Athlete without Compelling Personal Drama Expelled from Olympics

[almaty 19]

August 11, 2008

Athlete without Compelling Personal Drama Expelled from Olympics

A member of the U.S. Olympic diving team was disqualified from competition today when it was learned that he did not have a sufficiently compelling human storyline to exploit on the NBC telecast of the worldwide sporting event.

Tracy Klujian, the expelled diver, was not raised by a single mother, never had a career-threatening injury, and did not overcome a personal tragedy of any kind before making the Olympic diving team, U.S. Olympic officials revealed today.

"Had Tracy been involved in an organ donation, as either a donor or a recipient, that would have been acceptable to us," a diving team spokesman told reporters. "However, he was not."

According to sources close to the diving team, Mr. Klujian had concealed the fact that he comes from an intact middle class family who never lost their home to a flood, tornado, or typhoon.

But what may have sealed Mr.Klujian's doom, sources said, was his utter lack of a gravely ill family member to win a medal for.

"Tracy did his best to hide his background from team officials," one source said. "But when the truth came out, he was finished."

Speaking to reporters in Beijing, NBC Sports chief ####### Ebersol was even less charitable, terming Mr. Klujian's actions "a reprehensible betrayal."

"We do our best to check out all of the athletes to make sure that their backgrounds are full of compelling human drama, but we can't catch everything," Mr. Ebersol said. "This is a case of one really bad guy exploiting the system."

terrible, the guy's father could have at least got arrested for robbing the Quik Mart..to help his son out..

yeah, i am sick of all the drama and life stories in every USA athletic life...

[Ban Hammer 13,644]

onion?

[Marilyn. 340]

it is written by Andy Borowitz a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/andy-borowit...n_b_118281.html

[almaty 19]

it is written by Andy Borowitz a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/andy-borowit...n_b_118281.html

wow, i am impressed sister marilyn..and you are spot on

[Otto 83]

NBC = Nothing But #######...

The story is of course tongue in cheek but seems so close to the truth - enough with the drama...

[Imua 0]

onion?

I thought the same thing just looking at the title.

[Cdn_Ali 11]

Shameful...just shameful. How dare he not have some sort of past baggage for us to dissect !!!

[HAL 9000 96]

NBC = Not Bob Costas!

[Sinergy 3]

ok im confused...is this true or not?

[almaty 19]

no sister tara..it is making fun of nbc coverage..and always having drama for each athletic past

[Sassy1natl 0]

ok im confused...is this true or not?

Don't feel bad... I was wondering too.

[Marilyn. 340]

it is written by Andy Borowitz a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/andy-borowit...n_b_118281.html

ok im confused...is this true or not?