APRIL '08 Vermont K-1 Filers

[Fernanda O. 0]

I´ll tell you my point of view, if that helps. I´m the beneficiary and I´m from Brazil. Brazil has lots of problems and America might be a a better place to live in many ways. Lots of brazilians move to the US looking for a better life, and lots of brazilians do the marriage thing for a GC (though the most commom situation is actually paying somebody for marrying them).

But those are usually people who had a hard time in Brazil. I have a bachelor degree (my fiance doesn´t), a wonderful family, lifetime friends, and a comfortable life, a lot more comfortable than I´ll have with Joey on the beggining.

I think in Orlando I´ll be able to get a good salary quicker than I would in Brazil (being just out of school), but I wouldn´t think of moving away from all I know, my country, my parents, my friends, my language, for that.

I wouldn´t give up the dream of living 5 minutes away from my parents and having them see my children anytime they want. I wouldn´t give up walking on the beach with my mom everyday. I wouldn´t give up having my kids go to the same school I went to. I wouldn´t give up having a maid (hahahaha, I know, shallow, but common and cheap in Brazil and hard to get used to not having them). I wouldn´t take the risk of my kids not speaking portuguese and thinking about Brazil as a far away thing. I wouldn´t give up the afternoons laughing and enjoying the intimacy of a lifetime of friendship with my girfriends cause of a little more money. I wouldn´t give up knowing my best friend will be with me in 10 minutes, even if it is 4am if I need her to. I would´t give up my window with a beach view. I would give up brazilian barbecue, beaches, underwear, people, lifestyle, food, night outs, for living in America. I wouldn´t move to a country where people ask me if Brazil is in Africa... or Europe... or don´t even ask, even though they don´t know. I wouldn´t move to a country where most people don´t care about learning about my culture. I wouldn´t cry so very often just thinking of the possibility of never making such good friends as I have here. I wouldn´t be scared with possibilty that my parents are denied a tourist visa to see me. I wouldn´t be scared with the thought that if I ever break up with Joey, I´ll have nothing. I wouldn´t try so hard to move to a country that obviously wish I woulnd´t. I wouldn´t go through that stupid K1 process. I wouldn´t be scared to death when people are rude to me on the embassy. In fact, I wouldn´t take it. I wouldn´t give up family lunches on sundays. I wouldn´t give up calling America a imperialist ###### (hahahahahahah just kidding). I wouldn´t go somewhere I have nothing but ONE person, when here I have everything.

I could go on and on about things I wouldn´t do if it wasn´t for Joey.

I´m sure all the other foreign fiancees will have a list of things they´re not happy to leave, from people they love to everyday silly things that do make a difference.

So if we ever hear anybody say we´re after a GC, we can kick their butt!!!!

I´m sure there have being people who married a GC... But I think the risk the us citizen is taking is as big as the risk the foreign is taking, leaving everything behing.

[KimandRuss 0]

I know how irritating that whole line of reasoning can be. I feel like some dp it out of ignorance while they truly care for you and some just to feel superior and hear themselves talk. I think we must remember that we live in a country where we've now been bombarded with the idea that no matter how irrational and unfounded your opinion may be it carries as much weight as reality. We now call that "fair and balanced", whereas it was formerly called "insanity." So many people seem to now feel that asserting ignorant positions as fact is the right thing to do.

I always feel like getting upset is just what they want from me, so I try to do my best to stay calm and not give them the treat they seek. Not that I always accomplish that! Sometimes it is just too much! When someone is attempting to trigger you, it is good to practice a response ahead of time and be prepared. To them it is a game and they have practiced. You should practice as well!

My strategy is to first admit the truth in what they say. "Marriage fraud is a significant issue. One must be very careful...and I was." Then I offer some facts (which you could research about your particular country). Chinese women in America have about the lowest divorce rate of any other group and that statistic contains a majority of new immigrant wives. So, you may wish to marry an American, that's fine, but the chances that your marriage will fail are much greater than mine... if you really want to talk about risks. Then to pretty much end the conversation, "I'm not sure what you know specifically about my fiancee, but please if you know something about her that I don't, I'm all ears."

That is usually followed by red cheeks and a reply that starts with a stammering, "Well, well, well I..." If I'm feeling generous I will let them stammer. If not I will add, "No really, did she try to use you to get a green card? You must tell me!" That usually brings the admission that they know nothing about my fiancee specifically, to which I can say, "Oh so this was a psychic reading you were giving me. You should have said so up front. Really, if I want a psychic reading I'll ask you! At this point you must make your biggest and phoniest smile, then casually move on to the next topic while the psychic reader licks their wounds.

Try it! It's fun.

[KimandRuss 0]

I´ll tell you my point of view, if that helps. I´m the beneficiary and I´m from Brazil. Brazil has lots of problems and America might be a a better place to live in many ways. Lots of brazilians move to the US looking for a better life, and lots of brazilians do the marriage thing for a GC (though the most commom situation is actually paying somebody for marrying them).

But those are usually people who had a hard time in Brazil. I have a bachelor degree (my fiance doesn´t), a wonderful family, lifetime friends, and a comfortable life, a lot more comfortable than I´ll have with Joey on the beggining.

I think in Orlando I´ll be able to get a good salary quicker than I would in Brazil (being just out of school), but I wouldn´t think of moving away from all I know, my country, my parents, my friends, my language, for that.

I wouldn´t give up the dream of living 5 minutes away from my parents and having them see my children anytime they want. I wouldn´t give up walking on the beach with my mom everyday. I wouldn´t give up having my kids go to the same school I went to. I wouldn´t give up having a maid (hahahaha, I know, shallow, but common and cheap in Brazil and hard to get used to not having them). I wouldn´t take the risk of my kids not speaking portuguese and thinking about Brazil as a far away thing. I wouldn´t give up the afternoons laughing and enjoying the intimacy of a lifetime of friendship with my girfriends cause of a little more money. I wouldn´t give up knowing my best friend will be with me in 10 minutes, even if it is 4am if I need her to. I would´t give up my window with a beach view. I would give up brazilian barbecue, beaches, underwear, people, lifestyle, food, night outs, for living in America. I wouldn´t move to a country where people ask me if Brazil is in Africa... or Europe... or don´t even ask, even though they don´t know. I wouldn´t move to a country where most people don´t care about learning about my culture. I wouldn´t cry so very often just thinking of the possibility of never making such good friends as I have here. I wouldn´t be scared with possibilty that my parents are denied a tourist visa to see me. I wouldn´t be scared with the thought that if I ever break up with Joey, I´ll have nothing. I wouldn´t try so hard to move to a country that obviously wish I woulnd´t. I wouldn´t go through that stupid K1 process. I wouldn´t be scared to death when people are rude to me on the embassy. In fact, I wouldn´t take it. I wouldn´t give up family lunches on sundays. I wouldn´t give up calling America a imperialist ###### (hahahahahahah just kidding). I wouldn´t go somewhere I have nothing but ONE person, when here I have everything.

I could go on and on about things I wouldn´t do if it wasn´t for Joey.

I´m sure all the other foreign fiancees will have a list of things they´re not happy to leave, from people they love to everyday silly things that do make a difference.

So if we ever hear anybody say we´re after a GC, we can kick their butt!!!!

I´m sure there have being people who married a GC... But I think the risk the us citizen is taking is as big as the risk the foreign is taking, leaving everything behing.

Fernanda.. my life here in America sounds a lot like your life there in Brazil. I'm sorry you will missing all of that... I can only imagine how difficult that will be for you. This is the main reason Russell is moving here but we honestly hope to live in both Countries at some stage. Maybe that will be an option sometime in the future for you as well.

btw.. I know where Brazil is.

Once you've become acclimated to the US, I think you'll find that we're not all imperialist ####. You will make some good friends, i'm sure.

[HighwayStar 0]

Fernanda's post moved me quite a bit... To be perfectly honest, if I may say so, I even felt a bit envious. I really wish I could feel the same about my own country, instead of looking forward to leaving everything behind as I am. The only thing I will probably miss is my hometown of Rome... As noisy, crowded and messed up as it is, I love it to death, and it is the only place in Italy where I would live (I did live elsewhere, in a smaller town, and I swore to myself, never again).

As I wrote some time ago, here I have almost nothing left. I live in a very big flat which used to be my family home, and now is full of memories of a life that is gone forever. My brother has cut me off because of his wife's meddling, and I haven't seen or heard from them for over four months (they live in Rome too). As much as I resent the whole visa process, I know it is nothing in comparison to other things that have happened to me in the past. However, I really wish I would feel a little bit like Fernanda does... I wish I had at least one lifetime friend to leave behind, or some family member younger than 81. That makes me feel like such a failure... I will be 48 next December, and will probably leave nothing behind me. Sometimes I wonder what Michael sees in me that no one else did... I wonder if one day he won't open his eyes and realise he made a mistake.

Sorry for being so morbid, but sometimes it all gets a bit too much... I hope you understand.

[Big Papa Zone 93]

Fernanda's post moved me quite a bit... To be perfectly honest, if I may say so, I even felt a bit envious. I really wish I could feel the same about my own country, instead of looking forward to leaving everything behind as I am. The only thing I will probably miss is my hometown of Rome... As noisy, crowded and messed up as it is, I love it to death, and it is the only place in Italy where I would live (I did live elsewhere, in a smaller town, and I swore to myself, never again).

As I wrote some time ago, here I have almost nothing left. I live in a very big flat which used to be my family home, and now is full of memories of a life that is gone forever. My brother has cut me off because of his wife's meddling, and I haven't seen or heard from them for over four months (they live in Rome too). As much as I resent the whole visa process, I know it is nothing in comparison to other things that have happened to me in the past. However, I really wish I would feel a little bit like Fernanda does... I wish I had at least one lifetime friend to leave behind, or some family member younger than 81. That makes me feel like such a failure... I will be 48 next December, and will probably leave nothing behind me. Sometimes I wonder what Michael sees in me that no one else did... I wonder if one day he won't open his eyes and realise he made a mistake.

Sorry for being so morbid, but sometimes it all gets a bit too much... I hope you understand.

Raffaella, you really shouldn't be so hard on yourself: not everyone comes from a picture postcard backround. You think you're the only one that comes from a disfucntional family!!?? Trust me, my situation is markedly similar to yours. You're not a failure. I'd bet my bottom dollar that you've been totally your own person all your life, have never "followed the crowd" just to fit in. That can leave you pretty isolated at times, but that's a damn site better than selling yourself out just to aspire to tbe he kind of social animal you sometimes think you should be. But you don't sell yourself out - you're true to you. Perhaps Michael can see that too. And perhaps he's drawn to you for just that reason. Ever thought about that?

The overtly social lifestyle isn't for everyone. And there's nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all. Sporting events aside, give me the quiet life any day of the week.

Erm, that's it really!!

Chin up, girl!!!

[Wei&Shu(Joe) 2]

Fernanda's post moved me quite a bit... To be perfectly honest, if I may say so, I even felt a bit envious. I really wish I could feel the same about my own country, instead of looking forward to leaving everything behind as I am. The only thing I will probably miss is my hometown of Rome... As noisy, crowded and messed up as it is, I love it to death, and it is the only place in Italy where I would live (I did live elsewhere, in a smaller town, and I swore to myself, never again).

As I wrote some time ago, here I have almost nothing left. I live in a very big flat which used to be my family home, and now is full of memories of a life that is gone forever. My brother has cut me off because of his wife's meddling, and I haven't seen or heard from them for over four months (they live in Rome too). As much as I resent the whole visa process, I know it is nothing in comparison to other things that have happened to me in the past. However, I really wish I would feel a little bit like Fernanda does... I wish I had at least one lifetime friend to leave behind, or some family member younger than 81. That makes me feel like such a failure... I will be 48 next December, and will probably leave nothing behind me. Sometimes I wonder what Michael sees in me that no one else did... I wonder if one day he won't open his eyes and realise he made a mistake.

Sorry for being so morbid, but sometimes it all gets a bit too much... I hope you understand.

Highway, may I call you highway? Your story is very sad in some ways. I want to tell you that many times I have had the opportunity to have someone come up to me in the grocery store and say, "Remember me? You were my doctor when I was a kid and one day you said to me (fill in the blank) and I've never forgotten it. It really helped me get my life together."

Most of the time it was something that I didn't think was so profound. Sometimes, it was just that I was the first adult who listened and respected them. I think I have been very lucky to have these experiences and I firmly believe that we all touch people like this sometimes, but often we never get the feedback. Little things can make a big difference. Some child you passed in Roma one day may have seen their first happy, smiling adult face stuck to the front of your head and thought, "Maybe the world isn't as ugly as it seems at home. Maybe there is hope for the future." Some little kindness may have changed someone's life forever.

As humans, our limited access to data (feedback) can easily lead us to draw incorrect conclusions. Our vision is very limited at times and we fail to see the truth of what we have contributed to the world. We may think we see failure but we don't know how far the effects of our small actions may have traveled.

So remember all the small things, the kind words, the helping hand, the respect you've shown to people who feel oppressed, and on and on. Remember that all these things have had effects far from you, that you may never know about. You put them out there into the world and your kindness and compassion spread. I'm not unique. I'm just lucky to have heard from some of these people and I'm just here to tell you that your little actions have been no less powerful than mine.

Your neck gets tired fast when you hang "failure" around it. It isn't true so let that go and give yourself the credit you deserve.

[daboyz 36]

Fernanda's post moved me quite a bit... To be perfectly honest, if I may say so, I even felt a bit envious. I really wish I could feel the same about my own country, instead of looking forward to leaving everything behind as I am. The only thing I will probably miss is my hometown of Rome... As noisy, crowded and messed up as it is, I love it to death, and it is the only place in Italy where I would live (I did live elsewhere, in a smaller town, and I swore to myself, never again).

As I wrote some time ago, here I have almost nothing left. I live in a very big flat which used to be my family home, and now is full of memories of a life that is gone forever. My brother has cut me off because of his wife's meddling, and I haven't seen or heard from them for over four months (they live in Rome too). As much as I resent the whole visa process, I know it is nothing in comparison to other things that have happened to me in the past. However, I really wish I would feel a little bit like Fernanda does... I wish I had at least one lifetime friend to leave behind, or some family member younger than 81. That makes me feel like such a failure... I will be 48 next December, and will probably leave nothing behind me. Sometimes I wonder what Michael sees in me that no one else did... I wonder if one day he won't open his eyes and realise he made a mistake.

Sorry for being so morbid, but sometimes it all gets a bit too much... I hope you understand.

Highway, may I call you highway? Your story is very sad in some ways. I want to tell you that many times I have had the opportunity to have someone come up to me in the grocery store and say, "Remember me? You were my doctor when I was a kid and one day you said to me (fill in the blank) and I've never forgotten it. It really helped me get my life together."

Most of the time it was something that I didn't think was so profound. Sometimes, it was just that I was the first adult who listened and respected them. I think I have been very lucky to have these experiences and I firmly believe that we all touch people like this sometimes, but often we never get the feedback. Little things can make a big difference. Some child you passed in Roma one day may have seen their first happy, smiling adult face stuck to the front of your head and thought, "Maybe the world isn't as ugly as it seems at home. Maybe there is hope for the future." Some little kindness may have changed someone's life forever.

As humans, our limited access to data (feedback) can easily lead us to draw incorrect conclusions. Our vision is very limited at times and we fail to see the truth of what we have contributed to the world. We may think we see failure but we don't know how far the effects of our small actions may have traveled.

So remember all the small things, the kind words, the helping hand, the respect you've shown to people who feel oppressed, and on and on. Remember that all these things have had effects far from you, that you may never know about. You put them out there into the world and your kindness and compassion spread. I'm not unique. I'm just lucky to have heard from some of these people and I'm just here to tell you that your little actions have been no less powerful than mine.

Your neck gets tired fast when you hang "failure" around it. It isn't true so let that go and give yourself the credit you deserve.

nice post!

[Wei&Shu(Joe) 2]

Here is the rundown on Igor's list going into the week of August 11...

(at least up to my spot at 65, sorry to be so selfish)

#2 repeat, subtract 1

#5 approved already, subtract 2

#22 very sad...pregnant, broke up, she is withdrawing petition ,subtract 3

#28 didn't indicate service center in profile, is posting in CSC forum, I think it's a CSC case, subtract 4

#42 duplicate, subtract 5

#44 "Russ & Kim", pornography related delays

#48 Gaura & Nitai, already approved, subtract 6

#50 Suzy & Luis, VSC awaiting nude photos of Peruvian supermodel "Luis"

#56 Want to know what slows things down? Professional petitioners maybe? This person wonders if he'll have any trouble...applied for K1 in 2006, approved but he was unhappy with product on delivery and returned to sender. Applied for same person Jan 2007 had interview appt in June, canceled 2 weeks before interview because he had decided to "date" someone else Apparently the product quality had not improved in the intervening 6 months! Now applying for her a third time! My my, what will happen this time?! Anyone else who has been through this situation please run over and tell him what to expect!

Did someone say something about dysfunction? Of course, you can see this is a new paragraph so the question has nothing to do with anything written above!

[catknit 144]

Joe - Wow - some of this reads like a freaking soap opera! On a side note, duplicates drive me nuts....

Kim, taking a looksee at igor's list once again I noticed that 2 4/23 dated peeps are approved and then, well, there's us. I hope the adjudicator had a wonderful and restful vaca and will be back in an approving mood!!! [notice I'm still holding onto the vacation theory]

I've been bouncing back and forth in the #43 and #44 spot for days and couldn't figure it out. But I guess when new people add in timelines you can move backward.

And to end, sort of after the point, about the whole being used for a green card thing. I usually look whomever in the eye and say "yes he is, and I'm just using him for the sex". That usually quiets them down. Then again most people who are acquaintences of mine would never think a comment like that would ever come out of my mouth so it's totally disarming to them.

[Wei&Shu(Joe) 2]

Joe - Wow - some of this reads like a freaking soap opera! On a side note, duplicates drive me nuts....

Kim, taking a looksee at igor's list once again I noticed that 2 4/23 dated peeps are approved and then, well, there's us. I hope the adjudicator had a wonderful and restful vaca and will be back in an approving mood!!! [notice I'm still holding onto the vacation theory]

I've been bouncing back and forth in the #43 and #44 spot for days and couldn't figure it out. But I guess when new people add in timelines you can move backward.

And to end, sort of after the point, about the whole being used for a green card thing. I usually look whomever in the eye and say "yes he is, and I'm just using him for the sex". That usually quiets them down. Then again most people who are acquaintences of mine would never think a comment like that would ever come out of my mouth so it's totally disarming to them.

Great response! Based on the country listed for your fiance you might want to lift an eyebrow at the end and say "Kama Sutra!" very loudly! Maybe tell them you are just up to the chapter on biting, so you need to bring him here to finish. It's a long book! Namaste!

[KimandRuss 0]

What lovely responses! I couldn't agree more.

#44 "Russ & Kim", pornography related delays

omg!

#56 Want to know what slows things down? Professional petitioners maybe? This person wonders if he'll have any trouble...applied for K1 in 2006, approved but he was unhappy with product on delivery and returned to sender. Applied for same person Jan 2007 had interview appt in June, canceled 2 weeks before interview because he had decided to "date" someone else Apparently the product quality had not improved in the intervening 6 months! Now applying for her a third time! My my, what will happen this time?! Anyone else who has been through this situation please run over and tell him what to expect!

good God! wth is wrong with people!?!

Thanks for the update Joe!

Kim, taking a looksee at igor's list once again I noticed that 2 4/23 dated peeps are approved and then, well, there's us. I hope the adjudicator had a wonderful and restful vaca and will be back in an approving mood!!! [notice I'm still holding onto the vacation theory

Hi Milo! I was mistaken the other day ..what Russell told me was that about half of the 4/23 NOA1's have been approved...forgot how many there were. I'm still with you on the vacation theory... guess we'll find out soon.

And to end, sort of after the point, about the whole being used for a green card thing. I usually look whomever in the eye and say "yes he is, and I'm just using him for the sex". That usually quiets them down. Then again most people who are acquaintences of mine would never think a comment like that would ever come out of my mouth so it's totally disarming to them.

thata girl! There is certainly something to be said about shock value!

Great response! Based on the country listed for your fiance you might want to lift an eyebrow at the end and say "Kama Sutra!" very loudly! Maybe tell them you are just up to the chapter on biting, so you need to bring him here to finish. It's a long book! Namaste!

you are a nut!

[jer 08 0]

Here is the rundown on Igor's list going into the week of August 11...

(at least up to my spot at 65, sorry to be so selfish)

#2 repeat, subtract 1

#5 approved already, subtract 2

#22 very sad...pregnant, broke up, she is withdrawing petition ,subtract 3

#28 didn't indicate service center in profile, is posting in CSC forum, I think it's a CSC case, subtract 4

#42 duplicate, subtract 5

#44 "Russ & Kim", pornography related delays

#48 Gaura & Nitai, already approved, subtract 6

#50 Suzy & Luis, VSC awaiting nude photos of Peruvian supermodel "Luis"

#56 Want to know what slows things down? Professional petitioners maybe? This person wonders if he'll have any trouble...applied for K1 in 2006, approved but he was unhappy with product on delivery and returned to sender. Applied for same person Jan 2007 had interview appt in June, canceled 2 weeks before interview because he had decided to "date" someone else Apparently the product quality had not improved in the intervening 6 months! Now applying for her a third time! My my, what will happen this time?! Anyone else who has been through this situation please run over and tell him what to expect!

Did someone say something about dysfunction? Of course, you can see this is a new paragraph so the question has nothing to do with anything written above!

Hey china it wasn`t me applying for her, it was someone else. I wouldn`t go through this process more than once.

[KimandRuss 0]

oooops!

[Wei&Shu(Joe) 2]

Here is the rundown on Igor's list going into the week of August 11...

(at least up to my spot at 65, sorry to be so selfish)

#2 repeat, subtract 1

#5 approved already, subtract 2

#22 very sad...pregnant, broke up, she is withdrawing petition ,subtract 3

#28 didn't indicate service center in profile, is posting in CSC forum, I think it's a CSC case, subtract 4

#42 duplicate, subtract 5

#44 "Russ & Kim", pornography related delays

#48 Gaura & Nitai, already approved, subtract 6

#50 Suzy & Luis, VSC awaiting nude photos of Peruvian supermodel "Luis"

#56 Want to know what slows things down? Professional petitioners maybe? This person wonders if he'll have any trouble...applied for K1 in 2006, approved but he was unhappy with product on delivery and returned to sender. Applied for same person Jan 2007 had interview appt in June, canceled 2 weeks before interview because he had decided to "date" someone else Apparently the product quality had not improved in the intervening 6 months! Now applying for her a third time! My my, what will happen this time?! Anyone else who has been through this situation please run over and tell him what to expect!

Did someone say something about dysfunction? Of course, you can see this is a new paragraph so the question has nothing to do with anything written above!

Hey china it wasn`t me applying for her, it was someone else. I wouldn`t go through this process more than once.

Sorry dude! I hope it's all figured out now. Sorry for misunderstanding your post! Hope you have a smooth ride.

[Susita 175]

Here is the rundown on Igor's list going into the week of August 11...

(at least up to my spot at 65, sorry to be so selfish)

#2 repeat, subtract 1

#5 approved already, subtract 2

#22 very sad...pregnant, broke up, she is withdrawing petition ,subtract 3

#28 didn't indicate service center in profile, is posting in CSC forum, I think it's a CSC case, subtract 4

#42 duplicate, subtract 5

#44 "Russ & Kim", pornography related delays

#48 Gaura & Nitai, already approved, subtract 6

#50 Suzy & Luis, VSC awaiting nude photos of Peruvian supermodel "Luis"

#56 Want to know what slows things down? Professional petitioners maybe? This person wonders if he'll have any trouble...applied for K1 in 2006, approved but he was unhappy with product on delivery and returned to sender. Applied for same person Jan 2007 had interview appt in June, canceled 2 weeks before interview because he had decided to "date" someone else Apparently the product quality had not improved in the intervening 6 months! Now applying for her a third time! My my, what will happen this time?! Anyone else who has been through this situation please run over and tell him what to expect!

Did someone say something about dysfunction? Of course, you can see this is a new paragraph so the question has nothing to do with anything written above!

hahahhahaha