MOVE to IRAQ AND APPLY FOR VSC

[Amastar 0]

Are you saying that spouses of soldiers should get special treatment? I'm failing to grasp the nature of the gripe.

All I know is this : My husband is at work now and after work he'll return to his very comfortable home and have a full meal and nobody will shoot near him or in any way threaten the lives of his family. I very much want him to be with me but I'm not going to begrudge someone who is getting out of a hellish situation that perhaps, just perhaps, the US government feels somewhat responsible for creating.

Also consider that many have the option of leaving the US to be with our spouses if this process does not meet with our satisfaction. (I don't right now because of a blemish in my background, but in time I will.)

I hate this process. I hate what Vermont is up to. But on this issue, I give them a pass.

You want to know if I think spouse of soldiers should get special treatment ? .... Personally and I know a lot would agree with me .... YES!

Our lives are very different to civillian lifestyles .... you're lucky in the fact you always know that your Husband will be in his comfortable home with a full meal and nobody will shoot near him .... whereas we can be separated from our Husbands without a moments notice sometimes and not even know where they are or whether we'll ever see them alive again.

There's a few on this website in that exact situation ..... yet they have had to wait weeks and some of them months to see if their expedites will be processed.

There is a reason why Military Spouses have their own day .... and the President thanks us (supposedly) ...... we have a difficult lifestyle, which doesn't end when this visa process is over .... Army and Marines now deploy for 15 months!!!!

That's 15 months of not knowing if your Husband will come back dead in a bag .... alive or possibly with no arms or legs .... I doubt you have those conversations with your Husband at night on the webcam .... the conversations where you have to discuss what could happen in the future.

No, you probably talk about the fact it's a shame you can't live under the same roof .... whereas a lot of military spouses are discussing how we'll cope if when the next time we see our Husbands we have to feed them and wipe their backsides.

None of us choose the person we fall in love with .... and unlike you, we don't have the option of simply moving countries .... our Husbands belong to the US Government and we have no choice but to go through this silly process in a hope we can support them face to face instead of occassional calls on a SAT-Phone.

Damn Sarah...

I really never thought about what you have to go through until now. Everything you just said is so right!

You have so much more to worry about and stress about. I seriously got a lump in my throat when reading this. Jesus, I hope you get approved soon and I hope your husband comes back safe everytime.

[Army_Wife 2]

Since we have a voluntary military, it goes along with the job. Service was elected, not imposed.

I am grateful for the job that they do, but they chose to do that job.

And to some extent, you do choose who you fall in love with. You weigh everything and you make a decision. Again, it was elected, not imposed.

Voluntary Miltary? ok .... I guess you're not taking into account that when you sign those citizenship papers you also agree to the fact that if the US runs out of soldiers, you may get drafted in a war ..... that is not a choice!

Well, just to let you know ..... there's a lot of them dying, and not enough signing up ..... I'm sure your face will be a picture if your Husband got drafted.

If you think the US did not start this war .... then you must think that the destruction of the twin towers was acceptable ?

Choice in love?? if you have even the slightest ability to weigh choices to be with someone, that is not love .... that's convenience.

[shrewdgal 0]

I just figured out what was so special about 2/24/08

That was the last day VSC did real work around the office.

oh snap. ahhahahahahahaha i know, right..... since then...NOTHING

[MsZ 6]

But we do not have a draft. So your argument is nice but irrelevent.

And what does the twin towers and who started the war have anything to do with anything?

These are deflections and smoke screens.

Further, you darn well do make choices in love. Because you love someone does not mean that you marry them. Abusive situations come to mind. But there are many, many others.

We live with the choices we've made. You've made yours and I've made mine. But we've most certainly made them.

[000 0]

Are you saying that spouses of soldiers should get special treatment? I'm failing to grasp the nature of the gripe.

All I know is this : My husband is at work now and after work he'll return to his very comfortable home and have a full meal and nobody will shoot near him or in any way threaten the lives of his family. I very much want him to be with me but I'm not going to begrudge someone who is getting out of a hellish situation that perhaps, just perhaps, the US government feels somewhat responsible for creating.

Also consider that many have the option of leaving the US to be with our spouses if this process does not meet with our satisfaction. (I don't right now because of a blemish in my background, but in time I will.)

I hate this process. I hate what Vermont is up to. But on this issue, I give them a pass.

You want to know if I think spouse of soldiers should get special treatment ? .... Personally and I know a lot would agree with me .... YES!

Our lives are very different to civillian lifestyles .... you're lucky in the fact you always know that your Husband will be in his comfortable home with a full meal and nobody will shoot near him .... whereas we can be separated from our Husbands without a moments notice sometimes and not even know where they are or whether we'll ever see them alive again.

There's a few on this website in that exact situation ..... yet they have had to wait weeks and some of them months to see if their expedites will be processed.

There is a reason why Military Spouses have their own day .... and the President thanks us (supposedly) ...... we have a difficult lifestyle, which doesn't end when this visa process is over .... Army and Marines now deploy for 15 months!!!!

That's 15 months of not knowing if your Husband will come back dead in a bag .... alive or possibly with no arms or legs .... I doubt you have those conversations with your Husband at night on the webcam .... the conversations where you have to discuss what could happen in the future.

No, you probably talk about the fact it's a shame you can't live under the same roof .... whereas a lot of military spouses are discussing how we'll cope if when the next time we see our Husbands we have to feed them and wipe their backsides.

None of us choose the person we fall in love with .... and unlike you, we don't have the option of simply moving countries .... our Husbands belong to the US Government and we have no choice but to go through this silly process in a hope we can support them face to face instead of occassional calls on a SAT-Phone.

I understand what you are saying and I do feel for you and what you have to go through. At the same time as a spouse of someone in the service you understand that it was your spouses choice to have their life that way. As awful as it sounds it is true, I didnt have my father in my life until he retired from the military. And he didnt have a desk job or even a post in the USA. Nope, he was in the Special forces doing things that only he and his team will know about. In his years of service for the most part his life was on the line everyday, I only got to see him for 1 week every 2 years. Thing is he did not have to stay in the military that long, it was his choice, as it is the choice of all people in the armed forces right now. Do I think that their should be special treatment for their job? No. There is no draft in place right now, no one is forcing anybody to do anything. The people in our armed forces are doing the same thing that the people in the department of defense are doing, protecting our country. The military is a career choice just like any other job, and like any other job you start at the bottom and work your way up, thats how most of the people in the department of defense got their job. You have missed some time with your husband and as I said I feel for what you are going through, but I know I dont expect any type of special treatment just because I never had my father in my life because he was doing his job. The only thing I ever got from my father being in the military and dedicating his life to the military was really good health care until i was 18 years old. I am not in anyway saying that what the people in our armed forces do for is a small thing or not a big deal, but I am saying it as their choice, the life of a military spouse is a difficult one but just because your spouse took a job that was dangerous and involved a lot of traveling does not mean that there should be any special treatment. Depending on how you look at things though the spouse will always have special treatment , just not for everything in life.

[Ilya R. 0]

But we do not have a draft. So your argument is nice but irrelevent.

And what does the twin towers and who started the war have anything to do with anything?

These are deflections and smoke screens.

Further, you darn well do make choices in love. Because you love someone does not mean that you marry them. Abusive situations come to mind. But there are many, many others.

We live with the choices we've made. You've made yours and I've made mine. But we've most certainly made them.

We do, thats the most inconsiderate ####### I've even heard. Are you going to tell me that a firefighter that may one day save your childs life shouldnt get special treatment just because he volunteered to do so?

[MsZ 6]

Again, another false argument.

These evoke emotion but they defy logic.

[Ilya R. 0]

Again, another false argument.

These evoke emotion but they defy logic.

Last time I checked US goverment didnt run on logic.

[Army_Wife 2]

Nice comments there about no draft in place .... we'll see.

Like I said, there's a lot of boys dying and not enough signing up

Give this situation a couple of years and it could all look quite different ... it's amazing what changes a goverment can bring in overnight.

[MsZ 6]

And neither do a lot of people. Another bit of truth that is irrelevant.

[Army_Wife 2]

Again, another false argument.

These evoke emotion but they defy logic.

Didn't think you'd heard of the word emotion ..... thinking people can choose who they fall in love with after weighing up the options.

[000 0]

Soldiers make big sacrifices, and for that they should receive special treatment.

They get it, they really do, while some struggle to get a house loan a military person is 100% guaranteed a 250,000 home loan no questions asked. Free health care, free housing (even with their family, I couldnt tell you how many friends I have that married a woman only to get a bigger house and a bigger paycheck), tax free, and government shopping, cheap food, clothes (name brand too) CDs , DVDs , free education (sometimes they pay you to go to school as well as your school) you name it and all tax free. The people in our military are well taken care of. I am happy that we do take care of our military but to say that they deserve special treatment for everything in their life is something I cant do. I support our military, my whole family is in the military and most of my good friends are, I pray for them everyday, but I understand it was their choice, it is the life they wanted, they are happy doing what they do, except for the first timers, they had no idea what they were getting into , but for those that reenlisted knew that the military life was for them.

Edited May 13, 2008 by Guest

[Catt 6]

Since we have a voluntary military, it goes along with the job. Service was elected, not imposed.

I am grateful for the job that they do, but they chose to do that job.

And to some extent, you do choose who you fall in love with. You weigh everything and you make a decision. Again, it was elected, not imposed.

Frankly, all kidding aside, I agree with Sarah, at least in these years where deployements are so frequent.

Active service members are now usually deployed every other year or so for tours of duty of 12 to 15 months, to Iraq or Afghanistan, which is not an easy thing (albeit indeed part of the job).

The way I see it, in that year when they are at home, between missions, they should at least be able to have some peace of mind, and have a chance to spend that time with their family and not be stuck in visa hell.

I just do not understand this whole expedite for military deployment reasoning either... when soldiers have their orders (and they know they'll be leaving soon), then spouses get an expedite... only to be in the US with their husbands/wives are deployed. However, soldiers that return from battle have no expedite, in the year they are at home. Why not?

In our case, i'm not blaming anyone. We timed it badly and really wanted to get married here. We also figured K-1 ad K-3 wasn't so different timewise (it didn't see to be in the beginning of last summer).

Now I would never go around asking for special treatment for myself, as a military spouse or in any other capacity. I just fell completely in love with Mike (which was a heart thing). His job is part of him, and I accept and admire that. It does make this being apart now a bit more tricky, since we know that we won't have that much time, once i'm in the US, before he gets deployed again.

And MsZ, you're right about military personnel choosing the job they do and when you marry a military guy, it's part of the deal.

But then again, THEY DO choose it and they accept the deployments along with that. So in general and as a principle, I personally think the least the government could do, as I wrote before, is allow these soldiers to spend time with the people they love in the meantime, instead of being stuck in visa hell.

Would that really be special treatment? Or rather consideration for the difficult job they do?

[MsZ 6]

You know, even if they invoked the draft tomorrow, it still doesn't change the fact that your husband volunteered for the armed services.

[Army_Wife 2]

But we do not have a draft. So your argument is nice but irrelevent.

And what does the twin towers and who started the war have anything to do with anything?

These are deflections and smoke screens.

Further, you darn well do make choices in love. Because you love someone does not mean that you marry them. Abusive situations come to mind. But there are many, many others.

We live with the choices we've made. You've made yours and I've made mine. But we've most certainly made them.

We do, thats the most inconsiderate ####### I've even heard. Are you going to tell me that a firefighter that may one day save your childs life shouldnt get special treatment just because he volunteered to do so?

Ilya, ovbiously not ..... I guess those that 'volunteer' to help people aren't worth anything .... and if the firefighter died saving her child, it would be no big deal as MsZ thinks it would be ok as the firefighter volunteered to do so.