That leap of faith...

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

merc... who knew you could speak so eloquently!!! you, my dear friend... are a romantic! and i think that lu is blessed to have you as a soon-to-be husband! *hugs*

I just wanted to prove that I have other things to add to a conversation other than porno names hahahaha.

Hmmmmm did someone mention porno names?????

hehehe..

laura

[faith 0]

merc.. so proud of you!!! we all knew that guttermind of yours was also good for nice comments as well

For those of you who said that those of us who only got to meet their SO's once in person and then filed a k-1 irritates you, well sorry to irritate you. It must be nice to have the luxury that some of us don't have. A lot of us do not have the means, funds, time, or ability to go on multiple visits. While my husband was still in Denmark I could not go visit him. Why? I couldn't leave my children and I couldn't take my children with me. I couldn't afford to go. I couldn't afford the time off work being a single mom. Why didn't he come more? He couldn't take the time off work, he couldn't afford it, etc. Do you realize how much plane tickets can cost???

Just because my husband was only here for 2 months before we got engaged and filed paperwork does not invalidate our relationship. We've been married for a year and a 1/2 now. And I'm happier now than I have ever been in my life.

I know couples that met in person and got married after 2 weeks and stayed married for 20 or more years. Why is that any different than the online versions of that?

It's 2006.. the internet is here to stay. There will always be internet relationships. Get some tolerance and accept them!

[hockeygal 0]

Add me to the list of people who get secretly nervous for those getting married after one visit. However, I also think that if feels right to you, then go for it. I've never regretted trying something out that I want, but I have regretted not doing so.

[mercuryroad 0]

merc.. so proud of you!!! we all knew that guttermind of yours was also good for nice comments as well

I try to keep it to a minimum though......brother dean might start calling me a woman

[Fandango 1,440]

I agree with Jenn, TracyTN and Hockeygal....it makes me nervous to hear of weddings after only having physically met once. I'm sorry, and I don't want to come off as judgemental, but I cannot wrap my head round it.

I agree that with all the talking, you get to know each other sooooo much. My David and I have prolly talked more in 6 years than most people have in a lifetime. But sometimes people can lie. (I'm not referring to me & D btw) And with nothing more to go on than someone's word, how in the world can you tell otherwise?

Edited May 17, 2006 by LisaD

[iceyspots 0]

merc... who knew you could speak so eloquently!!! you, my dear friend... are a romantic! and i think that lu is blessed to have you as a soon-to-be husband! *hugs*

I just wanted to prove that I have other things to add to a conversation other than porno names hahahaha.

Hmmmmm did someone mention porno names?????

hehehe..

laura

Oh no.. the ULTIMATE HIJACK! lol

[mercuryroad 0]

merc... who knew you could speak so eloquently!!! you, my dear friend... are a romantic! and i think that lu is blessed to have you as a soon-to-be husband! *hugs*

I just wanted to prove that I have other things to add to a conversation other than porno names hahahaha.

Hmmmmm did someone mention porno names?????

hehehe..

laura

Oh no.. the ULTIMATE HIJACK! lol

you rang......I've been good

[JenT 0]

Jen, no way would I ever flame anyone for their own beliefs. I do believe in fate and in God and all the rest. I do believe things happen for a reason and there is a reason for everything. I think that ppl tend to look at us who have met online as taboo because it doesnt fall in the norm of things. You would think that people would be more open with it seeing as to how there are much more instances of out of the NORM things that happen (God I hope that makes sense lol). I met Ian when I really was at a point where I didn't want to meet anyone after being hurt by my own ex husband with whom I met locally and then by someone online. What started off as a friendship developed into a marriage, and yes I honestly believe it is down to our communication. When all you have is that, I do believe that you get to know that person on a different level. Again, this is ONLY HOW I FEEL...so please will the certain few who seem to get upset with what myself and others feel to be best for US....dont get to offended. We are NOT mocking your relationship or making your relationship seem as if it isn't as good as ours. Again it really does fall down to what works best for each individual. It really is funny where you can find love.

Laura Mitchell

Thanks Laura... sometimes you never know what people choose to 'take and run away with' in these threads. I felt like I had to speak up a bit, though...

It sounds as though you and I were in the same 'place' emotionally when we met the loves of our lives... that gives me an idea for a poll, actually....

I'm glad that you found what you weren't looking for...

[rebeccajo 14]

Well, what's there to wonder about here anyway, really?

There is always fate, destiny or whatever one chooses to call it in every aspect of life. Whether it be making friends, finding a lover, getting a job, even winning the lotto.

Suffice it to say that intuition maybe plays a big part in things? I know that was a big part of it for me. But I use my intuition in all aspects of my life.

Trust? Fiddlesticks. I say you can be schmoozed to your face and if the liar is bent on manipulation, you won't see it coming. I don't see geographical nearness as some plus there.

So what really makes it so hard to grasp this concept? Is it really the circumstances of meeting on the web that bother some of our members, or the tone of the post? By that I mean whether or not the poster sounds 'starry-eyed' rather than 'eyes wide open'.

Whether you met your love next door or in the next 'window', I believe that falling in love is always a 'leap of faith'. There's no other inner place where one is more vulnerable. And if the inner place opens up first with 'words on a screen' that leads to more.......well then.... to me that's just a blessing of this brave new world.

Edited May 17, 2006 by rebeccajo

[Marilyn. 340]

You get to know someone on a way more personal level because all you can do is talk....

A more personal level? More personal than physically being with them? So people who don't have online relationships have more superficial ones????

I've obviously stepped into the wrong crowd here, strange to be in the minority on this topics because I think I'm usually in the majority here. I really didn't think I'd be the ONLY one who feels the way I do about it.

I'm sorry... I didn't mean to imply that online relationships are the only way to go .....

When all you have is talk you get to know a lot about a person... I know this can happen in person too ...

Before it happened to me I thought people were crazy when they said they met someone online etc....

My heart knew I was falling in love with David before I met him but I actually fell in love with David when I met him in person....

I Don’t Know How It Happened

It took me by surprise

I would sit here and watch as you would say how sweet I was

And how you loved my eyes

We would always talk about anything and everything

And I missed you when you were gone

But when you came back my heart would want to sing a song

I don't how it happened

Or if it could be true

Is it possible to fall in love by watching words on a screen

I don't know

All I know is that my heart is full of love for you!!

Written by MarilynP (May 2002)

Edited May 17, 2006 by MarilynP

[mercuryroad 0]

Trust? Fiddlesticks.

You did not just say Fiddlesticks

[rebeccajo 14]

Trust? Fiddlesticks.

You did not just say Fiddlesticks

Yup.

[mercuryroad 0]

Trust? Fiddlesticks.

You did not just say Fiddlesticks

Yup.

Hmmm....maybe we should give you a vocabulary makeover

In this case I would have went a little old schoola and did a: "Trust? Funk Dat"

[Jenn! 918]

I Don’t Know How It Happened

It took me by surprise

I would sit here and watch as you would say how sweet I was

And how you loved my eyes

We would always talk about anything and everything

And I missed you when you were gone

But when you came back my heart would want to sing a song

I don't how it happened

Or if it could be true

Is it possible to fall in love by watching words on a screen

I don't know

All I know is that my heart is full of love for you!!

Written by MarilynP (May 2002)

That's beautiul, Marilyn!

[CarolineM 0]

I'd like to say this...

Yes my husband and I met in person...but I have to agree that it seems odd to me that you could marry someone having only been in his or her physical presence ONCE.

That said...All of us are in a unique situation here. FOr the most part, with a few exceptions, we are still in the physical presence of our SO's WAAAAY less than a "normal" relationship.

I was with Stewart for five years...but during that five years we were only together about a month a year...You know? I mean Australia is a LONG ### WAys away!

We of course did all the LD stuff you do, talking etc etc but still had it been an American here in FLorida - we would have spent WAY more time together.

I think it's a leap of faith either way you look at!! No matter how you meet your SO!! You know?

I will say I lived with my ex fiance for 9 months...yet I know more about Stewart after having LIVED with him (let's see, five years, one month each...March --- present) 7 months...married for 5 of those...because he's my soul mate and I believe that!! I can honestly say...(even though I disagree with it) had I only met him once...I'd still marry him again :)