Where did she go?

[panamania79 2]

I'm getting lost here, who is that lady helping you with your "dates"???

Nobody,Maria is just helping him with the immigration papers.He's just a Mac-Daddy getting his own dates.Oh yeah,and some guy at the hotel wants to fix him up with his sister.

[Ken y Leidys 20]

I´m back at the hotel. Here´s a recap on my trip.

I leave Thursday morning - early. So, tomorrow is my last full day. My plans are to look for CDs and DVDs (music-related only), and just soak in the atmosphere, possibly one last time. This evening, I spent at Marias house. Maria told me about her life, the lives of her clients who have come to Colombia searching for, ¨Love¨and the different things they tend to find.

The Cast:

Ken - VJ Member from Southern California

Onelis - exFiance from Barranquilla

Maria - Administrative Visa Assistant from Barranquilla

Leidys - new ¨friend¨ from Barranquilla

Viviana - sister of Toñio - looking for ¨friendship¨, possibly more...

Toñio - Bellhop at Hotel in Barranquilla

Stefanie - younger sister of Onelis

Jesus - young 20-something Rap Producer originally from Cuba

After lunch, I went to the Internet Cafe where I visited with Jesus. We talked a bit, I called Leidys on the phone, and she was reading, as rain began to fall in her town of Soledad, just south of Barranquilla. I told her that I would talk to Maria, and we would arrange something after I leave Marias home office. It was already 3:15 when I called Maria. Our plans were for me to meet with her at 4:30 p.m. at her place. Change of clothing and shower, now I´m ready.

I quickly packed away my Puerto Peñasco, Mexico t-shirt - covered in Onelis´ makeup. I will save this for how ever long I decide to save it. Out the door, into the steam-bath air of Barranquilla.

The taxi cab driver found Maria´s home after driving the wrong-way on a one-way street. I paid my 6,000 pesos ($3.50) cab fare, up to the 3rd floor, and I was greeted by this really friendly woman who spoke perfect English - making me feel like I was back home again.

The interior of Maria´s home appeared bare. As a photographer, she explained that without her equipment which had been stolen, she chose not to place anything on her walls. Instead, textured hues of yellow covered some of the walls while the entryways into the rest of her apartment were just above 6 feet, my height. I joked that her house reminded me of a midgets home. Maria laughed saying, ¨But I´m short, so its´fine!¨ Maria laid it out like this - She didn´t quite understand Onelis´motives. Everything seemed strange. She could have possibly had another man in town, someone her family did not approve of, but they liked me better. Or, she was ready to fail by moving someplace where she didn´t quite understand the language, culture, etc. Or, she might never wanted anything more than friendship. Who knows, but I am so

I´m back at the hotel. Here´s a recap on my trip.

I leave Thursday morning - early. So, tomorrow is my last full day. My plans are to look for CDs and DVDs (music-related only), and just soak in the atmosphere, possibly one last time. This evening, I spent at Marias house. Maria told me about her life, the lives of her clients who have come to Colombia searching for, ¨Love¨and the different things they tend to find.

The Cast:

Ken - VJ Member from Southern California

Onelis - exFiance from Barranquilla

Maria - Administrative Visa Assistant from Barranquilla

Leidys - new ¨friend¨ from Barranquilla

Viviana - sister of Toñio - looking for ¨friendship¨, possibly more...

Toñio - Bellhop at Hotel in Barranquilla

Stefanie - younger sister of Onelis

Jesus - young 20-something Rap Producer originally from Cuba

After lunch, I went to the Internet Cafe where I visited with Jesus. We talked a bit, I called Leidys on the phone, and she was reading, as rain began to fall in her town of Soledad, just south of Barranquilla. I told her that I would talk to Maria, and we would arrange something after I leave Marias home office. It was already 3:15 when I called Maria. Our plans were for me to meet with her at 4:30 p.m. at her place. Change of clothing and shower, now I´m ready.

I quickly packed away my Puerto Peñasco, Mexico t-shirt - covered in Onelis´ makeup. I will save this for how ever long I decide to save it. Out the door, into the steam-bath air of Barranquilla.

The taxi cab driver found Maria´s home after driving the wrong-way on a one-way street. I paid my 6,000 pesos ($3.50) cab fare, up to the 3rd floor, and I was greeted by this really friendly woman who spoke perfect English - making me feel like I was back home again.

The interior of Maria´s home appeared bare. As a photographer, she explained that without her equipment which had been stolen, she chose not to place anything on her walls. Instead, textured hues of yellow covered some of the walls while the entryways into the rest of her apartment were just above 6 feet, my height. I joked that her house reminded me of a midgets home. Maria laughed saying, ¨But I´m short, so its´fine!¨ Maria laid it out like this - She didn´t quite understand Onelis´motives. Everything seemed strange. She could have possibly had another man in town, someone her family did not approve of, but they liked me better. Or, she was ready to fail by moving someplace where she didn´t quite understand the language, culture, etc. Or, she might never wanted anything more than friendship. Who knows, but I am so glad that Maria could provide her Colombian-woman´s insight.

I took some photos with Maria which I will post here in a few days (along with all of the others), and we said our goodbyes. Maria was my bright light in this murky Caribbean metropolis of Barranquilla. She broke down the war between the sexes, culture vs. progress, and her holding women accountable for allowing Mujeriego men to be infieles or ¨Cheaters.¨ Maria offered so many creative pointers that I would recommend her consutation to anyone planning a rendezvous with a nice Costeña in Barranquilla.

I walked away from Maria´s home confused, in shock. My divorce cost me $110,000.00 cash. Maria told me about all of the lies and fraud that sometimes get covered up in the linguistic/cultural mish-mash which she has witnessed over the years. Her final word of advice, ¨It is not going to work unless the two people are good for each other. Period.¨

I caught a cab to the Cathedral - my usual meeting place with Leidys. We both met up at 8 p.m.

to be continued...

[panamania79 2]

I´m back at the hotel. Here´s a recap on my trip.

I leave Thursday morning - early. So, tomorrow is my last full day. My plans are to look for CDs and DVDs (music-related only), and just soak in the atmosphere, possibly one last time. This evening, I spent at Marias house. Maria told me about her life, the lives of her clients who have come to Colombia searching for, ¨Love¨and the different things they tend to find.

The Cast:

Ken - VJ Member from Southern California

Onelis - exFiance from Barranquilla

Maria - Administrative Visa Assistant from Barranquilla

Leidys - new ¨friend¨ from Barranquilla

Viviana - sister of Toñio - looking for ¨friendship¨, possibly more...

Toñio - Bellhop at Hotel in Barranquilla

Stefanie - younger sister of Onelis

Jesus - young 20-something Rap Producer originally from Cuba

After lunch, I went to the Internet Cafe where I visited with Jesus. We talked a bit, I called Leidys on the phone, and she was reading, as rain began to fall in her town of Soledad, just south of Barranquilla. I told her that I would talk to Maria, and we would arrange something after I leave Marias home office. It was already 3:15 when I called Maria. Our plans were for me to meet with her at 4:30 p.m. at her place. Change of clothing and shower, now I´m ready.

I quickly packed away my Puerto Peñasco, Mexico t-shirt - covered in Onelis´ makeup. I will save this for how ever long I decide to save it. Out the door, into the steam-bath air of Barranquilla.

The taxi cab driver found Maria´s home after driving the wrong-way on a one-way street. I paid my 6,000 pesos ($3.50) cab fare, up to the 3rd floor, and I was greeted by this really friendly woman who spoke perfect English - making me feel like I was back home again.

The interior of Maria´s home appeared bare. As a photographer, she explained that without her equipment which had been stolen, she chose not to place anything on her walls. Instead, textured hues of yellow covered some of the walls while the entryways into the rest of her apartment were just above 6 feet, my height. I joked that her house reminded me of a midgets home. Maria laughed saying, ¨But I´m short, so its´fine!¨ Maria laid it out like this - She didn´t quite understand Onelis´motives. Everything seemed strange. She could have possibly had another man in town, someone her family did not approve of, but they liked me better. Or, she was ready to fail by moving someplace where she didn´t quite understand the language, culture, etc. Or, she might never wanted anything more than friendship. Who knows, but I am so

I´m back at the hotel. Here´s a recap on my trip.

I leave Thursday morning - early. So, tomorrow is my last full day. My plans are to look for CDs and DVDs (music-related only), and just soak in the atmosphere, possibly one last time. This evening, I spent at Marias house. Maria told me about her life, the lives of her clients who have come to Colombia searching for, ¨Love¨and the different things they tend to find.

The Cast:

Ken - VJ Member from Southern California

Onelis - exFiance from Barranquilla

Maria - Administrative Visa Assistant from Barranquilla

Leidys - new ¨friend¨ from Barranquilla

Viviana - sister of Toñio - looking for ¨friendship¨, possibly more...

Toñio - Bellhop at Hotel in Barranquilla

Stefanie - younger sister of Onelis

Jesus - young 20-something Rap Producer originally from Cuba

After lunch, I went to the Internet Cafe where I visited with Jesus. We talked a bit, I called Leidys on the phone, and she was reading, as rain began to fall in her town of Soledad, just south of Barranquilla. I told her that I would talk to Maria, and we would arrange something after I leave Marias home office. It was already 3:15 when I called Maria. Our plans were for me to meet with her at 4:30 p.m. at her place. Change of clothing and shower, now I´m ready.

I quickly packed away my Puerto Peñasco, Mexico t-shirt - covered in Onelis´ makeup. I will save this for how ever long I decide to save it. Out the door, into the steam-bath air of Barranquilla.

The taxi cab driver found Maria´s home after driving the wrong-way on a one-way street. I paid my 6,000 pesos ($3.50) cab fare, up to the 3rd floor, and I was greeted by this really friendly woman who spoke perfect English - making me feel like I was back home again.

The interior of Maria´s home appeared bare. As a photographer, she explained that without her equipment which had been stolen, she chose not to place anything on her walls. Instead, textured hues of yellow covered some of the walls while the entryways into the rest of her apartment were just above 6 feet, my height. I joked that her house reminded me of a midgets home. Maria laughed saying, ¨But I´m short, so its´fine!¨ Maria laid it out like this - She didn´t quite understand Onelis´motives. Everything seemed strange. She could have possibly had another man in town, someone her family did not approve of, but they liked me better. Or, she was ready to fail by moving someplace where she didn´t quite understand the language, culture, etc. Or, she might never wanted anything more than friendship. Who knows, but I am so glad that Maria could provide her Colombian-woman´s insight.

I took some photos with Maria which I will post here in a few days (along with all of the others), and we said our goodbyes. Maria was my bright light in this murky Caribbean metropolis of Barranquilla. She broke down the war between the sexes, culture vs. progress, and her holding women accountable for allowing Mujeriego men to be infieles or ¨Cheaters.¨ Maria offered so many creative pointers that I would recommend her consutation to anyone planning a rendezvous with a nice Costeña in Barranquilla.

I walked away from Maria´s home confused, in shock. My divorce cost me $110,000.00 cash. Maria told me about all of the lies and fraud that sometimes get covered up in the linguistic/cultural mish-mash which she has witnessed over the years. Her final word of advice, ¨It is not going to work unless the two people are good for each other. Period.¨

I caught a cab to the Cathedral - my usual meeting place with Leidys. We both met up at 8 p.m.

to be continued...

You could actually write your own script.

[Ken y Leidys 20]

Leidys arrived on the back of a motorcycle taxi. She wore an orange top, her hair in a ponytail, and skin-tight jeans, like every woman here in Barranquilla wears. She hobbled on her right foot, as her left foot gave her pain. We walked to a park bench, surrounded by other park benches where Leidys began asking me questions about Onelis.

¨Ken, when are you going to see Onelis next? Are you planning to spend your last full day with her? What did Maria say about Onelis?¨

I explained that Onelis and I are finished. We spent our last time together today, and this was it. Nada mas. After speaking with Maria about what she had witnessed in June, questioning Onelis on her intent to marry her fiance Ken, I quickly decided that she is someone I am better off not knowing. Hearing this made Leidys happy. She then told me, ¨You are who I want to be with forever.¨ ¨Forever?¨ I asked... ¨Para siempre¨ she repeated.

My mind replayed the events in the food court, the Backstreet Boys song, the hotel room... Was I ready to make up my mind today on who I wanted to spend the rest of my life? I´m too confused at the moment. Onelis was my Colombian queen. My reina. Saying goodbye to her was too painful. But, exactly one year ago, I said goodbye to my friend Andrew. Andrew died of Leukemia. His advice at the time was for me to find someone local. He told me of Visa horror stories which had plauged friends in San Jose, CA. He simply did not advise it. His wife Gretchen had no choice but to move on. I used her strength as a guide, but although the circumstances are different, the attitude is something I had to pattern my own with. Melanie too. One of my best friends passed away tragically in an auto accident one year prior to Andrew during a Transmitter-hunt in Central California. Davids son had just turned 1 yr. old. Melanie is now engaged, but still mourns the death of her beloved David.

Leidys and I walked into Olympica supermarket, and we went upstairs to the food court for dinner. Rice and Chicken, an energy drink for her, mineral water for me. Conversation too, was on the menu. Leidys spoke about a physical competency that she had missed out on. She was attempting to join the Colombian Military forces, but out of a pool of 100 candidates, only 5 would be chosen. This was one of her disappointments. Now, her focus has turned to her English studies, and to having children with a nice man.

I looked Leidys up and down, all over. Is this who I want to spend my life with? Am I ready to make this sort of decision? Life back home sucks. I eat alone, sleep alone, exercise alone. My two dogs keep me company, but I prefer having myself a nice family. My gut told me the one word, ¨Undecided.¨ I need to think this over. Too much has happened in one day for me to figure out. Undecided...

Edited July 16, 2008 by Ken y Onelis

[MrsCat 6]

OMG - this is my favorite post yet, GO FOR IT! STAY - send for the dogs. Or marry her and bring her home. I don't care which one. Oh man - I'm dying over here Ken.

[Ken y Leidys 20]

OMG - this is my favorite post yet, GO FOR IT! STAY - send for the dogs. Or marry her and bring her home. I don't care which one. Oh man - I'm dying over here Ken.

The decision now is to nurture my relationship with Leidys, satisfy my curiosity with Viviana, not talk to anyone, or show up at Onelis´ doorstep tomorrow morning at 6 a.m....

[MrsCat 6]

OMG - this is my favorite post yet, GO FOR IT! STAY - send for the dogs. Or marry her and bring her home. I don't care which one. Oh man - I'm dying over here Ken.

The decision now is to nurture my relationship with Leidys, satisfy my curiosity with Viviana, not talk to anyone, or show up at Onelis´ doorstep tomorrow morning at 6 a.m....

I appreciate this sober approach - especially the not showing up on the doorstep. Unless you're dropping off a bag of flaming dog poop - then I want cell phone pics of that event.

Edited July 16, 2008 by cattattude

[merijan 0]

I feel like I am watching a Spanish soap opera.... I will tune in tommorow to see what happens.

[CaNdiD wiTcH 0]

I feel like I am watching a Spanish soap opera.... I will tune in tommorow to see what happens.

I would like to know what will happen next. This seems to be a "to be continued" soap opera..

[DairyFarmer 1]

Like everyone else Ken I look forward to the next installment of your life.

It would be good to see some more light at the end of the tunnel you've been going through.

[nightbreed 0]

Good for the girl she in my opinion was looking for a rich guy to support her and family not a burnt out dead beat loser too many of him to go around.

[panamania79 2]

OMG - this is my favorite post yet, GO FOR IT! STAY - send for the dogs. Or marry her and bring her home. I don't care which one. Oh man - I'm dying over here Ken.

The decision now is to nurture my relationship with Leidys, satisfy my curiosity with Viviana, not talk to anyone, or show up at Onelis´ doorstep tomorrow morning at 6 a.m....

I appreciate this sober approach - especially the not showing up on the doorstep. Unless you're dropping off a bag of flaming dog poop - then I want cell phone pics of that event.

[panamania79 2]

I feel like I am watching a Spanish soap opera.... I will tune in tommorow to see what happens.

I would like to know what will happen next. This seems to be a "to be continued" soap opera..

"Tu hiciste tus decisiones.............."

[panamania79 2]

Leidys arrived on the back of a motorcycle taxi. She wore an orange top, her hair in a ponytail, and skin-tight jeans, like every woman here in Barranquilla wears. She hobbled on her right foot, as her left foot gave her pain. We walked to a park bench, surrounded by other park benches where Leidys began asking me questions about Onelis.

¨Ken, when are you going to see Onelis next? Are you planning to spend your last full day with her? What did Maria say about Onelis?¨

I explained that Onelis and I are finished. We spent our last time together today, and this was it. Nada mas. After speaking with Maria about what she had witnessed in June, questioning Onelis on her intent to marry her fiance Ken, I quickly decided that she is someone I am better off not knowing. Hearing this made Leidys happy. She then told me, ¨You are who I want to be with forever.¨ ¨Forever?¨ I asked... ¨Para siempre¨ she repeated.

My mind replayed the events in the food court, the Backstreet Boys song, the hotel room... Was I ready to make up my mind today on who I wanted to spend the rest of my life? I´m too confused at the moment. Onelis was my Colombian queen. My reina. Saying goodbye to her was too painful. But, exactly one year ago, I said goodbye to my friend Andrew. Andrew died of Leukemia. His advice at the time was for me to find someone local. He told me of Visa horror stories which had plauged friends in San Jose, CA. He simply did not advise it. His wife Gretchen had no choice but to move on. I used her strength as a guide, but although the circumstances are different, the attitude is something I had to pattern my own with. Melanie too. One of my best friends passed away tragically in an auto accident one year prior to Andrew during a Transmitter-hunt in Central California. Davids son had just turned 1 yr. old. Melanie is now engaged, but still mourns the death of her beloved David.

Leidys and I walked into Olympica supermarket, and we went upstairs to the food court for dinner. Rice and Chicken, an energy drink for her, mineral water for me. Conversation too, was on the menu. Leidys spoke about a physical competency that she had missed out on. She was attempting to join the Colombian Military forces, but out of a pool of 100 candidates, only 5 would be chosen. This was one of her disappointments. Now, her focus has turned to her English studies, and to having children with a nice man.

I looked Leidys up and down, all over. Is this who I want to spend my life with? Am I ready to make this sort of decision? Life back home sucks. I eat alone, sleep alone, exercise alone. My two dogs keep me company, but I prefer having myself a nice family. My gut told me the one word, ¨Undecided.¨ I need to think this over. Too much has happened in one day for me to figure out. Undecided...

Like I keep telling you,it's Onelis's loss.There are 100 costenas who would line up to take her place.

Let's stay tuned to the next episode of..................

Edited July 16, 2008 by panamania79

[Ken y Leidys 20]

24 hours to go. Most options are open. I have coins in my pocket to give Viviana a call. Perhaps for brunch. Once again, I have no expectations - which is how so many relationships begin. 13 yrs. ago, I was in need of a ride to the store. I had been providing support on the Tito Puente Jr. ¨Latin Fest ´95 ¨ tour up in Toronto for 1 week. Afterwards, I took a bus to E. Lansing, MI where a good friend of mine had moved. She was taking classes nearby at MSU when a friend of hers called. Suzanne offered to drive me to the store, later we went shopping, then clubbing, then eventually we married. The unraveling began when cult members began shuttling her to their, ¨meetings¨.

Viviana is probably at home right now. If not, at least I gave it a shot. I´ll call her from the street so my conversation is not eavesdropped on. Onelis and I are finished. Chapter ended. Book closed. All of our photos are going on a DVD-R when I get home, Visa papers packed into a scrapbook I plan on assembling. Then, packed away. The year we had spent together seemed to work so well at first. In the hotel room, we sat and talked about her dreams this relationship brought her. The happiness, anticipating my 3 visits. She still wants those calls and emails, but I told her they wouldn´t let us detatch. Time and space will give me peace and calm.

Jobana is working behind the front desk. An attractive Costeña about 5ft3, freckles, and a beautiful smile. Toñio revealed to me that she was in fact married when I asked Saturday if she had a significant other or not. I couldn´t believe it! She didn´t stare at me like she was married, but I remember Maria and Lani´s words - ¨...you just can´t trust all of the Costeñas out there. They can be motivated by many things.¨ Viviana is next. I thought Onelis was my end-all, but meeting Leidys proved me wrong. Maria revealed so many sobering tales of woe, that my eyes are now wide open. From her apartment, you could see the barges ambling up the Magdalena river into the Caribbean. Steam raising from the ships against steel-grey skies, sticky green foilage, she has a full view from her perch of all that is Barranquilla. What better location than to educate me on the ways of her city.

Toñio saluted me, and just dropped off a cup of Colombias best. Hot and sweet. Dark, and framed in porcelain - a hint of steam rising.