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Visa Denial  

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  1. 1. If your SO's visa to live in America was denied, would you then move to their home country?

    • Yes! No question about it.
      45
    • No way. I could never live in that country. Our relationship would be over.
      12
    • Maybe. Explain.
      13
    • We would both move to a third country.
      6
  2. 2. If your relationship would be over because you don't want to leave America, Why?

    • I have kids or family here and cannot leave them.
      7
    • I have a job I don't want to leave.
      5
    • I can't because of health/insurance reasons.
      0
    • I prefer America. Period!
      7
    • N/A ...I would go!
      49
    • Other. Explain.
      8


122 posts in this topic

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Filed: Country: Indonesia
Timeline
Posted

For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

I-130

Jun 28 2004 : Received at NSC

Oct 25 2004 : Transferred to CSC

Oct 29 2004 : Received at CSC

Nov 8 2004 : Received response from CSC that my file is being requested & review will be done

Nov 10 2004 : Email & online status Approved

Nov 15 2004 : NOA 2 in mail

Dec 16 2004 : NVC assigns case number

Dec 20 2004 : NVC sent DS 3032 to beneficiary, copy of DS 3032 & I-864 fee bill to petitioner

Jan 3 2005 : Petitioner received copy of DS 3032 and I-864 fee bill. Post-marked Dec 23rd.

Jan 11 2005 : Beneficiary received DS 3032 in Indonesia

Jan 31 2005 : Sent DS 3032 to NVC

Feb 8, 2005 : NVC received DS 3032

Feb 21, 2005 : IV fee generated

Feb 25, 2005 : Sent I-864 fee bill

Feb 28, 2005 : I-864 fee bill delivered to St Louis

Mar 3, 2005 : IV fee bill received

Mar 7, 2005 : Sent IV fee bill

Mar 9, 2005 : IV fee bill delivered to St Louis

Mar 28, 2005 : I-864 fee credited against case.

April 6, 2005 : Received I-864 package

April 7, 2005 : Immigrant Visa fee credited against case.

April 11, 2005 : DS 230 is generated

Aug 12, 2005 : I-864 & DS 230 received by NVC

Sep 14, 2005 : RFE on I-864

Nov 3, 2005 : Checklist response received at NVC

Nov 25, 2005 : Case completion

Dec 9, 2005 : Police Cert requested from the Netherlands

Jan 12 2006 : Interview success - Approved !!

Jan 19 2006 : Visa & brown envelope picked up

  • Replies 121
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Top Posters In This Topic

Filed: Other Timeline
Posted
For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Russia
Timeline
Posted (edited)

Interesting. I see them as the same. Each chose something that causes physical separation. I don't see one as more noble. Both of these men could love their children very much. Why don't you argue this ship's crew member would be better to quit the sea and work three jobs in town as to see his children?

For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

Edited by Kazan' Tiger

Jeffery AND Alla.

0 kilometers physically separates us!

K-1 Visa Granted... Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Alla ARRIVED to America... Wednesday, 12 November 2008

russia_a.gif Алла и Джеффри USA_a.gif

AllaAndJeffery.PNG

Filed: Other Timeline
Posted

I want some of what you're smoking, Jeffrey.

BECAUSE.....the guy in the example was still married to their mother! The family was not already decimated.

BECAUSE as if it's not enough trauma for the kiddos already that mom and dad are divorced, one of them wants to run off half way around the world in the name of love?

Interesting. I see them as the same. Each chose something that causes physical separation. I don't see one as more noble. Both of these men could love their children very much. Why don't you argue this ship's crew member would be better to quit the sea and work three jobs in town as to see his children?

For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

Filed: Country: Indonesia
Timeline
Posted
For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

Would the impact be the same - children grew up without their dad?

Personally, I think both men make their personal choice (whether it is a career or personal happiness) that require them to be away from their children.

My mother choose to be stay at home mom, my sister choose to be working mom. My dad & my brother in law make enough money to pay the bills. Is my sister a worse parent than my mom because she wanted to have a career & a family?

I-130

Jun 28 2004 : Received at NSC

Oct 25 2004 : Transferred to CSC

Oct 29 2004 : Received at CSC

Nov 8 2004 : Received response from CSC that my file is being requested & review will be done

Nov 10 2004 : Email & online status Approved

Nov 15 2004 : NOA 2 in mail

Dec 16 2004 : NVC assigns case number

Dec 20 2004 : NVC sent DS 3032 to beneficiary, copy of DS 3032 & I-864 fee bill to petitioner

Jan 3 2005 : Petitioner received copy of DS 3032 and I-864 fee bill. Post-marked Dec 23rd.

Jan 11 2005 : Beneficiary received DS 3032 in Indonesia

Jan 31 2005 : Sent DS 3032 to NVC

Feb 8, 2005 : NVC received DS 3032

Feb 21, 2005 : IV fee generated

Feb 25, 2005 : Sent I-864 fee bill

Feb 28, 2005 : I-864 fee bill delivered to St Louis

Mar 3, 2005 : IV fee bill received

Mar 7, 2005 : Sent IV fee bill

Mar 9, 2005 : IV fee bill delivered to St Louis

Mar 28, 2005 : I-864 fee credited against case.

April 6, 2005 : Received I-864 package

April 7, 2005 : Immigrant Visa fee credited against case.

April 11, 2005 : DS 230 is generated

Aug 12, 2005 : I-864 & DS 230 received by NVC

Sep 14, 2005 : RFE on I-864

Nov 3, 2005 : Checklist response received at NVC

Nov 25, 2005 : Case completion

Dec 9, 2005 : Police Cert requested from the Netherlands

Jan 12 2006 : Interview success - Approved !!

Jan 19 2006 : Visa & brown envelope picked up

Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Brazil
Timeline
Posted

I didn't ask you to compare the love, but the importance they have in your life. It seems obvious to me that you're saying your relationship with your fiancee is more important than your relationship with your children. If you're saying something different, please correct me.

Also, I think this is the source of some confusion: do you know what an "ion" is? Look it up.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Russia
Timeline
Posted

My problem is with the second "Because" Who said I would "want" to or to "run"? Did you read my previous post to you?

I want some of what you're smoking, Jeffrey.

BECAUSE.....the guy in the example was still married to their mother! The family was not already decimated.

BECAUSE as if it's not enough trauma for the kiddos already that mom and dad are divorced, one of them wants to run off half way around the world in the name of love?

Interesting. I see them as the same. Each chose something that causes physical separation. I don't see one as more noble. Both of these men could love their children very much. Why don't you argue this ship's crew member would be better to quit the sea and work three jobs in town as to see his children?

For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

Jeffery AND Alla.

0 kilometers physically separates us!

K-1 Visa Granted... Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Alla ARRIVED to America... Wednesday, 12 November 2008

russia_a.gif Алла и Джеффри USA_a.gif

AllaAndJeffery.PNG

Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Brazil
Timeline
Posted
For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

Would the impact be the same - children grew up without their dad?

Personally, I think both men make their personal choice (whether it is a career or personal happiness) that require them to be away from their children.

My mother choose to be stay at home mom, my sister choose to be working mom. My dad & my brother in law make enough money to pay the bills. Is my sister a worse parent than my mom because she wanted to have a career & a family?

No, because the kids would know the dad was doing that because that's what he knew how to do to support them. He'd be doing it out of love for them. It's not the same as the dad choosing to live far from his children because he cares about someone else more.

And a working mom is setting an example for her kids. For me, that made my mom a better mom. (Not saying stay at home moms are doing a disservice to their kids, but for me I appreciated having a working mom.)

I'm not sure its fair that Kazan has become a target on this subject - there are far more women on this site taking their children away from their fathers in order to find love in hte US and I don't see them being asked to explain themselves.

In fact that has been brought up and discussed extensively. It's just that Jeffrey is the only one here defending that particular viewpoint.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Russia
Timeline
Posted

Alex, not only my moral compass but English teacher too. You knew what I was saying. No, I am not saying my relationship with Alla is more important. They are different and cannot be prioritized.

I didn't ask you to compare the love, but the importance they have in your life. It seems obvious to me that you're saying your relationship with your fiancee is more important than your relationship with your children. If you're saying something different, please correct me.

Also, I think this is the source of some confusion: do you know what an "ion" is? Look it up.

Jeffery AND Alla.

0 kilometers physically separates us!

K-1 Visa Granted... Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Alla ARRIVED to America... Wednesday, 12 November 2008

russia_a.gif Алла и Джеффри USA_a.gif

AllaAndJeffery.PNG

Filed: Other Timeline
Posted
I'm not sure its fair that Kazan has become a target on this subject - there are far more women on this site taking their children away from their fathers in order to find love in hte US and I don't see them being asked to explain themselves.

I think that's a fair statement.

Though many (but not all) of the women I see bringing their children here seem to have ex'es who aren't even in the picture at all. Those guys vanished a long time ago.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Russia
Timeline
Posted

For some reason I have been judged as some unloving, uncaring father ready to abandon his children to the wolves to chase some tail half-way across the world. All because I said I would eventually join my fiancée in her country should her visa be denied.

I'm not sure its fair that Kazan has become a target on this subject - there are far more women on this site taking their children away from their fathers in order to find love in hte US and I don't see them being asked to explain themselves.

Jeffery AND Alla.

0 kilometers physically separates us!

K-1 Visa Granted... Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Alla ARRIVED to America... Wednesday, 12 November 2008

russia_a.gif Алла и Джеффри USA_a.gif

AllaAndJeffery.PNG

Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Brazil
Timeline
Posted
Alex, not only my moral compass but English teacher too. You knew what I was saying. No, I am not saying my relationship with Alla is more important. They are different and cannot be prioritized.

I didn't ask you to compare the love, but the importance they have in your life. It seems obvious to me that you're saying your relationship with your fiancee is more important than your relationship with your children. If you're saying something different, please correct me.

Also, I think this is the source of some confusion: do you know what an "ion" is? Look it up.

Not teaching you English. It's just I think some people thought you were saying they were similar because of the size of an ion.

You don't have to prioritize them in your mind, but that's exactly what you do if you choose to be near someone else over your children. No way around that, no matter how you want to talk around it.

Filed: Country: Indonesia
Timeline
Posted
For us, the subject came up before we decide to get married. If for some reason, my visa is denied, then we would move to my country. It will be super difficult because he cannot get permanent residency just by being married to me or very difficult to get a job. But he will move until we can get solution for him to stay permanently in Indonesia.

With regards to the discussion about parents being separated from their kids, I know 2 families back home whose dad worked as ship crewman (one in cargo ship, the other work for cruise ship). They will be gone for 6 months at least & usually once or week or so their dad will call home. The kids grew up pretty much without their dad but their mom stay at home full time & they were around friends & families. Is their father a bad person for choosing/having a career like that? I mean, they could come up with same amount of income if he works 2 or 3 jobs (and probably would not be home much) but live at home? And being ship crewmen was pretty much all they know how to do.

Not knocking your theory, but making a choice to earn a living away from home to support the family is kind of different than making a choice to be away from the kids for a woman.

btw, it was not a theory. One couple (whose dad works for cargo ship) they stayed married until he retires. They are few years younger than my parents age (in their 60's), the children are my age. The children seem to be doing fine.

The other couple (dad works for cruise ship), they are few years older than me in their mid-late 30's. They got 1 child together, he is probably 4 yo now. The couple got divorced 1 year ago, I heard from my parents. His parents & my parents are neighbours.

I-130

Jun 28 2004 : Received at NSC

Oct 25 2004 : Transferred to CSC

Oct 29 2004 : Received at CSC

Nov 8 2004 : Received response from CSC that my file is being requested & review will be done

Nov 10 2004 : Email & online status Approved

Nov 15 2004 : NOA 2 in mail

Dec 16 2004 : NVC assigns case number

Dec 20 2004 : NVC sent DS 3032 to beneficiary, copy of DS 3032 & I-864 fee bill to petitioner

Jan 3 2005 : Petitioner received copy of DS 3032 and I-864 fee bill. Post-marked Dec 23rd.

Jan 11 2005 : Beneficiary received DS 3032 in Indonesia

Jan 31 2005 : Sent DS 3032 to NVC

Feb 8, 2005 : NVC received DS 3032

Feb 21, 2005 : IV fee generated

Feb 25, 2005 : Sent I-864 fee bill

Feb 28, 2005 : I-864 fee bill delivered to St Louis

Mar 3, 2005 : IV fee bill received

Mar 7, 2005 : Sent IV fee bill

Mar 9, 2005 : IV fee bill delivered to St Louis

Mar 28, 2005 : I-864 fee credited against case.

April 6, 2005 : Received I-864 package

April 7, 2005 : Immigrant Visa fee credited against case.

April 11, 2005 : DS 230 is generated

Aug 12, 2005 : I-864 & DS 230 received by NVC

Sep 14, 2005 : RFE on I-864

Nov 3, 2005 : Checklist response received at NVC

Nov 25, 2005 : Case completion

Dec 9, 2005 : Police Cert requested from the Netherlands

Jan 12 2006 : Interview success - Approved !!

Jan 19 2006 : Visa & brown envelope picked up

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Russia
Timeline
Posted

I am not talking around it. I don't know what it is you want to draw from me. Tell me and I can try to respond.

Alex, not only my moral compass but English teacher too. You knew what I was saying. No, I am not saying my relationship with Alla is more important. They are different and cannot be prioritized.

I didn't ask you to compare the love, but the importance they have in your life. It seems obvious to me that you're saying your relationship with your fiancee is more important than your relationship with your children. If you're saying something different, please correct me.

Also, I think this is the source of some confusion: do you know what an "ion" is? Look it up.

Not teaching you English. It's just I think some people thought you were saying they were similar because of the size of an ion.

You don't have to prioritize them in your mind, but that's exactly what you do if you choose to be near someone else over your children. No way around that, no matter how you want to talk around it.

Jeffery AND Alla.

0 kilometers physically separates us!

K-1 Visa Granted... Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Alla ARRIVED to America... Wednesday, 12 November 2008

russia_a.gif Алла и Джеффри USA_a.gif

AllaAndJeffery.PNG

 

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