Does your muslim husband mind if you drink?

[Nagishkaw 510]

[morocco4ever 63]

Pass the popcorn, I have the bebsi.

[doodlebugg 10]

[JULIAFERNO 0]

My fiance is Muslim by heritage, but not a practicing Muslim, so he doesn't mind - he drinks too (although not much and not often). He understands the cultural difference and I don't think he would mind if I got drunk, as long as I was at home with him! Otherwise he doesn't like it if I have more than 1 or 2 when I am out with friends. I think he'd rather I didn't go out and drink at all, but he's tolerant

[Donna A 4]

i dont drink so im not sure how my husband would react.

[tanyakaraman 0]

But I would assume the majority of the muslim men as the majority of christian men do not accept drinking alcohol. and that in that given situation the men would not want their wife to drink either.

Do you really think that's true? I haven't gotten that impression at all.

Nor have I. It's frowned upon in some denominations or individual congregations but accepted (in moderation) in others. I've been in Protestant communion services where wine was served, with grape juice as an alternative.

From my point of view, I was raised Baptist and drinking was strictly forbidden. To this day, I do not drink in front of my Christian mother, out of respect, because she would be horrified. When taking communion in church, we were always served grape juice (our preacher even went so far as to suggest that whenever "wine" was mentioned in the Bible, the term was really referring to grape juice).

On the other hand, my Muslim husband and I have drinks together a couple times a week...usually at his suggestion! Then again, drinking alcohol is somewhat of a cultural norm for Turks (Turkish raki). I think that makes a big difference.

[rclouse 0]

After my wife (fiancee then) got here she went through a little "wild" phase with the alcohol. You know, forbidden fruit and all. But after she discovered she was pregnant with our son she hasn't indulged since, though I think in social situations she will after our daughter is born. As for me, she tolerates my wine-with-dinner Saturday night, and on special occasions I'll go have some beer at a fantastic beer bar nearby. During Ramadan she wants us to be more observant so I'll jump on the wagon then.

I question the whole "zero-tolerance" understanding of Islam anyway. There are only two places in the Koran that mention it, I think prohibition is more a cultural thing. I'd love to talk to a sheikh about these kinds of things but we're not terribly observant (suits me fine; observance leads to fundyism) so I've not had the opportunity.

[mahboula 11]

I have a feeling that most muslim husbands will mind you drinking. Anyone? I am curious as well!

I thought it would be the same way too, but, so far, from the responses it seems most don't mind or might even drink a little themselves. Mine did drink in his 20's but it's been years since then. I'd like to have the occasional guilt-free glass of wine, so maybe he and I can agree to do that together once a year on our anniversary like someone else here posted.

Mahboula, were you drinking with a woman or a man?

Ah....well there's a part of it I didn't get into. I was drinking with two male neighbors, one of which was my ex-boss, and the other a single dad who I babysit for occasionally. Yes, it was an issue that they were men, but they are my only friends in Florida and have NEVER been inappropriate with me. They know I'm married etc...well that's a totally separate issue anyway. I wanted to keep it simple, and just see how the Muslim men felt about their wives drinking period.

[sandinista! 1,816]

After my wife (fiancee then) got here she went through a little "wild" phase with the alcohol. You know, forbidden fruit and all. But after she discovered she was pregnant with our son she hasn't indulged since, though I think in social situations she will after our daughter is born. As for me, she tolerates my wine-with-dinner Saturday night, and on special occasions I'll go have some beer at a fantastic beer bar nearby. During Ramadan she wants us to be more observant so I'll jump on the wagon then.

I question the whole "zero-tolerance" understanding of Islam anyway. There are only two places in the Koran that mention it, I think prohibition is more a cultural thing. I'd love to talk to a sheikh about these kinds of things but we're not terribly observant (suits me fine; observance leads to fundyism) so I've not had the opportunity.

plenty of people are observant without being mindless, fundie drones. saying that, you sound like just as big of an ####### as i'd sound if i wrote that not being terribly observant leads to degeneracy and bad character.

[caybee 21]

I have a feeling that most muslim husbands will mind you drinking. Anyone? I am curious as well!

I thought it would be the same way too, but, so far, from the responses it seems most don't mind or might even drink a little themselves. Mine did drink in his 20's but it's been years since then. I'd like to have the occasional guilt-free glass of wine, so maybe he and I can agree to do that together once a year on our anniversary like someone else here posted.

Mahboula, were you drinking with a woman or a man?

Ah....well there's a part of it I didn't get into. I was drinking with two male neighbors, one of which was my ex-boss, and the other a single dad who I babysit for occasionally. Yes, it was an issue that they were men, but they are my only friends in Florida and have NEVER been inappropriate with me. They know I'm married etc...well that's a totally separate issue anyway. I wanted to keep it simple, and just see how the Muslim men felt about their wives drinking period.

It's an enlightening discussion for sure, and I'm glad you brought it up. This additional factor -- no offense, I do understand the friendship thing -- but huh-uh, noooo, that would not fly, especially before he arrived. Even knowing we were just friends, that would cause a scandal in my husband's tradition, and he could only look at it through the eyes of his culture before he came here. It was different when I went out with my sister and her male friend-almost-brother that he'd heard about for months, but alone with two male non-relatives would have outweighed the whole alcohol issue for us.

[SaadBell 0]

Don't drink, not for any religious practice, just was married to a raging alcoholic for 23 years so one of us had to be the sober one and I got the job. Husband doesn’t drink and personally for me that is a good thing, I got tired of cleaning up after a drunk. Not that all people who drink are raging alcoholic’s, just that I have had my fill with booze. But I don’t mind if other’s drink, I am the last person to judge, but really smoking a joint is so much better to me than a drink.

[morocco4ever 63]

[morocco4ever 63]

Don't drink, not for any religious practice, just was married to a raging alcoholic for 23 years so one of us had to be the sober one and I got the job. Husband doesn’t drink and personally for me that is a good thing, I got tired of cleaning up after a drunk. Not that all people who drink are raging alcoholic’s, just that I have had my fill with booze. But I don’t mind if other’s drink, I am the last person to judge, but really smoking a joint is so much better to me than a drink.

(jk)

[Staashi 371]

I have a feeling that most muslim husbands will mind you drinking. Anyone? I am curious as well!

I thought it would be the same way too, but, so far, from the responses it seems most don't mind or might even drink a little themselves. Mine did drink in his 20's but it's been years since then. I'd like to have the occasional guilt-free glass of wine, so maybe he and I can agree to do that together once a year on our anniversary like someone else here posted.

Mahboula, were you drinking with a woman or a man?

Ah....well there's a part of it I didn't get into. I was drinking with two male neighbors, one of which was my ex-boss, and the other a single dad who I babysit for occasionally. Yes, it was an issue that they were men, but they are my only friends in Florida and have NEVER been inappropriate with me. They know I'm married etc...well that's a totally separate issue anyway. I wanted to keep it simple, and just see how the Muslim men felt about their wives drinking period.

See, I had to ask, as this to me was so much more than a girl getting tipsy with the girlfriends. And now that you've written that there were two men, reminds me of the way a story might start out in one of those trashy Penthouse Forum stories..."Well, it was a steamy Florida night and I was home alone, when a couple of my neighbors asked me if I wanted to come over and have a few beers with them. My husband was out of town, and I was feeling lonely, so I said, 'Sure, what the hell - that sounds great!' The next thing I knew I was..."

I'm not trying to make fun of your loneliness - it does suck, but drinking with two men might not look too good...even if they're friends.

[mahboula 11]

Don't drink, not for any religious practice, just was married to a raging alcoholic for 23 years so one of us had to be the sober one and I got the job. Husband doesn’t drink and personally for me that is a good thing, I got tired of cleaning up after a drunk. Not that all people who drink are raging alcoholic’s, just that I have had my fill with booze. But I don’t mind if other’s drink, I am the last person to judge, but really smoking a joint is so much better to me than a drink.

(jk)