Russia girls are amazing!

[~Laura and Nick~ 5]

I believe the reason for our difficulty certainly stems from the fact that she makes hasty decisions and always portrays a dire need for whatever seems urgent at the moment. The "Official state translation agency" has her convinced that she must translate all of her documents and they all need to be stamped, apistiled, certified, and clad in gold:) They have convinced her that she must have her documents done this way in order for her to receive her visa in Moscow. In other words "they see her coming" and stick her(I mean ME) with the maximum price available. She prefers to take their advice over mine because I am only an American man ( I can't possibly know anything about Russia).

After all this time I don't feel that she is a scammer. But, I do feel that she has been spoiled in her previous relationships. I get the feeling that she is unfamiliar with someone telling her to try to conserve money. I guess I should just give her whatever her little heart desires:wacko: (I am being sarcastic of course). I really appreciate all of the input from everyone regarding this matter. Thank you!

I'm sorry but wake up.

As for chewing out the nice Russian lady who wanted to help her out...a saying comes to mind..."Methinks the lady doth protest too much." Something is fishy there.

I know you love her but open your eyes...as others have indicated, these prices are ridiculous and you are making every excuse to not call her out on it.

I hope you find out the truth before it's too late.

Best of luck!

[Bobalouie 0]

I believe the reason for our difficulty certainly stems from the fact that she makes hasty decisions and always portrays a dire need for whatever seems urgent at the moment. The "Official state translation agency" has her convinced that she must translate all of her documents and they all need to be stamped, apistiled, certified, and clad in gold:) They have convinced her that she must have her documents done this way in order for her to receive her visa in Moscow. In other words "they see her coming" and stick her(I mean ME) with the maximum price available. She prefers to take their advice over mine because I am only an American man ( I can't possibly know anything about Russia).

After all this time I don't feel that she is a scammer. But, I do feel that she has been spoiled in her previous relationships. I get the feeling that she is unfamiliar with someone telling her to try to conserve money. I guess I should just give her whatever her little heart desires:wacko: (I am being sarcastic of course). I really appreciate all of the input from everyone regarding this matter. Thank you!

Just FYI, no document needs to be notarized or apostilled. If she has university transcripts then it makes it easier here in America if those are apostilled, but all the Unis I talked with said it wasnt necessary, but it would be looked favorably upon.

[Don E 0]

From what you've shared, I have some thoughts that I'll share with you. Is your fiancee working? How was she getting by before you started sending her money? $600/month is alot for the "average" Russian, and she should be living quite well just on that in Ufa. Did she ask you for this money? If so, that was one big red flag right there. My fiancee has never asked for any money. (By the way, it was the same with my ex-wife (from Russia).) Even when I offered to pay for all of the expenses for our trip to first meet, she insisted on paying some. Other than that, when I've offered to help her out, she has told me that she would prefer I not send her any money. And she has been struggling lately to pay all of the expenses she's had recently. She has a great deal of pride, and she's very resourceful. This whole thing with your fiancee and money makes me feel very uneasy. As far as this "official state translation agency", I may be wrong, but I don't think there is such a thing. NONE of the documents need an apostille. If your fiance makes any effort at all, the total cost for all necessary translations and certifications should not even approach $100. She knows very well how much train tickets are, and it seems clear that she's not being truthful with you about that. You even wrote about how much you paid for the same trip. She doesn't think that you remember? There are so many red flags flying here, and I really think that you should try to take a step back and ask some hard questions of her and of yourself.

I may be entirely wrong, and I hope that I am. I only have a few snapshots of your relationship.....you have much more data to work with. But, it sure sounds like she's taking you for all she can get, and I would just urge you to be very careful and listen to your gut. If something doesn't feel right.....it probably isn't.

Edited April 7, 2008 by Don E

[Bobalouie 0]

From what you've shared, I have some thoughts that I'll share with you. Is your fiancee working? How was she getting by before you started sending her money? $600/month is alot for the "average" Russian, and she should be living quite well just on that in Ufa. Did she ask you for this money? If so, that was one big red flag right there. My fiancee has never asked for any money. (By the way, it was the same with my ex-wife (from Russia).) Even when I offered to pay for all of the expenses for our trip to first meet, she insisted on paying some. Other than that, when I've offered to help her out, she has told me that she would prefer I not send her any money. And she has been struggling lately to pay all of the expenses she's had recently. She has a great deal of pride, and she's very resourceful. This whole thing with your fiancee and money makes me feel very uneasy. As far as this "official state translation agency", I may be wrong, but I don't think there is such a thing. NONE of the documents need an apostille. If your fiance makes any effort at all, the total cost for all necessary translations and certifications should not even approach $100. She knows very well how much train tickets are, and it seems clear that she's not being truthful with you about that. You even wrote about how much you paid for the same trip. She doesn't think that you remember? There are so many red flags flying here, and I really think that you should try to take a step back and ask some hard questions of her and of yourself.

I may be entirely wrong, and I hope that I am. I only have a few snapshots of your relationship.....you have much more data to work with. But, it sure sounds like she's taking you for all she can get, and I would just urge you to be very careful and listen to your gut. If something doesn't feel right.....it probably isn't.

I agree, getting my fiancee to take money from me is like pulling teeth. I offer to help her but she always says that she is ok and doesnt want me to spend my money.

[Igor&Elina 0]

FYI with respect to traveling to Moscow from Ufa, I just did a quick airfare search online and found round trip tickets for two to Moscow from Ufa and back for a total of 8,914.00 Roubles (about $377).

[CARY 0]

https://www.aeroflot.ru/eng/main.aspx

Tell her to fly. Around $300 for 1 adult and 1 child.

[CarolynRitesh 0]

Wow, this is a much more interesting thread than I thought it would be upon first glance at the title!

I spent two years in Kazakstan in the Peace Corps, so this region always holds an interest for me. Jeffrey, thanks for sharing your story - have you posted what it was like to live in Kazan in other threads? I would love to hear your impressions! I see that your local office is Detroit - my hometown, but I have not lived in the area since 94 - is there a large Russian population there now? If so, where?! I am moving back in mid-May and would love to find that community, brush up on my Russian and get some blini!

eekee, when you mentioned Russia not wanting to have any more 'Central Asians' coming in via marriage to Russian spouses, were you talking about the Russian population who after the breakup flocked back to 'Mother Russia' in fear of a loss of power/influence, etc. (many of whom were treated like outsiders and village idiots and some who returned to Central Asia, or are you talking about the actual Kazaks, Turkmen, etc.? I never met any ethnic Kazaks, etc. who had any desire to live in Russia in my two years there, but I did run across ethnic Russians who thought about it or had families in Novosibirsk, etc.

Slim, you always crack me up! From other boards that I am on, I was under the impression that a lot of the Russians in Korea are prostitutes? I'm not trying to denigrate the women or start a flame war, just something I have heard...

To the man with a fiancee in Ufa, I would say be very very careful... I lived in a medium sized town in Kazakstan which may not compare at all to Ufa, and it was from 2002-2004 so prices may have skyrocketed, but I did so on $120 a month, and that was a little above average wages for the local community - and I lived very well. I would imagine the lifestyle you are providing her for $600 a month is uhm, VERY nice. And, if she is making no efforts to learn English and communicate with you, it worries me.

There is actually a pretty active Russian influence here in India, particularly in Goa - it is great to see Russian menus on the restaurant sign-boards. Unfortunately, it seems to be a seedier group that comes here and sets up shop.

In general, I would say that Russian women are amazing - because they are strong, they perservere in the face of adversity, they can be very dedicated to hearth and home no matter the circumstances, and they really hold the family together - at least in Kazakstan! (But like people anywhere, they can have negative qualities and traits.)

[eekee 182]

Non-Russians. In terms of Russian xenophobia, the actual desires and motivations of a group of people are immaterial. A lot of Russian neo-nazis see Koreans as taking university spots from Russians, but in reality they have special spots and are not vying for Russian ones at all. It's also hard to say whether people are there because they went to Russia after the fall or if they came later. Also, "illegal immigration" in Russia can mean just moving to a different city--i.e from a Caucasian republic.

As the whether people from these places actually want to move to Russia--doesn't matter. People can walk around, see construction crews etc. that are mostly non-ethnic russian, and then it's like an invasion.

eekee, when you mentioned Russia not wanting to have any more 'Central Asians' coming in via marriage to Russian spouses, were you talking about the Russian population who after the breakup flocked back to 'Mother Russia' in fear of a loss of power/influence, etc. (many of whom were treated like outsiders and village idiots and some who returned to Central Asia, or are you talking about the actual Kazaks, Turkmen, etc.? I never met any ethnic Kazaks, etc. who had any desire to live in Russia in my two years there, but I did run across ethnic Russians who thought about it or had families in Novosibirsk, etc.

[Ban Hammer 13,659]

this whole thing with the cost of train tickets just sounds - fishy.......

[Gaby&Talbert 1]

So let me get this straight.... it's actually the American guys with the higher standards?

I can't wait to talk this one over around the water cooler. "Mail-order my @$$, there were just no women here up to my high standards. I was forced to look abroad for a woman that would meet all of my expectations."

EXACTLY!

[Gaby&Talbert 1]

I believe the reason for our difficulty certainly stems from the fact that she makes hasty decisions and always portrays a dire need for whatever seems urgent at the moment. The "Official state translation agency" has her convinced that she must translate all of her documents and they all need to be stamped, apistiled, certified, and clad in gold:) They have convinced her that she must have her documents done this way in order for her to receive her visa in Moscow. In other words "they see her coming" and stick her(I mean ME) with the maximum price available. She prefers to take their advice over mine because I am only an American man ( I can't possibly know anything about Russia).

After all this time I don't feel that she is a scammer. But, I do feel that she has been spoiled in her previous relationships. I get the feeling that she is unfamiliar with someone telling her to try to conserve money. I guess I should just give her whatever her little heart desires:wacko: (I am being sarcastic of course). I really appreciate all of the input from everyone regarding this matter. Thank you!

You could find a wife like this in the US that will take all your money and expect you to give her everything she wants.

I thought this was about why Russian or women from any other country than USA were amazing. One of the great things about women from other countries is because they are not like American women.

[mox 298]

You could find a wife like this in the US that will take all your money and expect you to give her everything she wants.

I thought this was about why Russian or women from any other country than USA were amazing. One of the great things about women from other countries is because they are not like American women.

I believe the thread was about "Russia girls are amazing." Not about stereotyping an entire gender from a single country.

[eekee 182]

Well... isn't saying that "Russia girls are amazing" stereotyping?

I believe the thread was about "Russia girls are amazing." Not about stereotyping an entire gender from a single country.

[visaveteran1 33]

Uh oh...here we go again!

[CarolynRitesh 0]

Please don't derail this thread with stories of how awful American women are - this is really an interesting thread! (Even if we are not all awful!!)