marriage between muslim women and non muslim men . HALAL or Haram

[aisha kandisha 0]

there are few things more obnoxious than people who think their personal experiences are reflective of the rest of the world. if someone wishes to only speak of what they saw, it should be preceded by a "i'm only relating what i've seen or experienced" instead of a broad, demeaning generalization.

Just out of curiosity here, do you disagree that IN GENERAL most MENA countries are somewhat male-centric? I capitalize the in general because I do realize that there are always exceptions....

I think in general most countries are male-centric, including very much our own. I think how this manifests itself is the difference.

[morocco4ever 63]

I believe especiall like these two that they see themselves as the big rulers, american women are basically a little more self sufficient, most have been married, divorced have had to keep the home and the kids going. Our men will come here, most will have to wait to work and basically dependent on us for awhile, i just see some coming here all gunho to do this and that and it dont work like this.

I know of a few that come here and the couples argue, the first thing out of the guys mouth is OH NO ONE EVER TALK TO ME LIKE THAT BEFORE...or IF WE WERE BACK IN MOROCCO YOU WOULD NEVER .....at their homes they are just used to being spoiled and catered to by the mothers and sisters

My husband has said that before in the heat of an argument, lol. He said most of the women don't argue back. My husband also knows that the majority of men their are spoiled by the wives, mothers, and sisters. He was one of them as well.

I guess all men can be broken like a horse and trained. Throughout history mothers have been the ones to teach faith and religion in families. If the mother isn't strong in her faith the children most likely will not be either.

We are trying to break and train our husbands...like a horse? Me thinks that your wife must stay home and do all of the house work while you sit on your A$$.

What is wrong with a man helping around the house considering that we, the woman, that should be chained to the stove, work to help with the support? This isn't something that I broke and trained in my husband, this is something that is a mutual agreement.

Edited April 21, 2008 by morocco4ever

[sandinista! 1,816]

there are few things more obnoxious than people who think their personal experiences are reflective of the rest of the world. if someone wishes to only speak of what they saw, it should be preceded by a "i'm only relating what i've seen or experienced" instead of a broad, demeaning generalization.

Just out of curiosity here, do you disagree that IN GENERAL most MENA countries are somewhat male-centric? I capitalize the in general because I do realize that there are always exceptions....

I think in general most countries are male-centric, including very much our own. I think how this manifests itself is the difference.

indeed.

human interactions in those societies are just as complicated and intricate as anyone else's. it's demeaning to generalize it as being as simple as "men rule, women are doormats" because there's a whole lot more going on there.

[~Jackie~ 30]

[morocco4ever 63]

Topics merged. Please keep the bickering clean or the thread will be closed.

We really do act like children don't we?

[abdo 0]

Again It is haram for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man

- Question :

Why a Muslim Woman Is Not Allowed to Marry a Non-Muslim Man ?

- Answer :

First of all, it is to be stressed that Islam does not encourage the interfaith marriages. The general rule of Islam is that Muslims should marry Muslims. A Muslim male or female should not marry a non-Muslim male or female. The only exception is given to Muslim men who are allowed to marry the chaste girls from among the People of the Book.

However, a Muslim woman is better suited to a Muslim man than a woman of Christian or Jewish faith, regardless of her merits. This is because marriage is not based on fulfilling one’s sexual desires; rather, it is an institution. It aims to establish a home on the bases of tranquility, faith and Islamic morals. To fulfil this task, the whole family must apply Allah’s course and try to convey His message.

It is obvious that Islam made it impermissible for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim with aim of keeping her away from things that may jeopardize her faith. In fact, Islam aims at protecting religion. To achieve this goal, it prohibits a Muslim from being involved in something that represents a threat to his religion. A Muslim woman will not feel that her religion is secure while being with a Jewish or a Christian husband especially as the majority of the People of the Book do not show due respect to our Prophet, Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).

Allah Almighty says: “And the Jews will not be pleased with thee, nor will the Christians, till thou follow their creed. Say: Lo! The guidance of Allah (Himself) is Guidance. And if thou shouldst follow their desires after the knowledge which hath come unto thee, then wouldst thou have from Allah no protecting friend nor helper.” (Al-Baqarah: 120)

Given the fact that the husband is generally the head of the household, it's not far-fetched for a non-Muslim husband to prevent his Muslim wife from performing some Islamic rituals which may seem a nuisance to him, for example fasting, or even refraining from marital relations during the fast. As a result, he might force her to change her religion, and if she refuses, the situation may culminate in divorce.

As for why Islam allows a Muslim man to marry a Christian or Jewish woman, it's clear that every Muslim believes in Moses and Jesus (peace be upon them) and he holds all the Prophets of Allah in high esteem. Thus a Muslim finds no harm in his wife’s being a Christian or a Jew, for the spirit of tolerance Islam holds for other religions is ingrained in him.

In his response to the question you raised, the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Muhammad Al-Hanooti, member of the North American Fiqh Council, states:

"If Allah is the one who prohibits a Muslim woman from marrying a non-Muslim, then we as Muslims are supposed to believe it and to take it. As a matter of faith, you cannot become a Muslim unless you accept everything when it is ordained by Allah or carried out by his Messenger. The Qur'an says, "O Ye who believe! Put not yourselves forward before Allah and His Messenger…" (Al-Hujurat: )

If you ask about the benefits of not marrying a non-Muslim, we can count you many reasons. A man is the manager of his household. He will persecute his Muslim wife in many dos and don'ts. She can hardly guarantee that kind of operation. Moreover, marriage is an institution for elevating our levels of having a good Islamic life. Pleasing Allah is our number one goal. If a woman is married to a non-Muslim, maybe the only thing she will accomplish in her marital life is what is good for livestock."

Shedding more light on the question, we'd like to cite the words of the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheik Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, in his well-known book, The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam:

"It is haram for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man, regardless of whether he is of the People of the Book or not. We have already mentioned the saying of Allah, "...and do not marry (your girls) to idolaters until they believe..." (Al-Baqarah: 221)

And He said concerning the immigrant Muslim women: "Then if you know them to be Believers, do not send them back to the unbelievers. They are not lawful for them (as wives), nor are they lawful for them (as husbands)." (Al-Mumtahanah: 10)

No text exists which makes exceptions for the People of the Book. Hence, on the basis of the above verses, there is a consensus among Muslims concerning this prohibition.

Thus, while a Muslim man is permitted to marry a Christian or Jewish woman, a Muslim woman is not allowed to marry a Christian or Jewish man. There are many sound reasons for this difference. First, the man is the head of the household, the one who maintains the family, and he is responsible for his wife. And while Islam guarantees freedom of belief and practice to the Christian or Jewish wife of a Muslim, safeguarding her rights according to her own faith, other religions, such as Judaism and Christianity, do not guarantee the wife of a different faith freedom of belief and practice, nor do they safeguard her rights. Since this is the case, how can Islam take chances on the future of its daughters by giving them into the hands of people who neither honor their religion nor are concerned to protect their rights?

A marriage between a man and woman of different faiths can be based only on the husband's respect for his wife's beliefs; otherwise a good relationship can never develop. Now, the Muslim believes that both Judaism and Christianity originated in divine revelation, although later distortions were introduced into them. He also believes that God revealed the Tawrah to Moses and the Injeel to Jesus, and that both Moses and Jesus (peace be on them) were among the Messengers of Allah who were distinguished by their steadfast determination. Accordingly, the Christian or Jewish wife of a Muslim lives under the protection of a man who respects the basic tenets of her faith, her Scripture, and her Prophets, while in contrast to this the Jew or Christian recognizes neither the Divine origin of Islam, its Book, or its Prophet (peace be on him). How then could a Muslim woman live with such a man, while her religion requires of her the observance of certain worships, duties, and obligations, as well as certain prohibitions. It would be impossible for the Muslim woman to retain her respect for her beliefs as well as to practice her religion properly if she were opposed in this regard by the master of the house at every step.

It will be realized from this that Islam is consistent with itself in prohibiting the Muslim man to marry a mushrik (polytheist) woman, for since Islam is absolutely opposed to shirk (polytheism), it would obviously be impossible for two such people to live together in harmony and love."

[~~~water~~~ 0]

is it worth reading the whole thread???

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Mothers in history usually didnt start to go to work until later years either. My grandmother and mother never worked and did the house and kids but come my generation we work, teach the kids, do the house and all, and men in todays times have given way to share alot of the responsibilities its all in the mutual agreements of the couple to each their own. I have taught my boys to cook, clean and do laundry and hope they respect their wives to help. Just because a mother has strength in her religion does not make the children follow.

[amal 4]

To NANA_356 :

believe me you are not muslim if you dont love MOHAMED ?if you dont believe me then go ask anyone IMAM or any 3ALIM ..

and if she chooses not to believe you then is her fate of her life as a muslim in your hands... we dont think so

Thanks Tamara, I am muslim, born and raised in abu dhabi, my parents are egyptian, and I grew up seeing many things that I did not like, and I always vowed to never do the same. Thank you for the support VJ family

Is the thread about ALL of VJ attacking Islam or just MENA? Cuz I dont see too many here attacking anyone. I see a small handful filling their time with back and forth bickering.

I have important things to face in my real life. Like the reality of 'obeying' my husband and defying him on some personal issues. Thanks for the words of support from my sisters here, of all religions.

Jackie

"obeying"

YOU ARE WRONG NANA_356 AND YOU SHOULD ASK IMAM OR 3ALIM..

to be a muslim women you should love MOHAMED more than you love yourself,that what ISLAM says

I stayed quiet as I was reading the multi pages of this topic that has been over-discussed and I just can't get past this one without commenting.

Ok, here's what I have to say. I'm not sure where u went to muslim school at BUT I recall shehada stating that I believe in only 1 God and that Prophet Mohammed was a messenger of God. NOW where in there does it say ..I believe in only 1 God and I love prophet Mohammed???

I'm a muslimah and I believe that to be muslim , you have to say shehadah and truely believe it. Everything else will come in time but u HAVE to believe in shehadah. If, in fact, Shehada stated that I believe in only 1 God but love prophet Mohammed, I wouldn't have said it BECAUSE in Islam, nobody is to idolize any of the prophets as they all carried the message from THE SAME GOD.

I believe in Prophet Mohammed and that he was a messenger of God. I am Muslim. I do not "love" the Prophet but I do respect him very much as he was chosen by the one and only God to bring the message to the people.

Thank you

*steps off of soap box and quietly returns to the agonizing wait for news*

amal

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

First of all, it is to be stressed that Islam does not encourage the interfaith marriages. The general rule of Islam is that Muslims should marry Muslims.

ok here we go again... soooo if your religion does NOT encourage the interfaith marriages... then go preach to the muslim men about why they married Christian women!!! leave the women here alone!

Edited April 21, 2008 by TamaraLovesAdam

[brnidokiegurl 0]

is it worth reading the whole thread???

[abdo 0]

To NANA_356 :

believe me you are not muslim if you dont love MOHAMED ?if you dont believe me then go ask anyone IMAM or any 3ALIM ..

and if she chooses not to believe you then is her fate of her life as a muslim in your hands... we dont think so

Thanks Tamara, I am muslim, born and raised in abu dhabi, my parents are egyptian, and I grew up seeing many things that I did not like, and I always vowed to never do the same. Thank you for the support VJ family

Is the thread about ALL of VJ attacking Islam or just MENA? Cuz I dont see too many here attacking anyone. I see a small handful filling their time with back and forth bickering.

I have important things to face in my real life. Like the reality of 'obeying' my husband and defying him on some personal issues. Thanks for the words of support from my sisters here, of all religions.

Jackie

"obeying"

YOU ARE WRONG NANA_356 AND YOU SHOULD ASK IMAM OR 3ALIM..

to be a muslim women you should love MOHAMED more than you love yourself,that what ISLAM says

I stayed quiet as I was reading the multi pages of this topic that has been over-discussed and I just can't get past this one without commenting.

Ok, here's what I have to say. I'm not sure where u went to muslim school at BUT I recall shehada stating that I believe in only 1 God and that Prophet Mohammed was a messenger of God. NOW where in there does it say ..I believe in only 1 God and I love prophet Mohammed???

I'm a muslimah and I believe that to be muslim , you have to say shehadah and truely believe it. Everything else will come in time but u HAVE to believe in shehadah. If, in fact, Shehada stated that I believe in only 1 God but love prophet Mohammed, I wouldn't have said it BECAUSE in Islam, nobody is to idolize any of the prophets as they all carried the message from THE SAME GOD.

I believe in Prophet Mohammed and that he was a messenger of God. I am Muslim. I do not "love" the Prophet but I do respect him very much as he was chosen by the one and only God to bring the message to the people.

Thank you

*steps off of soap box and quietly returns to the agonizing wait for news*

amal

i know what is going on there in EGYPT AND JORDAN,people there dont love MOHAMED even if they are muslim..

the problem is why people cant go and ask if they dont believe that to ba a muslim person you should LOVE mohamed..?

[ya falaha! 0]

You're really gonna have to refrain from posting this copy & paste nonsense. Those who care know where to find it. It's just bogging down the forum at this point. Personally, I couldn't care less if a Muslim woman marries a non Muslim man. You're not making the point you think you are here. Opinions of imams or whatever from the internet hardly proves anything. Why don't you leave the judging about this subject up to God? Or are *you* a more perfect judge????

Again It is haram for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man

- Question :

Why a Muslim Woman Is Not Allowed to Marry a Non-Muslim Man ?

- Answer :

First of all, it is to be stressed that Islam does not encourage the interfaith marriages. The general rule of Islam is that Muslims should marry Muslims. A Muslim male or female should not marry a non-Muslim male or female. The only exception is given to Muslim men who are allowed to marry the chaste girls from among the People of the Book.

However, a Muslim woman is better suited to a Muslim man than a woman of Christian or Jewish faith, regardless of her merits. This is because marriage is not based on fulfilling one’s sexual desires; rather, it is an institution. It aims to establish a home on the bases of tranquility, faith and Islamic morals. To fulfil this task, the whole family must apply Allah’s course and try to convey His message.

It is obvious that Islam made it impermissible for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim with aim of keeping her away from things that may jeopardize her faith. In fact, Islam aims at protecting religion. To achieve this goal, it prohibits a Muslim from being involved in something that represents a threat to his religion. A Muslim woman will not feel that her religion is secure while being with a Jewish or a Christian husband especially as the majority of the People of the Book do not show due respect to our Prophet, Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him).

Allah Almighty says: “And the Jews will not be pleased with thee, nor will the Christians, till thou follow their creed. Say: Lo! The guidance of Allah (Himself) is Guidance. And if thou shouldst follow their desires after the knowledge which hath come unto thee, then wouldst thou have from Allah no protecting friend nor helper.” (Al-Baqarah: 120)

Given the fact that the husband is generally the head of the household, it's not far-fetched for a non-Muslim husband to prevent his Muslim wife from performing some Islamic rituals which may seem a nuisance to him, for example fasting, or even refraining from marital relations during the fast. As a result, he might force her to change her religion, and if she refuses, the situation may culminate in divorce.

As for why Islam allows a Muslim man to marry a Christian or Jewish woman, it's clear that every Muslim believes in Moses and Jesus (peace be upon them) and he holds all the Prophets of Allah in high esteem. Thus a Muslim finds no harm in his wife’s being a Christian or a Jew, for the spirit of tolerance Islam holds for other religions is ingrained in him.

In his response to the question you raised, the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Muhammad Al-Hanooti, member of the North American Fiqh Council, states:

"If Allah is the one who prohibits a Muslim woman from marrying a non-Muslim, then we as Muslims are supposed to believe it and to take it. As a matter of faith, you cannot become a Muslim unless you accept everything when it is ordained by Allah or carried out by his Messenger. The Qur'an says, "O Ye who believe! Put not yourselves forward before Allah and His Messenger…" (Al-Hujurat: )

If you ask about the benefits of not marrying a non-Muslim, we can count you many reasons. A man is the manager of his household. He will persecute his Muslim wife in many dos and don'ts. She can hardly guarantee that kind of operation. Moreover, marriage is an institution for elevating our levels of having a good Islamic life. Pleasing Allah is our number one goal. If a woman is married to a non-Muslim, maybe the only thing she will accomplish in her marital life is what is good for livestock."

Shedding more light on the question, we'd like to cite the words of the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheik Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, in his well-known book, The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam:

"It is haram for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man, regardless of whether he is of the People of the Book or not. We have already mentioned the saying of Allah, "...and do not marry (your girls) to idolaters until they believe..." (Al-Baqarah: 221)

And He said concerning the immigrant Muslim women: "Then if you know them to be Believers, do not send them back to the unbelievers. They are not lawful for them (as wives), nor are they lawful for them (as husbands)." (Al-Mumtahanah: 10)

No text exists which makes exceptions for the People of the Book. Hence, on the basis of the above verses, there is a consensus among Muslims concerning this prohibition.

Thus, while a Muslim man is permitted to marry a Christian or Jewish woman, a Muslim woman is not allowed to marry a Christian or Jewish man. There are many sound reasons for this difference. First, the man is the head of the household, the one who maintains the family, and he is responsible for his wife. And while Islam guarantees freedom of belief and practice to the Christian or Jewish wife of a Muslim, safeguarding her rights according to her own faith, other religions, such as Judaism and Christianity, do not guarantee the wife of a different faith freedom of belief and practice, nor do they safeguard her rights. Since this is the case, how can Islam take chances on the future of its daughters by giving them into the hands of people who neither honor their religion nor are concerned to protect their rights?

A marriage between a man and woman of different faiths can be based only on the husband's respect for his wife's beliefs; otherwise a good relationship can never develop. Now, the Muslim believes that both Judaism and Christianity originated in divine revelation, although later distortions were introduced into them. He also believes that God revealed the Tawrah to Moses and the Injeel to Jesus, and that both Moses and Jesus (peace be on them) were among the Messengers of Allah who were distinguished by their steadfast determination. Accordingly, the Christian or Jewish wife of a Muslim lives under the protection of a man who respects the basic tenets of her faith, her Scripture, and her Prophets, while in contrast to this the Jew or Christian recognizes neither the Divine origin of Islam, its Book, or its Prophet (peace be on him). How then could a Muslim woman live with such a man, while her religion requires of her the observance of certain worships, duties, and obligations, as well as certain prohibitions. It would be impossible for the Muslim woman to retain her respect for her beliefs as well as to practice her religion properly if she were opposed in this regard by the master of the house at every step.

It will be realized from this that Islam is consistent with itself in prohibiting the Muslim man to marry a mushrik (polytheist) woman, for since Islam is absolutely opposed to shirk (polytheism), it would obviously be impossible for two such people to live together in harmony and love."

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

i know what is going on there in EGYPT AND JORDAN,people there dont love MOHAMED even if they are muslim..

the problem is why people cant go and ask if they dont believe that to ba a muslim person you should LOVE mohamed..?

what is there for them to go and ask? nothing... because thier beliefs is just that... THEIR personal beliefs... they dont need to get validation from anyone about what they believe or why

[sarahaziz 0]

It's 50/50 I see in these inter-cultural marriages. It's not only the woman it's the man also. America differs extremely with MENA country's. Yeah the MENA man will be cool with you before marriage want to learn about American heritage but after marriage he expects his wife to follow his way majority of the time. If an Arab man doesn't like how his life is with his western wife well that's 50% of his fault for living in dreamland. Women from all parts of the world expect something different from a man.

Some woman on here have open minded husbands and I'd like to say they are extremely blessed. I can't stress this enough for alot of people living in dreamland now. Men are spoiled by mothers, sisters and aunts. Men there often rule over ALL the women in the family if no father/husband is present. They don't come into marriage maturely, they have been taken care of like young children even at an adult age and no one has taught what is marriage and how to's in marriage like the seminars they have in USA, the counseling. People here are more strong in their understanding and tolerance vs a person from a MENA country. As a wife you'd have to teach them all these things before you are together and when you are together.

MeNA Parents don't usually teach about sexual relations (unless they've gone out done it , divorced, Videos, etc.)

How to talk with a wife and what is expected in a marriage from them.

MENA girls now that's a different story they get it alot harder than men. They are taught to cook, clean, how to talk when to talk and what to say. Western men marrying MENA women wow hahah mother + wife all in one