MENA-One Visa Journey For the Book

[morocco4ever 63]

I think we hear too much gloom and doom, and that everyone is being used for a green card. I highly doubt that she is totally unaware of this or she wouldn't be having this issue to begin with. I read over and over again from Wahrania that everyone is being used but her.

Olivia, yes it is a fact that some are used, but there are alot of people in real relationships. Don't judge your relationship on the over zealous opinions of gloom and doomers. Rather look at your relationship as it is.

I am married to a Moroccan, and have been now for over 3 years. We are in one of those relationships that everyone said was for a visa, and it is of the opinion here that most Moroccans on con artists.

My husband could very easily get up and leave me now. He could remain in the US and he could get his citizenship without any more assistance from me. He has friends and family that live here in the US, where to go isn't a barrier. So why, when he could have it all now, doesn't he leave me? Plain and simple, we are in love. If I had listened to what everyone had to say about my relationship I would have dumped his A$$ a long time ago. Instead I stepped back and looked at my relationship from a third party point of view. Is is an unusual union? Most definately! In all appearances would someone assume it was for a visa only? Certainly! So why didn't I run? I can see his love and dedication. I can see, after he has been here over a year that I always have been, and always will be his life. He has never shown me anything different. And from a third party point of view there is no doubt it is real.

This is what I am saying. It doesn't hurt to be aware of the possibilities, but don't let it rule your decisions. Don't let the opinions sway you to always believe the worst, find out for yourself.

Morocco 4 ever...I was USED before..I was battered,threatened,drug by my hair and punched in the street in the face and have an order of protection STILL against a palestinian who brought women to my bed when I was at work and threatened to take equity from my house when I wouldnt AOS with him....You have not seen the ugly side of this.Just jackie and I have.....voices of dissent are NECESSARY

So does that qualify all of us as being used?

Edited March 25, 2008 by morocco4ever

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Please no one bash me, but I must admit that I am guilty by association, my cousin wanted to avoid the militiary so he came to the US and used a woman for green card. I was only 9 at the time, but I remember that the signs were there she was so in love that she ignored it. My family knew what he was doing, and it was like nothing to them, they played along with. So yes this is common.

Follow your hearts ladys, us woman have amazing instincts, but sometimes we allow our hearts to over-ride our instincts. If it feels wrong-it propably is.

I'm interested to hear how your family feels about your current relationship given their prior involvement in your cousin's green card fraud.

jenn,they feel Americans arent human beings and put on thid planet to be used......

how can u keep speaking for everyone? THey who? did you know these people i guess im just not getting it , does the whole culture think the same and apparently you know most of them

[morocco4ever 63]

Please no one bash me, but I must admit that I am guilty by association, my cousin wanted to avoid the militiary so he came to the US and used a woman for green card. I was only 9 at the time, but I remember that the signs were there she was so in love that she ignored it. My family knew what he was doing, and it was like nothing to them, they played along with. So yes this is common.

Follow your hearts ladys, us woman have amazing instincts, but sometimes we allow our hearts to over-ride our instincts. If it feels wrong-it propably is.

I'm interested to hear how your family feels about your current relationship given their prior involvement in your cousin's green card fraud.

jenn,they feel Americans arent human beings and put on thid planet to be used......

how can u keep speaking for everyone? THey who? did you know these people i guess im just not getting it , does the whole culture think the same and apparently you know most of them

This is my issue. You can't speak for an entire culture based on some.

[ya falaha! 0]

I don't think it's necessarily that they think Americans aren't humans but I do think that *some* view us as privileged and that we should share the wealth. Extreme poverty can make one an opportunist real easily. It may also go hand in hand with the idea that Western women are loose, whorish, not to be trusted, etc. Why would anyone show real loyalty to someone they could never trust? To some we are disposable, a means to an end. Mind you I'm not talking about the majority of MENA but it does happen and some ppl from this region do have this attitude.

Edited March 25, 2008 by moody

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

I don't think it's necessarily that they think Americans aren't humans but I do think that *some* view us as privileged and that we should share the wealth. Extreme poverty can make one an opportunist real easily. It may also go hand in hand with the idea that Western women are loose, whorish, not to be trusted, etc. Why would anyone show real loyalty to someone they could never trust? Mind you I'm not talking about the majority of MENA but it does happen and some ppl from this region do have this attitude.

Exactly Moody,if you can dehumanise someone,it becomes easier to victimise them

I think we hear too much gloom and doom, and that everyone is being used for a green card. I highly doubt that she is totally unaware of this or she wouldn't be having this issue to begin with. I read over and over again from Wahrania that everyone is being used but her.

Olivia, yes it is a fact that some are used, but there are alot of people in real relationships. Don't judge your relationship on the over zealous opinions of gloom and doomers. Rather look at your relationship as it is.

I am married to a Moroccan, and have been now for over 3 years. We are in one of those relationships that everyone said was for a visa, and it is of the opinion here that most Moroccans on con artists.

My husband could very easily get up and leave me now. He could remain in the US and he could get his citizenship without any more assistance from me. He has friends and family that live here in the US, where to go isn't a barrier. So why, when he could have it all now, doesn't he leave me? Plain and simple, we are in love. If I had listened to what everyone had to say about my relationship I would have dumped his A$$ a long time ago. Instead I stepped back and looked at my relationship from a third party point of view. Is is an unusual union? Most definately! In all appearances would someone assume it was for a visa only? Certainly! So why didn't I run? I can see his love and dedication. I can see, after he has been here over a year that I always have been, and always will be his life. He has never shown me anything different. And from a third party point of view there is no doubt it is real.

This is what I am saying. It doesn't hurt to be aware of the possibilities, but don't let it rule your decisions. Don't let the opinions sway you to always believe the worst, find out for yourself.

Morocco 4 ever...I was USED before..I was battered,threatened,drug by my hair and punched in the street in the face and have an order of protection STILL against a palestinian who brought women to my bed when I was at work and threatened to take equity from my house when I wouldnt AOS with him....You have not seen the ugly side of this.Just jackie and I have.....voices of dissent are NECESSARY

So does that qualify all of us as being used?

NO NO AND NO NO NO

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

I don't think it's necessarily that they think Americans aren't humans but I do think that *some* view us as privileged and that we should share the wealth. Extreme poverty can make one an opportunist real easily. It may also go hand in hand with the idea that Western women are loose, whorish, not to be trusted, etc. Why would anyone show real loyalty to someone they could never trust? To some we are disposable, a means to an end. Mind you I'm not talking about the majority of MENA but it does happen and some ppl from this region do have this attitude.

compared to a girl who cant leave her house without an escort....loose is an understatement...

We also are able to drive around freely,take jobs we want and we are essentially equal to men in our culture(well sort of)

Where did you come up with this opinion Moody and how?

[nana_356 0]

Wharania, it isnt fair to say "they" There are many good hearted MENA, with open minds and open hearts. I have read many of your posts, and you sound like such a negative person. My goodness! Every culture has its good and bad. I am sharing my personal experience because I am also a woman that wants what many other woman on this forum want, family,companionship and happiness. So I decided to dangerously open myself up to critisizem, but also to questions. There are not many Middle eastern woman that will openly speak on this, so I am

I did not post my comment for people catogorize all arabs as american hating, green card sucking vultures!

[ya falaha! 0]

I've come up with this opinion because I've dealt with Arabs for several years and sadly I've heard these types of things with my own ears. Men calling women "bitches" for no reason other than they are American. Just utter disrespect based on stereotypical ####### that they've learned. Americans aren't the only ones filled with stereotypical BS.

Again, not the majority but sad nonetheless.

Edited March 25, 2008 by moody

[SaadBell 0]

This is to lighten the mood, but, being an avid reader of true crimes, I love to read the most horrific ones, and the ones that I used to share with my ex-husband, I think sharing is important in a relationship. I still like to share with my now husband, here is a few of my favorite bed time stories, so if they are up to no good, they will at least think really hard about just using me.

Katherine Mary Knight was not the first person to skin and eat her lover. A long line of killer-cannibals preceded her. I like to read the part about the police finding the whole thing, she had set the table for dinner, and had him as the main dish. That will make anybody think hard

Mary Ann Cotton is another wonderful evening read, Murdered between 15-21 of her close relatives by arsenic poisoning. Why? For money, personal dislike or they got in her way over something she wanted. Arsenic poisoning is not a good way to die. Green card darling, why of course, let me get you some tea my one and only!!!!!!!

[brnidokiegurl 0]

I would think if u go to any other region, say Italy, China etc they will each have a view and/or opinion of us as americans, based on maybe some they knew once, the media etc and prob we do the same here to others.....this is life, opinions are just that opinions. I may know a man(or woman) from xxx culture, i see him as my best friend always there to help me etc, you may see this man from xxx as stupid, worthless, cheats etc because he is xxx but do you know him for who he is, generalizing, what others have told you of people from xxx or is everyone from xxx this bad, im afraid its one of those never ending stories with no answers, in a perfect world..............

[Jenn! 918]

This is to lighten the mood, but, being an avid reader of true crimes, I love to read the most horrific ones, and the ones that I used to share with my ex-husband, I think sharing is important in a relationship. I still like to share with my now husband, here is a few of my favorite bed time stories, so if they are up to no good, they will at least think really hard about just using me.

Katherine Mary Knight was not the first person to skin and eat her lover. A long line of killer-cannibals preceded her. I like to read the part about the police finding the whole thing, she had set the table for dinner, and had him as the main dish. That will make anybody think hard

Mary Ann Cotton is another wonderful evening read, Murdered between 15-21 of her close relatives by arsenic poisoning. Why? For money, personal dislike or they got in her way over something she wanted. Arsenic poisoning is not a good way to die. Green card darling, why of course, let me get you some tea my one and only!!!!!!!

What a refreshing change of topic!

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Wharania, it isnt fair to say "they" There are many good hearted MENA, with open minds and open hearts. I have read many of your posts, and you sound like such a negative person. My goodness! Every culture has its good and bad. I am sharing my personal experience because I am also a woman that wants what many other woman on this forum want, family,companionship and happiness. So I decided to dangerously open myself up to critisizem, but also to questions. There are not many Middle eastern woman that will openly speak on this, so I am

I did not post my comment for people catogorize all arabs as american hating, green card sucking vultures!

YOU JUST SAID YOUR COUSIN VICTIMISED AN AMERICAN AND YOUR FAMILY WAS IN ON IT>>>

WHAT?

I am negative?

No one says all people are like this...but you have just laid out something that a member of your family did to an American.Where is the outrage?

This is why there is hellish APs for innocent people and your cousin should be deported.Shame on the people in your family that advocated this garbage and get off your hypocritical high horse...Your family victimised an American and your cousin commited a crime

[morocco4ever 63]

I don't think it's necessarily that they think Americans aren't humans but I do think that *some* view us as privileged and that we should share the wealth. Extreme poverty can make one an opportunist real easily. It may also go hand in hand with the idea that Western women are loose, whorish, not to be trusted, etc. Why would anyone show real loyalty to someone they could never trust? To some we are disposable, a means to an end. Mind you I'm not talking about the majority of MENA but it does happen and some ppl from this region do have this attitude.

Again Moody you hit the nail on the head. *Some* But what has been stressed here time and time again that this can be true for all cultures, not just MENA. My ex is a prime example. He feels the world owes him, and he doesn't care who he uses and who he takes down in the process. He is American.

My in laws are wonderful. They have told me that they had an idea of what a western woman was like, and that I came and showed them another side that they didn't know about. Isn't this what it is about? We have been told, we have heard, we have been warned............. But what it really boils down to is what a person, not a culture, is capable of doing. Why are we forming so many negative opinions on some really wonderful people?

[brnidokiegurl 0]

This is to lighten the mood, but, being an avid reader of true crimes, I love to read the most horrific ones, and the ones that I used to share with my ex-husband, I think sharing is important in a relationship. I still like to share with my now husband, here is a few of my favorite bed time stories, so if they are up to no good, they will at least think really hard about just using me.

Katherine Mary Knight was not the first person to skin and eat her lover. A long line of killer-cannibals preceded her. I like to read the part about the police finding the whole thing, she had set the table for dinner, and had him as the main dish. That will make anybody think hard

Mary Ann Cotton is another wonderful evening read, Murdered between 15-21 of her close relatives by arsenic poisoning. Why? For money, personal dislike or they got in her way over something she wanted. Arsenic poisoning is not a good way to die. Green card darling, why of course, let me get you some tea my one and only!!!!!!!

What a refreshing change of topic!

and its almost lunch.......i will admit tho i did educate ahmed who loraina bobbitt was

[morocco4ever 63]

This is to lighten the mood, but, being an avid reader of true crimes, I love to read the most horrific ones, and the ones that I used to share with my ex-husband, I think sharing is important in a relationship. I still like to share with my now husband, here is a few of my favorite bed time stories, so if they are up to no good, they will at least think really hard about just using me.

Katherine Mary Knight was not the first person to skin and eat her lover. A long line of killer-cannibals preceded her. I like to read the part about the police finding the whole thing, she had set the table for dinner, and had him as the main dish. That will make anybody think hard

Mary Ann Cotton is another wonderful evening read, Murdered between 15-21 of her close relatives by arsenic poisoning. Why? For money, personal dislike or they got in her way over something she wanted. Arsenic poisoning is not a good way to die. Green card darling, why of course, let me get you some tea my one and only!!!!!!!

This is to lighten the mood, but, being an avid reader of true crimes, I love to read the most horrific ones, and the ones that I used to share with my ex-husband, I think sharing is important in a relationship. I still like to share with my now husband, here is a few of my favorite bed time stories, so if they are up to no good, they will at least think really hard about just using me.

Katherine Mary Knight was not the first person to skin and eat her lover. A long line of killer-cannibals preceded her. I like to read the part about the police finding the whole thing, she had set the table for dinner, and had him as the main dish. That will make anybody think hard

Mary Ann Cotton is another wonderful evening read, Murdered between 15-21 of her close relatives by arsenic poisoning. Why? For money, personal dislike or they got in her way over something she wanted. Arsenic poisoning is not a good way to die. Green card darling, why of course, let me get you some tea my one and only!!!!!!!

What a refreshing change of topic!

and its almost lunch.......i will admit tho i did educate ahmed who loraina bobbitt was

Do you own a Bobbitt cutlery set too?