Jump to content
brnidokiegurl

REDNECK PICKUP LINES

By brnidokiegurl in Off Topic

 Share

13 posts in this topic

Recommended Posts

brnidokiegurl Grand Master

brnidokiegurl   0

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Morocco
 Timeline
Posted

1) Did you fart?

cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?

cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea.

I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?

cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?

cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"

Woman - "WHAT?"

Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?

I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window clea ner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

TIMELINE

04/04/2007 K1 Interview from H...w/the devil herself

06/12/2007 Rec'd Notification Case Now Back In Calif. only to expire

-------------

11/20/2007 Married in Morocco

02/23/2008 Mailed CR1 application today

03/08/2008 NOA1 Notice Recd (notice date 3/4/08)

08/26/2008 File transfered fr Vermont to Calif

10/14/2008 APPROVALLLLLLLLLLLL

10/20/2008 Recd hard copy NOA2

10/20/2008 NVC Recd case

11/21/2008 CASE COMPLETE

01/15/2009 INTERVIEW

01/16/2009 VISA IN HAND

01/31/2009 ARRIVED OKC

BE WHO YOU ARE AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL, BECAUSE THOSE WHO MIND DONT MATTER AND THOSE WHO MATTER DONT MIND

YOU CANT CHANGE THE PAST BUT YOU CAN RUIN THE PRESENT BY WORRYING OVER THE FUTURE

TRIP.... OVER LOVE, AND YOU CAN GET UP

FALL.... IN LOVE, AND YOU FALL FOREVER

I DO HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, JUST NOT THE ABILITY

LIKE THE MEASLES, LOVE IS MOST DANGEROUS WHEN IT COMES LATER IN LIFE

LIFE IS NOT THE WAY ITS SUPPOSED TO BE, ITS THE WAY IT IS

I MAY NOT BE WHERE I WANT TO BE BUT IM SURE NOT WHERE I WAS

Link to comment
Share on other sites
EstebanTrabajos Mentor

EstebanTrabajos   7

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Mexico
 Timeline
Posted (edited)

Get rrrr done!

Good ones!

Edited by GueraYTavo

05/01/08 Green Card in mailbox!!

06/05/10 Real GREEN Card RECEIVED!

01/17/13 Sent application for US Citizenship!!!

01/19/13 Arrived to Arizona Lockbox

01/24/13 Notice of Action

01/25/13 Check cashed

01/28/13 NOA received by mail and biometrics letter mailed as per uscis.gov

02/14/13 Biometrics appointment

03/18/13 In-line for inteview

Link to comment
Share on other sites
pedroh Grand Master

pedroh   21

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Mexico
 Timeline
Posted
{A4D84EA5-8C38-450F-9270-96FD3A3B9668}Img100.jpg

El Presidente of VJ

regalame una sonrisita con sabor a viento

tu eres mi vitamina del pecho mi fibra

tu eres todo lo que me equilibra,

un balance, lo que me conplementa

un masajito con sabor a menta,

Deutsch: Du machst das richtig

Wohnen Heute

3678632315_87c29a1112_m.jpgdancing-bear.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites
almaty Grand Master

almaty   19

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Kazakhstan
 Timeline
Posted

Use them all ...in high school....my nuts were the size of coconuts from getting knee in the nuts..by the young ladies ..but, every once in awhile....

Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

Link to comment
Share on other sites
panamania79 Mentor

panamania79   2

Posted
Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Panama
 Timeline
Posted
1) Did you fart?

cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?

cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea.

I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?

cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?

cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"

Woman - "WHAT?"

Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?

I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window clea ner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

:rofl:

May 7,2007-USCIS received I-129f
July 24,2007-NOA1 was received
April 21,2008-K-1 visa denied.
June 3,2008-waiver filed at US Consalate in Panama
The interview went well,they told him it will take another 6 months for them to adjudicate the waiver
March 3,2009-US Consulate claims they have no record of our December visit,nor Manuel's interview
March 27,2009-Manuel returned to the consulate for another interrogation(because they forgot about December's interview),and they were really rude !
April 3,2009-US Counsalate asks for more court documents that no longer exist !
June 1,2009-Manuel and I go back to the US consalate AGAIN to give them a letter from the court in Colon along with documents I already gave them last year.I was surprised to see they had two thick files for his case !


June 15,2010-They called Manuel in to take his fingerprints again,still no decision on his case!
June 22,2010-WAIVER APPROVED at 5:00pm
July 19,2010-VISA IN MANUELITO'S HAND at 3:15pm!
July 25,2010-Manuelito arrives at 9:35pm at Logan Intn'l Airport,Boston,MA
August 5,2010-FINALLY MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!
August 23,2010-Filed for AOS at the International Institute of RI $1400!
December 23,2010-Work authorization received.
January 12,2011-RFE

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Nessa Grand Master

Nessa   23

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
 Timeline
Posted

lmao :lol: :lol:



* K1 Timeline *
* 04/07/06: I-129F Sent to NSC
* 10/02/06: Interview date - APPROVED!
* 10/10/06: POE Houston
* 11/25/06: Wedding day!!!

* AOS/EAD/AP Timeline *
*01/05/07: AOS/EAD/AP sent
*02/19/08: AOS approved
*02/27/08: Permanent Resident Card received

* LOC Timeline *
*12/31/09: Applied Lifting of Condition
*01/04/10: NOA
*02/12/10: Biometrics
*03/03/10: LOC approved
*03/11/10: 10 years green card received

* Naturalization Timeline *
*12/17/10: package sent
*12/29/10: NOA date
*01/19/11: biometrics
*04/12/11: interview
*04/15/11: approval letter
*05/13/11: Oath Ceremony - Officially done with Immigration.

Complete Timeline

Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...
kitty loves moudi Community Regular

kitty loves moudi   0

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Lebanon
 Timeline
Posted
:rofl::rofl: NEEDED THAT LAUGH!!

USCIS (Total 212 days)

05-15-08 Received call from VSC - I was Approved Yay!

NVC (Total Days: 00)

-----

05/21/2008 : NVC Case# Assigned

05/26/2008 : I-864 AOS Fee Bill invoiced in NVC system.

05/26/2008 : DS-3032 generated

05/31/2008 : DS-3032 emailed by my spouse

06/02/2008 : AOS ($70) Paid online

06/03/2008 : I-864 AOS Barcode cover sheet generated

06/03/2008 : I-864 AOS Generated

06/11/2008 : Choice of agent email accepted at NVC

00/00/2008 : I-864 AOS package delivered to NVC

00/00/2008 : I-864 AOS package entered into NVC system

06/11/2008 : DS-3032 email reply received from NVC to my spouse

06/18/2008 : DS-230 IV Fee Bill Paid online ($400)

06/20/2008 : DS-230 IV Fee Barcode cover sheet generated.

06/20/2008 : DS-230 Packet generated and mailed by NVC

00/00/2008 : DS-230 package mailed to NVC by USPS Express mail

00/00/2008 : DS-230 IV Package delivered to NVC

00/00/2008 : DS-230 IV package entered into NVC system

00/00/2008 : Case Completed at NVC

Beirut U.S Embassy (Total Days: 0)

--------------------------

00/nn/2008 : Case Forwarded to Beirut U.S Embassy by DHL

00/nn/2008 : Medical at Beirut

00/nn/2008 : U.S Embassy Interview

-------------

00/nn/2008 : Arrival at U.S Port of Entry

Link to comment
Share on other sites
william_wallace Proficient

william_wallace   8

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Scotland
 Timeline
Posted

Is it that cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tac's.

What do you say we go back to my crib and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply

I have a six inch tongue and I can breath through my ears

You're ugly but you intrigue me

I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good

Are you free tonight or is it gonna cost me?

Why don't you get down on your knees and smile like a doughnut?

Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them.

beach_1_001.jpg
Link to comment
Share on other sites
 

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share
Go to topic listing
- Back to Top -

Important Disclaimer: Please read carefully the Visajourney.com Terms of Service. If you do not agree to the Terms of Service you should not access or view any page (including this page) on VisaJourney.com. Answers and comments provided on Visajourney.com Forums are general information, and are not intended to substitute for informed professional medical, psychiatric, psychological, tax, legal, investment, accounting, or other professional advice. Visajourney.com does not endorse, and expressly disclaims liability for any product, manufacturer, distributor, service or service provider mentioned or any opinion expressed in answers or comments. VisaJourney.com does not condone immigration fraud in any way, shape or manner. VisaJourney.com recommends that if any member or user knows directly of someone involved in fraudulent or illegal activity, that they report such activity directly to the Department of Homeland Security, Immigration and Customs Enforcement. You can contact ICE via email at Immigration.Reply@dhs.gov or you can telephone ICE at 1-866-347-2423. All reported threads/posts containing reference to immigration fraud or illegal activities will be removed from this board. If you feel that you have found inappropriate content, please let us know by contacting us here with a url link to that content. Thank you.
×
×
  • Create New...