Affair while Married

[RandyM 0]

A friend is in this situation, any suggestion?

He is married for past 7 years.

While 4 years into the marriage he met a girl oversees while he was on a trip, she was on holiday away from her country.

They met casually and started talking, via email and phone, he meet her every few months in the past and the present.

Anyway, friendship turned to extramarital affair, and feeling developed within the first year they met. He continued with his marriage and lead this life till now. This affair led to a 2 year old baby girl.

His marriage is just not going anywhere, (they live in the same house separately). He is thinking about divorcing, and marrying her, and file for fiancee visa. This is genuine relationship and with a child.

This is a complex and serious question, please let me know, what he should do. I-129F asked for a proof of meeting in the last 2 years, and past divorce decree, and how met. How should he answer or fill out the forms? During Embassy interview, if I129F is approved, do you think they will ask about his character and question her about baby without marriage, or, having an affair with married man? Could this scenario be a reason in denied K1/K2 visa?

Or should he just furnish proof met, and I-129F show baby as K2.

Thanks,

Randy

[tallcoolone 102]

From what I understand:

Requirments are having meet in the past two years.

Bring in the divorce papers and your "Friend" should be good.....

[wifetobe 2]

A friend is in this situation, any suggestion?

He is married for past 7 years.

While 4 years into the marriage he met a girl oversees while he was on a trip, she was on holiday away from her country.

They met casually and started talking, via email and phone, he meet her every few months in the past and the present.

Anyway, friendship turned to extramarital affair, and feeling developed within the first year they met. He continued with his marriage and lead this life till now. This affair led to a 2 year old baby girl.

His marriage is just not going anywhere, (they live in the same house separately). He is thinking about divorcing, and marrying her, and file for fiancee visa. This is genuine relationship and with a child.

This is a complex and serious question, please let me know, what he should do. I-129F asked for a proof of meeting in the last 2 years, and past divorce decree, and how met. How should he answer or fill out the forms? During Embassy interview, if I129F is approved, do you think they will ask about his character and question her about baby without marriage, or, having an affair with married man? Could this scenario be a reason in denied K1/K2 visa?

Or should he just furnish proof met, and I-129F show baby as K2.

Thanks,

Randy

Depending on where he lives most consulates will not ask about characters/baby without marriage etc. Which country does he live in? A K1 denial is not based upon personal circumstances ie issues in a marriage/infidelity etc. that I've ever heard on this site. A denial is based on if you do not meet the requirements of a K1. In your case you won't be denied unless you are able to financially support and meet the minimum wage requirements, that you have met within the past two years and you are both free to marry. He is not free to marry at this stage so the K1 does not apply. I would advise him to get divorced, wait til he receives his divorce decree and then apply for a K1. There isn't a way to fill out the forms, only fill in the forms truthfully otherwise harsh consequences shall follow.

[RandyM 0]

Thanks,

You are mentioning follow I-129f , If he follow, only think he have to mention is the name and date of prior marriages, and the letter how we met, they are just looking to see if we met in the past 2 years. Well there is a big event took place. infidelity, how that supposed to be submitted or is this out of their guideline.

Thank agan

A friend is in this situation, any suggestion?

He is married for past 7 years.

While 4 years into the marriage he met a girl oversees while he was on a trip, she was on holiday away from her country.

They met casually and started talking, via email and phone, he meet her every few months in the past and the present.

Anyway, friendship turned to extramarital affair, and feeling developed within the first year they met. He continued with his marriage and lead this life till now. This affair led to a 2 year old baby girl.

His marriage is just not going anywhere, (they live in the same house separately). He is thinking about divorcing, and marrying her, and file for fiancee visa. This is genuine relationship and with a child.

This is a complex and serious question, please let me know, what he should do. I-129F asked for a proof of meeting in the last 2 years, and past divorce decree, and how met. How should he answer or fill out the forms? During Embassy interview, if I129F is approved, do you think they will ask about his character and question her about baby without marriage, or, having an affair with married man? Could this scenario be a reason in denied K1/K2 visa?

Or should he just furnish proof met, and I-129F show baby as K2.

Thanks,

Randy

Depending on where he lives most consulates will not ask about characters/baby without marriage etc. Which country does he live in? A K1 denial is not based upon personal circumstances ie issues in a marriage/infidelity etc. that I've ever heard on this site. A denial is based on if you do not meet the requirements of a K1. In your case you won't be denied unless you are able to financially support and meet the minimum wage requirements, that you have met within the past two years and you are both free to marry. He is not free to marry at this stage so the K1 does not apply. I would advise him to get divorced, wait til he receives his divorce decree and then apply for a K1. There isn't a way to fill out the forms, only fill in the forms truthfully otherwise harsh consequences shall follow.

[wifetobe 2]

Thanks,

You are mentioning follow I-129f , If he follow, only think he have to mention is the name and date of prior marriages, and the letter how we met, they are just looking to see if we met in the past 2 years. Well there is a big event took place. infidelity, how that supposed to be submitted or is this out of their guideline.

Thank agan

What country is he from?

[Ling Ling 22]

Thanks,

You are mentioning follow I-129f , If he follow, only think he have to mention is the name and date of prior marriages, and the letter how we met, they are just looking to see if we met in the past 2 years. Well there is a big event took place. infidelity, how that supposed to be submitted or is this out of their guideline.

Thank agan

First you wrote, "A FRIEND is in this situation".

Then you wrote "how WE met"....HA busted.

While some Consulates frown on age gaps and previous marriages,

as others have said, they don't deny people because of infidelity. They do care that he's currently married.

He can't petition for an I-129f until he's divorced. They do care that he will need sufficient income to support you.

They also care that you have met in the last 2 years...I think your little bundle of joy (or their birth certificate) will be pretty damned good proof that you two have "met".

NOW...while things aren't going well for him at home, make sure he doesn't make things any worse while he's trying to get out of the marriage.

He needs to get out clean. If there's any domestic violence, or orders of protection, that could be cause for petition denial.

The USA doesn't want you coming here and getting into a dangerous situation. The USA doesn't want to help import victims.

You'll find that most VJers are very intelligent, open minded, people who understand the complexities of life and relationships.

We understand that ####### happens, and that beautiful unexpected things happen, like falling in love with someone in a distant country.

We just hope and pray that after all this hard work, ####### doesn't happen to any of us, and that we can live happily ever after.

Welcome to our community.

[wifetobe 2]

Thanks,

You are mentioning follow I-129f , If he follow, only think he have to mention is the name and date of prior marriages, and the letter how we met, they are just looking to see if we met in the past 2 years. Well there is a big event took place. infidelity, how that supposed to be submitted or is this out of their guideline.

Thank agan

First you wrote, "A FRIEND is in this situation".

Then you wrote "how WE met"....HA busted.

While some Consulates frown on age gaps and previous marriages,

as others have said, they don't deny people because of infidelity. They do care that he's currently married.

He can't petition for an I-129f until he's divorced. They do care that he will need sufficient income to support you.

They also care that you have met in the last 2 years...I think your little bundle of joy (or their birth certificate) will be pretty damned good proof that you two have "met".

NOW...while things aren't going well for him at home, make sure he doesn't make things any worse while he's trying to get out of the marriage.

He needs to get out clean. If there's any domestic violence, or orders of protection, that could be cause for petition denial.

The USA doesn't want you coming here and getting into a dangerous situation. The USA doesn't want to help import victims.

You'll find that most VJers are very intelligent, open minded, people who understand the complexities of life and relationships.

We understand that ####### happens, and that beautiful unexpected things happen, like falling in love with someone in a distant country.

We just hope and pray that after all this hard work, ####### doesn't happen to any of us, and that we can live happily ever after.

Welcome to our community.

Well said Ling Ling

[Scarlett 0]

My fiance was married when we first met. He got divorced and we filed our I-129F as soon as the divorce decree came through. So all of the evidence of our meetings was from the time when he was technically married. Our I-129F was approved with no questions.

I expect to talk about the previous marriage at my interview, but I don't expect them to make any moral judgements on our relationship. All that matters is that he was divorced by the time we filed the petition and we have a very genuine relationship and intention to be married.

To be honest I had never even thought about this. There may be more problems around divorce and "infidelity" (In my case he had left his wife by the time we got together, so I don't even consider it to be infidelity) in other countries but it the UK and US I presume not.

Edited September 5, 2008 by Scarlett

[HighwayStar 0]

My fiance was married when we first met. He got divorced and we filed our I-129F as soon as the divorce decree came through. So all of the evidence of our meetings was from the time when he was technically married. Our I-129F was approved with no questions.

I expect to talk about the previous marriage at my interview, but I don't expect them to make any moral judgements on our relationship. All that matters is that he was divorced by the time we filed the petition and we have a very genuine relationship and intention to be married.

To be honest I had never even thought about this. There may be more problems around divorce and "infidelity" (In my case he had left his wife by the time we got together, so I don't even consider it to be infidelity) in other countries but it the UK and US I presume not.

Same here. He had been legally separated for three months when we first met, so, as Scarlett said, he was still technically married. However, his divorce decree was final when we filed our K-1 petition, which was approved one month ago. There are quite a few other people who are in the same situation as ours too.

[pushbrk 12,908]

He can't do anything until his divorce is final. If he then does as you say and marries his foreign girlfriend, she isn't a fiancee anymore, so he would file for CR1 or K3, not a K1 fiancee visa.

For a fiancee visa, they must have seen each other in person during the past two years. For a spouse, the marriage makes that point moot. He can simply explain when and how they met without referring to "infidelity". They'll get the picture when they compare the date of divorce to the date the couple's child was born and it would not become an issue in the visa process. Getting a divorce and marrying a mistress is an old story.

The issue you haven't addressed is the child. Did he file a Consular Report of Birth Abroad so his illigitimate child would have US Citizenship? If not, this should be done now, if possible.

In which country does the foreign girlfried reside and have citizenship? It could make a difference in a number of ways.

Edited September 5, 2008 by pushbrk

[KimandRuss 0]

I knew Russell for more than 10 years before we filed. I was legally married until April of this year. I filed the very day my divorce decree came through. All they care about is that you are legally free to marry and have met in the last two years.

That being said, and as mentioned several times above, much depends on what Country you are going through. I think you're ok at the uscis but a very recent divorce is probably going to be scrutinized at a higher fraud Consulate, simply because it gives them fuel. I think most CO's (at normal Consulates anyway) are wise enough to understand that a marriage can be over well before it's 'legally' over and that often a couple does not file for a divorce until they 'have' to. In our case, it was just years of my ex not wanting to sign the papers....and me being too nice to screw him to the wall. Keep in mind that many states put you in a nisi period as well and you can't file for the I129f until you have that final decree hand.

Good luck.

[ladybee 0]

yes i agree with others , the consulate does not care about your past relationships or marriages. They care about now in the present make sure you have your divorce final with decree in your hand before filing any papers work with immigration. As long as it is a real relationship. Then your friend should not not be denied for past mariage.

[pushbrk 12,908]

yes i agree with others , the consulate does not care about your past relationships or marriages. They care about now in the present make sure you have your divorce final with decree in your hand before filing any papers work with immigration. As long as it is a real relationship. Then your friend should not not be denied for past mariage.

It's reasonably safe to conclude a Consular officer won't make a big issue of having had an affair and illigitimate child with the foreign beneficiary but you can bet your britches they care about previous relationships for many other reasons. I don't see a worry here but your assertion bolded above is far to broad to be accurate.

[ladybee 0]

yes i agree with others , the consulate does not care about your past relationships or marriages. They care about now in the present make sure you have your divorce final with decree in your hand before filing any papers work with immigration. As long as it is a real relationship. Then your friend should not not be denied for past mariage.

It's reasonably safe to conclude a Consular officer won't make a big issue of having had an affair and illigitimate child with the foreign beneficiary but you can bet your britches they care about previous relationships for many other reasons. I don't see a worry here but your assertion bolded above is far to broad to be accurate.

yes i can understand what you are saying if there have been abuse or fraud in past relationships. thank you

[pushbrk 12,908]

yes i agree with others , the consulate does not care about your past relationships or marriages. They care about now in the present make sure you have your divorce final with decree in your hand before filing any papers work with immigration. As long as it is a real relationship. Then your friend should not not be denied for past mariage.

It's reasonably safe to conclude a Consular officer won't make a big issue of having had an affair and illigitimate child with the foreign beneficiary but you can bet your britches they care about previous relationships for many other reasons. I don't see a worry here but your assertion bolded above is far to broad to be accurate.

yes i can understand what you are saying if there have been abuse or fraud in past relationships. thank you

Actually, the more common reason for concern is that the past relationship is currently ongoing and the petitioned relationship is a fraud. Past relationships, including what the parties know about their partner's past relationships often impact the evaluation of the bona fides of currently petitioned relationships.