So does it really suck when they get here or what?

[Staashi 371]

The one phrase that comes to mind aside from all of this is to remember..."No good deed ever goes unpunished." Sometimes no matter how hard you try, you will still be yelled at.

Good luck and breathe it out.

[~Jackie~ 30]

.....and sometimes no matter how hard you try...........the fairy tale ends badly. (told you I wasn't gonna be good for this thread)

j

[Nasturtium 500]

Oh! I'd reccomend staying away from describing any behavior, statement, or himself as "rude." Dh shuts down if he gets upset and stops talking to me (or anyone). I told him that by not answering my quesitons when we're trying to have an argument and just ignoring me is a rude thing to do. OMG. I got this 10 minute lecture about how he is NOt rude, he was raised by good parents, and on and on. It was just so much more infuriating But apparantly it can be taken to be an insult on their family

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

ok so things NOT to say and do:

you are in the doghouse

you are a donkey

throwing a shoe at the guy

others?

i threw a tomato..does that count

[~Jackie~ 30]

......and NEVER say anything about being used for a greencard.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

ok so things NOT to say and do:

you are in the doghouse

you are a donkey

throwing a shoe at the guy

others?

i threw a tomato..does that count

it was in tunisia in august....and it was onmy salad and he was criticising me so i tossed it at him....in a restaurant......it became...............shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee threw a tomaaaaatooooooooooooooo at meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

......and NEVER say anything about being used for a greencard.

even if he is........tell him .......................you are using me for my smokin hot body............................

[SaadBell 0]

I think marriage is an adjustment period, but I can see where culture problems could make that even harder. My husband drives, so that is good, he has lived in America before, so he is coming knowing what this country really is about. Husband is an English teacher, so language is not a problem. I am sure there will be things that we will face when he comes; you just got to hang with them, and know that it takes a lot of work sometimes. Pick your battles wisely, easier said than done. I think listening to others, and their experience, and what worked for them helps so much. So sharing your experiences and what works and doesn’t for you, does help all of us.

[Aymerlu 3]

I guess we're not normal because we really haven't had any problems till recently, but I relate that to my whacked out hormones. Yeah, we had little disagreements, but never really arguements. I had pretty much laid things out to him before he got here. Yeah, maybe I was the biotchy woman, but I was not going through what I'd been through before. He also came from a bad marriage so he understood what I meant. He told me what he expected to and what i didn't like I told him about it. Yes, I did have to come to agreements with some things too. Everything has been good though!

This has been more my experience as well. We've gotten along beautifully w/ very little difficulty in adjusting. AOS taking so long was a little stressful and being homesick is totally understandable. All in all, we've had a pretty easy time of it.

I'll have to throw in the funnies though. I knew how his sisters waited on him hand and foot. He'd say "I'm hungry" and they would jump! There are still times that he'll say he's hungry.....AFTER we've ate dinner and I'll just give him that "yah.....ok" look. He was also used to his sisters pampering him when he got sick. I'm not saying that I don't pay extra attention to him, but ya know when a man gets sick and they act like the end of the world is coming? I swear it's a lot worse with a MENA man! LOL.

Yes, we have compromised on many things. I know no matter how many times I ask him to put his dirty dishes in the dishwasher, it will never happen just like he knows I'm not going to jump up early in the morning to have a big breakfast for him.

I don't know if this makes a difference, but my husband was a bit 'older' when he got here so maybe he grew up a bit before I got him.

[~Jackie~ 30]

yea it sucks

[doodlebugg 10]

Well hopefully we won't have to wait long for the EAD. Vermont seems to have a reasonable timeline going on lately so unless that changes it should be about 45 to 60 days which is fine.

EAD processing has nothing to do with VSC timelines - they are processed through MSC. 90 days is still average (although VJ stats do state 72 at the moment).

Hmmm that's not what I was told in another thread. I'm filing EAD separately from AOS and I was told it goes to my center which is VSC. http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t&p=1702649

[ayesha4akram 0]

ok so things NOT to say and do:

you are in the doghouse

you are a donkey

throwing a shoe at the guy

others?

Do NOT use the expression jokingly: you ate like a pig.

That was a big no no

Don't start a sentence, (during an argument): If you were man enough....

[LaL 418]

Well hopefully we won't have to wait long for the EAD. Vermont seems to have a reasonable timeline going on lately so unless that changes it should be about 45 to 60 days which is fine.

EAD processing has nothing to do with VSC timelines - they are processed through MSC. 90 days is still average (although VJ stats do state 72 at the moment).

Hmmm that's not what I was told in another thread. I'm filing EAD separately from AOS and I was told it goes to my center which is VSC. http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t&p=1702649

ah!@ i missed the part where you were filing prior to AOS. thanks!

[doodlebugg 10]

things to be added to the list of things not to say....

"oh Jesus", Is constantly falling out of my mouth, hubby doesnt like that, lol, are u surprised?

i once jokingly referred to him as "an immigrant" nope bad move....

and also, "your in the doghouse" yep i learned that one the hard way too!

OMG I don't know why but when something happens like stubbing my toe or I get really freaked out I would yell Jesus!!! and he would get sooooo ticked and say, "you are not Christian you are Muslim!". I'd just look at him 'cause that makes no sense.....for if I were Christian i wouldn't be taking the lord's name in vain. I tried explaining that but now I need a new OMG word and I need to practice it when I stub my toe or bump into something. lol

[ya falaha! 0]

We filed EAD separate as well and it was processed through MSC. Forgive me if I'm wrong but isn't EAD still sent to Chicago?

Well hopefully we won't have to wait long for the EAD. Vermont seems to have a reasonable timeline going on lately so unless that changes it should be about 45 to 60 days which is fine.

EAD processing has nothing to do with VSC timelines - they are processed through MSC. 90 days is still average (although VJ stats do state 72 at the moment).

Hmmm that's not what I was told in another thread. I'm filing EAD separately from AOS and I was told it goes to my center which is VSC. http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t&p=1702649

[doodlebugg 10]

ok so things NOT to say and do:

you are in the doghouse

you are a donkey

throwing a shoe at the guy

others?

Do NOT use the expression jokingly: you ate like a pig.

That was a big no no

Don't start a sentence, (during an argument): If you were man enough....

oooooh those are two BIGGIES!!!!

We filed EAD separate as well and it was processed through MSC. Forgive me if I'm wrong but isn't EAD still sent to Chicago?

Well hopefully we won't have to wait long for the EAD. Vermont seems to have a reasonable timeline going on lately so unless that changes it should be about 45 to 60 days which is fine.

EAD processing has nothing to do with VSC timelines - they are processed through MSC. 90 days is still average (although VJ stats do state 72 at the moment).

Hmmm that's not what I was told in another thread. I'm filing EAD separately from AOS and I was told it goes to my center which is VSC. http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t&p=1702649

The guides are wrong. The uscis directions say to file according to their list and for me it will be directly with VSC. http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...t&p=1709388