police certificate

[shikarnov 7]

Yeah I don't think it's required either. Nadya's decided she's going to get it translated anyway, and I have better things to argue with her over, but I don't think it's necessary unless it's in a language other than Russian.

Ira got hers translated too... Given the affordable translation costs, and the power trips bureaucrats sometimes go on, it seemed like a no-brainer.

Z

[mox 298]

Ira got hers translated too... Given the affordable translation costs, and the power trips bureaucrats sometimes go on, it seemed like a no-brainer.

Agreed. Things like this I don't mind throwing a few dollars at.

[slim 1,525]

I didn't throw any dollars at that stuff. I figured she was a big girl and if she wanted to get a K-1, then she could acquire and pay for her documents.

I did, however, pay for her trip to Moscow and the related costs there. I thought she should pay her "fair share" (to me the girl paying at least for part of the expenses proves she's not scamming... not saying that was our case or your case, just saying think it over) but the costs of getting to/from Moscow and staying for a few days are astronomical from a non-Muscovite Russian standpoint. That, I didn't mind throwing a few dollars at.

She was pretty thrifty during the trip. Funny how expenses shrink when cash is in hand but yet when there are items to add to the cart (bebe.com, victoriassecret.com, Jlo.com, etc.) there's never enough money on the card. Different issue. Sorry. That, I do mind throwing a few dollars at.

Anyway, from where I sit, your beneficiary should be taking just as active a part as you in the visa process to include fronting some of the money. I understand there's a lack of resources on their side, but there should at least be some effort. If you're not getting any.... beware!

If your girl's just a slacker (like mox's seems to be.... she and I could be in the same "procrastinator posse") then pay it no mind. But, if you're trying to get everything going, and she's dragging her feet, telling you she needs more money, etc. (like the guy on here a few weeks back saying the biddies talked her out of it and she needed $450 more) then make her get more involved. You'll be glad you did.

Good luck, and remember, never do today what you can put off until tomorrow. (Abe Lincoln?)

[mox 298]

I did, however, pay for her trip to Moscow and the related costs there. I thought she should pay her "fair share" (to me the girl paying at least for part of the expenses proves she's not scamming... not saying that was our case or your case, just saying think it over) but the costs of getting to/from Moscow and staying for a few days are astronomical from a non-Muscovite Russian standpoint. That, I didn't mind throwing a few dollars at.

I think we've had this conversation before, but I'll repeat it anyway. If you're sending the girl to Moscow for her K-1 interview, and you have any lingering doubts at all as to if she's scamming you, then you really shouldn't be sending her to Moscow for a K-1 interview. Those doubts should have been removed ages ago. In fact, if you propose to a woman that you're not 100% convinced she's not scamming you, then you shouldn't be proposing to her.

Our friend with the "biddies" is the perfect example. You just know that guy was shelling out handfulls of cash on a weekly basis, never fully trusting her, but not wanting to admit that what he was feeling wasn't real.

She was pretty thrifty during the trip. Funny how expenses shrink when cash is in hand but yet when there are items to add to the cart (bebe.com, victoriassecret.com, Jlo.com, etc.) there's never enough money on the card. Different issue. Sorry. That, I do mind throwing a few dollars at.

Agreed!

Anyway, from where I sit, your beneficiary should be taking just as active a part as you in the visa process to include fronting some of the money. I understand there's a lack of resources on their side, but there should at least be some effort. If you're not getting any.... beware!

I'm paying for Nadya's full trip. I'm not paying for any shopping excursions or first class train fare, but I am paying for the trip and her meals. Mostly because I want to, and I think it's the right thing to do (I'm old sk001 gentleman--it's not quite fair of me to want all the advantages of a more traditional woman but not abide by the more traditional roles myself), but there's the practical matter that she's also unemployed at the moment, and me insisting that she pay part of her way would basically be a deal-breaker.

If your girl's just a slacker (like mox's seems to be.... she and I could be in the same "procrastinator posse") then pay it no mind. But, if you're trying to get everything going, and she's dragging her feet, telling you she needs more money, etc. (like the guy on here a few weeks back saying the biddies talked her out of it and she needed $450 more) then make her get more involved. You'll be glad you did.

It's funny...I don't think that until today, when she received packet 4, that it really sunk in to her that a) zomg this shiт‚ is really going to happen, and b) there's a lotta shiт involved in this process. She was pretty freaked out by it all, mostly because the forms (except the supplemental DS-156K) are in English. It was (as I mentioned) actually very funny and entertaining, although I'm sure I'm going to a deeper level of hell because I found it so funny. While she was sitting there freaking out, I was just thinking "welcome to a little taste of my world hon."

It did serve to give her a little kick in the pants though. Tomorrow she's going to "obtain" her shot record, get her passport photos, and work on getting translations done. Let me try to explain the magnitude of this feat through the use of a geological example: Nadya going out and doing all of this on one day would be like if the ancient super-continent of Pangea were to break up and re-form into the continents we know them as now, in about 4 hours. It would be like seeing the first and last dinosaur to walk the planet in about 11 seconds. It would be like if the last ice age took a mere tenth of a second to complete. It would be like...well I guess what I'm saying is that it's goddamned unprecedented. Oh Packet 4, where have you been all my life? Or...at least over the last month.

Edited April 2, 2008 by mox

[slim 1,525]

Hooray for the packet 4!

And Pangea breaking up in 4 hours? Dinosaurs walking, Ice ages, etc..... I watched 10,000 B.C. this weekend and there was a funny part in the movie where they were observing the pyramids getting built and the guys coming in on ships and all this new "technology" that they'd never seen before. One guy asked, "Where do they come from?" The answer, "From the stars!"

Seems like even back then they thought the pyramids were built by aliens.

[Satellite 1]

I think we've had this conversation before, but I'll repeat it anyway. If you're sending the girl to Moscow for her K-1 interview, and you have any lingering doubts at all as to if she's scamming you, then you really shouldn't be sending her to Moscow for a K-1 interview. Those doubts should have been removed ages ago. In fact, if you propose to a woman that you're not 100% convinced she's not scamming you, then you shouldn't be proposing to her.

I disagree. Because our "fiancées" are acquiring an immigration benefit through marriage, I think it is okay to be skeptical all the way until citizenship. If she is still with you with citizenship in hand, you can stop worrying about it. Too many stories of good gullible people being fooled, especially right here in on VJ.

[eekee 182]

Are there really that many cases where this happened and there weren't bright red flashing warning signs beforehand that the USC decided to ignore?

I think we've had this conversation before, but I'll repeat it anyway. If you're sending the girl to Moscow for her K-1 interview, and you have any lingering doubts at all as to if she's scamming you, then you really shouldn't be sending her to Moscow for a K-1 interview. Those doubts should have been removed ages ago. In fact, if you propose to a woman that you're not 100% convinced she's not scamming you, then you shouldn't be proposing to her.

I disagree. Because our "fiancées" are acquiring an immigration benefit through marriage, I think it is okay to be skeptical all the way until citizenship. If she is still with you with citizenship in hand, you can stop worrying about it. Too many stories of good gullible people being fooled, especially right here in on VJ.

[mox 298]

I think we've had this conversation before, but I'll repeat it anyway. If you're sending the girl to Moscow for her K-1 interview, and you have any lingering doubts at all as to if she's scamming you, then you really shouldn't be sending her to Moscow for a K-1 interview. Those doubts should have been removed ages ago. In fact, if you propose to a woman that you're not 100% convinced she's not scamming you, then you shouldn't be proposing to her.

I disagree. Because our "fiancées" are acquiring an immigration benefit through marriage, I think it is okay to be skeptical all the way until citizenship. If she is still with you with citizenship in hand, you can stop worrying about it. Too many stories of good gullible people being fooled, especially right here in on VJ.

Anyone who marries a woman they are suspicious of is a fool.

I was married to a woman for many years who I trusted implicitly. Turned out she was cheating on me the entire marriage. If I'd have been suspicious, I'd have caught it early. But if she had been an honest woman and I was suspicious, then the marriage would have been a failure too. The best you can do is trust your partner. If you don't trust them, then you shouldn't propose to them until you trust them. During the relationship phase is when you need to work that out, not the commitment phase.

[Bobalouie 0]

Yeah I don't think it's required either. Nadya's decided she's going to get it translated anyway, and I have better things to argue with her over, but I don't think it's necessary unless it's in a language other than Russian.

Thats what Elena did as well.

[slim 1,525]

Are there really that many cases where this happened and there weren't bright red flashing warning signs beforehand that the USC decided to ignore?

Not usually, but most USCs tend to ignore them because they're so "blissfully unaware" and want to believe that their fiancee/wife really does love them for them. I mean we're talking about cases, some of which the folks have met exactly ONCE before commiting to marriage, that are based entirely on "nice profile, wanna get married?" To believe that you can truly understand someone's motivations to the point of 100% trust in the relatively short period of contact is simply being whimsical. Sure there are fairy tale love stories that started with a mouse click, but the vast majority of these "point and click" marriages are a "learn as you go" process.

I agree with you that there are warning signs that should be adhered to and if ignored will lead to disaster. But I also believe along with Satellite that being 100% sure is being overconfident. There are lots of ways to reduce the risk, but it's always there no matter what. If you deny it's existence, then you're denying the truth.

That said, I also agree with mox that it should all be done in the relationship/courtship/whatever phase prior to the actual engagement and WAAAAAY prior to the "I dos." But, regardless of how much you know and trust, there's always that chance. You can take steps to minimize it, but you can't minimize it to zero no matter how hard you try. It's impossible.

Anyone who marries a woman they are suspicious of is a fool.

Then I'm a fool because I trust my wife about as far as I can throw her. Now I believe most of what she says, but I will never, ever, ever ever ever trust a woman, any woman, 100% in my life. Just can't do it. It's the nature of the beast.

I was married to a woman for many years who I trusted implicitly. Turned out she was cheating on me the entire marriage.

Can you look back on it now and say there was a correlation between your trust and her cheating? That perhaps your implicit trust created an environment where she was able to cheat? Not saying it was your trust that pushed her to cheat, but that you made it easier for her to do it once she reached that point.

If I'd have been suspicious, I'd have caught it early. But if she had been an honest woman and I was suspicious, then the marriage would have been a failure too.

It was a failure regardless. Honesty and suspicion were probably not the underlying factors, only the means to the end.

The best you can do is trust your partner. If you don't trust them, then you shouldn't propose to them until you trust them. During the relationship phase is when you need to work that out, not the commitment phase.

I disagree somewhat and will say the best thing you can do is be honest with your partner and then hold them accountable to your expectations and be willing to compromise to their expectations and respect their honesty as well. Being suspicious should never be necessary because the two of you should already be well aware of the other's actions and intentions, and if you're not, you damn well should be or else one of you is going to have to be dishonest somewhere down the road.

During the relationship is of course, the best time to figure all of this out. But, since we live in different countries, it's got to be figured out along the way as well. A good vibe and meeting a few times can give you a good sense of knowing if the person you're corresponding with is "the one" but these international marriages have to be worked on during the marriage. There's simply no time to do it before hand.

So, trust your spouse. But, hold that shadow of a doubt in your mind as well. More often than not, there are signs. It's how you "trust" to ignore them or not that will prove your success.

[mox 298]

Anyone who marries a woman they are suspicious of is a fool.

Then I'm a fool because I trust my wife about as far as I can throw her. Now I believe most of what she says, but I will never, ever, ever ever ever trust a woman, any woman, 100% in my life. Just can't do it. It's the nature of the beast.

If you mean trust as in "I can't trust her with money," then ok. If you mean trust as in "I don't trust her not to cheat on me," then I think you're losing out on a lot of happiness.

I was married to a woman for many years who I trusted implicitly. Turned out she was cheating on me the entire marriage.

Can you look back on it now and say there was a correlation between your trust and her cheating? That perhaps your implicit trust created an environment where she was able to cheat? Not saying it was your trust that pushed her to cheat, but that you made it easier for her to do it once she reached that point.

Oh absolutely she took advantage of my implicit trust. No question about it. Yes, I definitely made it easier for her to cheat. But that's exactly my point: She's the one with the problem, not me. I can absolutely state with a clear conscious that I gave her every opportunity in the world *not* to cheat. Had I been the suspicious type, I'd have always wondered if my suspicious nature drove her to these behaviors.

The best you can do is trust your partner. If you don't trust them, then you shouldn't propose to them until you trust them. During the relationship phase is when you need to work that out, not the commitment phase.

I disagree somewhat and will say the best thing you can do is be honest with your partner and then hold them accountable to your expectations and be willing to compromise to their expectations and respect their honesty as well. Being suspicious should never be necessary because the two of you should already be well aware of the other's actions and intentions, and if you're not, you damn well should be or else one of you is going to have to be dishonest somewhere down the road.

See now I actually agree with this, but you're contradicting yourself.

Now having said all that, I certainly a lot less naive about things than I was previously. I won't be going out of my way to look for "the signs," but I'm pretty sure that if the signs are there I'll see them this time around. But living with someone you are suspicious of is just misery incarnate.

[natashenika 0]

could you tell me how long does it usually take to get a police certificate in russia?

I'm ukrainian citizen, I studied in russia for 4 years and have to obtaine police certificate from russia, it's been more than a months since I ordered it and it's not ready yet.

Is it normal?

It takes 2 weeks to get one in Ukraine

thanks

Did you get your Ukrainian police certificate in two weeks? I've read that it can take a lot longer (I hope that is not the case). Please let me know.

yes it was exactly 2 weeks I paid a little extra for that expedite service when you apply for the police certificate you choose if you need it in 2 or 4 weeks

[payxibka 10,045]

could you tell me how long does it usually take to get a police certificate in russia?

I'm ukrainian citizen, I studied in russia for 4 years and have to obtaine police certificate from russia, it's been more than a months since I ordered it and it's not ready yet.

Is it normal?

It takes 2 weeks to get one in Ukraine

thanks

Did you get your Ukrainian police certificate in two weeks? I've read that it can take a lot longer (I hope that is not the case). Please let me know.

For Kiev Consulate purposes the police certificate is valid up to one year... There is simply no reason that you cannot plan ahead and get it in plenty of time before the interview..... even if it takes 4 weeks or better... (my wife's took 3 weeks)

[slim 1,525]

I never did really respond to the last round, anyway, complex issue, definitely just depends on the two individuals involved.

I'll close in saying simply because of the nature of the international relationship, there should be at minimum some increased skepticism. If you're a 100% trust-em kind of guy, then at least drop that down to 99.9%. It is a possibility. You decide how much. (And don't ignore the signs!)

[natashenika 0]

Finally they gave me the police certificate ( took them 2 months) will translate and notarize it tomorrow, and will bring everything to kiev embasy on Thursday ( hope for that)

Does anyone know how long it takes for the consulate to review additional documentation and give an answer????

thanks

Edited April 22, 2008 by natashenika