I'm out!

[totes 0]

I hesitated to post in this forum early on because I read some of the BS that goes on here but.... I was looking for support during my trying process and decided that this was probably the best place to do it.

What I've see is ugliness, judgement and what appears to be superiority. I've decided that many of the people in this forum only want topics posted that they can be "know it alls" to (which is soooooo not possible), talk down to people (that cracks me up) and those that look for a single reason to jump on someone and I've seen in at least a dozen times since I've been here.

Many of you speak of God.... wow! That surprises me given some of the BS that goes on here. I wasn't looking for drama, I'm looking for support so.... I"m out.

Good luck with your journey's and may God bless us all!

[Truth be Told 0]

I am sorry I did not mean to upset you.

[Ta Ta 1]

Sorry if I had anything to do with your exit from VJ, but just because I am a Christian does not mean I have no opinion. I don't know if your post was directed at me or not since I responded to you, but I feel I have to speak up against discrimination not out of a sense of superiority, but because it is the right thing to do.

I hope you will stick around and don't let this bother you.

[idocare 3]

Hey thanks for posting, If you reread my post you and others will see that I only spoke from my experience, I was married to a Nigerian thus that's partly where I gained my experience. Many of people that started this journey around the same time as I did married people from all over the globe. Some have already came back to VJ and spoke of their betrayal/ success, I'm fully aware that deception isn't just in one country, as I'm aware that some marriages are still going strong with Americans that are married to people from countries that I never heard of. I'm also a member of the Romance Scams site and I read it every once in a while just like I do this site.

Although it may not be others passion to continually post their story it is a passion of mines. I only speak in general but have to stay true to what happened to me. I guess what I want to say to you, is not to get too uptight over what someone might type concerning another, it's just their oppinion period. They hold no weight or statis with me and I hope that you won't let it affect you. There can be some good information on this site and you can gain some lasting friendships with others.

[Simply_Uno 1]

hello "tony and tess,"

I understand your frustrations .

I hope you don't leave, but merely take a hiatus of sorts .

I have noticed that it can and does get very "hot" in herrre.

But by the same token, it can be very light hearted and uplifting .

I personally don't subscribe to "bashing" a nation of people (you never know where your ancestry hails from) .

If at possible, sign in anonymously and start "lurking" then you can do "drive-by" postings.

But whatever you decide, take care of you and get the resources you need for your journeys in this life B) .

UNO

[Enlighten one :) 5]

Hello Tony and Tess,

I have been there, seen that, and it is sad to say that you are correct. Some people only want to hear from you if you agree with them. I make sure I post when needing information or when I might be able to give some or support.

I agree with idocare's mission. I know several women on here that have been through what she has, but are not ready to share. If her post can save just one person from heartache and financial ruin, I support her every step of the way.

Thank you for being a part of our Journeys.

Shalom,

Mrs. Jibowu

I hesitated to post in this forum early on because I read some of the BS that goes on here but.... I was looking for support during my trying process and decided that this was probably the best place to do it.

What I've see is ugliness, judgement and what appears to be superiority. I've decided that many of the people in this forum only want topics posted that they can be "know it alls" to (which is soooooo not possible), talk down to people (that cracks me up) and those that look for a single reason to jump on someone and I've seen in at least a dozen times since I've been here.

Many of you speak of God.... wow! That surprises me given some of the BS that goes on here. I wasn't looking for drama, I'm looking for support so.... I"m out.

Good luck with your journey's and may God bless us all!

[Enlighten one :) 5]

I changed my name to lurking, not knowing I could not change it back for a year.

I try not to bash any of GOD's children, just the action of them.

My hiatus was a long one, but now my laptop is at the shop. I took me 2 months to get it there. I thank GOD for the piece that he has brought to my life by taking away the internet.

hello "tony and tess,"

I understand your frustrations .

I hope you don't leave, but merely take a hiatus of sorts .

I have noticed that it can and does get very "hot" in herrre.

But by the same token, it can be very light hearted and uplifting .

I personally don't subscribe to "bashing" a nation of people (you never know where your ancestry hails from) .

If at possible, sign in anonymously and start "lurking" then you can do "drive-by" postings.

But whatever you decide, take care of you and get the resources you need for your journeys in this life B) .

UNO

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

I hesitated to post in this forum early on because I read some of the BS that goes on here but.... I was looking for support during my trying process and decided that this was probably the best place to do it.

What I've see is ugliness, judgement and what appears to be superiority. I've decided that many of the people in this forum only want topics posted that they can be "know it alls" to (which is soooooo not possible), talk down to people (that cracks me up) and those that look for a single reason to jump on someone and I've seen in at least a dozen times since I've been here.

Many of you speak of God.... wow! That surprises me given some of the BS that goes on here. I wasn't looking for drama, I'm looking for support so.... I"m out.

Good luck with your journey's and may God bless us all!

I've been on here for a little while. I've gotten sucked into discussions before thinking that we were all adults and could share thoughts and opinions. I believe that the anonymity of the internet affects the way people post on VJ. I avoid threads that create havoc now. That's the power of personal choice and responsibility. VJ is a wonderful resource and support for the visa journey and that's how I use it now. It's your choice to leave obviously, but there is another choice, and that is to use VJ selectively. Don't expect maturity or well rounded opinions on VJ about anything other than visa related questions. I'll be here girl. So you can always PM or email me....even when you just need to vent cause you're missing your sweetie. Lord knows I've done it on here a million times. [hugs]

Z

[Zee Bee 61]

Leaving is your decision but why leave over something that has just happened in one thread? Has it really diminished your VJ experience that much? I always say, you don't have to read every post here on VJ. There are many other areas here on VJ where you can find the support that you need. You can even start your own thread.

You make VJ what you want for you. Contribute, be active, ignore stupid posts, be helpful to others. Everyone is stating their opinion, right or not. I myself have contributing to the massive derailing of threads but that's what life is about. Not everything is going to be the way you want.

You just need to be selective about what you read and not take anything too personally.

[LovinLiberia 0]

hello "tony and tess,"

I understand your frustrations .

I hope you don't leave, but merely take a hiatus of sorts .

I have noticed that it can and does get very "hot" in herrre.

But by the same token, it can be very light hearted and uplifting .

I personally don't subscribe to "bashing" a nation of people (you never know where your ancestry hails from) .

If at possible, sign in anonymously and start "lurking" then you can do "drive-by" postings.

But whatever you decide, take care of you and get the resources you need for your journeys in this life B) .

UNO

LOL @ drive-by postings...

Leaving is your decision but why leave over something that has just happened in one thread? Has it really diminished your VJ experience that much? I always say, you don't have to read every post here on VJ. There are many other areas here on VJ where you can find the support that you need. You can even start your own thread.

You make VJ what you want for you. Contribute, be active, ignore stupid posts, be helpful to others. Everyone is stating their opinion, right or not. I myself have contributing to the massive derailing of threads but that's what life is about. Not everything is going to be the way you want.

You just need to be selective about what you read and not take anything too personally.

I couldn't have said it better myself. Also, you don't see this kind of stuff in this forum everyday. For the most part, it is a pretty peaceful place with lots of information available. Of course you can make the decision to leave, but I would hope that this incident wouldn't be the deciding factor.

[forchika 4]

Hello Tony and Tess,

I hope you decide to stay with us on VJ, this sort of thing does not happen often but when it does you just have to not take anything personal. I have found that the best way to combat confrontation is to kill'em with silence. I hope your time in AP is short lived and you are able to reunite with your love one soon.

[totes 0]

Hello Tony and Tess,

I hope you decide to stay with us on VJ, this sort of thing does not happen often but when it does you just have to not take anything personal. I have found that the best way to combat confrontation is to kill'em with silence. I hope your time in AP is short lived and you are able to reunite with your love one soon.

After some thought, I must say that I was overly sensitive about the subject and obviously didn't/don't have the whole picture. I generally don't let things like this get to me.... I apoligize for "reacting". This really is a great site with great people.

Thanks for all of your support!

hugs

tess

[Zee Bee 61]

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

Hello Tony and Tess,

I hope you decide to stay with us on VJ, this sort of thing does not happen often but when it does you just have to not take anything personal. I have found that the best way to combat confrontation is to kill'em with silence. I hope your time in AP is short lived and you are able to reunite with your love one soon.

After some thought, I must say that I was overly sensitive about the subject and obviously didn't/don't have the whole picture. I generally don't let things like this get to me.... I apoligize for "reacting". This really is a great site with great people.

Thanks for all of your support!

hugs

tess

[hugs]

Welcome back sister-friend!

Now, let's focus on me!

We've got our interview next week. We need prayer and support now. Hop to it miss missy!

[LovinLiberia 0]

Hello Tony and Tess,

I hope you decide to stay with us on VJ, this sort of thing does not happen often but when it does you just have to not take anything personal. I have found that the best way to combat confrontation is to kill'em with silence. I hope your time in AP is short lived and you are able to reunite with your love one soon.

After some thought, I must say that I was overly sensitive about the subject and obviously didn't/don't have the whole picture. I generally don't let things like this get to me.... I apoligize for "reacting". This really is a great site with great people.

Thanks for all of your support!

hugs

tess

I'm REALLY glad that you decided to stay and not leave this place. Welcome back! Don't worry about "reacting"...we all do it from time to time.