Yardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 6)

[Sonshyne 2]

Even $9.99 is too much. I hate the thought of spending that to send down $50.

One of my SIL's is 16 and she's been clammoring for hoodies. Seems the craze is sweeping the teenagers on the island. My problem was finding a hoodie appropriate for JA. I mean, hello, I live where it snows.....they were all too thick. We found some at Sears. Got her a lightweight long sleeve one and a couple light short sleeve ones. Also slippers. Old Navy (flip flops) slippers all the time.

MIL is tricker......I think both of your ideas are lovely.

I'll look into those options too

[clairern 0]

Well guys; I have been logged on all morning but have not been able to catch up with the goings on (I will later). Here is my issue----

Bear with me, this is gonna be long.....sigh

Mike and I were introduced back in March 8 2007 by my sis-in-law. I went to Ja to meet him in April and then again in October. After we met for the first time, it was an instant connection and we found that we had a lot in common in regards to what our expectations are in a relationship. We grew up a couple of miles apart from each other, we are the same age--he is older by 2 months. He is a Seventh-Day Adventist. I was born one. We were both married and are now divorced. We are both educated and have great conversations.

When I visited him, I did what anyone in a relationship would do, brought him gifts (it was around his birthday) and when I got back home and he lost his job after hurricaine Dean, I helped him out financially.

After I met him I found that he was everything I wanted in a life partner. I started to look into this VJ and found this site that offered a wealth of information. As we continued to get to know each other, I told him that I wanted us to be together for the rest of our lives and he told me he wanted the same thing. When I mentioned to him about the ways we could go about achieving that in regards to the fiance visa, he told me that his father had filed a petition for him way back in 2000 and he has not heard anything about it. He went as far as to give me copies of his petition and his father's number and asked that I followup on it for him. That made me really happy because the process was already in place.

After I contacted his father and got his info I called USCIS got his NVC case number, I started to followup and was asked by him after explanation from me, to be his agent. Since then I have taken care of all correspondence to and from NVC and all fees have been paid by me.

I do not know if you all remember how stressed out I was earlier this year, about the DS-230 and police report? Well, we have finally gotten over the hurdle of having case complete.

Well, I called him last night to tell him the good news and he was all nonchalant and not too responsive to me. I asked him if everthing was alright and he said everthing was. I then said what was the matter then and he said "I want to go to sleep". I was very perturbed and pissed off because I find that very unusual a reaction for a situation like this.

Lately, as I stated in some post before, we have not been talking that much. He is hot and cold towards me. when I call him during the day at work, everything is alright and we have a graet conversation. When I call him at night (I try not to call him after 9:30pm--he goes to bed then) he is not too eager to talk to me and I find that disturbing.

I know what all has been said here on VJ and in the past few pages of posts--but I am here wondering what the heck is going on.

I called his father and step-mom last night and told them how I felt and told them that if and when he get the visa, I do not want him to come to my home. They should have him come to Florida and stay a while with them and I will see how things are and waht happens then. I want to wait to see if this behavior is just out of fraustration or what and will things change after he is here.

What do you all think about this and am I wrong in telling his father what I did?

Your thoughts and reaction to this would be really appreciated.

Sorry for the long post, I have no-one else to share things like this with and I am counting on my VJ sistas to give a listening ear and shoulder to lean on

[SweetSugahDumplin 0]

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

[*JG* 2]

Claire......

Has he voiced any objections before? About moving to the US, I mean?

Do you think he had an argument or something with his father that could make him hesitant to move?

He could just be scared. It is a big step for anyone.

I think at the very least, you need to have some good sit down, heart to hearts with him to find out what the problem is.

I absolutely think you are in the most perfect situation. With those of us on K-1's & K-3's we are given little time to live together and make that smooth transition from living apart to marrying and being together almost all the time at first. Someone I know was saying she wished they gave us 4 months before the K-1 expired. I said 6 would be even better. The transition is just so sudden and difficult to work with.

Anyhow, I think you are the luckiest girl I have heard of in a long time. Yes, use the time to see how it all flows. That is a brilliant thing to do.

And, no, since his father is directly involved in this one, I think it was appropriate to discuss with him. I am almost thinking you should've said all that to Mike first though. I think I would definately discuss it before he finds out from his father.

Edited March 7, 2008 by Jomo's girl

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

I have a question we are going to JA next month, does anyone know if we reach immigrations if I can go thru the Jamaican citizens enrty line with my hubby? Or do I have to go there the visitors line?

In the past when I've traveled with friends that were not U.S. citizen we would split up. But when I traveled with my family it didn't matter. They let us all stay together. When u goin again?

I have been in the non-citizen line where they have even pulled out everyone in a group travelling together with a national and allowed them to all go in the the nationals line. But, yes, over and over again I've seen the spouse and immediate family allowed to go in the nationals line.

We are seriously making plans for summer 2009. We have about 15 people right now who all are bugging us to do a group thing. Hoping to make it happen by fixing the financials this year and then gathering all the people I care about in the US and Canada and just doing it. Funny, I was just talking with my one friend about this last night.

They've been bugging me for 10 years to put together a trip to Jamaica with a lot of my co-workers. I keep turning them down. In '95 I was workiing at a hospital and I put together a trip of about 50 plus people. It was okay. People paid what they were suppose to pay, but when we got the the island they got on my frigging NERVES! I told them I would not be staying at the resort with them, because I wanted to spend time with my family and they were pissed. They wanted me to be their personal tour guide. We need a translator (JAMAICANS speak ENGLISH). We need to know where to go (all taken care of in the package that was purchased). They drove me INSANE. So, never again.

How in the heck did 50 people all travel together? Did you drive some big tour bus for them? Getting everyone to the same place at the same time would've driven me crazy.

Yah, that sounds like way too much work to me.

We were going to stay in Bogue at his adopted mom's house initially since White House doesn't have water and electric again. But after talking, we are going to stay with all of them and either going to do a resort to accomodate some of the kids going, or rent a villa for all of us. Not really putting much thought into it yet until ready to proceed.

They were all at Jamaica Grande and the tour person that I worked with was an old friend of mine who also had a bus company. You know one of those HUGE busses. He had several of those. I didn't drive them anywhere or told them where to go. It all worked out though in the end...they just got on my figgin nerves. Worse thing I did was give a few of them that I was close to my dad's house number.

[*JG* 2]

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

My daycares were usually for 6 week olds up to 12 year olds. They were open year round and had school bus service available. Opened at 6 a.m. and closed at 7 p.m.

It all depends on the age of the child and the services needed. Babies usually cost more then as they get older. And, once in school, it is considerably cheaper. I paid roughly $150-200 a week, depending on what I needed and where they went.

The answer to if I thought my husband would stay home and watch the kids..........HELL NO! Mine just wouldn't. He can only stand being home so much and then he's practically jogging off to his job. He is great with the kids and they adore him, so that's not the issue.

I have a question we are going to JA next month, does anyone know if we reach immigrations if I can go thru the Jamaican citizens enrty line with my hubby? Or do I have to go there the visitors line?

In the past when I've traveled with friends that were not U.S. citizen we would split up. But when I traveled with my family it didn't matter. They let us all stay together. When u goin again?

I have been in the non-citizen line where they have even pulled out everyone in a group travelling together with a national and allowed them to all go in the the nationals line. But, yes, over and over again I've seen the spouse and immediate family allowed to go in the nationals line.

We are seriously making plans for summer 2009. We have about 15 people right now who all are bugging us to do a group thing. Hoping to make it happen by fixing the financials this year and then gathering all the people I care about in the US and Canada and just doing it. Funny, I was just talking with my one friend about this last night.

They've been bugging me for 10 years to put together a trip to Jamaica with a lot of my co-workers. I keep turning them down. In '95 I was workiing at a hospital and I put together a trip of about 50 plus people. It was okay. People paid what they were suppose to pay, but when we got the the island they got on my frigging NERVES! I told them I would not be staying at the resort with them, because I wanted to spend time with my family and they were pissed. They wanted me to be their personal tour guide. We need a translator (JAMAICANS speak ENGLISH). We need to know where to go (all taken care of in the package that was purchased). They drove me INSANE. So, never again.

How in the heck did 50 people all travel together? Did you drive some big tour bus for them? Getting everyone to the same place at the same time would've driven me crazy.

Yah, that sounds like way too much work to me.

We were going to stay in Bogue at his adopted mom's house initially since White House doesn't have water and electric again. But after talking, we are going to stay with all of them and either going to do a resort to accomodate some of the kids going, or rent a villa for all of us. Not really putting much thought into it yet until ready to proceed.

They were all at Jamaica Grande and the tour person that I worked with was an old friend of mine who also had a bus company. You know one of those HUGE busses. He had several of those. I didn't drive them anywhere or told them where to go. It all worked out though in the end...they just got on my figgin nerves. Worse thing I did was give a few of them that I was close to my dad's house number.

So, you don't want to plan this trip for me then?

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

My girl....be ready for STICKER SHOCK!...but it all really depends on where you live. Where I am in Maryland I waited until my son was 16 weeks old. I was paying $250 a week. Once he turned 1 it went to $200, then I put him at pre-school at 2.5 for $150week. It doesn't stop there...then you have to deal with before and aftercare. My son is 5 and he starts elementary school in August before and after care is $115 a week/aftercare is $90. I'm changing my schedule at work so I can drop him in the morning and Marcel (God's will)...will be here to pick him up. If not, I'll be paying aftercare.

My friends in Florida pay way less. A few of my friends that live in Pembrook Pines pay $80 a week...I just wanted to cry...and that's full-time daycare.

It never ends. But I see nothing wrong with dad staying home (if it's cheaper). Women have done it for years. I have no hangups about that. I'll bring home the bacon, but I won't fry it up. He better have my dinner ready.

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

My daycares were usually for 6 week olds up to 12 year olds. They were open year round and had school bus service available. Opened at 6 a.m. and closed at 7 p.m.

It all depends on the age of the child and the services needed. Babies usually cost more then as they get older. And, once in school, it is considerably cheaper. I paid roughly $150-200 a week, depending on what I needed and where they went.

The answer to if I thought my husband would stay home and watch the kids..........HELL NO! Mine just wouldn't. He can only stand being home so much and then he's practically jogging off to his job. He is great with the kids and they adore him, so that's not the issue.

I have a question we are going to JA next month, does anyone know if we reach immigrations if I can go thru the Jamaican citizens enrty line with my hubby? Or do I have to go there the visitors line?

In the past when I've traveled with friends that were not U.S. citizen we would split up. But when I traveled with my family it didn't matter. They let us all stay together. When u goin again?

I have been in the non-citizen line where they have even pulled out everyone in a group travelling together with a national and allowed them to all go in the the nationals line. But, yes, over and over again I've seen the spouse and immediate family allowed to go in the nationals line.

We are seriously making plans for summer 2009. We have about 15 people right now who all are bugging us to do a group thing. Hoping to make it happen by fixing the financials this year and then gathering all the people I care about in the US and Canada and just doing it. Funny, I was just talking with my one friend about this last night.

They've been bugging me for 10 years to put together a trip to Jamaica with a lot of my co-workers. I keep turning them down. In '95 I was workiing at a hospital and I put together a trip of about 50 plus people. It was okay. People paid what they were suppose to pay, but when we got the the island they got on my frigging NERVES! I told them I would not be staying at the resort with them, because I wanted to spend time with my family and they were pissed. They wanted me to be their personal tour guide. We need a translator (JAMAICANS speak ENGLISH). We need to know where to go (all taken care of in the package that was purchased). They drove me INSANE. So, never again.

How in the heck did 50 people all travel together? Did you drive some big tour bus for them? Getting everyone to the same place at the same time would've driven me crazy.

Yah, that sounds like way too much work to me.

We were going to stay in Bogue at his adopted mom's house initially since White House doesn't have water and electric again. But after talking, we are going to stay with all of them and either going to do a resort to accomodate some of the kids going, or rent a villa for all of us. Not really putting much thought into it yet until ready to proceed.

They were all at Jamaica Grande and the tour person that I worked with was an old friend of mine who also had a bus company. You know one of those HUGE busses. He had several of those. I didn't drive them anywhere or told them where to go. It all worked out though in the end...they just got on my figgin nerves. Worse thing I did was give a few of them that I was close to my dad's house number.

So, you don't want to plan this trip for me then?

JG -- I love you, but I only have 6 EYELASHES left.

[Jengles 0]

Ok ladies next question...

I want to take something nice for my MIL and SIL when we go, they haven't called to ask for one thing since he's been here. I can't ask him what he thinks they'd like because he doesn't even no we're going. So I am asking for suggestions. I was thinking something from bath and body, or maybe a piece of jewelry.

they don't want clothes?? most jamaicans I know want clothes to bring unless the men want some sort of electronics.

[*JG* 2]

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

My girl....be ready for STICKER SHOCK!...but it all really depends on where you live. Where I am in Maryland I waited until my son was 16 weeks old. I was paying $250 a week. Once he turned 1 it went to $200, then I put him at pre-school at 2.5 for $150week. It doesn't stop there...then you have to deal with before and aftercare. My son is 5 and he starts elementary school in August before and after care is $115 a week/aftercare is $90. I'm changing my schedule at work so I can drop him in the morning and Marcel (God's will)...will be here to pick him up. If not, I'll be paying aftercare.

My friends in Florida pay way less. A few of my friends that live in Pembrook Pines pay $80 a week...I just wanted to cry...and that's full-time daycare.

It never ends. But I see nothing wrong with dad staying home (if it's cheaper). Women have done it for years. I have no hangups about that. I'll bring home the bacon, but I won't fry it up. He better have my dinner ready.

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

My daycares were usually for 6 week olds up to 12 year olds. They were open year round and had school bus service available. Opened at 6 a.m. and closed at 7 p.m.

It all depends on the age of the child and the services needed. Babies usually cost more then as they get older. And, once in school, it is considerably cheaper. I paid roughly $150-200 a week, depending on what I needed and where they went.

The answer to if I thought my husband would stay home and watch the kids..........HELL NO! Mine just wouldn't. He can only stand being home so much and then he's practically jogging off to his job. He is great with the kids and they adore him, so that's not the issue.

I have a question we are going to JA next month, does anyone know if we reach immigrations if I can go thru the Jamaican citizens enrty line with my hubby? Or do I have to go there the visitors line?

In the past when I've traveled with friends that were not U.S. citizen we would split up. But when I traveled with my family it didn't matter. They let us all stay together. When u goin again?

I have been in the non-citizen line where they have even pulled out everyone in a group travelling together with a national and allowed them to all go in the the nationals line. But, yes, over and over again I've seen the spouse and immediate family allowed to go in the nationals line.

We are seriously making plans for summer 2009. We have about 15 people right now who all are bugging us to do a group thing. Hoping to make it happen by fixing the financials this year and then gathering all the people I care about in the US and Canada and just doing it. Funny, I was just talking with my one friend about this last night.

They've been bugging me for 10 years to put together a trip to Jamaica with a lot of my co-workers. I keep turning them down. In '95 I was workiing at a hospital and I put together a trip of about 50 plus people. It was okay. People paid what they were suppose to pay, but when we got the the island they got on my frigging NERVES! I told them I would not be staying at the resort with them, because I wanted to spend time with my family and they were pissed. They wanted me to be their personal tour guide. We need a translator (JAMAICANS speak ENGLISH). We need to know where to go (all taken care of in the package that was purchased). They drove me INSANE. So, never again.

How in the heck did 50 people all travel together? Did you drive some big tour bus for them? Getting everyone to the same place at the same time would've driven me crazy.

Yah, that sounds like way too much work to me.

We were going to stay in Bogue at his adopted mom's house initially since White House doesn't have water and electric again. But after talking, we are going to stay with all of them and either going to do a resort to accomodate some of the kids going, or rent a villa for all of us. Not really putting much thought into it yet until ready to proceed.

They were all at Jamaica Grande and the tour person that I worked with was an old friend of mine who also had a bus company. You know one of those HUGE busses. He had several of those. I didn't drive them anywhere or told them where to go. It all worked out though in the end...they just got on my figgin nerves. Worse thing I did was give a few of them that I was close to my dad's house number.

So, you don't want to plan this trip for me then?

JG -- I love you, but I only have 6 EYELASHES left.

Oh, girl. Everytime you say that, I just feel for you!

You know that really isn't a great excuse in this case.....It's Jamaica. You can wear sunglasses! Who will know then?

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

Claire......

Has he voiced any objections before? About moving to the US, I mean?

Do you think he had an argument or something with his father that could make him hesitant to move?

He could just be scared. It is a big step for anyone.

I think at the very least, you need to have some good sit down, heart to hearts with him to find out what the problem is.

I absolutely think you are in the most perfect situation. With those of us on K-1's & K-3's we are given little time to live together and make that smooth transition from living apart to marrying and being together almost all the time at first. Someone I know was saying she wished they gave us 4 months before the K-1 expired. I said 6 would be even better. The transition is just so sudden and difficult to work with.

Anyhow, I think you are the luckiest girl I have heard of in a long time. Yes, use the time to see how it all flows. That is a brilliant thing to do.

And, no, since his father is directly involved in this one, I think it was appropriate to discuss with him. I am almost thinking you should've said all that to Mike first though. I think I would definately discuss it before he finds out from his father.

Totally agree. Wow that a hard one, but you really need to talk to him and find out what he wants. To tell you the truth Claire, Marcel is not pressed to come here. He wanted me to come to Jamaica and married him, but I wasn't ready to give up my well-paying job in the states to start all over in Jamaica. I choose the K-1 route (even though I don't think 90 days) is enough to live with someone and really get to know them, but who knows. I lived with someone for 10 years and didn't know them at all.

My arms are all around you with hugs and support, but MOSTLY with prayers. we'll chat later.

Ok ladies next question...

I want to take something nice for my MIL and SIL when we go, they haven't called to ask for one thing since he's been here. I can't ask him what he thinks they'd like because he doesn't even no we're going. So I am asking for suggestions. I was thinking something from bath and body, or maybe a piece of jewelry.

they don't want clothes?? most jamaicans I know want clothes to bring unless the men want some sort of electronics.

Wahpen JENGS...u no love mi no more...what time is dinner?

[Jengles 0]

Even $9.99 is too much. I hate the thought of spending that to send down $50.

One of my SIL's is 16 and she's been clammoring for hoodies. Seems the craze is sweeping the teenagers on the island. My problem was finding a hoodie appropriate for JA. I mean, hello, I live where it snows.....they were all too thick. We found some at Sears. Got her a lightweight long sleeve one and a couple light short sleeve ones. Also slippers. Old Navy (flip flops) slippers all the time.

MIL is tricker......I think both of your ideas are lovely.

mr jengles younger brother wanted a hoodie also....he wanted to be gangsta...mr jengles give him one of his...

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

Well guys; I have been logged on all morning but have not been able to catch up with the goings on (I will later). Here is my issue----

Bear with me, this is gonna be long.....sigh

Mike and I were introduced back in March 8 2007 by my sis-in-law. I went to Ja to meet him in April and then again in October. After we met for the first time, it was an instant connection and we found that we had a lot in common in regards to what our expectations are in a relationship. We grew up a couple of miles apart from each other, we are the same age--he is older by 2 months. He is a Seventh-Day Adventist. I was born one. We were both married and are now divorced. We are both educated and have great conversations.

When I visited him, I did what anyone in a relationship would do, brought him gifts (it was around his birthday) and when I got back home and he lost his job after hurricaine Dean, I helped him out financially.

After I met him I found that he was everything I wanted in a life partner. I started to look into this VJ and found this site that offered a wealth of information. As we continued to get to know each other, I told him that I wanted us to be together for the rest of our lives and he told me he wanted the same thing. When I mentioned to him about the ways we could go about achieving that in regards to the fiance visa, he told me that his father had filed a petition for him way back in 2000 and he has not heard anything about it. He went as far as to give me copies of his petition and his father's number and asked that I followup on it for him. That made me really happy because the process was already in place.

After I contacted his father and got his info I called USCIS got his NVC case number, I started to followup and was asked by him after explanation from me, to be his agent. Since then I have taken care of all correspondence to and from NVC and all fees have been paid by me.

I do not know if you all remember how stressed out I was earlier this year, about the DS-230 and police report? Well, we have finally gotten over the hurdle of having case complete.

Well, I called him last night to tell him the good news and he was all nonchalant and not too responsive to me. I asked him if everthing was alright and he said everthing was. I then said what was the matter then and he said "I want to go to sleep". I was very perturbed and pissed off because I find that very unusual a reaction for a situation like this.

Lately, as I stated in some post before, we have not been talking that much. He is hot and cold towards me. when I call him during the day at work, everything is alright and we have a graet conversation. When I call him at night (I try not to call him after 9:30pm--he goes to bed then) he is not too eager to talk to me and I find that disturbing.

I know what all has been said here on VJ and in the past few pages of posts--but I am here wondering what the heck is going on.

I called his father and step-mom last night and told them how I felt and told them that if and when he get the visa, I do not want him to come to my home. They should have him come to Florida and stay a while with them and I will see how things are and waht happens then. I want to wait to see if this behavior is just out of fraustration or what and will things change after he is here.

What do you all think about this and am I wrong in telling his father what I did?

Your thoughts and reaction to this would be really appreciated.

Sorry for the long post, I have no-one else to share things like this with and I am counting on my VJ sistas to give a listening ear and shoulder to lean on

I don't like that at all. Claire, my mom is also 7-day

[Mrs. Palmer 5]

Well guys; I have been logged on all morning but have not been able to catch up with the goings on (I will later). Here is my issue----

Bear with me, this is gonna be long.....sigh

Mike and I were introduced back in March 8 2007 by my sis-in-law. I went to Ja to meet him in April and then again in October. After we met for the first time, it was an instant connection and we found that we had a lot in common in regards to what our expectations are in a relationship. We grew up a couple of miles apart from each other, we are the same age--he is older by 2 months. He is a Seventh-Day Adventist. I was born one. We were both married and are now divorced. We are both educated and have great conversations.

When I visited him, I did what anyone in a relationship would do, brought him gifts (it was around his birthday) and when I got back home and he lost his job after hurricaine Dean, I helped him out financially.

After I met him I found that he was everything I wanted in a life partner. I started to look into this VJ and found this site that offered a wealth of information. As we continued to get to know each other, I told him that I wanted us to be together for the rest of our lives and he told me he wanted the same thing. When I mentioned to him about the ways we could go about achieving that in regards to the fiance visa, he told me that his father had filed a petition for him way back in 2000 and he has not heard anything about it. He went as far as to give me copies of his petition and his father's number and asked that I followup on it for him. That made me really happy because the process was already in place.

After I contacted his father and got his info I called USCIS got his NVC case number, I started to followup and was asked by him after explanation from me, to be his agent. Since then I have taken care of all correspondence to and from NVC and all fees have been paid by me.

I do not know if you all remember how stressed out I was earlier this year, about the DS-230 and police report? Well, we have finally gotten over the hurdle of having case complete.

Well, I called him last night to tell him the good news and he was all nonchalant and not too responsive to me. I asked him if everthing was alright and he said everthing was. I then said what was the matter then and he said "I want to go to sleep". I was very perturbed and pissed off because I find that very unusual a reaction for a situation like this.

Lately, as I stated in some post before, we have not been talking that much. He is hot and cold towards me. when I call him during the day at work, everything is alright and we have a graet conversation. When I call him at night (I try not to call him after 9:30pm--he goes to bed then) he is not too eager to talk to me and I find that disturbing.

I know what all has been said here on VJ and in the past few pages of posts--but I am here wondering what the heck is going on.

I called his father and step-mom last night and told them how I felt and told them that if and when he get the visa, I do not want him to come to my home. They should have him come to Florida and stay a while with them and I will see how things are and waht happens then. I want to wait to see if this behavior is just out of fraustration or what and will things change after he is here.

What do you all think about this and am I wrong in telling his father what I did?

Your thoughts and reaction to this would be really appreciated.

Sorry for the long post, I have no-one else to share things like this with and I am counting on my VJ sistas to give a listening ear and shoulder to lean on

Well, I feel like there could be several things going on here. I know he hasn't said anything yet...but is it possible that he could be going through some family issue or something at work? I know when my husband begins to feel really burdened with frustrations with his family or work, then he can be a bit ornery. And unfortunately, he doesn't let me know right away. I've learned to ask what is wrong, and he will say "everyting's alright", even though I know it's not. But I've learned that he will come to me in his own time, when he's able to talk about what's going on with him. I allow him to have his "man period" every now and then, because I know that I am not always the kindest or best to him when I'm having a hard time, and he gives me the time and space that I need when I need it. We've really gotten good at knowing "when to push and when not to push". If you have a gut instinct that something else may be going on, then by all means...GO WITH YOUR GUT!! I think it's good that he actually has somewhere else to go when he gets here instead of coming directly to your home, but my question is, how far are you from Florida? If/when he does come, do you think that you not allowing him to come to your home will create even more stress and tension? In the end though I think you should do what you feel is best for you and your relationship. And remember that it will all work out the way it is supposed to. I do believe that you should have this conversation with him though and let him know your intentions so there will be NO SURPRISES...and who knows...maybe that will open the door to conversation regarding the difficulties that you have been experiencing lately. Good luck. And I'm here for you!!

[Yaads 0]

Awww Lawny how sweet of him to send flowers Yuh inna heat bad now, hope these help

Sonny I think something from bath and body works would be great or some nice jewelry or perfume. Good luck finding something nice!

[Jengles 0]

hi guys do u think any of ur SOs would object to being a stay at home dad if need be if its cheaper than daycare? By the way what are infant daycare costs like and the times in which u can drop them off and pick them up.

I can't say this loud enough but YES, most jamaican men do not like to be at home, looking after pickney, even if it's theres. they want to work be out the house.