share your experience with meeting with your in-laws

[amerasianlove 0]

Hello Everyone!! Since i didnt meet my future in-laws in person,

for those of you who already met them, how was the feeling for the FIRST TIME seeing /talking to them?(in person)

Was it like nerve -wracking,nail -tingling,spine chilling situation??ok ok!im being exaggerated!

I just wanna know how was it?and for those who havent met their soon to be inlaws...are you nervous?????

[BlakeandOlha 0]

Hello Everyone!! Since i didnt meet my future in-laws in person,

for those of you who already met them, how was the feeling for the FIRST TIME seeing /talking to them?(in person)

Was it like nerve -wracking,nail -tingling,spine chilling situation??ok ok!im being exaggerated!

I just wanna know how was it?and for those who havent met their soon to be inlaws...are you nervous?????

That's a great question, and one that just about every one of us has had to face. One of the simple facts about international relationships is that the two people just can't be with each other all of the time. So the gradual introduction of loved ones to parents isn't realistic. Rather, usually the falling in love and deciding to spend the rest of your lives together occurs not within the framework of the greater family, but in the one on one relationship between the two. So, I understand the anxiety you feel about meeting the future in-laws for the same time. For me it wasn't difficult - although Olga's father did say that a relationship with a man on the other side of the world was "fantastical," our committment to one another has made him a believer. I share many interests with Olga's father which helps a lot, but moreover I am very interested in him as a person.

The in-laws should become great friends, and that should be the goal of your relationship with them - their approval or not is/should be secondary. Just be yourself, be interested in what they have to say, and show yourself to be the type of person their child will be happy with. Enjoy the first visit, and remember everything - it will be the subject of conversations with your spouse for years to come. Good Luck!!

[jego ryu 0]

yes at first i was nervous because not only my mother inlaw to be i met that time,,,my fiance grandma,sister and his auntie and uncle,,,im speechless that time,,,they are really nice to me,,,we have a good together,,,my dad inlaw to be he came here in the phils.all the way from hawaii just to meet me and to see my son.i was so lucky to have inlaws like that.they are really nice and supportive....they really love thier first grandson(me and my fiance son)

[Alex & Rachel 78]

Alex lives with his parents so it was exceptionally nerve-wracking as I met Alex and my future in-laws for the first time within a half hour of each other. I'd taken quite the plunge by arranging to stay with them for three weeks - if Alex and I hadn't hit it off in person it would've been a very awkward three weeks.

Fortunately his parents (and mine) are of the open-arms welcome-into-our-family variety. Lots of hugs and smiles; they are very friendly people. The first night I don't believe we talked very much as I was tired and they didn't want to bother me with questions but I did eat a meal with them. The next day came the 'interrogation' - but it wasn't too bad. Fortunately Alex's mother has similar views and beliefs to me so I was able to answer all of her questions satisfactorily. I'd also been pre-warned what she might ask me about (politics, energy saving, my family, the variety of trees in England and food were the topics of conversation for that first week, if I remember correctly).

[GabiandVi 34]

I met my in-laws when my husband and I were still dating. I wasn't exactly nervous, but his mother didn't speak any French, only Fongbe, so we couldn't really communicate, and somehow, I had trouble understanding his sisters' and brothers' French.

He didn't meet my family until after we were married. He pretended he wasn't nervous, but I knew he was. He was very negative about how they weren't going to like him because he was Black. He fell in love with my mom, but my brother-in-law had talked about the "typical chaos" of my family, and he was taken with the phrase, so that is how he refers to it still. The poor guy met my family when we all (32 of us - I'm one of 8 children, all married with children of our own) shared a house at the beach for a week.

[Sen and Neil 0]

I couldn't sleep the night before the big day... meeting the in-laws! I asked my husband (then fiance) everything I need to know about them... My husband was so supportive, he kept assuring me that his family will like me. But no words can ease the anxiety I felt then. He suggested that I send an email to his mom, and I did. I stated there " Dear future Mother-in-Law....... love your daughter-in-law to be". She replied back, that helped remove some of the anxiety. Knowing that she too is so excited to meet me!

D-day.... a big warm hug melt all the tension and nervousness away. She was a nice lady. I love her instantly. She is now my second mom here. His sister and brothers welcomed me too. As expected, they were so curious about me. Asked me about my native country, what do I do there, how I found the US (especially the weather), am I loving it here etc....

Just be your self when it is time to meet them!!! Good luck!

[amerasianlove 0]

there is always a first time for everything i guess.I think im gonna puke when im about to meet them!

butterflies in my stomach...

Yeah u are totally right! Just be with myself.

[nane1104 146]

THe first time I met my in-laws was 3 weeks into my first visit here in the US and about 3 months after we had met online. I guess they knew about this "girl from Germany he had met somehow" and after a weekendtrip we detoured on the way back home to visit his family.

I was very nervous, tired and looked like ####### after a very long drive.

His mom opened the door and greeted me and asked me to come in, his two brothers were home aslo and said hello, but pretty much ignored me after that.

His Dad welcomed me and after a few words, we found out that he had been in Germany years ago so we had some common ground.

I remember hs mom was trying to figure out how we actually met (online but hubby had told them I was a student here or something).

We took his mom out for her birthday dinner and back at their house, she started showing me family photos, really old albums and we started chatting away. I have to say though, my husbands mom is from the Philipines and I had a really hard time to get used to her accent which made it a little difficult for us to have a conversation.

BUT- on the way back home late at night, my then boyfriend asked me about the albums his mom hd shown me and he said, he himself has never seen those before and that his mom never before has been that friendly and welcoming to any of her sons girlfriends. He was even married before and he said even with his ex wife his mom never had that. To quote him "I am impressed."

I remember a while later he told me that his brother's gf's family, who had another daughter was trying to hook them up (I guess they weren't aware of me since I was in Germany again) and his mom told them to leave him alone because he already has a girlfriend. I thought that was really sweet.

Two years later his dad passed and I came over to be with the family and I asked her what she wanted me to call her. Up to that point I was totally avoiding to call her anything and she said "Awe, Baby, you can call me whatever you feel like." So from then on I called her by her first name insted f the akward Mrs. J.

[sereia 0]

Well considering they don't speak English and I don't speak Arabic...there was a lot of nodding and smiling going around. My MIL cooked my (then boyfriend) and I lunch and I told her how beauuuuuutiful her teapot was. As soon as we were finished drinking tea she quickly washed it, wrapped it with bubble wrap, and handed it to me. Boy was I embarrassed! I didn't realize until later that it was part of their culture to give away things if you compliment it. So I've been careful about what I tell her I like now. hehe

[nane1104 146]

Well considering they don't speak English and I don't speak Arabic...there was a lot of nodding and smiling going around. My MIL cooked my (then boyfriend) and I lunch and I told her how beauuuuuutiful her teapot was. As soon as we were finished drinking tea she quickly washed it, wrapped it with bubble wrap, and handed it to me. Boy was I embarrassed! I didn't realize until later that it was part of their culture to give away things if you compliment it. So I've been careful about what I tell her I like now. hehe

Oh wow, that is a nice story. So much to learn about different cultures, huh?

My mil is about a 1'3" shorter than me (and of course there is a weight difference) and whenever she sees me, she greets me with "Oh NAdine, you got big, did you gain weight?" even when I had lost a lot of weight right before our wedding.

Oh well, took me a while to get used to THAT!!!

[Dr. Obvious 49]

About a week after we met, my husband and I were sitting on his bed. His parents were just coming home from vacation. He suddenly said that I had to meet them like right now. I said...noooooooo. He said yeeessss and basically dragged me out there. Awkwardness abounded. My German was a lot worse then and they speak no English for all intents and purposes. Beyond that, I wasn't sure what the point of this meeting was. There was a brief conversation, but they were exhausted from their trip, so that was that.

My husband met his mother-in-law-to-be about 4.5 months later here in the US. That was fun because my mother obviously had some kind of issue with him at the time. Everyone else loved my husband.

[Marilyn. 340]

I didn't meet my in-laws until about a year after we were married.... I was a little nervous... but they loved me after they met me

I just lost my mother-in-law last October... I was pretty close with her... she was a great mother-in-law...

[Mary Lou 682]

I was excited and nervous to meet Garys family. I met his sister first, cause she picked us up from the bus station. She hugged me right away and welcomed me, made me feel really good.

I had spoke to Garys parents on the phone before, so at least that was something. When we got to the house, his dad came out to meet us and hugs all around. Now my big worry was his mom lol She is the boss, she was a bit reserved, but was nice enough, i guess she didnt like anyone who was gonna take her son lol but she gave us her blessings.

I am real close with my sister in law, we have a great relationship. I feel so lucky.

I get on well with my father in law, and for the most part my mother in law, but she has a tendency to get in our business and cause problems between Gary and I.

Good thing i dont have to see her to often

[melusine 5]

I remember, i was quite nervous !

My sweet have like 6 brothers/sisters ! some of them married, some of them with kids etc...

I met them around xmas time when i was actually going to see him and live in his parent's place for about 1.5 month !

The first night, when we came back home around midnight, i met 2 of his sibling and the 2 dogs, that was nice. Also there is this habit in US to hug...wich is not something i'm very used too....lol. Then a note on our bedroom from their parents welcoming me (nice, really).

Then the next day (24th of december), i met his parents (with his mom beeing busy with a million things) and we went to his dad's office to meet him. We went at dinner at his older sister's house who have 3 kids wich was were i basically met everyone else ! Overall everything was cool.

I got some people asking questions, met another canadian (who were some neighbor friends), the wife of one of my brother in law talking french (with no american accent !) and one of my sister in law too. The husband of another sister in law (who can have a terrible temper ! (but i like him anyway)) asking about my futur work etc etc.

One of the night, i went downstairs, while waiting for my sweet and had a little talk with his mom where she told me she was sooo happy for both of us and that basically she liked me ! (that was great to hear, definelty).

At new years eve, i went around to say happy new year to the people around the house when i had a chance to meet them and got a little funny moment with his dad. As a french european i say happy new year by kissing the cheeks and well.... it didn't work that much ! so it was a strange moment but out from that everything was cool.

Also at some point his mom knock at the door and ask me if i would like to go with her to see some home/furniture antiques etc... I said yes because it would have feel great to go outside a house a little, also to have some time with his mom.... damn !

Ok i am a terrible passenger in a car because i tend to be scared by other cars etc.... damn... that time i wanted to die ! I kept my mouth shut but damn it !! The only thought i had was that if we would die at least it would be with some class (because her car is nice)...but her driving was freakin scary !

I regret a little bit to have been that shy while i was there but i guess it will go better with time.

[sj5 4]

i was nervous and shy.