Ugh, I feel sick now

[Gina_Love 0]

I was thrilled when I found this board but then became sick as I began to read why certain visas were denied for some and reading about illegal bashing for those dealing with illegals.

I guess I am guilty of the illegal bashing too, since my husband and I do not agree with the whole "illegal protests" going on, and claiming rights when you really don't have any.

On the flipside, though, my husband is illegal. He was brought here by his mother at age 5 and abandoned pretty much with an aunt. They obtained a legit SS# (Not Valid For Employment) for him and he attended US public schools from 1st-HS. He did even break the law by working retail jobs here & there with his own SS# when he got older, it was either work, or rob someone to get money to eat, really.

When I met him he was 18 and really depressed. Here was someone who didn't belong here but knew nothing about his country of origin either. Even if he got deported or went back he doesn't know one soul nor has he ever been back since the age of 5. He considers himself more American than anything else but still, is legally not supposed to be here.

We did marry in the US, and he's even filed taxes on those retail jobs he had. He's gotten bank accounts & credit cards and pretty much lives like the rest of us. BUT he cannot get a job nor can he get a Driver's License.

He blames his mother everyday for bringing him here the way she did (she barely got her Permanent Resident Card after 10 years or so). I try to be optimistic for him but now after reading all these horror stories I'm now terrified to go to our appointment.

Our appointment is next week (K3 Visa), I didn't obtain a lawyer, and I'm scared he'll be denied and left with noone or a place to go.

Any suggestions? I am really very emotional right now and very worried, what do you guys recommend? Should I skip the interview and do the whole process again with a lawyer? Please give me honest feedback, I really appreciate it. Thanks.

[gwenneh 7]

I would recommend getting a lawyer, as you are probably not facing a hopeful situation next week. Working illegally is an offense for which your husband will receive a ban from the US. I wish you the best of luck, but get a lawyer right away.

[shirlJ831 0]

I tend to agree with Gwen on this one. I would more definately get a lawyer as this does not look good but I od wish you all the best honest

[elizaxyz 0]

I would consult a lawyer, and if you have a congressperson who is sympathetic to immigrant issues, it may be worth contacting him or her. It really sounds as though he's tried to to the right thing under difficult circumstances, but an advocate may be able to argue that case for you more strongly.

Good luck.

Edited April 30, 2006 by elizaxyz

[kc456 0]

You can also post on the Waivers forum http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showforum=113. People there may have more insight into your situation.

[iceyspots 0]

I'd recommend investigating a really good lawyer... yes this is a messed up situation and I've heard of it happening before, in fact I have a friend that is country-less! But he is now adjusting status in Canada.. Hope everything works out for the best

[Jersey Girl 2]

Agree, get a few professional opinions, if possible. But I'm curious: how did you apply for a K3 if he's in the U.S. already? What did you give as his address? Also, if his mother became a Legal Permanent Resident, couldn't she have sponsored him? Hopefully, you'll encounter sympathetic people who understand he had no say in how he came here, and is now trying to get legal status, even if it's late. Good luck.

[Gina_Love 0]

Agree, get a few professional opinions, if possible. But I'm curious: how did you apply for a K3 if he's in the U.S. already? What did you give as his address? Also, if his mother became a Legal Permanent Resident, couldn't she have sponsored him? Hopefully, you'll encounter sympathetic people who understand he had no say in how he came here, and is now trying to get legal status, even if it's late. Good luck.

I am almost 90% sure that we will not go ahead with our interview. I wish I would have done more research but stubborn me thought I had this thing down...oops!

I applied for a K3 because that's what I understood from the USCIS website. I put in both an I-130 & then the I-129. Being new to this whole immigration thing (and trying to save $ on a lawyer) I was under the impression that you get your Visa at the Consulate from the country you were married in (in our case US) and this Visa allows you to stay in the US while processing the AOS. I guess in my head I thought this was some new law that prevents people from having to leave the country...oh boy, lack of research I tell ya'.

As for the address, I used our current one in the US. He has no family in his country, and hasn't been there since he was 5, he can't even speak the language that well, lol.

The story behind his mother is that his father was actually the one who was supposed to put in the applications for the whole family, but ended up only applying for his mother only. They separated very early in the marriage and that was the end of that. His mother did put in an application when he was "unmarried/under 21" once she received her Permanent Residence...since we've gotten married we haven't heard much from her. His relationshop with his mother is actually very distant, seems she doesn't care much about what he's going through.

It's really a strange dilemma. As another poster said, he is trying to do the right thing. I actually encouraged him to do his taxes with his own SS just because it is the right thing to do in a very wrong situation. He's always felt very helpless, confused and bitter at all this. He doesn't belong here, nor there.

I guess we will go ahead and investigate a good lawyer and see what can be done. If he must stay in his country the only option would be to rent an apartment there while he takes care of everything.

I hate that I even put in the applications at all...but I'd rather I spent a few hundred than deal with the hassle of not being prepared for the consequences. And I think God I found this forum! (everything happens for a reason)

Thank you for your support, hopefully we can get through this. I think I've gotten an ulcer now <feelin' the burn>.

Any other suggestions would greatly be appreciated, for now, thanks a bunch!

[zyggy 9]

Agree, get a few professional opinions, if possible. But I'm curious: how did you apply for a K3 if he's in the U.S. already? What did you give as his address? Also, if his mother became a Legal Permanent Resident, couldn't she have sponsored him? Hopefully, you'll encounter sympathetic people who understand he had no say in how he came here, and is now trying to get legal status, even if it's late. Good luck.

I am almost 90% sure that we will not go ahead with our interview. I wish I would have done more research but stubborn me thought I had this thing down...oops!

I applied for a K3 because that's what I understood from the USCIS website. I put in both an I-130 & then the I-129. Being new to this whole immigration thing (and trying to save $ on a lawyer) I was under the impression that you get your Visa at the Consulate from the country you were married in (in our case US) and this Visa allows you to stay in the US while processing the AOS. I guess in my head I thought this was some new law that prevents people from having to leave the country...oh boy, lack of research I tell ya'.

As for the address, I used our current one in the US. He has no family in his country, and hasn't been there since he was 5, he can't even speak the language that well, lol.

The story behind his mother is that his father was actually the one who was supposed to put in the applications for the whole family, but ended up only applying for his mother only. They separated very early in the marriage and that was the end of that. His mother did put in an application when he was "unmarried/under 21" once she received her Permanent Residence...since we've gotten married we haven't heard much from her. His relationshop with his mother is actually very distant, seems she doesn't care much about what he's going through.

It's really a strange dilemma. As another poster said, he is trying to do the right thing. I actually encouraged him to do his taxes with his own SS just because it is the right thing to do in a very wrong situation. He's always felt very helpless, confused and bitter at all this. He doesn't belong here, nor there.

I guess we will go ahead and investigate a good lawyer and see what can be done. If he must stay in his country the only option would be to rent an apartment there while he takes care of everything.

I hate that I even put in the applications at all...but I'd rather I spent a few hundred than deal with the hassle of not being prepared for the consequences. And I think God I found this forum! (everything happens for a reason)

Thank you for your support, hopefully we can get through this. I think I've gotten an ulcer now <feelin' the burn>.

Any other suggestions would greatly be appreciated, for now, thanks a bunch!

This is pretty tough.. this is a situation that will definitely require a lawyer's attention. But it most likely will involve his leaving the US to go to a third country and then applying for permanent status there. A waiver of inadmissibility will likely be required. But there could be ways under older immigration laws that could be used to help. Only an immigration attorney will be able to hash this stuff out..

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

Hiya! I am really sorry to hear about your situation, I can't pathom how tough that must be. The only thing that I can tell you is that by your husband working in the US illegally, it DOES NOT get him banned from the States permanantly. Yes he will have to leave if that is the punishment that may be given to him, but it is for 5 years. The same thing happened to my husband's uncle. He went over to the US and worked there illegally and he now cannot entert he country for 5 years. I know that it is somewhere on one of the links what the punishment is, but I do know for a fact that it is 5 years unless they have changed it recently. Please keep your chin up and don't give up. THe only reason why my husbands uncle didn't hire a lawyer was because he had no intention of living in the US permanantly, just wanted to earn some money while out there on a 3 month holiday. If he had gotten a lawyer, it could have been dropped with a fine attached or not give so many years to stay out of the country. I know it is easier said than done, but remember that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Kindest Regards,

Laura and Ian

[Jersey Girl 2]

Gina, you may be withdrawing from the interview at a good time, before there's irreparable damage. That's a good thing. Bringing a lawyer on board, regardless of the cost, is another good thing. You may feel better when it's in the hands of an expert. So make sure you get an expert immigration lawyer. Don't cheap out on this one.

Before you burn yourself out with an ulcer, play a fantasy game. Ask yourself: what's the worst that can happen? You both move to a rural part of Mexico where your husband is reunited with his family. They treat you like a princess and teach you how to make Mexican hot chocolate. You re-apply for his legal immigration. Your lawyer contacts local news media in the States with your story because immigration is a hot topic. You're interviewed on television and there's an outpouring of support. The government does not want to be embarrassed so your petition is granted. At that point, you've fallen in love with Mexico and decide to stay.

[Gina_Love 0]

Gina, you may be withdrawing from the interview at a good time, before there's irreparable damage. That's a good thing. Bringing a lawyer on board, regardless of the cost, is another good thing. You may feel better when it's in the hands of an expert. So make sure you get an expert immigration lawyer. Don't cheap out on this one.

Before you burn yourself out with an ulcer, play a fantasy game. Ask yourself: what's the worst that can happen? You both move to a rural part of Mexico where your husband is reunited with his family. They treat you like a princess and teach you how to make Mexican hot chocolate. You re-apply for his legal immigration. Your lawyer contacts local news media in the States with your story because immigration is a hot topic. You're interviewed on television and there's an outpouring of support. The government does not want to be embarrassed so your petition is granted. At that point, you've fallen in love with Mexico and decide to stay.

Yes, by all means, that is what I will do. Funny how I was blindly led to this forum with such an enormous amount of helpful people & information BEFORE I went next week...can I say I have an angel on my shoulder? WHEW!

As for your fantasy game, that's a good one. My dad has been saying the same thing. He's from Europe & always jokes he's going to retire in Mexico one day and wouldn't mind staying there if my husband ever has to, lol. Unfortuntately, my husband doesn't have any family that he knows there...so we'd just have to make friends : D Too bad our Spanish is below conversational, lol.

And I can deal with the media...shoot, I've auditioned for American Idol...I looove cameras! Heh.

Thank you very much...to be continued.

[zyggy 9]

Gina, you may be withdrawing from the interview at a good time, before there's irreparable damage. That's a good thing. Bringing a lawyer on board, regardless of the cost, is another good thing. You may feel better when it's in the hands of an expert. So make sure you get an expert immigration lawyer. Don't cheap out on this one.

Before you burn yourself out with an ulcer, play a fantasy game. Ask yourself: what's the worst that can happen? You both move to a rural part of Mexico where your husband is reunited with his family. They treat you like a princess and teach you how to make Mexican hot chocolate. You re-apply for his legal immigration. Your lawyer contacts local news media in the States with your story because immigration is a hot topic. You're interviewed on television and there's an outpouring of support. The government does not want to be embarrassed so your petition is granted. At that point, you've fallen in love with Mexico and decide to stay.

Yes, by all means, that is what I will do. Funny how I was blindly led to this forum with such an enormous amount of helpful people & information BEFORE I went next week...can I say I have an angel on my shoulder? WHEW!

As for your fantasy game, that's a good one. My dad has been saying the same thing. He's from Europe & always jokes he's going to retire in Mexico one day and wouldn't mind staying there if my husband ever has to, lol. Unfortuntately, my husband doesn't have any family that he knows there...so we'd just have to make friends : D Too bad our Spanish is below conversational, lol.

And I can deal with the media...shoot, I've auditioned for American Idol...I looove cameras! Heh.

Thank you very much...to be continued.

Actually.. if you want your fiancee to ever see the US.. you do not want to live in Mexico.. ever. To get the waiver, you have to make a claim of hardship in that it would be a hardship for you to have to live in Mexico to be with him. If you live in Mexico, it would take away that argument...