POLL - Would you move out of the US?

[Dr. Obvious 49]

Wow! Thanks for the info. I was really expecting answers like language, culture, etc. I am well into a pretty successful career, and could not move to Ukraine without seriously changing my lifestyle, but the language is the #1 thing. I work on my Russian in fits and starts, and have registered for a night class this fall, but I just don't have time to develop a true fluency. It would be nice to talk to Vika's parents. It was intersting to read about the culturally specific issues that your inlaws had too. It makes me wonder...

Yeah, I was a little confused on the whole point. My in-laws also speak no English for all intents and purposes. My FIL thinks it is funny to randomly spit out English words or phrases, but a real conversation with him in English I have never had. My MIL I don't think has ever uttered a single word of English to me even as a joke. So all of my communication with them has been in German. It is OK. I still talk to them on ICQ about once every two weeks or so, usually for an hour or more at a time. Over time the communication and the relationship has gotten a lot better and I like them mostly. I think there would really be something missing if I had no relationship with them. Since the initial weird support issue, they haven't been a problem and pretty good to me. They do basically treat me like their own daughter. Besides the occasional minor annoyances, I can't complain.

Learning a language is a lot of work, but very rewarding. Your wife can help and there is access to through the internet Russian programming and radio. There are some simple ways to work in Russian into your everyday life. One would be just to have Russian radio on as background noise or perhaps buy a children's picture book with the words in Russian in them to help with the alphabet and vocabulary. It sounds silly, but I did watch a a bit of children's programming in the beginning. It was just far easier to understand and helped build confidence that I was making good progress even if I couldn't debate about the merits of post-modern art yet. I guess you have to learn to walk before you learn to run.

In your case if you have a good job here and little or no hope of that in the Ukraine, it is an understandable decision not to give that up. I moved to Germany because I had no real ties to the US. I had fufilled all the requirements for graduation from college before I left. I had a paid internship in Germany (albeit 4 hours from where my husband lived...). I had no children. I had no fantastic job here. I spoke some German. Why stay when I could experience life abroad for awhile? Even it all failed, I could hardly see regretting the whole experience. But that was just my specific case. Also there were other factors like my husband was still studying and uni was basically free there (changed since we left though, but still nowhere near as expensive as a US university). Mostly, I was satisfied with the whole experiment. I would go back if that would be how the cards would fall.

I guess the only other glaringly strange cultural differences I encountered over there was that everyone over 45 seemed obessed with my infant at the time being cold. Forget that it was around 80-90F outside on those days and that she was stuck on me with a BabyBjoern. A random azzhat at Kaufland one day grabbed my daughter's foot to make sure it wasn't cold while I was distacted looking at something else. Then called to his wife that 'Oh, the feet ARE warm!'. #######???? It seemed to be some weird generational-cultural thing because no one who looked under that age ever make any remarks.

Have you ever spent any significant amount of time in Ukraine?

[Brad and Vika 129]

Wow! Thanks for the info. I was really expecting answers like language, culture, etc. I am well into a pretty successful career, and could not move to Ukraine without seriously changing my lifestyle, but the language is the #1 thing. I work on my Russian in fits and starts, and have registered for a night class this fall, but I just don't have time to develop a true fluency. It would be nice to talk to Vika's parents. It was intersting to read about the culturally specific issues that your inlaws had too. It makes me wonder...

Yeah, I was a little confused on the whole point. My in-laws also speak no English for all intents and purposes. My FIL thinks it is funny to randomly spit out English words or phrases, but a real conversation with him in English I have never had. My MIL I don't think has ever uttered a single word of English to me even as a joke. So all of my communication with them has been in German. It is OK. I still talk to them on ICQ about once every two weeks or so, usually for an hour or more at a time. Over time the communication and the relationship has gotten a lot better and I like them mostly. I think there would really be something missing if I had no relationship with them. Since the initial weird support issue, they haven't been a problem and pretty good to me. They do basically treat me like their own daughter. Besides the occasional minor annoyances, I can't complain.

Learning a language is a lot of work, but very rewarding. Your wife can help and there is access to through the internet Russian programming and radio. There are some simple ways to work in Russian into your everyday life. One would be just to have Russian radio on as background noise or perhaps buy a children's picture book with the words in Russian in them to help with the alphabet and vocabulary. It sounds silly, but I did watch a a bit of children's programming in the beginning. It was just far easier to understand and helped build confidence that I was making good progress even if I couldn't debate about the merits of post-modern art yet. I guess you have to learn to walk before you learn to run.

In your case if you have a good job here and little or no hope of that in the Ukraine, it is an understandable decision not to give that up. I moved to Germany because I had no real ties to the US. I had fufilled all the requirements for graduation from college before I left. I had a paid internship in Germany (albeit 4 hours from where my husband lived...). I had no children. I had no fantastic job here. I spoke some German. Why stay when I could experience life abroad for awhile? Even it all failed, I could hardly see regretting the whole experience. But that was just my specific case. Also there were other factors like my husband was still studying and uni was basically free there (changed since we left though, but still nowhere near as expensive as a US university). Mostly, I was satisfied with the whole experiment. I would go back if that would be how the cards would fall.

I guess the only other glaringly strange cultural differences I encountered over there was that everyone over 45 seemed obessed with my infant at the time being cold. Forget that it was around 80-90F outside on those days and that she was stuck on me with a BabyBjoern. A random azzhat at Kaufland one day grabbed my daughter's foot to make sure it wasn't cold while I was distacted looking at something else. Then called to his wife that 'Oh, the feet ARE warm!'. #######???? It seemed to be some weird generational-cultural thing because no one who looked under that age ever make any remarks.

Have you ever spent any significant amount of time in Ukraine?

Not significant, no. I have been twice, for two weeks each time. Since we originally met here, it wasn't much of an issue as far as getting to know each other. I have been around Eastern Europe for years though - for business and vacations. I tried to start a business in Belarus, and spent some time in Romania and Bulgaria with a foundation, and several short visits to Czech, Poland, Latvia, Lithuania, and others. The sense of hospitality and welcome was really different than what I see in America, and I enjoyed the european tendency to judge me on my personality and character rather than my position and toys. As I voted in the poll, I would love to split my time between my home country and Viktoria's, but I really believe I need a better command of the language to really get the full sense of the culture.

By the way, people in Eastern Europe have the same issues with babies and cold. Kids are wrapped up like mummies, and leaving any body part exposed will draw advice from total strangers about drafts, illness, etc. I tend to find it funny, but I have only been an observer.

[Moto-zutto 0]

I was in my Fiance's country for 3 years... I love it and I did not want to leave, but the Military gave me orders to the U.S. So if I was not under contract, I would so get a visa and move to her country.

[Brad and Vika 129]

I was in my Fiance's country for 3 years... I love it and I did not want to leave, but the Military gave me orders to the U.S. So if I was not under contract, I would so get a visa and move to her country.

How do you think you would integrate?

[JVKn'CVO 11]

Voted on behalf on jvk, he said Yes

We have talked about spending a few years in the future, or maybe retirement. We would like our kids to travel there often and get to know this part of their heritage

[Brad and Vika 129]

Voted on behalf on jvk, he said Yes

We have talked about spending a few years in the future, or maybe retirement. We would like our kids to travel there often and get to know this part of their heritage

Nice - lots of us could benefit from that sort of context to our lives.

[Welshcookie 17]

I know my hubby would be happy to stay here in the UK...but financially it just isn't worth it...our standard of living would be greater in the US.

[sereia 0]

yes sir!

[Brad and Vika 129]

yes sir!

[imakhan2 0]

Live and die in Pakistan?? No Way!

[archie07 0]

No way, my head looks better attached to my neck!

[Brad and Vika 129]

No way, my head looks better attached to my neck!

I didn't know that was a common ailment in the PI!

[jundp 191]

I would move to Germany if I had the TOEFL requirements so I could teach there. Not hard to get and certainly we'd have time to plan for it. As Wacken mentioned, we'd need to apply to keep P's German citizenship before we could apply for him to have USC and I doubt we'd move to Germany without that.

My oldest son is already fluent in German and my daughter wants to learn. If P and I have any babies, we'd want ALL our kids to experience both countries. But I insist on being at least conversational before a move, since I am a language teacher and it's unacceptable, to me, to move to another country without having the basics of the language. In the part of Germany where P is from most people do speak English, and his entire family speaks English (except his Oma), but that just makes me lazy! I need to learn to honor my husband's heritage too.

We'll see what the future holds. For now it will have to be saving up and visiting for long vacations. I love his family and I don't think we'd be able to handle more than a couple of years without a visit (and even that is pushing it, but once a year may prove to be too costly).

[KarenCee 3]

I would move to Germany if I had the TOEFL requirements so I could teach there. Not hard to get and certainly we'd have time to plan for it. As Wacken mentioned, we'd need to apply to keep P's German citizenship before we could apply for him to have USC and I doubt we'd move to Germany without that.

My oldest son is already fluent in German and my daughter wants to learn. If P and I have any babies, we'd want ALL our kids to experience both countries. But I insist on being at least conversational before a move, since I am a language teacher and it's unacceptable, to me, to move to another country without having the basics of the language. In the part of Germany where P is from most people do speak English, and his entire family speaks English (except his Oma), but that just makes me lazy! I need to learn to honor my husband's heritage too.

We'll see what the future holds. For now it will have to be saving up and visiting for long vacations. I love his family and I don't think we'd be able to handle more than a couple of years without a visit (and even that is pushing it, but once a year may prove to be too costly).

This is how I feel too. My husband's heritage (French Acadian) is very important to him and to me. I want to learn to speak his language as well so that when we do move there in the future I will be able to converse with anyone - as well as be able to teach in the schools there. Most of his family speak English too...there are lots in the village who do not, or if they do it's very hard to understand them. J is taking his time to teach me and our daughter...so far so good. I guess I have the ability to learn after all!

Edited September 10, 2008 by KarenCee

[symbiosis 0]

Lived there for 3 years. Loved it. I'm back in the states is for family reasons.