Sub-Saharan cyber cafe # 2

[stevi1123 0]

I appreciate all the input from you all who already have your men (and women) here. It is such a good preparation for us who are still waiting. Thank you so much for "paving the way" for us.

[Zee Bee 61]

Bassi has started calling me "babe". "Hey babe" when he answers the phone. I think he learns from his friends. He's made a few friends here. I think men make friends more easily or something. But he's selective so he's got two new good friends and then a few acquaintances and footballers that he hangs with. They are all immigrants, but not all african.

I really think once he starts working it'll be a huge help for him and his adjustment. His confidence will increase, he'll feel more in control and I don't want to think about the language differences he'll bring home. It should be interesting.

We call each other "babe" too. I think I started it and he picked it up

Inusah works with 3 other African immigrants (Liberia, Senegal and Nigeria). I know that he and the Nigerian guy hang out a lot at work. He also works with a Vietnamese, an Italian and his boss is Greek. He says its like working at the UN.

But I have seen a difference since he started working. Even though he comes home late and has to work Saturdays ( ) I can tell that he feels like he is contributing instead of just sitting at home. The bad thing is that he has yet to go for his DL (we have excellent public transportation in Philly) and he needs to carve out some time to take the GRE (Actually, we both have to )

Its going to be so interesting when we are both back in school

[Ta Ta 1]

Nice to read all the comments from everybody.

@ the guys changing their English...........I made a mess out of the word Minestrone soup when I was talking to a client, I called it

mine strone like mine and strone............she was laughing so hard at me ..........after 30 years in the US, I still mess up sometimes and laugh at myself.

Stevi, no word on the window saga yet. Too busy to keep checking on them this week. Got to get my CEU's in for my renewel of my massage state

license and am going to class today.

I also voted for the very first time as a USC I almost teared up at the polls.

Decorating : Bedroom is done in sage and black furniture. Palms. Mirrors. Light fixtures that throw soft light rays all throughout the room.

Kitchen : I want a warm and cozy welcoming " coffee shop look " with chocolate / rust / amber colors. I may paint each wall a different color and

bring it together with an eclectic painting that draws all the colors together.

Bathroom : cool blues.

Guest rooms : don't know yet.

Now I need the time to finish it

[stevi1123 0]

Omoba, sounds like you have an artistic flare about you. I love the color schemes you mention. Also, I have a few close associates who are massage therapists and they too have artistic qualities. There has got to be some correlation there somewhere.

That's also funny about what you said about minestrone.

And Taiwo has started calling me baby on the telephone at times. It is so funny the way he says it, because he puts the accent on the second syllable. It sounds like BabEEE. It is so cute. He says "Hello my BabEEE" and it cracks me up (but I don't let him hear me laughing). I can't wait til he gets here

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

Nice to read all the comments from everybody.

@ the guys changing their English...........I made a mess out of the word Minestrone soup when I was talking to a client, I called it

mine strone like mine and strone............she was laughing so hard at me ..........after 30 years in the US, I still mess up sometimes and laugh at myself.

Stevi, no word on the window saga yet. Too busy to keep checking on them this week. Got to get my CEU's in for my renewel of my massage state

license and am going to class today.

I also voted for the very first time as a USC I almost teared up at the polls.

Decorating : Bedroom is done in sage and black furniture. Palms. Mirrors. Light fixtures that throw soft light rays all throughout the room.

Kitchen : I want a warm and cozy welcoming " coffee shop look " with chocolate / rust / amber colors. I may paint each wall a different color and

bring it together with an eclectic painting that draws all the colors together.

Bathroom : cool blues.

Guest rooms : don't know yet.

Now I need the time to finish it

My bedroom is green too. Both Bassi and my favorite color is green, so no problem choosing there. The furniture is light pecan maple wood. He deferred to me on the color of the furniture. Old house so no overhead lighting, only lamps which actually works out fine for us. And three huge windows, so lots of natural light and I put up alternating cream and sage green sheers with heavy green panels anchoring the ends so that I don't stop too much of the natural light from entering and it looks like that whole wall is windows. Although, Bassi likes to sleep in the dark, so now he sleeps with the blanket over his head. I also took an old coffee table and put it at the end of the bed as a bench and sewed a seat cushion to put on top of it. Bassi loves it and I feel so "Martha Stewart"! My bedroom is very comfy and I even have a nice cream rocking chair in the corner for reading and _{future babies}.

[Simply_Uno 1]

Nice to read all the comments from everybody.

@ the guys changing their English...........I made a mess out of the word Minestrone soup when I was talking to a client, I called it

mine strone like mine and strone............she was laughing so hard at me ..........after 30 years in the US, I still mess up sometimes and laugh at myself.

Stevi, no word on the window saga yet. Too busy to keep checking on them this week. Got to get my CEU's in for my renewel of my massage state

license and am going to class today.

I also voted for the very first time as a USC I almost teared up at the polls.

Decorating : Bedroom is done in sage and black furniture. Palms. Mirrors. Light fixtures that throw soft light rays all throughout the room.

Kitchen : I want a warm and cozy welcoming " coffee shop look " with chocolate / rust / amber colors. I may paint each wall a different color and

bring it together with an eclectic painting that draws all the colors together.

Bathroom : cool blues.

Guest rooms : don't know yet.

Now I need the time to finish it

My bedroom is green too. Both Bassi and my favorite color is green, so no problem choosing there. The furniture is light pecan maple wood. He deferred to me on the color of the furniture. Old house so no overhead lighting, only lamps which actually works out fine for us. And three huge windows, so lots of natural light and I put up alternating cream and sage green sheers with heavy green panels anchoring the ends so that I don't stop too much of the natural light from entering and it looks like that whole wall is windows. Although, Bassi likes to sleep in the dark, so now he sleeps with the blanket over his head. I also took an old coffee table and put it at the end of the bed as a bench and sewed a seat cushion to put on top of it. Bassi loves it and I feel so "Martha Stewart"! My bedroom is very comfy and I even have a nice cream rocking chair in the corner for reading and _{future babies}.

[Ta Ta 1]

Nice to read all the comments from everybody.

@ the guys changing their English...........I made a mess out of the word Minestrone soup when I was talking to a client, I called it

mine strone like mine and strone............she was laughing so hard at me ..........after 30 years in the US, I still mess up sometimes and laugh at myself.

Stevi, no word on the window saga yet. Too busy to keep checking on them this week. Got to get my CEU's in for my renewel of my massage state

license and am going to class today.

I also voted for the very first time as a USC I almost teared up at the polls.

Decorating : Bedroom is done in sage and black furniture. Palms. Mirrors. Light fixtures that throw soft light rays all throughout the room.

Kitchen : I want a warm and cozy welcoming " coffee shop look " with chocolate / rust / amber colors. I may paint each wall a different color and

bring it together with an eclectic painting that draws all the colors together.

Bathroom : cool blues.

Guest rooms : don't know yet.

Now I need the time to finish it

My bedroom is green too. Both Bassi and my favorite color is green, so no problem choosing there. The furniture is light pecan maple wood. He deferred to me on the color of the furniture. Old house so no overhead lighting, only lamps which actually works out fine for us. And three huge windows, so lots of natural light and I put up alternating cream and sage green sheers with heavy green panels anchoring the ends so that I don't stop too much of the natural light from entering and it looks like that whole wall is windows. Although, Bassi likes to sleep in the dark, so now he sleeps with the blanket over his head. I also took an old coffee table and put it at the end of the bed as a bench and sewed a seat cushion to put on top of it. Bassi loves it and I feel so "Martha Stewart"! My bedroom is very comfy and I even have a nice cream rocking chair in the corner for reading and _{future babies}.

Bassi Steward .........

You need to check out the new microfiber alternative down comforter Sears got in sage / creme reversible. I got one and it is

faaaabuuulous ! Sooooo soft. Fully machine washable and on sale right now. I don't sleep under sheets ( a German thing ) but directly under a thin comforter and then a blanket

and the main comforter on top , with windows open. Anyway, the color sage / creme is so pretty. I also got a blue / green one.

They are sage on one side and creme or blue on the other.

[Ta Ta 1]

Omoba, sounds like you have an artistic flare about you. I love the color schemes you mention. Also, I have a few close associates who are massage therapists and they too have artistic qualities. There has got to be some correlation there somewhere.

That's also funny about what you said about minestrone.

And Taiwo has started calling me baby on the telephone at times. It is so funny the way he says it, because he puts the accent on the second syllable. It sounds like BabEEE. It is so cute. He says "Hello my BabEEE" and it cracks me up (but I don't let him hear me laughing). I can't wait til he gets here

I guess we are 'feelers' and have a strong sense for an aesteticaly pleasing and relaxing environment where we 'feel' good.

I am not that artistic but my offspring is an art teacher married to a graphic designer at a museum .

[Ta Ta 1]

Nice to read all the comments from everybody.

@ the guys changing their English...........I made a mess out of the word Minestrone soup when I was talking to a client, I called it

mine strone like mine and strone............she was laughing so hard at me ..........after 30 years in the US, I still mess up sometimes and laugh at myself.

Stevi, no word on the window saga yet. Too busy to keep checking on them this week. Got to get my CEU's in for my renewel of my massage state

license and am going to class today.

I also voted for the very first time as a USC I almost teared up at the polls.

Decorating : Bedroom is done in sage and black furniture. Palms. Mirrors. Light fixtures that throw soft light rays all throughout the room.

Kitchen : I want a warm and cozy welcoming " coffee shop look " with chocolate / rust / amber colors. I may paint each wall a different color and

bring it together with an eclectic painting that draws all the colors together.

Bathroom : cool blues.

Guest rooms : don't know yet.

Now I need the time to finish it

My bedroom is green too. Both Bassi and my favorite color is green, so no problem choosing there. The furniture is light pecan maple wood. He deferred to me on the color of the furniture. Old house so no overhead lighting, only lamps which actually works out fine for us. And three huge windows, so lots of natural light and I put up alternating cream and sage green sheers with heavy green panels anchoring the ends so that I don't stop too much of the natural light from entering and it looks like that whole wall is windows. Although, Bassi likes to sleep in the dark, so now he sleeps with the blanket over his head. I also took an old coffee table and put it at the end of the bed as a bench and sewed a seat cushion to put on top of it. Bassi loves it and I feel so "Martha Stewart"! My bedroom is very comfy and I even have a nice cream rocking chair in the corner for reading and _{future babies}.

Ah thanks UNO, I never even SAW that ..... she almost sneaked it past me

[Ta Ta 1]

OK back to the misunderstandings .........I have a problem with my SO understanding something

I am at my witts end , God love him , but he does not get it.

It goes like this :

He says something and I THINK I heard him correctly at the time.

Then later I realize he did NOT say that......even though I THOUGHT I heard him correctly.

Next he gets a little annoyed with me because as he puts it " when I don't understand something correctly I must ask for him to repeat it."

Well...duh...I do that already if I don't understand what he means BUT HOWEVER ......IF I think that at the time I heard correctly why on earth would I feel the need to ask for clarificationnnnn ????? I say I thought I heard you 100% correctly ......then he goes off and says you always think you are 100% right all the time just ask me to repeat .........aaaagggghhhh........ how can I get this through his head ? It happened 3 times recently and I am about to pull my hair out.

I told him he should take a bit of responsibility to repeat what he is trying to say instead of "do whatever you want to do ".

But I guess he thinks I really got it and am being stubborn.

Geez I hope I didn't confuse anyone now.

So what else can I say so he understands I THOUGHT I heard him correctly and therefore didn't think I needed clarification ?

I am exhausted just from typing this !

[Simply_Uno 1]

sadly enuff, me and that man had the exact same misunderstandings. and his response was typical of what you just wrote Omoba. and I had to tell him, its not about being 100% right,

its about CLARIFICATION, GOSH DARN YOU!!!! okay, as you all were.

p.s. how many of y'all know I cleaned up that conversation

[stevi1123 0]

Omoba, I have to read over that again to completely understand it, since I am also listening to the election coverage and crying at the same time.

but

We have a communication issue with the word THINK. If I tell him I am "thinking" about something, he reads this as "worrying" about something. For almost 2 years, we have had this problem. I KEEP TRYING TO EXPLAIN to him that "thinking" just means exactly what the word implies. And that "worrying" means just that. It is getting a little better, but this really does get to me sometimes. The main problem is because he is so spiritual (and so am I) that he does not believe ANYTHING should be worried about. I mean, I'm all for "if you pray, don't worry and if you worry, you must not be praying" but sometimes, IT FEELS GOOD TO WORRY!

That sounds sort of strange, but it is hard to explain. Meaning, that some issues in life DESERVE deep contemplation and merit "concern." Therefore, I believe that equates to there being cause to WORRY about some things.

I don't know how to explain this, because as I am writing it, I feel as foolish as I feel when I am trying to explain this to Taiwo. Maybe somebody out there can understand my point of view.......

Or maybe it's just ME

[Ta Ta 1]

It sounds like some ways we communicate don't get through.... it will take however long it will take I guess over and over again to understand each other in some issues.

Maybe Stevi , you can just not say think and replace it with contemplate.

We always talk it out in the end and come to some agreement but I honestly believe he does not " get it " when I say there is no need to ask for clarification if I thought at the time I heard him correctly.

It's like why walk around with an umbrella if the sun shines..........mmhhh maybe he will understand if I speak this in parables. It worked before.

I tell a story like a parable to get my point across. I will try it again.

Or I make Pingo a very rich company and ask for feedback with EVERYTHING he says.

[Perseverance 1]

hey all,

Today started out beautiful; sun shining, cool breezes, leaves falling, could not ask for more.

Then I had an appt with the lawyer (divorce). This man was as old as time and slower than cold molasses.

I swear, he should have been convelescing. It took him an hour and a half just to go over 6 sheets of paper, (mind you, most of it was "dna" or "none").

I kept asking him, "you want me to fill those in for ya?" and he kept saying "no, you just have to sign at a later date."

I'm like "geesh, can you move much slower, I really do want to sit here in dead silence with ya buddie!"

So when he finishes, he tells me, "welp, young lady, I look forward to meeting with you later."

I wanted to bite my toe nails off!" I was so ready to leave. But on a lighter note, I'm getting it done...finally.

Then, I had to contend with my grandmothers banking issues; she died two months ago today. Her health insurance company is still taking out the monthly premiums from her account and now its in the negative. When I tried to talk to them, they told me and I quote "ma'am, I need your grandmothers consent before I can discuss this account with you, is she available?" I'm like "umm, did you not understand me when I said she is deceased?" the rep then stated, "I heard you, but she still needs to give consent."

#######

7 years ago, my best friends husband died, he did not leave her in the best financial situation (no one "plans" to die unexpectantly) any way the bill collectors were calling and driving her crazy, same kind of senario, they would NOT comprehend that he was dead.... so one day she snapped, she gave them a "forwarding address" to where he could be found (the address to the cemetery where he was laid to rest including the plot number!!) "good luck getting anything out of him" she told them. She said to me "I know it was wrong...but I just could not take it anymore...my husband is dead...cant I get some kind of peace so I can mourn him?"

These kind of people deserve a real live ....

[Ta Ta 1]

looks like we did it................yayyyyyyyyy for Obama :dancing: :dancing: :dancing: :dance: :dance: :dance: :dance: :dance: