5 years.

But, yes, I knew the seriousness of it when I signed it.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

It is not 10 years....it's 40 working quarters. Combine yours with theirs and it's really 5 years.

But, yes, I knew the seriousness of it when I signed it.

Well, that is true Jomo's girl, only if the couple remain married. If the alien and UC divorce before the SSA makes the determination that the 40 quarter has been satisfied, then the alien would not be afforded credit for an ex-spouse's work contribution.

[*JG* 2]

It is not 10 years....it's 40 working quarters. Combine yours with theirs and it's really 5 years.

But, yes, I knew the seriousness of it when I signed it.

Well, that is true Jomo's girl, only if the couple remain married. If the alien and UC divorce before the SSA makes the determination that the 40 quarter has been satisfied, then the alien would not be afforded credit for an ex-spouse's work contribution.

Interesting twist there that I did not know.

[morocco4ever 63]

It is not 10 years....it's 40 working quarters. Combine yours with theirs and it's really 5 years.

But, yes, I knew the seriousness of it when I signed it.

Well, that is true Jomo's girl, only if the couple remain married. If the alien and UC divorce before the SSA makes the determination that the 40 quarter has been satisfied, then the alien would not be afforded credit for an ex-spouse's work contribution.

Interesting twist there that I did not know.

That is an interesting twist. So if the petitioner marries a loser and a user she is really slammed hard. Wow. Even more reason to really get to know someone before you marry them.

[justashooter 430]

That is an interesting twist. So if the petitioner marries a loser and a user she is really slammed hard. Wow. Even more reason to really get to know someone before you marry them.

it is interesting to see that the OP is of the opinion that when a USC marries a foreigner that they are morally obligated to support someone who choses to leave their life. i would guess that the OP is a foreigner who has done or is looking to do the same. this opinion evidences a sense of entitlement that is the mark of an immature persona, avoidant of personal responsibility in the matter.

the OP places the burden for support on the USC, citing the interest of the USCIS, rather than citing the interest of the immigree. funny, in light of the fact that it is usually the immigree who is served (through a process of coercion - a nice word for extortion). this kind of disposition of responsibility is a commonly seen in diagnosis of borderline personality disorder.

this disorder is a psychiatric condition catalouged in the DSMIV as axis 1 (major mental illness), but was formerly catalouged as axis 2 (personality disorder). the DSMIV was written for americans who, being from an economically mature society, have a greater sense of personal responsibility than most immigrees from underdeveloped economies. cultural differences...