Women,does your spouse help you with finances for the visa process or are you doing it alone?

[scurpide 0]

Hello.

My husband is the US citizen and he is the one paying everything on my visa processing. What i just did was prepare all the necessary documents, had the medical, do the payment of the visa fee and the document verification. I cant finance myself as of the moment because i am currently studying which my husband is also the one supporting me. I always told him where the money he sent goes and we dont hide what feels specially if it is about money matters.

In your part, since that you are the woman studying and paying for your husbands visa processing you should tell him that he needs to do his part also in preparing things and be part of the payment unless he doesnt have any job. Just be open to him about what you feel about your situation..

Take care..

[parissara 0]

Hey ! my fiance ( U.S citizen) He paid for apply K-1 visa 455$ and ticket when he visited me, but when he came here here we share money the same pocket, no your money and no my money but Our money..He sent me money some month but I am the one who told him to not send me money because I am still working while wating for my k1 visa and have enough budget here in Thailand. I and my fiance we are share money and evrything right now.

[ria_s 0]

lMy USC hubby paid for his trips here, hotel fees, wedding, honeymoon, etc. I paid for whatever little things that really didn't amount to much, i.e fare, snacks, getting the BC and CENOMAR and all that. He's back home now getting ready to do the paperwork for us, which he says he'll be paying for. He also sends me money to help out with whatever needs to be done in terms of paperwork and expenses at my end, and yes even urges me to watch movies so I don't get bored. My hubby is wonderful, but I try not to make him spend for every little thing.

Maybe you just don't feel like he understands the money situation from your point of view. Maybe he doesn't have much, but him having better understanding and sympathy would go a long way to smooth any ruffled feathers. Try telling him how things stand with you financially..

[kk_mine 0]

I am in the US and I am paying for everything. It is Very hard and frustrating at times because I am doing everything but I know he can't help me out with the cost. He did buy our rings and have them made. I felt bad as my aunt just the other day told me that she feels if I do everything now it starts off bad in the marriage, as he will feel I will provide all the time. But I know my fiance and I know he would not do that to me. He always says how he feels bad that he can't afford to help me. He says that the man should take care of the woman and when we are together he will work very hard for Us. I have even picked up a second job. It is taking me a lil longer as I have to take care of everything. But I love him very much and I will do whatever to be with him! My aunt feels like your dad.. what kind of man wants a wife and he can't afford to take care of you now she said? I tried expln to her, but I don't think it helped much. *we are not married yet but the Whole process I will be paying for start to finish...*

Hello! I am the female, US citizen and he is the Pakistani citizen awaiting an NOA2. Ok, my question is did any of your spouses help out with the financial side of the visa processing or did you have to do it alone? My spouse kept telling me he would send $ to help, but he never did. He has been saying he would send $120 (which I consider a modest amount but I thought it'd be nice for him to help me atleast to show he cared) but he has not sent me one penny. I feel hurt, but I know he does not have a lot of $ in American terms. But, he did tell me he'd do it but then never does so it makes me feel he is ungrateful because I have kids and he always says I never call him, etc. But, all my $ is invested in the lawyer and this immigration process. Also, in Islam the man is supposed to take care of the woman; not the other way around. My dad says he is not a "fit" husband and that when he gets here he will want me to take care of him and he feels I have married the wrong man. So, I need advice here especially from females....because I think men are the ones paying for their wives expenses here anyway. But, for the women are you paying for your man's expenses or is helping you out? Please reply ASAP!

Mahitab

Edited October 2, 2008 by kk_mine

[ladybee 0]

haha, that's what a real marriage is all about.. I'll take the burden for now (and probably for a year or two when she comes).. she still has to go to school, and of course, find a job.. then we can have kids and start a family together..

There is nothing to "make up".. if you love each other that much, it doesn't matter..

My husband is almost fluent in English already. But, he will go to school to get a degree here of course. I agree it is 50/50 but I do not feel like he appreciates what I do for him. He acts like I "had" to pay it out of my savings. That it was something I had no choice but to do for him. I did it because I wanted to have him here with me but I feel he is not caring. I could not even afford to buy things I needed at that time because the lawyer fee was so costly. My husband had promised to pay half but let me down and never wants to talk about it or bring it up. I feel like he does not understand that a college student has books to buy and other expenses. Also, I was depending on the $ from him to put back in my account for my children. It was a small amount to ask from him, yet he still let me down.

M.

That is why I told my fiance when he gets here he will have to Work his A** off for me . te he he cause i paid for everything.

[Completely 3]

Hello! I am the female, US citizen and he is the Pakistani citizen awaiting an NOA2. Ok, my question is did any of your spouses help out with the financial side of the visa processing or did you have to do it alone? My spouse kept telling me he would send $ to help, but he never did. He has been saying he would send $120 (which I consider a modest amount but I thought it'd be nice for him to help me atleast to show he cared) but he has not sent me one penny. I feel hurt, but I know he does not have a lot of $ in American terms. But, he did tell me he'd do it but then never does so it makes me feel he is ungrateful because I have kids and he always says I never call him, etc. But, all my $ is invested in the lawyer and this immigration process. Also, in Islam the man is supposed to take care of the woman; not the other way around. My dad says he is not a "fit" husband and that when he gets here he will want me to take care of him and he feels I have married the wrong man. So, I need advice here especially from females....because I think men are the ones paying for their wives expenses here anyway. But, for the women are you paying for your man's expenses or is helping you out? Please reply ASAP!

Mahitab

My husband spent everything on the visa process up to my citizenship.. Since we are married now, I help him 50/50 in our everyday expenses..

You have to understand that in Pakistan their curency is very low compare to european and other countries.. It will be very difficult for him to provide or help you in the expenses.. Probably once you get married and he has a job, he will help you financially.

You should know all the consequences before marrying him..When you love someone you dont expect anything in return, even in your belief is opposite on what is happening right now..

You should be worried if the visa will get denied and you and him will not able to be together.. He is your husband through good times and bad times you should help one another.

Edited October 2, 2008 by Completely

[Mononoke28 134]

I think it depends on the finances of everyone involved. I knew from the very beginning that my husband could not afford any fees or expenses related to the visa process, so I paid of everything even if he offerd to pay for some of it. If I had known that he earned a good salary or had plenty of money in his bank account, then yes, I would've accepted his offer to pay for some of the expenses. These are things that need to be discussed before anything is filed.

Diana

[justagirl24 0]

We pay for everything.

Isn't that what marriages are about? The We part?

[bhajishah 4]

Uhhmm Pakistan has a very struggling economy. the bills are almost the same as ours but the pay. hahahahah unreal.. so its a leap of faith. Most of the gori pk marriages i have seen arevery good and the man gives all the money for the family here as well as help out the family back home. You are married so why question it???? Thats what im wondering......You are going to create more problems for yourself with these types of questioning of relationship.

[Mononoke28 134]

You are married so why question it???? Thats what im wondering......You are going to create more problems for yourself with these types of questioning of relationship.

I agree.

Diana

[WonTanNara 0]

Why is it that so many people see "being taken care of" as a financial thing?

My fiance is from Guinea and can fit all of his earthly possessions into one suitcase. I've paid for absolutely everything and I will continue to support him in Africa through this entire process because he just wouldn't be able to foot the bill himself. If all I cared about was a man "taking care of me" (ie paying for everything) then I would have walked away from an amazing person that has so much to offer and loves me very much. I also have no expectation of him "making it all up to me" because this is a partnership. He hasn't been able to contribute any money, but he's contributed and taken care of me in many other ways. I'm sure he'll also contribute when he's here whether it involves money or not. But, we are not keeping track...

[LadyT 0]

I thought I would respond to your question since I didn't see any posts responding to you. My husband and I have been married since Feb 16th and lives in Jamaica. He has helped me with all of the expenses. We try to split them. He even went out and got us an apartment (because I visit each month) since he was previously living with family. Originally we were to split the cost for renting the apartment, but he manages to handle that on his own. I think if he's not showing me that he will try and provide and help, then he will be that same way once he comes to the U.S. Since you mentioned you have children THEY ARE YOUR FIRST PRIORITY. He should probably at least do all the calling and cover that charge while you hold down everything else. Talk to him about it. Don't set yourself up.

I hope this helps you. Take care.