who would have thought it's so true

[B'sA 0]

Hi, everybody!

My soul is so weary right now, that i just couldn't keep all that for myself tonight.

I miss my family alot. I think i'm going to get sick- this is how much i miss all of them.

I'm thinking sometimes that i won't make it.

I don't know... But i love my baby madly!

My God, why did i have to make such a horrible choice...between my family and my love?

God, please, show i'm strong! 'cause if i'm not, than i'm going to die of sadness and heavy heart...

Sorry, folks, you can move it to the off-topic, but this is the mtf moving and living in AMERICA

[Marilyn. 340]

yeah it is a hard decision to make...

I really miss my family too.. I have a couple of younger siblings that I feel like I totally missed out on them growing up, my little sister just turned 13, when I left she was only 10... two of my other brother or around 17, 18 now... they are almost men... I feel like I don't really know them at all...

[Kamaboko 0]

When my brother was 12, I left my family for going to uni in another town. Now he's 17 and I miss watching all his growing ups. It's sad. Just like you, I feel like I don't really know him. It's so sad

  *Marilyn* said:

yeah it is a hard decision to make...

I really miss my family too.. I have a couple of younger siblings that I feel like I totally missed out on them growing up, my little sister just turned 13, when I left she was only 10... two of my other brother or around 17, 18 now... they are almost men... I feel like I don't really know them at all...

[stardusted 0]

When I moved away from home I felt the same way and it took me many, many months to start to deal with leaving my family and living in this new place. It takes time, for some it takes longer than for others, especially if visits can only be done once a year and the country you're from is so different from America. I really did want nothing more than to go home, but I decided to stay the year I had committed to, and when it came time to leave, my heart broke all over again. Be patient with yourself and with each other, and try to fill your time with things you enjoy. Remember that it's okay to feel this sad.

[wifetobe 2]

  BryantAliona said:

Hi, everybody!

My soul is so weary right now, that i just couldn't keep all that for myself tonight.

I miss my family alot. I think i'm going to get sick- this is how much i miss all of them.

I'm thinking sometimes that i won't make it.

I don't know... But i love my baby madly!

My God, why did i have to make such a horrible choice...between my family and my love?

God, please, show i'm strong! 'cause if i'm not, than i'm going to die of sadness and heavy heart...

Sorry, folks, you can move it to the off-topic, but this is the mtf moving and living in AMERICA

It's been since July 10 since you left your family..(couldn't help but read your timeline!) It will only get easier when you fully submit to the reality you are in now and that is married to a wonderful husband that loves you and will love you for the rest of your life. Your family will always be there to support you, and if it makes you feel better write your family a 'thinking of you' or 'missing you' card every week or get online and send them a free e-card.. or think of going back home to your family.. I think you would feel better knowing you can never leave your love!!

[Big Papa Zone 93]

I feel really sorry for you peeps from close-knit families when it comes to leaving for good. I come from a dysfucntional family that I couldn't give a monkey's chuff about, and the only thing I'll be sorry to leave behind is my good job.

[tom&tata 2]

It was hard for us too, especially the 1st year. It made my husband felt "guilty" for taking me away from my family. I was lucky that I got a job right away so I was back into "normal life" routine in a short time. It takes a lot of patience from both of us to deal with it.

But leaving again after 2 weeks vacation was also difficult, especially after seeing how old your parents look now, your nephew is becoming young man, seeing niece 1st time in 2 years etc. You feel you are missing a lot.

I am beginning to think US is now also my home, but I still call Indonesia home. Our adjustment is not done yet - it's just getting easier.

Edited September 17, 2008 by tom&tata

[wifetobe 2]

  Damian P said:

I feel really sorry for you peeps from close-knit families when it comes to leaving for good. I come from a dysfucntional family that I couldn't give a monkey's chuff about, and the only thing I'll be sorry to leave behind is my good job.

:lol: I haven't laughed like this in a long while..pissing myself with laughter over here!! OMG spot on ME TOO!!!!

[Marilyn. 340]

  Ranie and Glen said:

When my brother was 12, I left my family for going to uni in another town. Now he's 17 and I miss watching all his growing ups. It's sad. Just like you, I feel like I don't really know him. It's so sad

  *Marilyn* said:

yeah it is a hard decision to make...

I really miss my family too.. I have a couple of younger siblings that I feel like I totally missed out on them growing up, my little sister just turned 13, when I left she was only 10... two of my other brother or around 17, 18 now... they are almost men... I feel like I don't really know them at all...

I almost feel like I deserted them which essentially I did

[tom&tata 2]

  *Marilyn* said:

  Ranie and Glen said:

When my brother was 12, I left my family for going to uni in another town. Now he's 17 and I miss watching all his growing ups. It's sad. Just like you, I feel like I don't really know him. It's so sad

  *Marilyn* said:

yeah it is a hard decision to make...

I really miss my family too.. I have a couple of younger siblings that I feel like I totally missed out on them growing up, my little sister just turned 13, when I left she was only 10... two of my other brother or around 17, 18 now... they are almost men... I feel like I don't really know them at all...

I almost feel like I deserted them which essentially I did

Off Topid: How's the new job Marilyn?

[Mononoke28 137]

  BryantAliona said:

Hi, everybody!

My soul is so weary right now, that i just couldn't keep all that for myself tonight.

I miss my family alot. I think i'm going to get sick- this is how much i miss all of them.

I'm thinking sometimes that i won't make it.

I don't know... But i love my baby madly!

My God, why did i have to make such a horrible choice...between my family and my love?

God, please, show i'm strong! 'cause if i'm not, than i'm going to die of sadness and heavy heart...

Sorry, folks, you can move it to the off-topic, but this is the mtf moving and living in AMERICA

I totally understand how you feel, you feel like you're drowning in sorrow or can't even breathe from the sadness you feel. But like other people said here, it'll get easier with time even though that feeling never goes away. It's a hard decision that most people who come to the US have to make, so remember that you're not alone in this and try to make the best out of it while you're here with your husband.

You can also try to plan a trip to go back and see your family. That's always a good think to look forward to.

Diana

[B'sA 0]

Thanks to all of you, guys!

Not only you have been a huge help during the k1 process, but you're keeping on brighting up my mind now!

You are so great, guys!

[eric_and_teresa 10]

OP, I love the picture on your avatar!

Back on the topic, I have not even moved yet but I can just see myself feeling exactly how you are feeling now.

Last time my fiance and I said good bye, I was crying a little less than usual because the thought of us being together in month, and not having to say good bye again made me feel better, but then I thought, next time I'll be sad too because I'll be saying good bye to my family and friends. So just like you said it, I'll always want to be where I'm not

I too have a 14 year old brother, and I'm gonna miss him the most! We are very close and he cried during our engagement dinner, I can only imagine how hard its going to be to say good bye.

I just try to prepare myself, being aware that I'm gonna be very sad for sure and that it is OK to have those feelings for a while, but at some point I'm sure we will all get used to being away from our homes, because we'll be starting our new home with the person we love.

For those who have already moved, how long did it take you to adjust to your new life?

Edited September 18, 2008 by eric_and_teresa

[Nutty 2]

I feel the same way! And I'm an American!

Just want to leave this place!

  BryantAliona said:

Hi, everybody!

My soul is so weary right now, that i just couldn't keep all that for myself tonight.

I miss my family alot. I think i'm going to get sick- this is how much i miss all of them.

I'm thinking sometimes that i won't make it.

I don't know... But i love my baby madly!

My God, why did i have to make such a horrible choice...between my family and my love?

God, please, show i'm strong! 'cause if i'm not, than i'm going to die of sadness and heavy heart...

Sorry, folks, you can move it to the off-topic, but this is the mtf moving and living in AMERICA

[B'sA 0]

  eric_and_teresa said:

OP, I love the picture on your avatar!

Back on the topic, I have not even moved yet but I can just see myself feeling exactly how you are feeling now.

Last time my fiance and I said good bye, I was crying a little less than usual because the thought of us being together in month, and not having to say good bye again made me feel better, but then I thought, next time I'll be sad too because I'll be saying good bye to my family and friends. So just like you said it, I'll always want to be where I'm not

I too have a 14 year old brother, and I'm gonna miss him the most! We are very close and he cried during our engagement dinner, I can only imagine how hard its going to be to say good bye.

I just try to prepare myself, being aware that I'm gonna be very sad for sure and that it is OK to have those feelings for a while, but at some point I'm sure we will all get used to being away from our homes, because we'll be starting our new home with the person we love.

For those who have already moved, how long did it take you to adjust to your new life?

Thanks, Teresa!

And to make a clarification- i don't feel like that all the time, probably nobody does, it's just that sometimes these thoughts are killing you. Sometimes you can't help it and you could give anything to go home and BE there. I talk to my family everyday on skype, but that don' take away from the sadness you're not going to share the holiday dinners, birthday partys, new year, Christmas and so on.

...and my nice who's 3 year old is going to forget how much we used to kick it, oh...did we have fun with her or what!

But we do have to follow our sole mates, in joy and sorrow...