christians and muslims

[mohamed and trina 0]

hi there folks i felt i wanted to post a question to all of you.now remember i am not putting anyone down just wanted to know the truth.because i know sometimes when i post alot of people come back with so mean comments.so take this to heart if you can.i have been engaged to a muslim man for almost 3 years now.i am christian and he is muslim.religion becomes kinda hard to us.because we believe in so many diffrent things.about jesus and everything else.well folks my question to you and please be honest.does a relationship between a muslim and a christian always work out.or does it just cause problems in the end.its kinda hard talking religion to someone when they think so much diffrent then you.and it always causes a fight in the end.i dont want a relationship like that.so friends i can use your support will it get better or harder.sometimes i think it wont work due to diffrent cultures.and it kinda scares me to loose the love of my life.but alot of people say it will be hard for it to work out with diffrent religions.so friends tell me how i can make it work just spend my life not talking religion or what.because i know there is alot of experianced women here who know what i am going through.

[william_wallace 8]

hi there folks i felt i wanted to post a question to all of you.now remember i am not putting anyone down just wanted to know the truth.because i know sometimes when i post alot of people come back with so mean comments.so take this to heart if you can.i have been engaged to a muslim man for almost 3 years now.i am christian and he is muslim.religion becomes kinda hard to us.because we believe in so many diffrent things.about jesus and everything else.well folks my question to you and please be honest.does a relationship between a muslim and a christian always work out.or does it just cause problems in the end.its kinda hard talking religion to someone when they think so much diffrent then you.and it always causes a fight in the end.i dont want a relationship like that.so friends i can use your support will it get better or harder.sometimes i think it wont work due to diffrent cultures.and it kinda scares me to loose the love of my life.but alot of people say it will be hard for it to work out with diffrent religions.so friends tell me how i can make it work just spend my life not talking religion or what.because i know there is alot of experianced women here who know what i am going through.

My ex wife has had a relationship with a muslim for 4 years. As far as I can gather they get on very well. They both agreed not to let religion interfere with there relationship and they get on wonders.

[Peikko 1,575]

I think you have answered your own question really. No relationship is guarenteed to work out, much less a relationship where fundamental beliefs are divergent no matter where the beliefs stem from. Relationships need some common ground and while being 'in love' is a common experience, it's not enough on its own to sustain a long term relationship.

[Not Available 0]

I'm not saying that this will be you, but I have been through this experience (me being christian). We were not married but I thought our relationship would be fine, after all it was just religion. Well the more serious it got, we started talking about marriage. He didn't want a Christian ceremony, I did. I wanted our kids to be raised Christian, he didn't. He wanted me to take part in his religious rituals, I didn't want to cause it wasn't what i believed in. With a bunch of other religious issues thrown in, we decided that it be better we went our separate ways. I think the biggest one being what the kids would be raised believing.

Anyway, not to scare you or anything, but its really hard. I'm sure there is a way to make it work, we just couldn't find a way.

Maybe this is why the bible says do not be "Unequally yolked"?

[Pinocchio Liberal 268]

I'm not saying that this will be you, but I have been through this experience (me being christian). We were not married but I thought our relationship would be fine, after all it was just religion. Well the more serious it got, we started talking about marriage. He didn't want a Christian ceremony, I did. I wanted our kids to be raised Christian, he didn't. He wanted me to take part in his religious rituals, I didn't want to cause it wasn't what i believed in. With a bunch of other religious issues thrown in, we decided that it be better we went our separate ways. I think the biggest one being what the kids would be raised believing.

Anyway, not to scare you or anything, but its really hard. I'm sure there is a way to make it work, we just couldn't find a way.

Maybe this is why the bible says do not be "Unequally yolked"?

Stina, Clean the house girl

[Not Available 0]

I'm not saying that this will be you, but I have been through this experience (me being christian). We were not married but I thought our relationship would be fine, after all it was just religion. Well the more serious it got, we started talking about marriage. He didn't want a Christian ceremony, I did. I wanted our kids to be raised Christian, he didn't. He wanted me to take part in his religious rituals, I didn't want to cause it wasn't what i believed in. With a bunch of other religious issues thrown in, we decided that it be better we went our separate ways. I think the biggest one being what the kids would be raised believing.

Anyway, not to scare you or anything, but its really hard. I'm sure there is a way to make it work, we just couldn't find a way.

Maybe this is why the bible says do not be "Unequally yolked"?

Stina, Clean the house girl

and that means what?

[Pinocchio Liberal 268]

I'm not saying that this will be you, but I have been through this experience (me being christian). We were not married but I thought our relationship would be fine, after all it was just religion. Well the more serious it got, we started talking about marriage. He didn't want a Christian ceremony, I did. I wanted our kids to be raised Christian, he didn't. He wanted me to take part in his religious rituals, I didn't want to cause it wasn't what i believed in. With a bunch of other religious issues thrown in, we decided that it be better we went our separate ways. I think the biggest one being what the kids would be raised believing.

Anyway, not to scare you or anything, but its really hard. I'm sure there is a way to make it work, we just couldn't find a way.

Maybe this is why the bible says do not be "Unequally yolked"?

Stina, Clean the house girl

and that means what?

Your signature girls room is horendous!

[Not Available 0]

ohhhh! lol

Yeah I'll get to it eventually

[AlHayatZween 2]

but alot of people say it will be hard for it to work out with diffrent religions.

Well, i think in the end, you can't listen to what other people say or think. You have to know what is best for you, your children, and what you are willing to compromise and agree upon.

That being said, it is always curious to me why Christians and Muslims see themselves as so far apart on the spectrum. Know your Bible well, and particularly the Old Testament, and read the Qur'an and you will find many more similarities than differences. The people and lessons are all the same. One grows from another. And remember that Jesus and Mary, peace be upon them, play important roles in the Qur'an as well. It is easy to find interconnections if you try.

i think it can work... but it will take patience and good communication and a willingness to listen.

But this is true for all relationships, no? Not just Christian and Muslim.

Good luck, m3 asalaama,

hz

[Heracles 417]

Stina, Clean the house girl

I know of a few girls who have been forced to basically be slaves after marrying an old-school Muslim guy. I warned this one girl in particular what her husband was like but she argued until she was blue in the face that I did not know him. I have muslim friends so I know what their dads are like. Surprise Surprise I find out approx 2 years later they are divorced. And I also found out, from her mum, that she was abused and forced to perform Muslim rituals.

I think western culture generally teaches us that we are all equal and good people but this tends to blind people and lead a lot of them, ignorantly, into trouble. It is hard for some people to understand that culturally we are not equal at all and many ethnicities have quite extreme beliefs.

If two people strongly believe in something different I just cannot see the relationship working. I think similar values are the foundation of a long term relationship.

Edited May 21, 2008 by Boo-Yah!

[mohamed and trina 0]

thank you all for you comments i am having a hard time sleeping up past my time to be asleep.so worried and nervoous with my fiance dont know what to do with this situation.esp when it comes to us planning to have children and me agreeing for them to be muslim.its going to be so hard for me to see them not agree with their mom on major religion issues.like with jesus,and believeing in 3 wifes and many many things our new issue was me and my mom we are christians some people like my fiance believe that when you go to hell that god can get you out.we believe that once you are in hell you made your choice when you was on earth that thats where you will be.see friends that what i am talking about things like that and us christians believe so strong that jesus is the son of God and it hurts me for some not to believe that.see where i am comming from friends will a relationship and a family with diffrent religions can that work.or will it be to hard.i need to settle down and calm down because one i dont want to loose him.another i really want our children to believe what i do or it will hurt me.and it will confuse and hurt them to learn both religions.but thank you so much for your comments and i will pray hard about this relationship before i go any further and then later down the raod be a divorce any advice how i can save this and how it will be fair to the both of us.its driving me insane.and the sad thing my mom is starting to be nervous for me.and we are the best of freinds we are all eachother has.i will try to sleep now i do need some comforting news.maybe God can show me the right way in how to handle this situation.God bless you all.and thank you.have a wonderful rest of the night.

[Nagishkaw 510]

As a Christian, you may ask yourself if your relationship with your SO is ordained by God. Secondly, you may ask yourself how is your relationship with God? You know that your worrying and nervousness comes from the deceiver. Keep praying and seeking God's will. Your attitude determines your accomplishments.

[Peikko 1,575]

I think she'd do better to make a list of all the things she believes her and her husband have serious discrepancies over and another list determining all the great things that make their relationship special and then considering if the problems overshadow the blessings.

Also, listing the 'problem' areas may well clarify whether these really are issues or simply fears that have grown out of proportion to reality.

Fundamental differences in belief systems are not easily overcome if indeed it is possible to do so, whereas cosmetic differences are easy to dismiss.

[sara535 15]

I beleive 100% that a marriage between a Christian and a Muslim can work and many many times does. It depends on the people involved. However, Trina, it sounds to me like you have some major issues with your fiance's faith and its critical to work them out now before there really are children in the picture. Its possible it cant be worked out. Good luck to you, I know this cant be easy but its better to face it head on now rather than later.

[sereia 0]

I know inter-faith relationships CAN work (and I know of some first hand)... but honestly, (and I'm sure I'll get sh*t for this...) if you care THAT much about your religion, why would you want someone who wasn't the same? Wouldn't you want that someone to go to church/mosque/synagogue/whatever WITH you? Wouldn't you want to celebrate the holidays together? To pray together? Wouldn't you want to raise your kids with religious beliefs you BOTH believe in?

If I was religious I wouldn't even THINK about dating someone who wasn't like-minded.

I wish you luck in working things out! Talk everything out before he gets here. Trust me!!!