Muslims

[sara..... 371]

I have a question too.. To those who went from not covering...to covering:

I would LOVE to cover coz I really and truely believe it is a great way to find more of a sense of self rather than worrying about how my outward appearance is to others. I'm really worried though and even feel semi-embarrassed to start covering since the ppl I know have already seen me uncovered. Did anyone else feel an initial sense of embarassment or a feeling of it not seeming "right" when u started covering? I'm really having problems with this and could use some tips and stories from others on it. How did you all get thru the initial transition? How long did it take to feel comfortable?

Thanks

amal

i have a friend that went thru what ur going thru so finally i asked her are u covering for Allah? she answered yes so i said to her then what do u care what others think if indeed ur covering for Allah.......after she started to cover she told me that she felt so protected and really did not understand why she was worried about it to begin with so i guess maybe u have to also answer that question not for us but for urself

[amal 4]

thx..

it isn't just what others think of me.. honestly, when I've put it on..I not only feel embarassed but like I'm not being myself (if that makes sense). It just doesn't "feel" right and I almost feel silly. I am trying to figure out how to NOT feel that way.

[Alhamdulillah 0]

Here's a question hijabbies how many do you have??? just wondering what the "norm" is. . lol me??? last count (don't tell my husband) @40

Too many to count. My parents live in Saudi and every time I see my parents my mom brings like 10 or so for me. I would put my number at about 40-50, some which have yet to see the light of day

OMG u ladies are making me feel like a hijab monster I feel like the Carrie (sex in the city) of the muslimaat all of a sudden! (her shoe obsession)

I have three of those plastic three-draw towers (14X12X20) filled full of hijabs and some others that are just too big or thick to fit in there. And I still buy new ones when I have the money I don't wear them all.... I should give some away

[sara..... 371]

thx..

it isn't just what others think of me.. honestly, when I've put it on..I not only feel embarassed but like I'm not being myself (if that makes sense). It just doesn't "feel" right and I almost feel silly. I am trying to figure out how to NOT feel that way.

well this is all very new to u so of course it will feel odd at first it is expected really

do u have any support system in place? i mean other muslims that live around u........i think that sometimes deep inside of us if we dont have a support system in our life we feel the way ur describing it......also myself i have found that i have gone thru many different styles of the way i style my hijab........u can like go on line and look at different places that sell hijab and see the way that they style them........maybe its just u have not found the style that u feel comfortable with here is a site that i use when looking for different ways to wear them if u want u can just look around it to see what im talking about

http://www.411hijabs.com/

if there is ever anything i can do for u to help u with this plz let me know

sara

[Alhamdulillah 0]

thx..

it isn't just what others think of me.. honestly, when I've put it on..I not only feel embarassed but like I'm not being myself (if that makes sense). It just doesn't "feel" right and I almost feel silly. I am trying to figure out how to NOT feel that way.

You just get used to it to tell the truth. I used to feel the same way when I started covering and now I can't imagine going out with it. It becomes a part of u and u get comfortable with it over time.

[Zee Bee 61]

hehehe that's cute..i just love kids!

I have a question too.. To those who went from not covering...to covering:

I would LOVE to cover coz I really and truely believe it is a great way to find more of a sense of self rather than worrying about how my outward appearance is to others. I'm really worried though and even feel semi-embarrassed to start covering since the ppl I know have already seen me uncovered. Did anyone else feel an initial sense of embarassment or a feeling of it not seeming "right" when u started covering? I'm really having problems with this and could use some tips and stories from others on it. How did you all get thru the initial transition? How long did it take to feel comfortable?

Thanks

amal

I must say that the harshest critics were my parents. They were supportive but skeptical about it all.

I started covering before I went to college and my parents had all these fears that I would be teased, people would not take me seriously, I would have a hard time fitting in, etc. Honesly, I also felt the same way, but decided that it didn't matter because what I was doing was because of my belief in my faith and not what others thought.

After a while I forgot to care about what people thought...unless I was having a bad hijab day

A friend of mine in college decided she wanted to start wearing the hijab in junior year. One day she just came to class and there she was, all covered up. As far as I know, no one said anything to here. Some people asked questions about her decision and she said she was doing it because she wanted to. End of story. People accepted that and moved on.

[amal 4]

thx..

it isn't just what others think of me.. honestly, when I've put it on..I not only feel embarassed but like I'm not being myself (if that makes sense). It just doesn't "feel" right and I almost feel silly. I am trying to figure out how to NOT feel that way.

well this is all very new to u so of course it will feel odd at first it is expected really

do u have any support system in place? i mean other muslims that live around u........i think that sometimes deep inside of us if we dont have a support system in our life we feel the way ur describing it......also myself i have found that i have gone thru many different styles of the way i style my hijab........u can like go on line and look at different places that sell hijab and see the way that they style them........maybe its just u have not found the style that u feel comfortable with here is a site that i use when looking for different ways to wear them if u want u can just look around it to see what im talking about

http://www.411hijabs.com/

if there is ever anything i can do for u to help u with this plz let me know

sara

thx..

it isn't just what others think of me.. honestly, when I've put it on..I not only feel embarassed but like I'm not being myself (if that makes sense). It just doesn't "feel" right and I almost feel silly. I am trying to figure out how to NOT feel that way.

You just get used to it to tell the truth. I used to feel the same way when I started covering and now I can't imagine going out with it. It becomes a part of u and u get comfortable with it over time.

I really don't have much of a support system here. There are muslimas everywhere but I don't have any personal friends here *yet*. I feel that maybe if I had some close friends we hung out with a lot..maybe it would help me feel more comfortable coz I really badly want to wear it but just can't quite get there yet

Thanks both of u for ur honest answers. They are very much appreciated!

amal

[Alhamdulillah 0]

My daughter is 7 and she wears hijab to school Last year she wanted to wear it so I let her but then the kids started teasing her and telling her she looked like an old lady so I made her stop. Then this year she asked again before school started and I told her no but she kept insisting and insisting so I finally gave in. She wore it the whole year mashallah and no one bothered her about it other than asking why she wears it (and asking her brother why he doesn't ) We went to the zoo a few weeks ago and it was really hot so I told her to take it off. The hijab itself doesn't make her hot but her hair is wild and tries to escape from the hijab!! It comes out from every side and gets in her eyes and it's hard to push it back when it does that so I didn't want her wearing it outside when she'd be sweating and everything. All her teachers and kids were like "OMG she's so pretty!" and going on and on about it LOL one teacher actually said "Oh we've never seen her hair before" I was like yeah right because it comes out the sides and back and half the time is falling off anyway

I really don't have much of a support system here. There are muslimas everywhere but I don't have any personal friends here *yet*. I feel that maybe if I had some close friends we hung out with a lot..maybe it would help me feel more comfortable coz I really badly want to wear it but just can't quite get there yet

Thanks both of u for ur honest answers. They are very much appreciated!

amal

I'll be there soon inshallah

[sara..... 371]

My daughter is 7 and she wears hijab to school Last year she wanted to wear it so I let her but then the kids started teasing her and telling her she looked like an old lady so I made her stop. Then this year she asked again before school started and I told her no but she kept insisting and insisting so I finally gave in. She wore it the whole year mashallah and no one bothered her about it other than asking why she wears it (and asking her brother why he doesn't ) We went to the zoo a few weeks ago and it was really hot so I told her to take it off. The hijab itself doesn't make her hot but her hair is wild and tries to escape from the hijab!! It comes out from every side and gets in her eyes and it's hard to push it back when it does that so I didn't want her wearing it outside when she'd be sweating and everything. All her teachers and kids were like "OMG she's so pretty!" and going on and on about it LOL one teacher actually said "Oh we've never seen her hair before" I was like yeah right because it comes out the sides and back and half the time is falling off anyway

I really don't have much of a support system here. There are muslimas everywhere but I don't have any personal friends here *yet*. I feel that maybe if I had some close friends we hung out with a lot..maybe it would help me feel more comfortable coz I really badly want to wear it but just can't quite get there yet

Thanks both of u for ur honest answers. They are very much appreciated!

amal

I'll be there soon inshallah

ur sooo sooo lucky my smaller sisters are not allowed to cover their hair at school because the school says there is a no hat policy so they can not break that rule even for them so they have gotten permission to wear a shawl to cover their other parts we live in a very small town 600 people and we are the only muslim family here.........we even had to fight the school over not giving another type of food when they are serving pork for lunch or breakfast.........also had to battle the lunch assistant over them telling the girls and my brother that bacon bits are ok to eat cuz they are not real bacon......one day my mom got a call from the school that her children were refusing to eat lunch at the middle school and the grade school and only sitting their while everyone was eating so she went to the schools to see what the problem was and told them well ur trying to feed them pizza with sausage they can not eat it and would rather go with out food than put something in their body that is forbidden..........now they offer a second selection to my smaller sisters and brother when they will be serving pork..........

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

Thanks everybody for your support and offerings of assistance. It's nice to come to a place and ask questions like this and not feel judged for feeling confused.

Oh yes, Rajaa....let me tell you the story behind the screen name. I originally signed on with my name and my husband's name and was messing around and changed it trying to do something more simple well I didn't think about T and A being what we know as the abbreviation. I am stuck with it for so long, I think a year. It was quite embarassing for me at first! I will pm you because I was also raised in the Baptist religion!

i've always thought that whenever i see your screen name

[Alhamdulillah 0]

ur sooo sooo lucky my smaller sisters are not allowed to cover their hair at school because the school says there is a no hat policy so they can not break that rule even for them so they have gotten permission to wear a shawl to cover their other parts we live in a very small town 600 people and we are the only muslim family here.........we even had to fight the school over not giving another type of food when they are serving pork for lunch or breakfast.........also had to battle the lunch assistant over them telling the girls and my brother that bacon bits are ok to eat cuz they are not real bacon......one day my mom got a call from the school that her children were refusing to eat lunch at the middle school and the grade school and only sitting their while everyone was eating so she went to the schools to see what the problem was and told them well ur trying to feed them pizza with sausage they can not eat it and would rather go with out food than put something in their body that is forbidden..........now they offer a second selection to my smaller sisters and brother when they will be serving pork..........

Our school has a no hat rule as well but the constitution of the USA that forbids any establishment from infringing on the religious rights of its citizens tops any school rule

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances."

It really depends on how old the girls are whether I would want to make a big deal out of it. If they're in grade school / elementary, I personally wouldn't make a big deal out of it because they aren't really required to wear it before puberty but if her school has an issue with it in the future then I'd take it to the school board.

I take my kids out of school early every Friday as well because of the Jumua'ah and I had to send a note explaining and talk to someone from the school board about that and they didn't give me a problem after I explained that I'll worry about their opinions on Friday when they start making the Jewish and Christian children come to school on Saturdays and Sundays

They also offered to to give the children private time together to pray during the day and excuse them from any activities that I notified them as being forbidden in our religion. Neither one of my kids has to take music class or dance (if there's music) or anything like that and in art class they are never required to draw, paint or sculpt the image of a living creature. My son also was exempted from sex ed this year and we did a health unit on our own to replace the grade. I can't afford private school so I've had to learn how to manuever the system

They also offer vegetarian lunches daily at all the schools in the area but my kids take lunch from home.

Of course, we moved from the country to the city last year and there are a lot of muslims in this area so they're pretty used to it.

[sara..... 371]

we have fought this school so many times in the last few years..........so we kind of go along with what they dig their feet in.........but this coming year we are preparing to do battle with the school system over hijab and a few other things.......pray for us we are going to need it.......i went with my youngest sister yesterday on a field trip.....the kids accepted my hijab well but i can honestly say that the mothers of the children that went to chaperon as well started pulling kids out of the group i was chaperoning to be with them they didnt talk much to me so in the end it was just me and my little sister......we had a ball but the her teacher came up and apologized to us over the behavior of the other women it is not easy being Muslim but it is worth all of what we go thru

[Alhamdulillah 0]

we have fought this school so many times in the last few years..........so we kind of go along with what they dig their feet in.........but this coming year we are preparing to do battle with the school system over hijab and a few other things.......pray for us we are going to need it.......i went with my youngest sister yesterday on a field trip.....the kids accepted my hijab well but i can honestly say that the mothers of the children that went to chaperon as well started pulling kids out of the group i was chaperoning to be with them they didnt talk much to me so in the end it was just me and my little sister......we had a ball but the her teacher came up and apologized to us over the behavior of the other women it is not easy being Muslim but it is worth all of what we go thru

Ppl here are usually nice to me, for the most part but there are times when other parents act like they don't really want to talk to me or be around me.... that's OK though because, most likely, I don't want to talk to them or be around them either

[sara..... 371]

Ppl here are usually nice to me, for the most part but there are times when other parents act like they don't really want to talk to me or be around me.... that's OK though because, most likely, I don't want to talk to them or be around them either

yeah ur right about that.........the problem here is most are catholic and they know NOTHING about Islam other than what they read in the papers lol

[amal 4]

that is something that I don't know if I could handle. I dealt with being made fun of and being picked last when I was younger (all coz of curly RED hair and bucked teeth-which by the way str8ened themselves out perfectly all on their own as I got older). I don't think I have the strength to be picked at and ridiculed by ppl who don't educate themselves. lol i'm such a baby when I read that..but oh well..what I am is what I am and I can't change it lol