IS YOUR WIFE THE SAME ONCE IN THE USA???

[ChasUK 0]

All I know is that my Yank girlfriend is good at cooking, laundry, housework etc, she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

Whoo hooo

yeah, rrrrrrrrrright!!!

[TracyTN 237]

All I know is that my Yank girlfriend is good at cooking, laundry, housework etc, she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

Whoo hooo

yeah, rrrrrrrrrright!!!

[rebeccajo 14]

All I know is that my Yank girlfriend is good at cooking, laundry, housework etc, she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

*now getting up off the floor*

Yeah Chas. I read that about you on the bathroom wall in Victoria.......

[meauxna 15]

she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

Whoo hooo

Boy, you shouldn't be joking about that with your fancy long hair and purdy teeth. We already reckon she's bought and paid for your sweet stuff!

(that's funnier when you hear it in my fake hillbilly accent )

[ChasUK 0]

All I know is that my Yank girlfriend is good at cooking, laundry, housework etc, she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

*now getting up off the floor*

Yeah Chas. I read that about you on the bathroom wall in Victoria.......

You should read what is written in the loos at Kings Cross about me. I'm famous!!!

she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

Whoo hooo

Boy, you shouldn't be joking about that with your fancy long hair and purdy teeth. We already reckon she's bought and paid for your sweet stuff!

(that's funnier when you hear it in my fake hillbilly accent )

LOL, yeah you're prolly right. BUT, let's not forget. I'm from England. I don't have purdy teeth.

All my teeth are cracked and broken..........

.........BOTH of them !!!!

[Fandango 1,439]

All I know is that my Yank girlfriend is good at cooking, laundry, housework etc, she's a great way for me to get into the US so I can become a male prossy and deal drugs.

Whoo hooo

yeah, rrrrrrrrrright!!!

But she is an excellent instigator of the post!!!!

Well...

it seems like this discussion never ends... anyways... first of all I do have to admit that I completely missunderstood the very first post and thougth exactly like most of the people that responded to it, I almost responded the same way, becasue it does sound like you want a latin american woman with you so she can do your laundry, make you dinner, etc etc... but I think we have realized after so many posts, sarcastic responses, etc etc that that is not what you meant. I am from Venezuela, and I just got here about 2 months ago, well I did live in the US for 5 years, went to school here etc etc..so iguess I can tell you if we do change or not... first of all, you should know that teh values we have from home, from our culture and from our family are too strong and inside of us and we will never let them go becasue they are part of us, itis what makes us, and if we ever do let them go then it means we didn't really have them... so, one of thoe values is family, family is extremely important to us and with a job or without a job we will always make it our first piority, we will always take care of teh house becasue it is ours, becasue it makes us feel good for it to look nice, becasue it is home, not becasue we have to, we will take care of our husband, boyfriend or fiancee becsue we want to, not becasue we have to.... it comes from our hearts... Cami expressed it very well.. we do all these things becsue we care... and i do agree with her and Latin American Macho Men... most of themdo not apreciate all that, they tak it from granted and expect it, wich is even worse, thy don't see we do it from the heart, it is sad... but we still do it, mayb even sadder.. anyways... my point is... I did change when i came to the US, well I was 17, sill a kid, unfortunately i became less wwarm towards peope becasue North Americans are a little colder than we are, and I kinda became a bit less sentimental than I was before.. but that never took away my values and what i wanted to do from teh heart, my friends are like family and I take care of them... I am extremely independent I do not like to depend on anything or anyone, and from having witnessed the Latin American Macho beahviors I think I am a bit of a Feminist myself... actually I am .... I beleive we shoudl be independent and never be there to be anoyone's servant... that doesn't mean I don't cook for my fiancee, or I don't clean the house, or I won' take care of my kids, it means I respect myself, and when I do all these things I don't do it for someone else, I do it for me, becasue it makes me feel good to make someone else feel good,cared and loved.... and I know he apreciates it very much... I am not sure if I made my point clear, but teh main thing is, values are something we very rarely le go off no matter where to the world we move to, they will always come wih us and we will always make them work and adjust them into the new culture we are living in... I hope thsihelped a little... I just wish you would've written the first post better that way we wouldn't have reacted so negative a first... bu I do hope that what w all thought you meant a first is not thatand it is what i think you meant.... sounds like a riddle... anyways.... don't worry, she will not change her values, yes she will become more independt of course and will realize that women here are different and in a waymay adopt some of their things wich are not all bad, but she will always have her values, her passion and her heart...

Dani

So very eloquently expressed.

Oh yeah, and I thought it was excellent how she for a whole nation of women.

[Satisfaction 1]

I haven't followed the whole thread here. All I can say is that every society has its standard of what is acceptable. One can't deny that the American "way of life" is quite different from those in other parts of the world. It is not racism, that’s just the way it is. America is a capitalist country, which values individualism and enterprise. It has its good side, but it has its downfall too: people tend to be more egocentric and materialistic here as a result, whether they are male or female. It is not a matter of sex/gender, but rather a matter of education and culture.

PS: you should watch “Raw”, a show that Eddie Murphy made in the early 80's. It is still available on VHS and perhaps now on DVD. It gives an interesting insight into relationships.

[Identity 0]

Interesting read.

[rob&ana 0]

I tried and tried… and I really think this thread should die… (just like Romeo)…

I will have to stand on materialistic side of this. And coming from Venezuela, I have to say that the way that Camila and Danielle have expressed, is the way our mothers were brought up, and the way they brought us up too. I believe (and I’ve seen this in my own mother), that women in my country (and probably in most Latin American countries are taught that we have to “serve” our men (meaning, father, brother, cousins or husband). And in my Mom’s generation, I’ve seen many women just “putting up” with a whole bunch of ####### because they did not have the means to get out of a relationship and support a family on their own. It’s different now though. I believe that women now in Latin America are more prepared and independent, and they work, and their kids are in daycare, and then they still find time to get all dolled up for the hubby or simply the world. But then again, we are simply copying the “feminist” way of American women.

I COMPLETELY agree with Desertfox. And I came to the conclusion that either the OP’s fiancée was really young and naïve, or she came from a very RURAL place, or… she’s playing the OP, because if they met through a website, then she must know something about something. I do not believe that any women in this day and age, does not know that women abort unwanted children (that made me REALLY suspicious). It’s true, Latin American women might be better “house broken”, but again, it’s just part of the culture.

Will she change?? Like someone posted already. I sure hope she does. No one should be used to feed an ego; no one should be used to make another one feel big and powerful.

Just my two cents… and we should close this account. 

[Fandango 1,439]

I tried and tried… and I really think this thread should die… (just like Romeo)…

I will have to stand on materialistic side of this. And coming from Venezuela, I have to say that the way that Camila and Danielle have expressed, is the way our mothers were brought up, and the way they brought us up too. I believe (and I’ve seen this in my own mother), that women in my country (and probably in most Latin American countries are taught that we have to “serve” our men (meaning, father, brother, cousins or husband). And in my Mom’s generation, I’ve seen many women just “putting up” with a whole bunch of ####### because they did not have the means to get out of a relationship and support a family on their own. It’s different now though. I believe that women now in Latin America are more prepared and independent, and they work, and their kids are in daycare, and then they still find time to get all dolled up for the hubby or simply the world. But then again, we are simply copying the “feminist” way of American women.

I COMPLETELY agree with Desertfox. And I came to the conclusion that either the OP’s fiancée was really young and naïve, or she came from a very RURAL place, or… she’s playing the OP, because if they met through a website, then she must know something about something. I do not believe that any women in this day and age, does not know that women abort unwanted children (that made me REALLY suspicious). It’s true, Latin American women might be better “house broken”, but again, it’s just part of the culture.

Will she change?? Like someone posted already. I sure hope she does. No one should be used to feed an ego; no one should be used to make another one feel big and powerful.

Just my two cents… and we should close this account. 

If you think it should die, why bump the damn thing with your .02??

[Anyta Holland 1]

I tried and tried… and I really think this thread should die… (just like Romeo)…

I will have to stand on materialistic side of this. And coming from Venezuela, I have to say that the way that Camila and Danielle have expressed, is the way our mothers were brought up, and the way they brought us up too. I believe (and I’ve seen this in my own mother), that women in my country (and probably in most Latin American countries are taught that we have to “serve” our men (meaning, father, brother, cousins or husband). And in my Mom’s generation, I’ve seen many women just “putting up” with a whole bunch of ####### because they did not have the means to get out of a relationship and support a family on their own. It’s different now though. I believe that women now in Latin America are more prepared and independent, and they work, and their kids are in daycare, and then they still find time to get all dolled up for the hubby or simply the world. But then again, we are simply copying the “feminist” way of American women.

I COMPLETELY agree with Desertfox. And I came to the conclusion that either the OP’s fiancée was really young and naïve, or she came from a very RURAL place, or… she’s playing the OP, because if they met through a website, then she must know something about something. I do not believe that any women in this day and age, does not know that women abort unwanted children (that made me REALLY suspicious). It’s true, Latin American women might be better “house broken”, but again, it’s just part of the culture.

Will she change?? Like someone posted already. I sure hope she does. No one should be used to feed an ego; no one should be used to make another one feel big and powerful.

Just my two cents… and we should close this account. 

If you think it should die, why bump the damn thing with your .02??

I think Ana was just trying to get her point across and explain what she has said in the past and that was probably misinterpreted... I have not followed this thread in full as I thought it was a bit lame from day 1, although good fun as I was bored...

But it has created such a big fuss that I too think it should be left as it is... Seems to me that people are trying to convince others of what is right or not, and how things should be or shouldn't... The fact of the matter is, that everyone is entitled to their own opinions and that probably they won't change as these convictions are embedded in what they are as a person... Also, these convictions or behaviours have been passed from generation to generation... And so, again, have build each person's characters...

But that is just my humble opinion...

Edited May 19, 2006 by anytaholland

[Sweetgirl 0]

Would be a shame if she had her own mind once coming/getting to the states.

Does Dr. J Stand for JACKASS?

INDEPENDENT FEMINIST" woman that alot of American women have become?? I just don't want that negative influence to come into my wife's mind.

MAN....I think EVERYONE here misunderstood me. Sounds like mostly women responding...and if so then I guess what I thought was right......BUT........I was only asking if people have wives that are the same when they met as they are now. MOST American men know how ALOT of AMERICAN women are........don't even have to go into explaining that #######. I guess the men scared to speak up..........Guess I got my answer. Some of us went to other countries to find wives........now ask yourself why bring a woman from another country into the United States if there are SOOO MANY GOOD WOMEN HERE??????

My goodness...not even 5 mins after I posted......get HATE MAIL......no one understands anymore......

There are a lots of beautiful women in Europe,especially in Russia,Northern and Eastern Europe!., but American men are the most beautiful and sweet in the world!

Also the mixed blood marriages provide a beautiful kids .

Most of the European women got a good genetic

Take care!

Would be a shame if she had her own mind once coming/getting to the states.

Does Dr. J Stand for JACKASS?

INDEPENDENT FEMINIST" woman that alot of American women have become?? I just don't want that negative influence to come into my wife's mind.

MAN....I think EVERYONE here misunderstood me. Sounds like mostly women responding...and if so then I guess what I thought was right......BUT........I was only asking if people have wives that are the same when they met as they are now. MOST American men know how ALOT of AMERICAN women are........don't even have to go into explaining that #######. I guess the men scared to speak up..........Guess I got my answer. Some of us went to other countries to find wives........now ask yourself why bring a woman from another country into the United States if there are SOOO MANY GOOD WOMEN HERE??????

My goodness...not even 5 mins after I posted......get HATE MAIL......no one understands anymore......

The american women don;t realize that they should be happy that they have a such a nice men around ,but they probably dont realize it

I love you guys ,i mean guys!., but of course i love my husband first

Sincerely.

There are a lots of beautiful women in Europe,especially in Russia,Northern and Eastern Europe!., but American men are the most beautiful and sweet in the world!

Also the mixed blood marriages provide a beautiful kids .

Most of the European women got a good genetic

Take care!

[workin4somethin 0]

My fiance, Areilys, will be coming to the US soon. I have received notice from the USCIS that they have sent the papers to the NVC on April 20, 2006.....hopefully she will get the papers soon. I just wanted to know how many people have women from Colombia or some spanish country...ACTUALLY ANY country and brought them here for marriage and have been married. Have you noticed a change in their attitudes? How do they deal with the FEMINIST culture here? Has anyone wife changed for the worst and become the much hated "INDEPENDENT FEMINIST" woman that alot of American women have become?? I just don't want that negative influence to come into my wife's mind. How have your marriage experiences been with your foreign wives??

Dr. J,

I think you have asked some good questions, as I have read stories in other forums on this topic. Evidently, there are some foreign fiancés who enter the USA with a vulnerability to what some men see as a negative influence, regarding the independent feminist attitude that is sometimes found within our culture. In fact, I just read a story about a woman from South America, who came to the USA on a fiancé visa. Her sponsor had the view that she was settled into a mindset that included his idea of the perfect woman. She arrived in the USA, and he was in heaven, at first. Then about 60 days later, he couldn’t understand what had happened to his angel. She countered his ideas on most topics with ideas of her own. It appeared to him that she had changed in a negative way, and he attributes such to our culture.

I think there have been some good exchanges in this thread, and there have been some that are not helpful at all. It is too bad that some members feel they must write a critique of the author’s original post and query, instead of trying to be helpful. I also think that you may find “more” educated and experienced answers to your queries in forums where most of the writers have completed the initial entry processes into the USA. I have seen some books on the I-net that include similar topics, which you may want to research.

My foreign wife is Russian. I do not expect her to change her beliefs or her character after living in the USA. I hope that you and Areilys find a life together in which you, both, learn to give and take, where love and trust help create the closest of ties.

[jelti 0]

O.M.G.

Guys, I seriously just read this ENTIRE POST in one day. Go ahead. Quiz me. I dare you.

Shows how much work I do at work.

And to add something real to the post:

I'm an American woman. I do not consider myself feminist, but I do hold the belief that both men and women equally deserve respect and opportunity to love and live as they choose. I want to be spoiled, pampered, adored, loved, and respected. I want to spoil, pamper, adore, love, and respect my husband. I love cooking, but don't do so often because I'm working full-time supporting my husband who can't work yet because he doesn't have an EAD. He, therefore, cooks for me and washes the dishes and even does the laundry (and is mighty fine at it, I might add )! One day, he's going to own his own business and I'm going to quit my job to become a stay-at-home mama who takes care of the babies, cooks, cleans, and also co-manages my husband's business, and he's going to come home to a happy wife and wonderful babies.

There were so many differing opinions on this thread, it's amazing to see the diversity! I, for one, loved the entire thread. I found it so interesting to watch people's minds work and post with such passion.

You're searching for a wife with traditional values who comes from a different country because you don't believe that there are any left in your home country? Wonderful! Good for you! Respect and love her for who she is and embrace the changes that she'll go through in life, whether they be small or life-changingly large. But do not judge the women who have worked hard to give their offspring the freedom to choose. It's not wise to insult the wisdom of the ancestors.

You're an American woman and proud of the fact that you supported your family on your sole income, and damn pissed that someone has the balls to come on here saying that you're exactly the type of person they're trying to avoid? Good for you, you have every right to be pissed off. You took care of your family, worked your butt off to give your children a better life, what right does someone have to judge you for those decisions? But you must also realize that everyone in the world will never agree with you 100% of the time. If they did, the world would be a very boring place!

Cohabitate, friends. People are unique. Love them for who they are, or at least give them the same respect you wish them to give you.

Edited May 22, 2006 by jelti

[almaty 19]

let it die