Its Caturday MENA!

[Alhamdulillah 0]

If a man has an extra-marital affair with a woman for 20 years it's OK in the US.... no laws preventing it and even if there are some still on the books they'll never be enforced but IF a man takes responsibilty for the woman he wants to have a relationship with, other than his first wife, and marries her then he's looking at serious prison time. Why is it better in this corrupted society to make whores of women than wives???

It may be legal but it is not culturally acceptable. As to why polygamy is not allowed-- well one, it's culturally unacceptable to the point where it is not up for change at this point, and two it would likely involve a change to our legal codes ebcause we have difficulty at this point with that the way things are set up. Our default inheritence, benefits (who is covered under the husband's insurance? All of the wives and kids? insurance would not want that to happen), what if the first wife was the basis for insurance? etc are a one-spouse situation. i think that's why gay marriage is making more headway than polygamy, even though it's obvious polygamy is an older tradition. You'd probably have to restructure our society to re-position the male as central and dominant figure and then either make all the incomes of the wives independant and the one male to be the only commonality, or just remove the wives from wealth and make the male one commonality. I am sure there are other ways to do it, but for simple ease of legality that seems like the way to go. You couldn't really make peopleco-equal in the situation because then you would end up with situations where a wife had to pay allimony to a divorced wife, etc if that should happen... so it would involve basically, something like teh implementation of Sharia which is a closed system for this amongst other things-- which Muslims would find OK, but the majority of people here would object to having.

I disagree that it's not culturally accepted.

If it were only a matter of how to adjust our laws then they wouldn't prosecute violators so harshly. A man can live with two women and not marry either one of them... or marry one and not the other but still live with both and it's perfectly OK here, legally. That's disgusting.

[Ban Hammer 13,345]

personally, i fail to see see polygamy/polyandry lacks the support gay marriage enjoys in this country.

I think ebcause it would involve a total change to our legal system. gay marriage, although far less traditional, is still a one-spouse system. That's all I can figure, honestly.

it don't even get support from the gay rights crowd here on vj. not even if say two of the 3 are bi-sexual.

[Nasturtium 500]

I disagree that it's not culturally accepted.

If it were only a matter of how to adjust our laws then they wouldn't prosecute violators so harshly. A man can live with two women and not marry either one of them... or marry one and not the other but still live with both and it's perfectly OK here, legally. That's disgusting.

If it were culturally acceptable, then there would not be a negative stigma associated with it. How many people get divorced over affairs? it is a named legal reason to do so. WHat I hear you saying over and over is that we are ALL OK with this idea of affairs and that any American can have an affair on any other American and we all accept this as fine and good. Right? Then why is it called cheating? Why do marriages break up over it? Why isn't everyone down at the swinger's club? If that is your perception of American marriage, I wonder where you grew up! I'm from "sin city" and even the most amoral people realized it wasn't the majority culture no matter that they thought it should be.

Also, changing the entirety of the legal code is not an easy thing to do. you would have to change the very social nature of the country. The above is only accepted as deviant and marginal IF all parties are in agreement. You have people who do this, even Muslims, in the US.

[Nothing1234 2]

S and S...where are you? I told you it was early before and only a matter of time...LOL

BTW---behaviors that happen here in the US happen just as frequently in other countries...just society in these countries choose to ignore it.

[S and S 12]

S and S...where are you? I told you it was early before and only a matter of time...LOL

BTW---behaviors that happen here in the US happen just as frequently in other countries...just society in these countries choose to ignore it.

Oh, I'm here, I just decided to sit this one out. I think I'll just watch this on for now.

You were right though! lol

Edited July 27, 2008 by S and S

[Nasturtium 500]

it don't even get support from the gay rights crowd here on vj. not even if say two of the 3 are bi-sexual.

Gay rights aren't arguing for multiple partners though, just single marriage. Multiple partners is another form of deviance of the norm. I would think that GR would begin to open the door for alternative marriages though... in that you can say now that the legal precident would no longer define marriage as between one man and one woman... but it would probably be rewritten to be between TWO consenting adults (thus shutting the door on polygamy.) I am surprised, though, that one cannot make a social contract that is not called a marriage legally, between multiple partners-- you do it in a will all the time. I think the issue becomes more when you deal with things like "next of kin" and all of that which is one person and then trying to regulate multiple partners. I don't know? I'm not caring about either one getting passed so I'm not out to argue why it could be done those are just the problems I see with it. it's like I don't condone marriages of underage people or animals either, and I see one of the basic impediments being they cannot enter into a contract legally because of their mental development as a logical issue. I still am not concerned with trying to legalize it so I'm not interested in figuring out the whole hows and whys. I do find it socially interesting that it is so reviled in our culture.

BTW---behaviors that happen here in the US happen just as frequently in other countries...just society in these countries choose to ignore it.

Or hide it better

[Nasturtium 500]

Oh, I'm here, I just decided to sit this one out. I think I'll just watch this on for now.

You were right though! lol

You going to be up late tonight again?

[S and S 12]

it don't even get support from the gay rights crowd here on vj. not even if say two of the 3 are bi-sexual.

Gay rights aren't arguing for multiple partners though, just single marriage. Multiple partners is another form of deviance of the norm. I would think that GR would begin to open the door for alternative marriages though... in that you can say now that the legal precident would no longer define marriage as between one man and one woman... but it would probably be rewritten to be between TWO consenting adults (thus shutting the door on polygamy.) I am surprised, though, that one cannot make a social contract that is not called a marriage legally, between multiple partners-- you do it in a will all the time. I think the issue becomes more when you deal with things like "next of kin" and all of that which is one person and then trying to regulate multiple partners. I don't know? I'm not caring about either one getting passed so I'm not out to argue why it could be done those are just the problems I see with it. it's like I don't condone marriages of underage people or animals either, and I see one of the basic impediments being they cannot enter into a contract legally because of their mental development as a logical issue. I still am not concerned with trying to legalize it so I'm not interested in figuring out the whole hows and whys. I do find it socially interesting that it is so reviled in our culture.

BTW---behaviors that happen here in the US happen just as frequently in other countries...just society in these countries choose to ignore it.

Or hide it better

What??? You don't support animal marriages? What if my nice kitty wants to get married and do things the right way to a nice male kitty? She will be out of luck. Then again, I had her spayed so she can't do much anyway

Oh, I'm here, I just decided to sit this one out. I think I'll just watch this on for now.

You were right though! lol

You going to be up late tonight again?

I have to be up early tommorow. A friend of mine is flying to Iraq to see her family and I promised her a ride to the airport.

[Nasturtium 500]

What??? You don't support animal marriages? What if my nice kitty wants to get married and do things the right way to a nice male kitty? She will be out of luck. Then again, I had her spayed so she can't do much anyway

LOL! I meant human and animal marriages.. like if you wanted to marry your cow. Having said that, when I was 3, I decided to marry my cat. I got my mom's wedding veil, grabbed the poor cat like 3-year-olds do in that awkward way nice kitties just let the kid do where it's stretched all to heck and arms are every which way... and I told my mom I would "Be right back! gotta get married!" And I ran outside to the rose arch with him and her veil on my head and her shoes which were HUGE... I wore a stunning sailboat sunsuit with my wonder woman underoos, and then I yelled out "I do!" and said "This sucks! I forgot the rings!!! But I love you forever anyway" and then I ran back inside with him (he was still lettting me hold him) and set him down and told my mom I was married now, and that I could have as much cake as I wanted whenever I wanted because that's what married people do.

ETA: Oh.. so you're going to go to bed early on us tonight?

Edited July 27, 2008 by julianna

[S and S 12]

What??? You don't support animal marriages? What if my nice kitty wants to get married and do things the right way to a nice male kitty? She will be out of luck. Then again, I had her spayed so she can't do much anyway

LOL! I meant human and animal marriages.. like if you wanted to marry your cow. Having said that, when I was 3, I decided to marry my cat. I got my mom's wedding veil, grabbed the poor cat like 3-year-olds do in that awkward way nice kitties just let the kid do where it's stretched all to heck and arms are every which way... and I told my mom I would "Be right back! gotta get married!" And I ran outside to the rose arch with him and her veil on my head and her shoes which were HUGE... I wore a stunning sailboat sunsuit with my wonder woman underoos, and then I yelled out "I do!" and said "This sucks! I forgot the rings!!! But I love you forever anyway" and then I ran back inside with him (he was still lettting me hold him) and set him down and told my mom I was married now, and that I could have as much cake as I wanted whenever I wanted because that's what married people do.

ETA: Oh.. so you're going to go to bed early on us tonight?

That is too funny! Yet so cute. Its hard to find a good cat that will put up with that.

Yeah, I gotta go to bed soon. I need to be up in about 6 hours.

Edited July 27, 2008 by S and S

[Nasturtium 500]

That is too funny! Yet so cute. Its hard to find a good cat that will put up with that.

Yeah, I gotta go to bed soon. I need to be up in about 6 hours.

Sigh. Well have a good, but boring night SLEEPING instead of keeping us late-nighters busy!

Yes, he was a really nice cat. I have one with the exact same disposition now too, and another one which loves to play fetch with toys, and my third one whines until I carry him like a baby everywhere I go.

[S and S 12]

That is too funny! Yet so cute. Its hard to find a good cat that will put up with that.

Yeah, I gotta go to bed soon. I need to be up in about 6 hours.

Sigh. Well have a good, but boring night SLEEPING instead of keeping us late-nighters busy!

Yes, he was a really nice cat. I have one with the exact same disposition now too, and another one which loves to play fetch with toys, and my third one whines until I carry him like a baby everywhere I go.

My current kitty tolerates me holding her for about 5 to 10 seconds depending on her mood, lol. She hasn't been around kids much so they scare her. She does play fetch with toy mice so she has that in common with one of your kitties.

[Nasturtium 500]

My current kitty tolerates me holding her for about 5 to 10 seconds depending on her mood, lol. She hasn't been around kids much so they scare her. She does play fetch with toy mice so she has that in common with one of your kitties.

Some cats don't like to be held... I've always had cats that mostly do like to be held or will at least sit on your lap if the conditions are right.. Puddles will only sit on you if you have a blanet in yuor lap. he will also go under the covers to sleep by your legs if he can.. but hold him and he won't stand that for a second. Belfry has to be in the mood for it, thus the whining. But Ptolemy would live inside you if he could. He also loves to play tag. he'll chase you and tap your achilles tendon and then turn adn run and let you catch him, then he'll chase you... etc.

[S and S 12]

My current kitty tolerates me holding her for about 5 to 10 seconds depending on her mood, lol. She hasn't been around kids much so they scare her. She does play fetch with toy mice so she has that in common with one of your kitties.

Some cats don't like to be held... I've always had cats that mostly do like to be held or will at least sit on your lap if the conditions are right.. Puddles will only sit on you if you have a blanet in yuor lap. he will also go under the covers to sleep by your legs if he can.. but hold him and he won't stand that for a second. Belfry has to be in the mood for it, thus the whining. But Ptolemy would live inside you if he could. He also loves to play tag. he'll chase you and tap your achilles tendon and then turn adn run and let you catch him, then he'll chase you... etc.

I love cats. Your sound like they are full of personality. Manfusha will lay with me in bed for awhile at night, but she has taken to sleeping under the bed for part of the night as well. She only sits in my lap if I'm at the computer or laying with a blanket on the couch. She only lays on my chest if it is morning and she is hungry, lol. Which also includes meowing and purring loudly with some claws digging in to be sure I got the point she is hungry!

[Nasturtium 500]

I love cats. Your sound like they are full of personality. Manfusha will lay with me in bed for awhile at night, but she has taken to sleeping under the bed for part of the night as well. She only sits in my lap if I'm at the computer or laying with a blanket on the couch. She only lays on my chest if it is morning and she is hungry, lol. Which also includes meowing and purring loudly with some claws digging in to be sure I got the point she is hungry!

Me too! I got 2 cats when I was 3, and then after one litter they were fixed and we homed all but one baby.. so then we had 3. I had these three into high school and college and then I got my own cats. Even Ammar likes my cats, although he tried to not like them and was scared of them at first. It was a trying time. Now he can touch them and everything, and I KNOW he and Belfry are friends. Belfry sits in Ammar's spot on the couch and loves all over his stuff. I caught him speaking Arabic to the cats and looking out the windows with them, petting them, and giving them some treats. Yep. Now to convince him that they are moving to Jordan. I don't think it will be a hard sell at this point. I asked him if he would eat them the other day, when I was talking about starving and he said "No! that's like eating your friend!" So we're more than halfway there! Cause I'm not leaving them behind!