Did your MENA man want to move

[brnidokiegurl 0]

I would imagine movies, tv and friends are doing this....part of the dream...Ahmed ask once if people move from okla because of the tornadoes, told him no where would u go they can be anywhere? NYC is the one place most know of and they think it must be fantastic and calif that is another place i think most would like to try.

[amal 4]

Nawal - It's really hard to live in the city with kids. (but it's has some good things too) We moved from semi-rural WI to Washington DC a little over a year ago. When my husband came we were in WI and his brother was living in NYC with his wife. We went to visit New York and liked it and we also started looking for jobs in other locations in bigger cities (we weren't set on the East Coast but somewhere bigger). I got a job in DC and so we moved out here - whew it was a shock on the pocket book and definetely has tradeoffs. Of course my husband didn't like WI he wanted the big city and the big money. But now that we live in the "big" city there isn't so much "big" money becasue the cost of living is so different. We were paying about $1800 (with utilities etc) for a 2 bedroom apartment outside DC. In WI we paid $600 a month for a 3 bedroom HOUSE. Yes we both make more money but it takes a lot more to get by. It's harder for me to trust people here especially with the kids and even daycare/preschools are astronomical (if you can even get in) in comparison to what there was in WI. I do love that there is so much diversity. My kids are getting used to and see it as normal to have diversity all around them (people, food, activities etc). There are lots of opportunities for jobs, school, and free time but it also comes down to the money issue. I think if your SO has marketable skills and would be able to get at least a mid-level position then it will work fine. If they are going to be working in basic jobs - $10-12 an hr is about what they'll get and that goes nowhere here. (My husband makes $12 and if it weren't for my job he couldn't even pay for our rent).

Now that we've been here awhile he'll ask occassionally "Do you miss WI?" and I'll say yes because of course that's where my family is and I grew up. He talks about missing it too and the community we had there, how much more friendly the people were and being able to get away from people and the city easily. I don't think we'll move back there anytime soon (although who knows). I think that no matter where we are there will always be a longing for another place, I realized awhile ago that neither one of us will ever be home. If we live here, his home in his mind is in Morocco and vice versa. So at least this way we have depended on each other and both been as homesick!!

That's about the same thing as us. Mine heard from friends that Houston had so many "better" opportunities and even though I fought for over a year, we ended up moving. We still don't have any money and I still hate it down here. The only good things are the girls I've met and I like my job. Other than that...I pretty much hate everything about Texas (no offense to the Texanites).

Before mine came here he told me that his ideal lifestyle would be calm, relaxed, living in a simple home, with simple traffic, and simple jobs, easy nights doing absolutely nothing. That's EXACTLY what I had when he got here but it didn't "suit" him.

He will sometimes mention that Missouri was so much easier and so much better but he still doesn't want to go back yet coz he can "make the big bucks" here in TX....where are those big bucks??? He also commented once that if he would have become a manager at Wal-Mart, he wouldn't have made much money..only 60 to 65k/year!!!! I told him... 65k is a LOT of money in Missouri... I couldn't believe that to someone who came from a country where 100 dollars a month was a big deal, that 65,000/monthly was "not enough money" to be worth it to stay in Missouri...

So I guess to answer ur question, yeah Mine wanted to move .. and we did.

[nunyab 0]

wow... more than I expected!!!! I am not sure what he is wanting he is saying "more comfortable" my family is in Oregon and he wants me near my family so it would be nice....but .... well gotta worry about other things before. Just not sure what "more comfortable" means lol...

[Carolyn 1]

Like many of you, my husband occasionally has dreams of moving to somewhere else...NYC at first, then he realized how much more expensive it is, and decided it is a great place to visit. I think we both would LOVE NYC (maybe Queens or Brooklyn?), but only if we had more money! One of his good buddies from Morocco works two full-time jobs to support his family and still doesn't live all that well (small apartment + big debt).

After a few years in the US, Simo is fine with Minneapolis in the summer, but (understandably) hates the winters. I agree, but we own a house and all my family is here, so it is difficult to make a big change. Especially with a baby on the way.

I think I would agree to a change if HE took charge--went and visited the place and got himself a good job offer first. I think it would be good for his self-esteem--here he is still so reliant on me financially and otherwise. I would like to see him become more in charge--I'm a little tired of that role!

[Nothing1234 2]

Nawal - It's really hard to live in the city with kids. (but it's has some good things too) We moved from semi-rural WI to Washington DC a little over a year ago. When my husband came we were in WI and his brother was living in NYC with his wife. We went to visit New York and liked it and we also started looking for jobs in other locations in bigger cities (we weren't set on the East Coast but somewhere bigger). I got a job in DC and so we moved out here - whew it was a shock on the pocket book and definetely has tradeoffs. Of course my husband didn't like WI he wanted the big city and the big money. But now that we live in the "big" city there isn't so much "big" money becasue the cost of living is so different. We were paying about $1800 (with utilities etc) for a 2 bedroom apartment outside DC. In WI we paid $600 a month for a 3 bedroom HOUSE. Yes we both make more money but it takes a lot more to get by. It's harder for me to trust people here especially with the kids and even daycare/preschools are astronomical (if you can even get in) in comparison to what there was in WI. I do love that there is so much diversity. My kids are getting used to and see it as normal to have diversity all around them (people, food, activities etc). There are lots of opportunities for jobs, school, and free time but it also comes down to the money issue. I think if your SO has marketable skills and would be able to get at least a mid-level position then it will work fine. If they are going to be working in basic jobs - $10-12 an hr is about what they'll get and that goes nowhere here. (My husband makes $12 and if it weren't for my job he couldn't even pay for our rent).

Now that we've been here awhile he'll ask occassionally "Do you miss WI?" and I'll say yes because of course that's where my family is and I grew up. He talks about missing it too and the community we had there, how much more friendly the people were and being able to get away from people and the city easily. I don't think we'll move back there anytime soon (although who knows). I think that no matter where we are there will always be a longing for another place, I realized awhile ago that neither one of us will ever be home. If we live here, his home in his mind is in Morocco and vice versa. So at least this way we have depended on each other and both been as homesick!!

I agree! If someone is making lower wages its next to impossible to survive in NYC or any other city for that matter. It is also hard living in the city w/ kids but I was raised in NYC...the village. I loved it and I guess because I'm used to the lifestyle its easier for me. I miss Jane Street I think I just want my children to have the diversity that I had....I feel I have run into to many ignorant/uneducated (or closed minded) folks around the country and I thank god for being raised in the city.

As for where I'd live...I'm open to NJ as well. At least I'd be close enough for trips into the city. I miss going to the see jazz shows, plays and many other things (food included!!). We were so involved in the city life (my family and I).... Cost is definately an issue but funny thing our last visit (last month) I found food cheaper in NY/NJ than in AZ and gas too! So crazy. I realize that people prefer country life to city life So thats what makes America so great!! There is a place for everyone. I just defend NY often because I'm a born and raised NY'er I get defensive when people insult the city and have never lived a minute in it. Most of the people they claim or rude or mean are in my experience transplants from other states...true NY'ers in my experience have hearts of gold and will help a "lost" visitor out. (getting off my soap box now)....LOL

[nunyab 0]

I think he'll like it here when he gets here insha'allah.. we've got so many different types of environents... a drive to the ocean, a drive to the mountains, dessert, city and country.... what more can you ask for???

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

I just want to live somewhere where I have at least five acres of land around my house and a big electric fence. I want TiVo, and a home theater system, internet access, a cell phone, an great big art studio to do whatever I wanted, maybe two horses outback I feed and water and brush in the mornings, a flower garden with all kinds of roses, and a vegtable garden I take care of everyday, and some dogs and cats. I'd like lots of trees for shade and maybe a pond somewhere, and lots of wild natural green around, and peace and quiet where I don't ever have to see anyone, besides my Husband, if I don't want to.

[Carolyn 1]

Olivia, your vision for your future home is beautiful, but so, so, so unlike anything I would ever want! Thank goodness we don't all like the same things, eh?

I like to be able to get to a little peace and quiet on occasion, but would prefer a good number of people around. My husband loves to be in the middle of the action--he grew up in the Medina in Marrakech, Morocco surrounded by people...his first observation of Minneapolis: WHERE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE?

[S and S 12]

I just want to live somewhere where I have at least five acres of land around my house and a big electric fence. I want TiVo, and a home theater system, internet access, a cell phone, an great big art studio to do whatever I wanted, maybe two horses outback I feed and water and brush in the mornings, a flower garden with all kinds of roses, and a vegtable garden I take care of everyday, and some dogs and cats. I'd like lots of trees for shade and maybe a pond somewhere, and lots of wild natural green around, and peace and quiet where I don't ever have to see anyone, besides my Husband, if I don't want to.

I love your version! Unfortunately, my husband would never go for it, lol. I'm hoping for a compromise like the suburbs.

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

Sofyan always talks about getting out of chicago...Life is expensive here...and he hates that all the towns surrounding us are filled with arabs...He says he has no privacy and it feels like he is living in jordan again..everything we do, somehow makes it to his family in jordan...He talks about Ohio alot...

[Hanna&Mohamed 0]

Mohamed was talking about he wanted to move to California This was before they had that earthquake .I told him no because they have earthquakes there and the next week they did have one. So I'm not sure where we will move to.He doesnt like Virginia very much ! I told him I would like to move in Northern Virginia or Maryland so we will see!I told him there its very busy life!!

Edited August 4, 2008 by mohamedandmelinda

[mahboula 11]

I just want to live somewhere where I have at least five acres of land around my house and a big electric fence. I want TiVo, and a home theater system, internet access, a cell phone, an great big art studio to do whatever I wanted, maybe two horses outback I feed and water and brush in the mornings, a flower garden with all kinds of roses, and a vegtable garden I take care of everyday, and some dogs and cats. I'd like lots of trees for shade and maybe a pond somewhere, and lots of wild natural green around, and peace and quiet where I don't ever have to see anyone, besides my Husband, if I don't want to.

Awesome! Can we come live with you?

[nunyab 0]

I just want to live somewhere where I have at least five acres of land around my house and a big electric fence. I want TiVo, and a home theater system, internet access, a cell phone, an great big art studio to do whatever I wanted, maybe two horses outback I feed and water and brush in the mornings, a flower garden with all kinds of roses, and a vegtable garden I take care of everyday, and some dogs and cats. I'd like lots of trees for shade and maybe a pond somewhere, and lots of wild natural green around, and peace and quiet where I don't ever have to see anyone, besides my Husband, if I don't want to.

Awesome! Can we come live with you?

me too not sure my husband will go for it lol..

[merijan 0]

I think he'll like it here when he gets here insha'allah.. we've got so many different types of environents... a drive to the ocean, a drive to the mountains, dessert, city and country.... what more can you ask for???

I wish we could move there. Seattle area is so beautifull. Love it. He will love it after he gets there. But I was wondering are there alot of different cultures there? like Arabs, Pakis, Indian, etc?? and what is the Muslim communities like?

[Aymsgirl 0]

Well here in good old O H I O, we have very unpredictable weather. I am awaiting the winter dread with my husband. He has never seen snow or felt cold like we get. He often says can't we move to Florida or California, anywhere warmer throughout the year? I unfortunately am previously divorced and can not leave the state unless our jobs transfer.

We live in a town that is actually so small it is called a village. Nothing goes on here and you have to drive to just about anywhere you want to go. My husband often refers to it as the beautiful prison. It's pretty, the doors are open and you can leave any time but there is just no where to go or nothing to do! I guess I'm just used to it but eventually I hope he will adjust.