Does the whole world need to Know????

[awaterlily 0]

well said!

This is just a random rant, but as i am reading the guides in preparation for filing the K-1, I notice that it is stated that you must get a letter from your employer, confirming your employment. Also notarized statements (?..i think) regarding assets and debt. What bothers me about the whole thing, is that you have to essentially involve all these random people in your personal business, just to get the things you need. Personally, i work in an office full of busy body gossiping hags ( to put it kindly, dont get me wrong they are not all bad...) i can only guess that once i ask the HR person for a letter of employment verification for Immigration, that within a matter of time, it will spread to the other offices. Now i love my SO with all my heart and will have no problem, telling someone off, but the whole process seems so invasive. Im certain other VJ'ers have had personal experience with this. Often times, we are already dealing with the skepticism and criticism of family members and friends, when we state our intentions to be with someone from another country ( the smart comments and wisecracks) and then you have to go and involve your employer in your personal business as well. That really sucks!!!!! anyone care to comment?????

[Jenn! 918]

I agree.

We didn't submit any affidavits from friends/family for our I-751 simply because I find it embarrassing to even ask. If we get RFE'd then so be it, and I'll bite the bullet, but I just don't think it's appropriate.

[Jenn! 918]

And if they ask what it's for. Say it's for the office of NUNYA ..... nunya damn business!

Withholding information in a tactful manner is important. Getting in HR's face with an unnecessarily rude/testy response to a perfectly human question is not the best way to ensure ones job security.

JMHO.

I think she was being facetious.

[Sinergy 3]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

[Jenn! 918]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

Just to be clear, I don't think getting a letter of employment for immigration is embarrassing. I think it's embarrassing to ask your friends and family to write a letter stating that your relationship is genuine.

That's just how I am. Not saying everyone should be embarrassed by that.

Edited June 6, 2008 by Jenn!

[*JG* 2]

I was going to say the same thing Sinergy. I shout it from the rooftops if anyone asks. I just educated a friend of mine today on why we have to file for lifting of conditions. She is just another person who thought once your SO is here, it's all over and done with. I use every opportunity to educate.

I don't see what is embarrassing or the need to be kept secretive. It's a part of my life, just like anything else.

[Unruly Gal 0]

And if they ask what it's for. Say it's for the office of NUNYA ..... nunya damn business!

Withholding information in a tactful manner is important. Getting in HR's face with an unnecessarily rude/testy response to a perfectly human question is not the best way to ensure ones job security.

JMHO.

I'm sure Honeychild will be as tactful as she needs to be and handle the entire matter with the right amount of grace, professionalism and assertiveness that is warrented for the situation. As certain as I know Honeychild got my joke.

No worries there

[Sinergy 3]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

Just to be clear, I don't think getting a letter of employment for immigration is embarrassing. I think it's embarrassing to ask your friends and family to write a letter stating that your relationship is genuine.

Oh i know! But why your friends and family would be embarassing then? They are the ones who truely understand, and its a favor to help you with the ignorance of USCIS, again, to me nothing embarassing there. Not saying anything against anyone feeling embarassed by it, just saying i dont get why there should be embarassment.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

And if they ask what it's for. Say it's for the office of NUNYA ..... nunya damn business!

Withholding information in a tactful manner is important. Getting in HR's face with an unnecessarily rude/testy response to a perfectly human question is not the best way to ensure ones job security.

JMHO.

I'm sure Honeychild will be as tactful as she needs to be and handle the entire matter with the right amount of grace, professionalism and assertiveness that is warrented for the situation. As certain as I know Honeychild got my joke.

No worries there

My apologies.

[Sister Fracas 5]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

I was kind of thinking the same thing. I've generally found people interested and amazed at the process and hoops we go through. I didn't feel embarassed either to ask my parents or a family friend to write affidavits. They were only too happy to do it, you know, like they were playing a role in this whole process, and a way of showing support. If I feel "violated" by any "body", that would be the government, but then again, they know everything about me anyway... *shrug*

Edited June 6, 2008 by Sister Fracas

[Sinergy 3]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

I was kind of thinking the same thing. I've generally found people interested and amazed at the process and hoops we go through. If I feel "violated" by any "body", that would be the government, but then again, they know everything about me anyway... *shrug*

You are absolutly right

[000 0]

The only thing I hate about people knowing about my immigration needs is the fact they always try to talk down about my wife with things like " are you sure she doesnt just want a green card, you have to watch those woman you meet on the internet, why didnt you just marry an american woman" etc. I had no problem asking my HR director for employment letters and so on because since she is also a notary she helped me get my documents together so that I could be married in Brazil in the first place, but i do hate the people that have nothing better to do other than gossip and talk bad about the way others choose to live their life. I am well aware that so many people in my job call me loser, say I bought my wife off of a mail order bride website and other just plain rude and stupid things. Some people are just so sad they have nothing better to do.

[Jenn! 918]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

Just to be clear, I don't think getting a letter of employment for immigration is embarrassing. I think it's embarrassing to ask your friends and family to write a letter stating that your relationship is genuine.

Oh i know! But why your friends and family would be embarassing then? They are the ones who truely understand, and its a favor to help you with the ignorance of USCIS, again, to me nothing embarassing there. Not saying anything against anyone feeling embarassed by it, just saying i dont get why there should be embarassment.

I don't know what to say except that's just how I am. The fact that it is even an issue up for debate or speculation is embarrassing, to me.

Some people are embarrassed to speak in public, maybe this is my "thing".

Edited June 6, 2008 by Jenn!

[Sinergy 3]

i dunno, but to me why would it be embarassing? I didnt need to get a letter of employment, but i wouldve gladly asked and told the truth why i needed it. Immigration reasons or immigration itsself doesnt make me embarassed. I was just someone petitioning to have my hubby with me, bc i fell inlove with someone who isnt a citizen or already here.

Nothing embarassing in that.

Just to be clear, I don't think getting a letter of employment for immigration is embarrassing. I think it's embarrassing to ask your friends and family to write a letter stating that your relationship is genuine.

Oh i know! But why your friends and family would be embarassing then? They are the ones who truely understand, and its a favor to help you with the ignorance of USCIS, again, to me nothing embarassing there. Not saying anything against anyone feeling embarassed by it, just saying i dont get why there should be embarassment.

I don't know what to say except that's just how I am. The fact that it is even an issue up for debate or speculation is embarrassing, to me.

Some people are embarrassed to speak in public, maybe this is my "thing".

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

In mid-2006, a senior manager who was superficially familiar with INS procedures made the off-hand remark to me that I would not quit no matter what working conditions were like because it might impact my Affidavit of Support. I told him as long as I had another job and had sufficient income, it wouldn't be an issue.

At the time, I thought the issue was at rest. In December 2006, I learned I would get a $2,000 cut to my annual salary. In January 2007, I left.

Sometimes, when people know things, they abuse it.

Edited June 6, 2008 by VJ Troll