Curious MENA question...

[Alhamdulillah 0]

They don't catch heck like Muslim women who marry Christian or Jewish men do, and rarely are called out to justify it.

I've noticed that too and it's wrong but I think this stems from ignorance. Most muslims are aware of the fact that muslim women aren't allowed to marry non-muslim men but it seems like many muslims aren't aware that a muslim man is only allowed to marry chaste Christian or Jewish women and not those that are non-practicing or non-believers in general (other than ppl of the book).

[Alhamdulillah 0]

I'm especially curious about practicing Muslim men marrying agnostic, atheist or secular Christian and Jewish women. They don't catch heck like Muslim women who marry Christian or Jewish men do, and rarely are called out to justify it.

In the Muslim culture it is believed that the man is the decision maker on the childrens religion. This is why is it ok for men to marry out of his religion but it is harder to accept from women being ... it is believed that the man is the decision maker in the childs religion

This is why they discourage woman from marrying out of their religion

It's only acceptable (religiously) for him to marry outside of the faith if he's marrying a chaste Christian or Jewish women.... other non-muslims are not allowed for him to marry and he would be considered a fornicator for having a sexual relationship with her if she was other than muslim or a chaste Christian or Jewess since this marriage isn't valid in Islam.

[geenee 0]

Thanks It was a pretty darn stressful few days when they came to realization that he no longer practices. But his doubts started back in university and have steadily waned since. Essentially we both did not marry outside of our religions because we don't ascribe to such. It only was an issue during that trip. At this point - it's a nonissue

That's true. And that would be another part to my question if it applied-- how his/her family deals with him/her not practicing. Sounds like your inlaws took it in stride, about as well as any family tends to take this sort of thing, MENA, American, or wherever they are from.

They just deal with it... It is his or her choice. Some may not deal with it too well but such is life

[SaadBell 0]

Well I am a person who question the whole God thing, my family refuses to label me atheist or agnostic, gives them the creeps I guess. I am more of what you call a free thinker, I just happen to rely on science. I studied religion in college, and I find it very interesting, but all religions think they have the right answer. Most of the religions have a violent past, not so much love. I don’t know the answer, wish I did, but I am open to most experiences. Too many holes, too much blind faith, after living a while on this earth, makes one start to wonder, what is wrong with this picture. What makes me crazy is when religion is used as an excuse for murder. Religion has a lot of violence in its past, all the people put to death because they had a different idea than the norm. The sad thing is will humans ever evolve to where we can just find peace with one another.

[geenee 0]

I'm especially curious about practicing Muslim men marrying agnostic, atheist or secular Christian and Jewish women. They don't catch heck like Muslim women who marry Christian or Jewish men do, and rarely are called out to justify it.

In the Muslim culture it is believed that the man is the decision maker on the childrens religion. This is why is it ok for men to marry out of his religion but it is harder to accept from women being ... it is believed that the man is the decision maker in the childs religion

This is why they discourage woman from marrying out of their religion

It's only acceptable (religiously) for him to marry outside of the faith if he's marrying a chaste Christian or Jewish women.... other non-muslims are not allowed for him to marry and he would be considered a fornicator for having a sexual relationship with her if she was other than muslim or a chaste Christian or Jewess since this marriage isn't valid in Islam.

Islam is also very patient and understanding... Only God can truly be the judge of what is acceptable and not. Discouraged is a better word

[Sofiyya 1,687]

I'm especially curious about practicing Muslim men marrying agnostic, atheist or secular Christian and Jewish women. They don't catch heck like Muslim women who marry Christian or Jewish men do, and rarely are called out to justify it.

In the Muslim culture it is believed that the man is the decision maker on the childrens religion. This is why is it ok for men to marry out of his religion but it is harder to accept from women being ... it is believed that the man is the decision maker in the childs religion

This is why they discourage woman from marrying out of their religion

It's not Muslim culture that fosters that belief, it's jahilyya culture. According to the Quran, the Sunnah of Allah, everyone's religion is decided by Allah, not on the basis of gender. Also, the piety of a Muslim is considered on the basis of their practice and devotion, not on the basis of their gender. It is absolutely possible for the mother to be a better Muslim and more suited to passing on the faith than the father. All things are possibel with Allah.

Also, Allah has not forbidden Muslim women from marriage with men of the Book. Since Islam is His Message, we need to be careful to draw the distinction betwen what is disallowed by Muslims, and, therefore, open to debate, and what is disallowed by the Message from Allah.

No Muslim is allowed to marry polytheists, agnostics or atheists, and those that do are committing haram. Not my call; it's in the Book.

[Nasturtium 500]

Well I am a person who question the whole God thing, my family refuses to label me atheist or agnostic, gives them the creeps I guess. I am more of what you call a free thinker, I just happen to rely on science. I studied religion in college, and I find it very interesting, but all religions think they have the right answer. Most of the religions have a violent past, not so much love. I don’t know the answer, wish I did, but I am open to most experiences. Too many holes, too much blind faith, after living a while on this earth, makes one start to wonder, what is wrong with this picture. What makes me crazy is when religion is used as an excuse for murder. Religion has a lot of violence in its past, all the people put to death because they had a different idea than the norm. The sad thing is will humans ever evolve to where we can just find peace with one another.

Hi GG,

So does your husband's family know how you feel about religion?

[Alhamdulillah 0]

I am more of what you call a free thinker

And us religious folk are a bunch of lug heads?

Scientists can be, and frequently are, wrong!

Islam is also very patient and understanding... Only God can truly be the judge of what is acceptable and not. Discouraged is a better word

No, the Quran is quite clear that only chaste women from the ppl of the book are halal for muslim men to marry (other than muslim women of course).

[geenee 0]

Well I am a person who question the whole God thing, my family refuses to label me atheist or agnostic, gives them the creeps I guess. I am more of what you call a free thinker, I just happen to rely on science. I studied religion in college, and I find it very interesting, but all religions think they have the right answer. Most of the religions have a violent past, not so much love. I don’t know the answer, wish I did, but I am open to most experiences. Too many holes, too much blind faith, after living a while on this earth, makes one start to wonder, what is wrong with this picture. What makes me crazy is when religion is used as an excuse for murder. Religion has a lot of violence in its past, all the people put to death because they had a different idea than the norm. The sad thing is will humans ever evolve to where we can just find peace with one another.

Well ganga girl you have a great point but not only to religions have a dark past but humans in general. We can blame alot of it on religion but not all of it. It is animal nature. Science has its voilence too. There is violence in everything.... like animals for example. We cant control their instinct. But maybe one day the human will learn maybe not until the last day.... who knows. We just gotta do our best to help each other out.

[Nagishkaw 510]

I'm especially curious about practicing Muslim men marrying agnostic, atheist or secular Christian and Jewish women. They don't catch heck like Muslim women who marry Christian or Jewish men do, and rarely are called out to justify it.

In the Muslim culture it is believed that the man is the decision maker on the childrens religion. This is why is it ok for men to marry out of his religion but it is harder to accept from women being ... it is believed that the man is the decision maker in the childs religion

This is why they discourage woman from marrying out of their religion

It's not Muslim culture that fosters that belief, it's jahilyya culture. According to the Quran, the Sunnah of Allah, everyone's religion is decided by Allah, not on the basis of gender. Also, the piety of a Muslim is considered on the basis of their practice and devotion, not on the basis of their gender. It is absolutely possible for the mother to be a better Muslim and more suited to passing on the faith than the father. All things are possibel with Allah.

Also, Allah has not forbidden Muslim women from marriage with men of the Book. Since Islam is His Message, we need to be careful to draw the distinction betwen what is disallowed by Muslims, and, therefore, open to debate, and what is disallowed by the Message from Allah.

No Muslim is allowed to marry polytheists, agnostics or atheists, and those that do are committing haram. Not my call; it's in the Book.

Thank you for that great answer that you explained so well, VW! That really clears up so much of what I had wondered.

[SaadBell 0]

NO I never meant anything negative about being a free thinker, what I do mean is I ask a lot of questions, that is all. Of course science is wrong, but we also admit to the fact, and go back and re-draw the plans. Do you ever ask yourself why so much misery in the world? Why a baby dies in her mother's arms, or a young father is shot in an arm robbery and leaves a wife and kids? Why so much hurt and hardship? Just things I wonder about, and this is nothing to say you have your faith and for that I am very happy for you.

[SaadBell 0]

Truly someone's belief should always be respect and private. It is between that person and their God, and it should stay that way. To claim that my husband is somehow going to die a fiery death in the bowels of hell is a little insulting and really does not help the cause for religion or God. How do you feel about separation of church and State?

[Alhamdulillah 0]

NO I never meant anything negative about being a free thinker, what I do mean is I ask a lot of questions, that is all. Of course science is wrong, but we also admit to the fact, and go back and re-draw the plans. Do you ever ask yourself why so much misery in the world? Why a baby dies in her mother's arms, or a young father is shot in an arm robbery and leaves a wife and kids? Why so much hurt and hardship? Just things I wonder about, and this is nothing to say you have your faith and for that I am very happy for you.

I'm not against science GG, in fact, my faith encourages it but I don't rely more on science than what the Creator has told us. One is flawed while the other is not. I'm not saying the men who interpret God's laws aren't flawed, they obviously are since they're humans too.

Imam Ash-Shafi'i said: I believe my opinion to be the truth, while entertaining the possibility that it is wrong.

I have asked myself these questions you posed but I found all the answers in the Quran.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

Islam is also very patient and understanding... Only God can truly be the judge of what is acceptable and not. Discouraged is a better word

Islam is patient and understanding, but also expects discipline and obedience in the Word. Allah has judged, and He didn't leave us in the dark regarding what religious characteristics are and are not acceptable for a Muslim's mate. He allowed interfaith marriage; in other words, marriage between two faiths, not one faith and one without appropriate faith. He is very clear about that, and also commands Muslims to enjoin the good and discourage the bad inorder to remind our brothers and sisters how to stay in His Path.

[Alhamdulillah 0]

To claim that my husband is somehow going to die a fiery death in the bowels of hell is a little insulting and really does not help the cause for religion or God. How do you feel about separation of church and State?

I'm not the one who sends ppl to hell and I never said your husband is going anywhere. I don't make such statements. I just said the majority ruling is that it's considered zina (fornication) to marry a non-believer (other than chaste ppl of the book).

I am against the serparation of religion and the govt.