Dealing with SO's opinions about future children

[sarahaziz 0]

I think following religion (exactly as printed in the books) is easier said than done lol

[Martiniolive 0]

In Christianity it is the same way as Islam (althought you would not know it because there are soooo many "hypa-christians) You are not supposed to DATE.....You are not supposed to be alone with the oposite sex either and all mingling is supposed to be in groups to avoid trouble. When a christian decides he or she is ready for marriage than they are to choose a suitable partner based on what they have found out about him/her and the perspective spouses family through the group get togethers. The get togethers could be church functions, school functions, family functions etc..... and i supposed even a family fix up would fall into that category too. At least that is the way it is supposed to be.....one thing I personally like about muslims faith is that people actually practice it! I really admire and love that!

[sarahaziz 0]

In Christianity it is the same way as Islam (althought you would not know it because there are soooo many "hypa-christians) You are not supposed to DATE.....You are not supposed to be alone with the oposite sex either and all mingling is supposed to be in groups to avoid trouble. When a christian decides he or she is ready for marriage than they are to choose a suitable partner based on what they have found out about him/her and the perspective spouses family through the group get togethers. The get togethers could be church functions, school functions, family functions etc..... and i supposed even a family fix up would fall into that category too. At least that is the way it is supposed to be.....one thing I personally like about muslims faith is that people actually practice it! I really admire and love that!

THANK YOU!! intelligent woman... I hate when people say oh your chrisitian aren't you allowed to date...####### it's nowhere written in the bible

[Ihavequestions 419]

In Christianity it is the same way as Islam (althought you would not know it because there are soooo many "hypa-christians) You are not supposed to DATE

Oh really?

This is news to me.

[Nasturtium 500]

In Christianity it is the same way as Islam (althought you would not know it because there are soooo many "hypa-christians) You are not supposed to DATE

Oh really?

This is news to me.

If you followed Biblical guidelines for marriage, this would be correct. Rebekah, Rachel and Leah would all be examples to follow. The problem aforementioned in other threads/earlier is what exactly is defined as dating. It's not against Biblical principle to get to know someone before you marry them, so then to some people that would be defined as dating, even if you were to always be chaperoned and never alone, etc., or like Ruth and Boaz.

[sarahaziz 0]

Culture is what has made people from Islamic countries think that Christians probably don't keep values. It's not true. That's personal decisions not a whole Religion as a whole.

[♥JP♥ 5]

Culture is what has made people from Islamic countries think that Christians probably don't keep values. It's not true. That's personal decisions not a whole Religion as a whole.

This is an incorrect statment. Christians living in Islamic countries do not date and Muslims know this and understand their values as they are very similar.

Western culture is more so what some Muslims are agains and the act of dating is included in that.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

My first husband was a Lebanese Christian. ME Christianity and ME Islam are closer in values then either are to western Christian and Muslim practice because the cultural influences on practice are so similar.

[morocco4ever 63]

This is really a subject that my husband and I disagree on. I think it is important to take the time to get to know each other, afterall that is what we did. Trust me, a year on the internet with nothing more to do than chat is a great way to get to know each other without "hands on" activity.

He of course is against dating assuming that it always leads to pre marital sex. And to give him credit, in most cases I believe he is right.

He believes, as probably most Muslims, that love will follow, but in my eyes I don't want to marry a man in hopes of falling in love. I don't fall that easy, so why would I want to be stuck with a man that could potentially be all wrong for me, or me for him?

No agreements here, but we agree to disagree.

[Ban Hammer 13,334]

This is really a subject that my husband and I disagree on. I think it is important to take the time to get to know each other, afterall that is what we did. Trust me, a year on the internet with nothing more to do than chat is a great way to get to know each other without "hands on" activity.

i'll agree with that

[♥JP♥ 5]

My first husband was a Lebanese Christian. ME Christianity and ME Islam are closer in values then either are to western Christian and Muslim practice because the cultural influences on practice are so similar.

Very well said

[Ovaltine Jenkins 5]

All your objectiveness will never erase the cultural reality or double standards that are held within this particular community. They highly value female virginity and integrity. Boys can do what they want and girls can't.

All this (to me at least) is so sick and twistminded Boys can go around the neighbourhood and rape anyone they wish without ever being blamed for it or judged or accused or sent to prison Instead, "people" grab the victim girl, throw stones at her, sentence her to death or whatever. How about beating all the sick boys to death so someone realizes they are the attackers and the bad ones? These issues seriously makes me sick. No offence to anyone but I just wouldn´t be able to love someone who is willing to beat his sister up, break her nose and leave her bleeding, blue and purple or whatever. I couldn´t even ever respect such a person. These things are so wrong Just my opinion.

[sarahaziz 0]

Culture is what has made people from Islamic countries think that Christians probably don't keep values. It's not true. That's personal decisions not a whole Religion as a whole.

This is an incorrect statment. Christians living in Islamic countries do not date and Muslims know this and understand their values as they are very similar.

Western culture is more so what some Muslims are agains and the act of dating is included in that.

I forgot to put Western Culture at the beginning of the sentence. Virtual Wife pointed it out correctly

[sarahaziz 0]

All your objectiveness will never erase the cultural reality or double standards that are held within this particular community. They highly value female virginity and integrity. Boys can do what they want and girls can't.

All this (to me at least) is so sick and twistminded Boys can go around the neighbourhood and rape anyone they wish without ever being blamed for it or judged or accused or sent to prison Instead, "people" grab the victim girl, throw stones at her, sentence her to death or whatever. How about beating all the sick boys to death so someone realizes they are the attackers and the bad ones? These issues seriously makes me sick. No offence to anyone but I just wouldn´t be able to love someone who is willing to beat his sister up, break her nose and leave her bleeding, blue and purple or whatever. I couldn´t even ever respect such a person. These things are so wrong Just my opinion.

Yeah those kind of men should just die for thinking they can play God and put anyone to death. But that's not how majority of men from there are like. Alot of women on this board can back that up because abuse isn't tolerated in USA so I doubt anyone would marry someone thinking they'd get beat up. There are some of those bad apples though who do beat on wives and sisters because of respect was broken. Usually happens in poor areas where respect is what can't be bought off with.

[morocco4ever 63]

All your objectiveness will never erase the cultural reality or double standards that are held within this particular community. They highly value female virginity and integrity. Boys can do what they want and girls can't.

All this (to me at least) is so sick and twistminded Boys can go around the neighbourhood and rape anyone they wish without ever being blamed for it or judged or accused or sent to prison Instead, "people" grab the victim girl, throw stones at her, sentence her to death or whatever. How about beating all the sick boys to death so someone realizes they are the attackers and the bad ones? These issues seriously makes me sick. No offence to anyone but I just wouldn´t be able to love someone who is willing to beat his sister up, break her nose and leave her bleeding, blue and purple or whatever. I couldn´t even ever respect such a person. These things are so wrong Just my opinion.

Just because it happens doesn't mean it is accepted by all people, it's not. Nor is it acceptable in Islam to have this double standard. The men are not suppose to have sexual activities outside of marriage any more than a woman is allowed.

Not just that, you can't tell me that these things don't happen here in the US. Unfortunately they do.

I have no problem respecting my husband, he believes in what Islam teaches. He may not be perfect, but he is a pretty good man IMO.