MENA WOMEN: What kind of jobs are your husbands doing/looking into?

[morocco4ever 63]

I wouldn't really know what language they speak in Morocco if I didn't look it up. French and arabic would come to mind but I wouldn't really blame people for not knowing that. I am sure many intelligent people wouldn't know how many languages are spoken in India. I don't know certain languages spoken in African countries...people know more about what they are interested in.

Though one thing that I used to get asked was if India was in the middle east. Now, that is a dumb question if you ask me.

Our lawyer in Morocco came once to New York and tried to get into it here. He said it was not easy at all. He eventually gave up and went back to Morocco. I think the problem he had was the language.

I feel really bad for immigrants that come from a highly educated back ground. They get here and pretty much have to start at ground zero. It's not easy.

I agree some might have to start all over. But not all. My husband got a job in his field right away(computer programmer/systems analyst). It really matters what field. He happens to be in a very in demand/good paying field. So I guess it matters where you move to and what you do.

Did you husband know english before he came? I think that is a huge part of it.

The company I work for has a huge amount of employees from India, as well as an office in India. They are highly intelligent, and many specialize in computers. The ones I work with on a regular basis know english very well, but have such a strong accent, talk fast, and have learned the pronunciations differently, that I have no idea what they are saying.

Funny story, I am in accounting and they were talking about what I thought was depostion. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what a depostion has to do with accounting. It took forever before I realized he meant depreciation. lol

Yeah he knew English before he came and doesn't have a really thick accent IMO. But he has a boss that is from India and has a much thicker accent but he has a good job too.

Don't almost all the people moving over know English? Unless the couple talks in a different language together(like Jenn has said in the past in her case). But if they don't, and the man doesn't know English, how are they talking? I can understand if they aren't strong at English but I'd hope they know it somewhat.

I think we have varying degrees of english comprehension. I can think of one poster in particular on VJ...lol

My husband didn't have any formal training in english. When we first met he really struggled. He is advanced now just from talking on a daily basis. I know he doesn't feel comfortable filling out forms because he is afraid he will misunderstand a question. I am not sure if this would be different if he had formal schooling in english.

Edited April 23, 2008 by morocco4ever

[honeyblonde 0]

Simple Male, discrimination may be illegal, but it happens constantly here in the deep south where we live. I saw it for years against myself as a woman, and my husband sees it as a non-Muslim Arab man. He's been asked to his face if he's a terrorist, if he talks to Bin Laden, been called Bin Laden by supervisors, etc.....

Now that he's unemployed he doesn't even get calls for interviews in spite of a great work history. They just have to see his name for his resume to end up in the trash apparently.

My economics professor made a comment last week in our Labor Economics course that was about like what you were saying. He seems to think that if something is illegal it won't happen very often. That isn't the case. Laws can't change what is in someones heart and mind, no matter how hard we wish they would. People rarely risk sueing for discrimination because it will get a person black-listed for life and nobody wants to be out of work forever (well, some people do, but not the majority.) I put up with sexual harrassment daily for over two years because I was supporting two kids and had no choice and I know many people who do the same.

On the note of knowledge of Morocco - when we send money to his family we've been asked what state Morocco is in even though we put it in the County field on the form. When Abdel tells his co-workers that it is in Africa, they say "Hey, you're our brother man!" That has actually helped him form friendships at work before. Some people seem surprised that there are white people in Africa and think he's lying. He has to explain to them that North Africa is mostly Arab. I have to admit that I knew very little about Africa or Arabs or lots of things before I met an Arab man. The people he meets who know much about Morocco and Africa are usually the older guys at work who were over there during a war or whose fathers were there. We have a lot of retired military down here who are big into US history especially of the wars, so they have studied up on it and love to talk to him about North Africa.

[Jenn! 918]

Yeah, I guess you can't expect your average Joe to know much about North Africa.

I just thought with 911 and the "War on Terror" etc., that more people would have an awareness of the region.

Just the other day I got Bhutan and Benin confused and had to have my 10-year-old sister correct me.

[♥JP♥ 5]

Now that he's unemployed he doesn't even get calls for interviews in spite of a great work history. They just have to see his name for his resume to end up in the trash apparently.

My economics professor made a comment last week in our Labor Economics course that was about like what you were saying. He seems to think that if something is illegal it won't happen very often. That isn't the case. Laws can't change what is in someones heart and mind, no matter how hard we wish they would. People rarely risk sueing for discrimination because it will get a person black-listed for life and nobody wants to be out of work forever (well, some people do, but not the majority.) I put up with sexual harrassment daily for over two years because I was supporting two kids and had no choice and I know many people who do the same.

Discrimination is also very hard to prove. If he wasn't hired based on his religion or background the company won't site that as the reason why. They will most likely say that there were other candidates more qualified than he was. It's hard to know what the reasons why someone isn't getting a call back for employment unless you are in the company itself.

I'm currently looking to hire someone in my department and I have recieved over 200 resumes. It would be very easy for any candidate to say that I didn't call them back due to their race, religion, name, etc. Howevr they don't know how qualified other candidates are that apply. In the end, I can only hire 1 person for the job but regardless of who I select that doesn't mean that I am discriminating against the others that applied. I'll also add that not all hiring managers will review all the resumes they get. Like I said, I got 200 and if I find a good candidate by the time I get through 50 resumes then I will call them in for an interview. I guess what I am trying to say is dont be so quick to say he is being discriminated against because you don't know the reasons for someone elses actions.

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

JP....Ill move to cali and u can hire me....

[♥JP♥ 5]

JP....Ill move to cali and u can hire me....

whoo hoo! done! You might be ready to come back from maternity leave when I get ready to take mine

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

lol....FMLA covers my ####### for 12 weeks, but the bank only wants to pay me for 6 of them, so saadly, i will go back 6 weeks after zaid is born....these past 2 weeks ive been using PTO....boooo i need more benefits...lol

[♥JP♥ 5]

lol....FMLA covers my ####### for 12 weeks, but the bank only wants to pay me for 6 of them, so saadly, i will go back 6 weeks after zaid is born....these past 2 weeks ive been using PTO....boooo i need more benefits...lol

Im not sure that is right. The HR dept here told me that I will get short term disability for 6 weeks but if my doctor thinks I need more of a recovery time, they will extend my disability. FMLA just covers your job for 12 weeks so they can't fire you, lay you off, or change your position. I'm not sure what the laws are in Illinois but you might want to look into that.

[Jenn! 918]

lol....FMLA covers my ####### for 12 weeks, but the bank only wants to pay me for 6 of them, so saadly, i will go back 6 weeks after zaid is born....these past 2 weeks ive been using PTO....boooo i need more benefits...lol

Im not sure that is right. The HR dept here told me that I will get short term disability for 6 weeks but if my doctor thinks I need more of a recovery time, they will extend my disability. FMLA just covers your job for 12 weeks so they can't fire you, lay you off, or change your position. I'm not sure what the laws are in Illinois but you might want to look into that.

My company also only gives 6 weeks of PTO after delivery (8 weeks for C-section). I *think* that's pretty standard.

ETA: I think 6 weeks sucks btw. You should see the laws on maternity leave they have in Italy. Something like 75% pay for 2 years, I can't remember precisely, but it'd almost be worth moving back there just for the maternity benefits.

Edited April 23, 2008 by Jenn!

[ya falaha! 0]

We have the same policy here.

Im not sure that is right. The HR dept here told me that I will get short term disability for 6 weeks but if my doctor thinks I need more of a recovery time, they will extend my disability. FMLA just covers your job for 12 weeks so they can't fire you, lay you off, or change your position. I'm not sure what the laws are in Illinois but you might want to look into that.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

What do you mean save up for applications? Where is your Husband applying and why do they charge $1,000-$2,000 to interview him? I don't understand.

Waleed's Sister finished her masters in cardiology recently and is moving on to her Ph.D. which they are coming back to the US to finish. Her Husband just finished his Ph.D. with a fellowship in Orthopedic Surgery at John Hopkin's in Baltimore. I kind of have my hopes that when his sister comes back for her Ph.D. fellowship/internship where ever she chooses that Waleed may have some in's. Also I worked at a hospital for 8 years and I know literally hundreds of doctors in my region. Plus my older brother has a franchise in a medical software business that installed software into private doctors offices all over the country so there are loads of connections there too. He often tells me where they are hiring and for which kind of position and speaks to the doctors who have made the transition to here from other countries for tips to help Waleed's transition.

But I am so curious what do you mean about these high costs of the applications? Is this the region where you are living? Did your Husband finally have success?

wow...98 is great. she will be able to get a residency pretty much anywhere. well i guess it depends on how long she has been out of school. alot of places concider that also. another reason why my husband had such a hard time getting in. imagine that...he practiced medicine in saudi arabia for almost 10 years and his experience didnt help at all. they want new doctors not old ones. some of the programs dont want u to be out of college for over 2-3 years and some 5 years.

oh yeah...start saving up money for those applications too. they are not cheap!!! we spent $1,000 the first year and got noooo interviews so the next year we spent $2,000 and the only interview he got was at the hospital here and only cuz he went there and begged and wouldnt stop begging until they interviewed him.

also prepare yourself for they only hire once a year. so if u dont make it the first time u have to wait a whole year before applying again and with their education no one is going to hire them. my husband applied many places and didnt get called...why would they hire someone who is going to quit as soon as they get a job in their profession anyway?

Edited April 23, 2008 by Olivia*

[simple_male 1]

lol....FMLA covers my ####### for 12 weeks, but the bank only wants to pay me for 6 of them, so saadly, i will go back 6 weeks after zaid is born....these past 2 weeks ive been using PTO....boooo i need more benefits...lol

Im not sure that is right. The HR dept here told me that I will get short term disability for 6 weeks but if my doctor thinks I need more of a recovery time, they will extend my disability. FMLA just covers your job for 12 weeks so they can't fire you, lay you off, or change your position. I'm not sure what the laws are in Illinois but you might want to look into that.

My company also only gives 6 weeks of PTO after delivery (8 weeks for C-section). I *think* that's pretty standard.

ETA: I think 6 weeks sucks btw. You should see the laws on maternity leave they have in Italy. Something like 75% pay for 2 years, I can't remember precisely, but it'd almost be worth moving back there just for the maternity benefits.

Even in Canada, the offer many month's PTO. One of my friends has become a father recently. Even he is getting many month's PTO now.

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

JP...its exactly the same benefits im getting....6 weeks PTO....8 if i was to have a csection....and i could take 12 weeks off under FMLA...

[♥JP♥ 5]

JP...its exactly the same benefits im getting....6 weeks PTO....8 if i was to have a csection....and i could take 12 weeks off under FMLA...

Right but I think if your doctor decides you need more than 6 or 8 weeks due to medical reasons, you will get that time paid as well.

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

JP...its exactly the same benefits im getting....6 weeks PTO....8 if i was to have a csection....and i could take 12 weeks off under FMLA...

Right but I think if your doctor decides you need more than 6 or 8 weeks due to medical reasons, you will get that time paid as well.

That determination is made based on your company's disability benefits. It doesn't have anything to do with the law. Some companies don't pay for anything, they just hold your job for you.