Muslims

[~Jackie~ 30]

Alhamdu lil lahi Rabbil Alameen

[doodlebugg 10]

Thank you Staashi. I reread some PM's and this thread and I am sitting at my desk with tears running down my face and I am sure everybody here at work thinks I am probably losing my mind or something terrible has happened to me. My tears are from joy and thankfullness for all of the kind words for myself and my family. Yes, now I know that I can along beside Ayman raise Malek in our faith. This I am grateful for and have suffered with the what ifs for quite some time now if I wasn't strong in my faith either it be Christian or Muslim and how would I be a light in my son's life.

Thank you again for your kindess everyone!

Have you thought about what you'll do with your other children? That was a hard one for me, though thank God it's working out nicely so far. I basically just tried to lead by example and they know they can ask me any questions anytime they want. I don't believe in forcing them to convert just because it happens to be my particular path but I do things like subscribe to Muslim Girl and leave it around on the coffee table, tell them I won't give them any Eid presents if they don't at least try to fast 1/2 days during that time, leave prayer times on the fridge so they are accustomed to when it's time for me to pray, keep the athan on the computer so they're used to hearing the sound of it, etc.

So far they've been pretty good though my wearing hijab was a big hurdle for them. They're quite used to it now and have actually shunned a kid or two who has made fun of it and their friends have stood up for them in the process. They no longer look for those short shorts in Abercrombie and now tend to wear bermuda shorts and go for the one piece bathing suits which is cool and that's without any influence from me at all. ( i never bought the short shorts btw for them but they used to beg for them for some reason).

In the end I think if I just present myself as a power of example of what Islam is really like then they can in turn make their choice when they are old enough. They have had a Catholic upbringing from birth until a few years ago, they went to a Congregational church when I went through an anti-Catholic phase after finding out a friend of mine was abused by a priest in Boston, and they actually go to a jewish camp, so I think all in all they're pretty well rounded religiously. The biggest part is that they believe in one God and they ask Him for help before tests, doing homework, etc. and that's all I can really ask for right now.

[Aymsgirl 0]

Yes Bridget I have thought about this. One of the reasons why I waited so long to convert was because of issues I had with my two older children. They have been raised Missionary Baptist since birth and their father as much of a hipocrite as he seems was very adamant about their upbringing. Before my husband came he made me promise to never bring them to a mosque or any Islamic event. With that being said, I am the one that has custody of my children and he is the visiting parent twice a month so if we go to an event at the Islamic Society and they want to participate I will welcome them with open arms. Sorry ex husband but you no longer rule my world!

They have witnessed their step father praying and do his Islamic duties but never me. I have not yet discussed my change of religion with them nor anybody except fellow Muslim friends and my spouse. As one of the girls stated to me, you don't have to wear a sign around your neck at first and this has helped me to realize I can ease myself into this. Not that I am ashamed so please nobody take offense, its just that I want to avoid huge problems with my ex's family, friends and others.

I will lead by example for them just as you Bridget when the time is right. Right now I want to focus on growing in my faith and learning as much as possible before my feet are put under the fire by speculating others. If my children want to learn, I am here. I will not force my beliefs on them like their father does. They will learn the correct way and it is by choice only.

[Tunisia216 2]

You have it just right.... Easing into it is the # 1 thing... Not trying to run around learning everything at one time or changing your life over night. Taking one thing at a time, making it part of your life, over days, weeks, months and for some things even years - Until you have mastered that and moving onto something else. ( I know it might be a poor example but it's like trying to lose weight- If you just say okay tomorrow I am going to blah blah and blah you might not be as committed after a few days or you make those changes but in a few weeks you find yourself going back to your old habits.. It just has to go slow, with purpose and intent, but slow nonetheless and every step of the way you are going to be rewarded)

Allah made Islam easy, to be like breathing, but when you aren't raised in a MENA country or an Islamic household it can seem overwhelming if you try to change everything at one time and that is the last thing that you'd ever want... Relax and step by step! But I'm still suuuper proud of you hehe

I have similar issues with my ex husband, you are most definitely not alone on that one!! The things that come out of that man's mouth sometime shock me to the point of wondering how I ever married him in the first place..... I try to forgive myself for it daily

Yes Bridget I have thought about this. One of the reasons why I waited so long to convert was because of issues I had with my two older children. They have been raised Missionary Baptist since birth and their father as much of a hipocrite as he seems was very adamant about their upbringing. Before my husband came he made me promise to never bring them to a mosque or any Islamic event. With that being said, I am the one that has custody of my children and he is the visiting parent twice a month so if we go to an event at the Islamic Society and they want to participate I will welcome them with open arms. Sorry ex husband but you no longer rule my world!

They have witnessed their step father praying and do his Islamic duties but never me. I have not yet discussed my change of religion with them nor anybody except fellow Muslim friends and my spouse. As one of the girls stated to me, you don't have to wear a sign around your neck at first and this has helped me to realize I can ease myself into this. Not that I am ashamed so please nobody take offense, its just that I want to avoid huge problems with my ex's family, friends and others.

I will lead by example for them just as you Bridget when the time is right. Right now I want to focus on growing in my faith and learning as much as possible before my feet are put under the fire by speculating others. If my children want to learn, I am here. I will not force my beliefs on them like their father does. They will learn the correct way and it is by choice only.

[HLM 1]

Yes Allah states in the quran there is no compulsion in religion; i agree leading by example is the best way; be openminded to their question n let them choose their path n insha ALLAH they will be guided

[Nothing1234 2]

Tasha! I just read all the posts now! (where have I been!)

Alf mabrouk! I am so happy and truly you're blessed! As many have said here...take your time. Read, Ask Questions, Learn!! Take this at a pace that is most comfortable for you. I believe strongly that learning and growing at your own pace helps avoid falling back!

YAY TASHA {{HUGS}}

PM me when your free! We should try to chat...me, you and Melinda when you have time.

Thank you Staashi. I reread some PM's and this thread and I am sitting at my desk with tears running down my face and I am sure everybody here at work thinks I am probably losing my mind or something terrible has happened to me. My tears are from joy and thankfullness for all of the kind words for myself and my family. Yes, now I know that I can along beside Ayman raise Malek in our faith. This I am grateful for and have suffered with the what ifs for quite some time now if I wasn't strong in my faith either it be Christian or Muslim and how would I be a light in my son's life.

Thank you again for your kindess everyone!

[Henia 11]

It is really hard with children, but as everyone has stated everything comes with time and being a good example. Before I married my husband and came here ... we lived in the US (near a Muslim community) but still it was never "cool" to be Muslim (unless we went out to Lebanese resturants to eat) ...

My daughter's bio-father is an Arab and Muslim but never set a good example for any of his children. Yet he thought he was the Islamic police telling everyone else how to act .... so of course my daughter had never any example (other then me) to learn from. But elhamdullah my current husband is a man man who deals with children and is setting a very good example for my daughter!

Being with my husband and here in Algeria too, my daughter as come into her own ... when it comes to religion. She sets the prayer rugs, reminds everyone of the athan, looks throu and tries to read the Quran, has learned 2 surats so far and was the first one to say "I want to go to the masjid" LOL!

[Nothing1234 2]

Sweet

It is really hard with children, but as everyone has stated everything comes with time and being a good example. Before I married my husband and came here ... we lived in the US (near a Muslim community) but still it was never "cool" to be Muslim (unless we went out to Lebanese resturants to eat) ...

My daughter's bio-father is an Arab and Muslim but never set a good example for any of his children. Yet he thought he was the Islamic police telling everyone else how to act .... so of course my daughter had never any example (other then me) to learn from. But elhamdullah my current husband is a man man who deals with children and is setting a very good example for my daughter!

Being with my husband and here in Algeria too, my daughter as come into her own ... when it comes to religion. She sets the prayer rugs, reminds everyone of the athan, looks throu and tries to read the Quran, has learned 2 surats so far and was the first one to say "I want to go to the masjid" LOL!

[ARALB 0]

Very Interesting allof this!!! I went to Jordan to marry my muslim husband, I am a christian, and was subject to an extra security check upon returning to the US myself. I think everyone gets treated pretty equally, I suppose to a point tho my Hubby will face the slap in the face too-- we just have to keep hoping for the best, and go with the will of God all of us! I hope the best for you all, and wish we and our loved ones will soon be together where we all belong!

[RAKASA 0]

Tasha! I just read all the posts now! (where have I been!)

Alf mabrouk! I am so happy and truly you're blessed! As many have said here...take your time. Read, Ask Questions, Learn!! Take this at a pace that is most comfortable for you. I believe strongly that learning and growing at your own pace helps avoid falling back!

YAY TASHA {{HUGS}}

PM me when your free! We should try to chat...me, you and Melinda when you have time.

Hey, I want in on chat!!! Can I, can I? Please???

[Nothing1234 2]

Tasha! I just read all the posts now! (where have I been!)

Alf mabrouk! I am so happy and truly you're blessed! As many have said here...take your time. Read, Ask Questions, Learn!! Take this at a pace that is most comfortable for you. I believe strongly that learning and growing at your own pace helps avoid falling back!

YAY TASHA {{HUGS}}

PM me when your free! We should try to chat...me, you and Melinda when you have time.

Hey, I want in on chat!!! Can I, can I? Please???

I'd LOVE THAT! You still need to call me MISSY!

[RAKASA 0]

Tasha! I just read all the posts now! (where have I been!)

Alf mabrouk! I am so happy and truly you're blessed! As many have said here...take your time. Read, Ask Questions, Learn!! Take this at a pace that is most comfortable for you. I believe strongly that learning and growing at your own pace helps avoid falling back!

YAY TASHA {{HUGS}}

PM me when your free! We should try to chat...me, you and Melinda when you have time.

Hey, I want in on chat!!! Can I, can I? Please???

I'd LOVE THAT! You still need to call me MISSY!

ummm, yeah - you busy now? I have a break!

BTW, that scorpion was nasty to the max! blech!!!!!!!

[Nothing1234 2]

Tasha! I just read all the posts now! (where have I been!)

Alf mabrouk! I am so happy and truly you're blessed! As many have said here...take your time. Read, Ask Questions, Learn!! Take this at a pace that is most comfortable for you. I believe strongly that learning and growing at your own pace helps avoid falling back!

YAY TASHA {{HUGS}}

PM me when your free! We should try to chat...me, you and Melinda when you have time.

Hey, I want in on chat!!! Can I, can I? Please???

I'd LOVE THAT! You still need to call me MISSY!

ummm, yeah - you busy now? I have a break!

BTW, that scorpion was nasty to the max! blech!!!!!!!

Yes! I'm about to leave work now...call me!!

Yes, he's the nastiest EVER! I'm still creaped out.

[SterlingGirl 1]

I'm neither a Muslim nor am I marrying anyone from a MENA nation, but I just thought I'd ask - female USC's with Muslim MENA beneficiaries, what prompted you personally to convert to Islam? Was it truly a decision you made prior to meeting your mate, or was it to ensure that your mate would be marrying a Muslim woman, or was it because the faith truly appealed to you? And if the latter, what was it about the faith that convinced you to adopt it?

This is totally not a sarcastic or rude question, but one of genuine curiosity.

[~Jackie~ 30]

I really had never heard of Islam until after 9/11. I started to read about it and studied for 6 months. I knew of no muslims. I didn't know any arabs. I just knew I was searching for something with structure and found it in Islam.

After 6 months of preparing, I said my shahada May 5, 2002. A muslim woman can only marry a muslim man, so that narrowed my field greatly! lol.

It is always refreshing to see someone show interest.

Jackie