Muslims

[adam1 1]

The answer is so simple, if you choose not to wear hijab it is between you and Allah. You cant pick and choose and design Islam for your own satisfaction or western idealogy. I just got back from a nice day listening to Shiek Yusuf Estes here in Fresno. And he explained it so clearly , that is why I believe in it , I wear hijab. However I know many women who wear hijab and they are lacking other aspects of Islam in thier ways, I know many women who dont wear hijab but have a beautiful heart for Islam.

The dangerous thing is to be carefull in telling people what to do and not do. Because if you tell others you dont have to wear hijab and it turns out your wrong, your going to be held accountable for them. So its best to say its between you and Allah.

[Kenza 1]

I love Yusuf Estes! I enjoyed his speech here too in Sac. He is funny Hey one question for Adam and other MENA men....do you have a beard? no debate just wondering...My hubby does but it's short...he also inherited the unibrow which he said he'll fix before he gets here lol...

[Kenza 1]

here is a short inspiring clip for my hijabi sistas!

Ask the Muslim Women-suhaib webb

[HLM 1]

Very well said ladies and you are very welcome HLM. Like Kenza said let's find some other Islamic topics to discuss. How about something to do with our spouses? I am always looking for ways for my marriage to grow stronger and my faith to grow. Does anybody have any good Islamic sites to read for inspiration regarding a long lasting marriage?

I always look for how the prophet Mohammed treated his wives and how they treated him. It's very romantic and very inspiring...I can't find links for this now but I will definitly look for them and send them to you. There is soo much to learn from his sirah -his biograghy.

One thing I personally do is ask my husband to pray together if he can't go to the masjid..It makes me feel closer to him and you get this wonderful feeling in your heart of just simple satisfaction I would say.

I love Yusuf Estes! I enjoyed his speech here too in Sac. He is funny Hey one question for Adam and other MENA men....do you have a beard? no debate just wondering...My hubby does but it's short...he also inherited the unibrow which he said he'll fix before he gets here lol...

My husband has one short as well...

[childress_london 3]

I love Yusuf Estes! I enjoyed his speech here too in Sac. He is funny Hey one question for Adam and other MENA men....do you have a beard? no debate just wondering...My hubby does but it's short...he also inherited the unibrow which he said he'll fix before he gets here lol...

Noooo...why is he going to get rid of the unibrow? My hubby has one and I love it. :-)

[Kenza 1]

I love Yusuf Estes! I enjoyed his speech here too in Sac. He is funny Hey one question for Adam and other MENA men....do you have a beard? no debate just wondering...My hubby does but it's short...he also inherited the unibrow which he said he'll fix before he gets here lol...

Noooo...why is he going to get rid of the unibrow? My hubby has one and I love it. :-)

I don't know why I don't like it...maybe it's because where I grew up ( and where I still live) it is frowned upon and it is gross or ugly...my husband always says that in Morocco some guys want to have one..but I've convinced him to get rid of it...and you've seen my pics, it's a realllll unibrow lol

Edited April 12, 2009 by Kenza

[Der Bücherwurm 1]

Noooo...why is he going to get rid of the unibrow? My hubby has one and I love it. :-)

I like the plucked eyebrow look myself. Whenever I see a guy with a uni-brow I think they look like a cartoon bad guy.

But hey, if they keep the uni-brow then they are half-way to the Boris Badenov look come Halloween.

[pecaelover 0]

I'm in a total muslim slump. No praying, thinkin' about ditchin the hijab (please no debate about it), etc. No idea why just the way it's happened. *sigh*

I'm in the same boat stakfirallah but I would never ditch the hijab cause I feel naked outside without it...What makes it harder is that I have no support system and the masjid is 40 min away. May Allah SWT guide us again to the straight path and protect us from the ameen. It's also not good to openly discuss sin but i think it helps us come together to become stronger inchallah.

Well I think if HE knows then why is it bad for everyone else to know, you know? Plus it's a way for people to relate since I'm sure many go through it. Regarding hijab I'm just sick of it to be honest. The physical part that is. Maybe this is a natural phase too who knows. I'm in a pity party mood about it. I hate not being able to have a chic haircut anymore for all to see. I hate being different than everyone else. We do have 2 other hijabis in my building but to be honest they're both so rude imho. I've smiled and said salam to both and both would respond and then just look away like I'm some weirdo. Most of all I think because softball season has begun so I'll be attending like 2 to 3 games/week and there I feel like a massive spectacle.

My hesitation at first was that wearing it would put more attention on my self and that would be defeating what I thought the whole purpose was. What made me start wearing it was that I had this revelation that the true purpose was above what I am able to comprehend. I truly felt that and still do to a certain extent but my life is so very stressful now and that part of it is compounding the stress level for me lately. Oh and did I mention summer is coming and I dread it????

So much about no debate. I'm debating myself. lol

Why don't you start with being truly honest with yourself and God? I have read you state that after studying the issues you did NOT believe that women had to wear hijab. A SHORT WHILE LATER, YOU WERE YOU WEAR WEARING IT. The truth is that you wear it purely because of pressure from your husband. You are like many women here in that regard - weak and dependant on your husband's approval - not God's.

Everything you write screams that you are lying to yourself. Lying to your husband is the easy route, isn't it? Telling him the truth means that all HIS prejudices about women will come tumbling onto your head and you will have to deal with that. Stop trying so hard to adapt to his culture and let him see what is good about yours. You are not Egyptian... you are American and he lives here now. If you lived in Egypt, little provision would be made for you to adapt.

For the sake of your sanity and your marriage - get honest and tough now. If your husband can't love you as really are, deal with it. Of all the women on this board, I feel most alarmed by what you write. Listen to al the enablers on here, pretending to believe in Islam for the sake of a husband/lover... or get real with yourself and God. I think you do believe in God... but humor your ignorant husband by pretending to buy into the women-hating rot his type of Islam promotes.

I'm sorry, do I know you? Have I met you in person? Ever im'd you? You have no idea what and who I am. My husband was always honest with me about the fact that he didn't like that I didn't wear hijab. If that's forcing me then whatever. I still didn't wear it and he accepted it and told me that his younger sister only started wearing it herself and that his mom wore it just the last year of her life. Don't even begin to believe that you know what was in my heart when I put it on.

the night before I wore it I prayed Istkikhara and when I woke up I had a full and complete feeling that it was time. Lost of things led up to that decision but it was my decision and I still believe it is the right one. And as for suggesting my husband can't love me if I were to take it off, well that's just ridiculous. He even knows how I feel now about it and he just says "as you wish". Will he be disappointed? Of course! What husband wouldn't when he's lived with his wife for a year and she's been wearing it. You know nothing about our love and I resent the blatant accusations you're giving in here. Looks like you see someone weak who is going through a hard time with hijab and you are using that for your agenda. Whatever.

we have to know everyone in person before can comment on a forum???

Just my two cents worth but ur husband puts wrong pressure on u. ''As you wish'' is often used by Egyptians. u must know this isnt as nicely meant as it sounds. Did he also put pressure with his prefercencez on his mom and sister? If you are weak it is not fault of allah but personal fault in allowing husband to intimidate u into wearing hijab.

husband wouldn't when he's lived with his wife for a year and she's been wearing it?

Answering ur question: secure, loving, generous man would be happy for you to make ur own decision. Such man is not worthy of loving wife if he tries to control her. u are always so full of hate and anger when people try helping u ur loss

[UmmSqueakster 54]

Actually, Islam isn't for everyone. It isn't a universal truth, nor is it an actual truth. It is only true, if you believe it - like any faith. You are so brainwashed that you can't even recognise this opinion when you make such expansive statements. A huge percentage of people all over the world don't believe in any religion. These very same people usually respect your right to believe what you like.... but smug zealots like you don't afford the same courtesy to others - as your misguided idea of God doesn't permit that, does it?

First thought: big fat LOL!

Second Thought: I prefer the term FUNdamentalist to brainwashed smug zealot, thank you very much.

Third thought: Brainwashed? By whom? Certainly not by my husband, who practices a very different form of islam than I do.

Fourth thought: Umm yeah, muslims believe the Prophet Muhammad (saws) was the final messenger sent to bring Islam to the entire world. In our paradigm, it IS the universal truth. If people don't buy into that paradigm, no skin off my nose. And if believing in a single universal truth makes me a smug zealot, then it is a label I shall wear proudly.

Fifth thought: Enough thoughs wasted on you, I have better uses for my brain cell. kthxbye!

[ya falaha! 0]

Hahahaha @ "as you wish" or my other fave "do what you need".

I'm assuming that pecaelover is ahmeds girl...dunno if you meant it or not but you may want to message the admins to correct the spelling to peacelover.

I have to agree with the sentiment that a husband/fiance shouldn't place pressure on a woman to cover. It's one thing for him to prefer it but it's quite another for him to put the heat on. Ask yourselves this question...am I doing this because I believe it's something God wants or am I doing this to make the husband happy? Be honest with yourselves...completely honest. Honestly, I don't care why any of y'all cover. Just be honest with yourselves. Oh and other questions to ask yourself, am I doing it to "fit in" or fit a mold or play dress up or give off an impression? I really don't think those are good reasons either. Again, it's up to you but just be real honest with yourselves. Just a side note, my opinions are not meant to be attacks but instead food for thought. ETA: I'm not implying any of y'all are doing such nor am I thinking of any particular members.

Ok carry on...

Edited April 12, 2009 by Astarte

[Leyla 0]

Hahahaha @ "as you wish" or my other fave "do what you need".

My fav is: "As you like Leyla. As you like."

[ya falaha! 0]

LOL "as you like" is a good one, too.

In all honesty, those phrases p*ss me off. They're so passive aggressive. They do make me LOL though.

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

LOL "as you like" is a good one, too.

In all honesty, those phrases p*ss me off. They're so passive aggressive. They do make me LOL though.

yep! thats how it is here too... he will say the same thing and Im like either YES OR NO... or SOMETHING

I'll ask him where do u want to eat out at, and he will say As you like... well then I will give him what I like Atlanta Bread Co. or Golden Coral for variety... he says no no I dont like those.... ummm I asked you and you said as I like?!

those are as I like!

Edited April 12, 2009 by TamaraLovesAdam

[Leyla 0]

LOL "as you like" is a good one, too.

In all honesty, those phrases p*ss me off. They're so passive aggressive. They do make me LOL though.

It's just like "Inshaallah." (God Willing). I understand what it means but people use it too much. I'm like.... "Yeah but it won't happen unless you do something!"

The other day I said: "Call your boss to find out what your schedule will be" and Tarik said: "Inshaallah." I said: "No... InshaANTA. You need to pick up the phone and call, not God." lol

[ya falaha! 0]

I don't like "inshallah" being overused or basically used to shirk a responsibility. I do get irritated when I know "inshallah" means probably not. Many MENA ppl know full well that they never intend to do something but they'll say "inshallah" instead of "no". I hate that. So yeah if the husband says "inshallah" I'll be like, yes or no...not "inshallah". So he'll say yes, inshallah...lol.

LOL "as you like" is a good one, too.

In all honesty, those phrases p*ss me off. They're so passive aggressive. They do make me LOL though.

It's just like "Inshaallah." (God Willing). I understand what it means but people use it too much. I'm like.... "Yeah but it won't happen unless you do something!"

The other day I said: "Call your boss to find out what your schedule will be" and Tarik said: "Inshaallah." I said: "No... InshaANTA. You need to pick up the phone and call, not God." lol